by Ivy Smoak
I got the ball rolling by deleting all the texts Dr. Lyons had sent me since I escaped in an Uber. Then I hovered my finger over the BLOCK button. With one click, he’d be gone from my life.
“Are you sure you want to get rid of Dr. Lyons?” asked Chastity. “Maybe you should think about it for a little while. I mean…it is that time of the year when you start to act strange.”
“Are you talking about my period? You know that’s a monthly thing, right?” Or did Chastity get knocked up and not realize it?
“Yes, I know periods are a monthly thing. I’m talking about the anniversary of Rosalie’s disappearance.”
“Oh.” I bit the inside of my lip. That was indeed coming up. But I’d been trying not to think about it. Although, by actively forcing myself not to think of it…I was pretty sure that meant I was thinking about it. “I don’t think that makes me act differently. Yes, I’ll be sad on the day of. But other than that…”
“Ash. Last year around this time you followed an elementary school teacher for five blocks and then watched her with a pair of binoculars through the school windows. You almost got arrested for being a pervert.”
“Well she looked a lot like Rosalie. And why is everyone so freaked out that I own a pair of binoculars? They’re not the creepy kind. They’re…”
“The fancy opera watching ones. Yeah, I know, you told me. But the year before that you ordered 50,000 baking cups that had a picture of Rosalie’s face on the bottom in hopes that someone would recognize her and give you a call.”
“I stand by that tactic. If Joe hadn’t canceled the order, it might have worked.”
Chastity took a big swig of her wine. “Okay. But you have to admit that your plan to move to Somalia last May wasn’t completely rational.”
“I think it was the pinnacle of rationality, actually. They have a very favorable tax rate. With how much the cupcake business was pulling in, it just made sense financially.”
“Somalia has been in the middle of a civil war for like the last 30 years.”
“Well no location is perfect.”
“Last May you also tried to convince me that we should shave our heads.”
I waved her comment off. These examples were all so random. She was acting like I wasn’t weird the other 364 days of the year. Trust me, I was. “That’s also unrelated to Rosalie. I just happened to read an article about the horrors of head lice and wanted to be proactive.”
“Fair point. Lice are disgusting. But still…my point remains. Your judgment around his time of year is typically a little suspect. I’m just trying to make sure that ditching Dr. Lyons is really what you want. I feel the need to reiterate that he’s a war hero doctor with a giant penis. I don’t know what more you could want in a man.”
I nodded. “You’re right. On paper, Dr. Lyons is perfect. But he’s not Tanner. And Tanner is what I want.”
“Is he? Or does Tanner just feel like the safer option because you know he’s unavailable? And since he won’t even start a relationship, then he can’t break your heart like Joe did.”
“That’s crazy talk.”
“Is it?” She stared at me.
“I’m not crazy.”
She just kept staring at me.
“I’m not sabotaging myself. Tanner gives me butterflies. Honestly, him stalking me every Tuesday and Thursday evening was the only thing that got me through the past few months. And now seeing him at work is the reason why I can bear to wake up at 6 a.m. and put on real people pants. I want him. And I’m going to make him want me. His issues be damned.” I slammed my empty wine bottle down on my coffee table to accentuate my point.
“Alright,” said Chastity. “Then let’s figure out what his issue really is.”
“So you don’t think he’s a vampire?”
“I mean…there’s like an 80% chance it’s that. I double-checked and the garlic really shouldn’t have been cooked.”
I knew it. Vampire! “And that’s why he couldn’t come to work today. It was really sunny out.”
“Fair point. But we should probably rule out some other possibilities before we make that leap.”
“What possibilities?”
“Well…” Chastity pulled a notebook out of her purse. There were tons of notes scribbled on the first page. Most of them were paranormal creatures.
“Those don’t seem more reasonable than him being a vampire. He’s definitely not an amphibious larva of the Loch Ness monster.”
“Right.” Chastity flipped to a blank page and clicked a pen open. “Let’s start with what we know.”
“Okay. He’s a dirty stalker.”
Chastity nodded and wrote STALKER. And then she added BILLIONAIRE. “Are we still in agreement that the place he took you to at the Caldwell Hotel was just a random rental? Since none of his stuff was there and one of his LLCs owns a place at One57?”
“Yes. He was just being super secretive.” Like always. “Or the Caldwell Hotel is just his apartment while he’s doing wishes for the Society or something.” I was still hoping Frankie would text me and say I could move into the Caldwell Hotel. “Either way, he definitely lives in One57. And he’s about 28 years old. He owns Rhodes Venture Capital, which owns a number of businesses and shell companies. Oh, and his Society alter-ego is Ryder Storm.”
“Got it,” said Chastity when she was done writing all those bullet points. “Anything else?”
“He mentioned that he went to high school overseas.”
“Anything about his parents? Or siblings?”
“Uh… No. Not really. Come to think of it, he never really talks about himself that much. Even that first night when we talked for hours, he mostly just asked a ton of questions about me.”
Chastity wrote FULL OF SECRETS in big bold letters at the top of the page.
“And most importantly, he claims that he can’t be with me because he pissed off someone very dangerous. Really, what kind of billionaire can’t just pay someone off? It doesn’t make any sense.”
“I’ve been thinking a lot about that very question,” said Chastity. “It actually reminds me of when Daddy lost everything. One minute we had it all - an NYC penthouse, a mansion in the Hamptons, drivers, maids. Paintings worth a million dollars. And then one day all of it was gone.” Chastity sniffled and looked longingly at the boxes of Odegaards stacked around my tiny apartment. “Daddy never talks about it, but from what I’ve been able to piece together, he was overleveraged and a few investments started to go south. So then he started making increasingly risky investments to cover those losses. One thing led to another, and even though we were living like billionaires, our net worth was actually negative. Eventually it all caught up to him when the IRS showed up to collect unpaid taxes.”
“So you think the IRS is after Tanner?”
“Could be. Or it could be someone scary. Or both. Either way…he must not have the money to pay them. That’s probably why he hired BIMG. One final hail Mary to try to make his businesses profitable before it all comes crashing down.”
“Damn. You really think so? He seems so calm for someone drowning in debt.”
Chastity looked off into the distance. “Daddy never freaked out either before his big collapse. He was working late hours, yes, but that was nothing new.”
“I don’t know. It seems more likely that he’s a Russian oligarch who’s done something to piss off Putin. Those guys are billionaires, and they can still disappear.”
“That does fit with him growing up overseas,” agreed Chastity. “But after that it kind of falls apart. He doesn’t have a Russian accent. And he’s not exactly hiding. If the Russian government was after me I’d go off the grid in North Dakota or something rather than setting up shop as a venture capitalist in the middle of NYC. Anyway…there’s only one way to learn all of a man’s secrets.”
“Which is what?” I asked.
“Sex.”
“Well I should have seen that answer coming. So you think he’ll tell me everything i
f I seduce him?”
“That would be the easiest thing, yes.”
“But he keeps running away whenever we kiss!”
“Have you tried taking your top off and dropping to your knees? That always works for me.”
“I wish he’d let me do that. But I’m not sure I could handle the embarrassment of trying that and getting rejected.”
“Well then you’re lucky I have a backup plan.”
I reached for my wine bottle and was devastated to find that it was already empty. “I’m going to need about three more bottles of wine before I agree to let you seduce him.”
“Are you asking me to have a threesome with you and Tanner?” Chastity smiled so hard. “I’m honored!”
“What? No! Who do you think I am? Madison?”
Chastity laughed. “Ew. I don’t want to have a threesome with an actual lesbian. It’s only good if both girls are straight.”
“What?” I shook my head. “Please tell me that’s not really your backup plan.”
“Nope. But it’s actually not a bad idea as a last resort. Single Girl Rule #28: All girls should try at least one threesome. You’ll need to try it eventually. But we can talk about that later. My backup plan is to find a way to talk to some more people in the Society. Didn’t Frankie mention something about him being a total player?”
“Yes.” My stomach did a little backflip at the thought of him with other women.
“Well, then one of the girls he’s banged must know his secrets.”
“You really think so?”
Chastity nodded. “Yup. Guys talk after sex. Everyone knows that. That’s why prostitutes make the best spies.”
“I hate this idea.”
“Well it’s possible we won’t have to talk to one of his former lovers. We could always seduce one of his friends. Surely his friends know his secrets.”
“But we don’t know any of his friends.”
“True. Well, then how about some other guy at the Society? They must all be close.”
“It’s an interesting plan, but it’ll never work. Tanner is always with me during my dates.”
“Except when you blew Dr. Lyons.”
I cringed. “What are the odds of him getting called away for work again during a wish?”
“He’s a billionaire with like 30 different businesses, so actually quite high. But I don’t think we have to worry about that. Because I’ve been asking around, and I’ve found out an interesting little morsel of information.”
“Do tell.”
Chastity leaned forward and whispered like she was telling me the greatest secret ever. “Apparently the Society isn’t all waxings and wishes. In fact, rumor has it that the wishes are just a screening process before you get access to the real thing - a sex club called Club Onyx.”
“It didn’t say anything about that in the contract.” I got out my phone to check the app to see if I’d missed something.
“Of course it didn’t. What kind of amateurs do you think they are?”
“Fair point. So where is this Club Onyx located? And how are we going to get in? And what kind of wild stuff goes on there? Is it even crazier than the wishes?!”
“Oh, I have no idea about any of that. I just found the name of it earlier today, so I haven’t had time to do much research. But I’ll start digging. And we can get Madison and Liz to look into it too. Maybe Madison can like…torture a dude until he tells her or something. And if Club Onyx ever has a furry night, then it’s extremely likely that Liz will have all the details.”
“Oh God. If Liz has been there for a furry night, then count me out.”
“Right. The Liz thing is mainly just to see if the place is a bunch of freaks that we should avoid at all costs.”
“Glad we’re on the same page.” If Club Onyx was too freaky for Chastity, then it would definitely be too freaky for me. “So what’s my role in all this? Try to slip away from Tanner during the next wish to ask some people about Club Onyx?”
“If you get the opportunity, yes. But mainly you should keep getting closer to Tanner. If you open up to him more, then maybe he’ll let something slip that we can use to figure out his secret. Asking him for the day off on Rosalie’s birthday would be a good place to start.”
Oh God. “Just being around Tanner makes me nervous. But the thought of telling him all about Rosalie makes me want to crawl into a hole and never come out. There’s like a 100% chance that I’ll break down crying like a crazy person in the middle of the conversation. Won’t it be easier if I just like…don’t show up for work that day and pretend like I got hit by a bus or something?”
“No. Come on! This is the perfect opportunity to open up to him. Just ask him tomorrow and get it over with.”
“I hate my life.” Mainly because I knew she was right. I had to do it. Especially because most places had a policy that required two weeks’ notice for paid vacation.
“It won’t be as bad as you think. Guys act weird when girls get emotional. Maybe Tanner will panic and take his pants off right then and there to try to make you feel better.”
“Is that really a possibility?”
“Eh,” said Chastity. “It’s possible, but not likely. In my experience it only works like 33% of the time.”
What? How often did Chastity cry to seduce random men? There was no time to think about that, though. Because I was already rehearsing in my head how weird it was going to be when I started crying in Tanner’s office tomorrow. I tried to focus on just the image in my head of him whipping his giant dick out to comfort me.
Chapter 39 - Swimming with the Sharks
Thursday
I gave a little knock on Tanner’s open office door. I’d been working up the nerve to come talk to him all day long.
His face lit up when he looked up from his laptop and saw it was me. “Hey.”
“Do you have a minute to talk?” I asked as I stepped into his office.
He glanced at his watch. “Actually, I don’t. I have an appointment in 5 minutes.”
“Oh.” Damn it! I just wanted to get this over with. “No problem. It can wait until later.”
Tanner waved my comment off. “It doesn’t have to wait. You should just come with me.”
“To your doctor’s appointment?”
“Doctor? Who said anything about a doctor?”
Right. Not everyone scheduled as many doctor’s appointments as I did. He was probably a normal person who only had quarterly checkups. Or was it annually for regular people? Who knew. It made sense that it was a business meeting instead.
“Shall we?” Tanner shut his laptop and stood up.
“Uh…sure.”
I followed Tanner out to the elevator.
“So why’d you think it was a doctor’s appointment?” asked Tanner. “Do I look sickly this afternoon?”
“Not at all.” I gave him a quick up-down. Usually he wore a full suit at work, but today he’d taken his jacket off and rolled up his sleeves. His strong forearms were spectacular. “If anything, you look like a strapping young lad.” What the fuck did I just say?
“Well that’s awfully sweet of you. You’re looking swell yourself.” He held the elevator door open for me. “After you, m’lady.”
I stepped on and tried to quickly change the subject. “Are you sure I should come? I don’t even know who we’re meeting.”
“Neither do I. Honestly that’s half the fun.”
What the hell is he talking about? How could he not know who he was meeting? Then it hit me. He was a billionaire investor. Part of his job was to help his businesses grow, but he also heard pitches from new entrepreneurs who were hoping he’d give them an investment. Like on Shark Tank. Which meant this was going to be freaking amazing. “You’re really going to let me join you?”
“Sure. It’s not a big deal.”
“Uh…it may not be a big deal to you. But it’s a huge deal for me. I always used to dream of getting to do this. Joe kept telling me that one day we’
d get to if we could grow the cupcake business big enough.”
Tanner gave me a weird look. “What are you most excited about?”
“I don’t really know. I’ve always imagined just sitting there like a total boss. But I think the best part will be closing the deal. Being able to make someone’s wildest dreams come true will be such an amazing feeling.”
For a second he just looked…really sad. Which made sense. I sure as hell wouldn’t want someone to make investments with my hard-earned money.
“Wow, I’m a crazy woman making this all about me. I know that I’m just going to be sitting in the background while you do your thing.”
He cleared his throat. “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s adorable how excited you are. I admit, I’m not thrilled by the idea of it. But I’ve always known this would happen eventually. It’s best to just rip the Band-aid off.”
I shoved his arm. “Stop. Seriously…I won’t say a word. I’ll just sit and watch.”
“Let’s just see what happens.”
We stepped off the elevator at the top floor of the building. But instead of walking through a hallway lined with shark-filled tanks, we were greeted by a bubbly blonde wearing what looked like a cross between a maid uniform and very colorful lederhosen.
“Hello again,” she said in a weird European accent. “If you need anything, just let me know.” She hit a button and two doors slid open to a hallway. Still not lined with shark tanks.
“Thanks, Olga,” said Tanner like they were old friends. “Ash here is new to all this, so it might be nice if you can walk her through the etiquette.”
“Of course,” she said.
“Great!” Tanner turned to me. “I’ll see you in a few minutes. Room three.” He walked off down the hallway.
Olga walked around the reception desk. “So there are a few things you need to know.”
“Okay…”
“First, you must shower before entering the sauna.”
“Sauna?”
Olga smiled. “Yes. This is a Finnish sauna. The very best in the city.”
