Letters to a Lady

by Joan Smith

  Diana felt a nearly overpowering urge to demand why Lady Selena was being made to marry Harrup. It was only civility that forbade it, but no such civility need hamper her from asking Harrup later. The Beechams left, and the carriage went first to take Ronald home.

  Ronald turned a stiff face to his sister. “Well, I did what you said,” he told her. “I kept my tongue between my teeth and didn’t say a word against Harrup. I even said she must marry him. I felt like a murderer, Di. Selena didn’t cry, but her eyes were glazed. I know she should be mine, but the gods think otherwise.”

  “I cannot imagine why her parents are pushing this match forward,” she admitted.

  “Because Harrup is Harrup, and for no other reason. What I cannot understand is why he insists on having her. Why must the wretched libertines always marry the sweet, innocent girls? It tickles their perverted fancy, like a cat playing with a mouse.”

  Diana said nothing. She would not encourage Ronald, but she felt morally bound to discuss the matter with Harrup. He could not be aware that Lady Selena disliked him.

  How could he? She never said anything. It happened that Harrup was dining out that evening, so she waited up for him. It was ten o’clock when he came in, whistling. His carefree mood annoyed Diana, who had been pacing his study, racked with worry.

  Harrup stuck his head in at the door, beaming a smile.

  “Oh, good, you waited up for me. You may congratulate me, Di!” he said, and came in.

  “Harrup, you have been made attorney general!” she exclaimed, smiling. His announcement put everything else out of her mind.

  “No, not yet, but I have seen Laura. I can stop worrying about the letters. She doesn’t have them. She returned all of them she had kept.”

  “It’s odd she didn’t keep the two warmest ones, when she kept the others,” she pointed out, unconvinced.

  Harrup, smiling fondly, sat down and poured two glasses of wine. “She wanted to keep them, but when she was preparing to leave Hitchin, she decided the wiser course was to burn them, in case they went astray. Very considerate of her.”

  “Yes, very considerate,” Di said, “incredibly considerate, and I mean that literally. You actually believe her?”

  “You don’t know Laura as I do,” he said, looking into the distance. “She is the best—the most—a civilized woman is what I mean. Not the petty sort a man too often ends up with.”

  Diana narrowed her eyes at this unlikely story. “How much did you give her?”

  “Five hundred,” he admitted unblushingly.

  “What had she to say about Markwell?”

  “She was furious with him. He was with her when you called—she admitted it. She told him you were bringing the letters to me, and he left very shortly after. She had no idea he meant to steal them. She didn’t know he had stolen them. He was her lover till today. That is why she is breaking with him. In fact, Laura and I may—oh, after the treacle moon is history, I mean,” he added hastily, when he saw the wrath gathering on Diana’s brow.

  “You are despicable!” Diana hissed. “Ronald is right. Lady Selena, despite her muteness, is too good for you. Will you please tell me, Harrup, why you insist on marrying an innocent young girl who hates you?”

  Harrup’s merry mood evaporated. “What are you talking about?” he demanded angrily.

  “You know perfectly well what I am talking about. Lady Selena doesn’t love you, and you don’t love her.”

  “The word you used was hate!”

  “It comes to the same thing in the end. She’s being forced into this marriage by her parents—her father, I suspect, since her mother is considerably worried.”

  “She is not being forced! I asked her to marry me—she said yes, without blinking. Her mother was grinning from ear to ear when we told her the news.”

  “Well, she’s not grinning now. She asked me to look after Selena when you have abandoned her in the country. The fact of the matter is, you have decided your position requires the respectability of marriage and are willing to sacrifice that poor child—chosen because other men stare at her beauty. What kind of a creature are you?”

  Harrup’s face was white, his nostrils quivering indignantly. “Arranged marriages are nothing new under the sun. Now that you’ve given vent to your ill-bred piece of impertinence, Miss Beecham, perhaps you would deign to tell me what in my behavior has earned the word despicable?”

  “I am talking about your bare-faced gall in standing there, telling me you plan to return to Mrs. Whitby after the honeymoon with Selena. I am perfectly well aware such things happen, but to plan them in advance of the wedding must surely be a new low in behavior, even for the likes of you.”

  “It was just a fleeting thought! I didn’t say anything to Laura.”

  “You didn’t give her five hundred pounds as an option on her future services, either, I suppose? Or continuing services,” she added. “The wedding isn’t for two months. A man of your kidney would hardly deprive himself of his lightskirt for so long!”

  Harrup summoned all his dignity. “You take an overweening interest in my affairs!” he said coolly.

  “No, I take no further interest whatsoever in your affairs. My only interest was to ingratiate you so you’d give Ronald a position. But it’s not worth it. Ronald said so himself, and for once he’s right. I shall be leaving in the morning. Common decency compels me to warn you Ronald is in love with Selena, and I believe the feeling is mutual. I sincerely hope she turns you off.”

  His dark eyes glowed dangerously. “Have you been running to her with tales of my doings? You have the audacity to accept my hospitality and repay it in this manner? Do you think Groden is unaware of my character? Do you really believe any gentleman in my position is much different? Groden approached me with the idea. I didn’t go after his daughter. He knew I wanted a wife; he wanted a match for her. It’s a business agreement that I have every intention of fulfilling. Selena wouldn’t give a tinker’s curse if I had a dozen mistresses. I daresay she’d welcome them.”

  “No doubt that would be preferable to your lovemaking, but why should she have to settle for the lesser of two evils? She hasn’t done anything to deserve this. A young and trusting daughter is not a piece of merchandise to barter with. She may have lacked the gumption to object before she came to know you. I think you’ll find the girl has changed, now that she’s been exposed to a few hours of your attentions. You were wise to try to shimmy out of even that token show of respect to your future wife, Harrup. You chose the wrong substitute in Ronald, however. He loves Selena, you see. It’s a condition that occasionally afflicts real people. I don’t believe it’s contagious, so you need not fear contamination.”

  Diana rose and strode angrily toward the door. “And I didn’t let Ronald say a word against you, either,” she said over her shoulder, just before slamming the door.

  She knew sleep was impossible and didn’t even bother undressing when she had closed her bedroom door behind her. She paced to and fro, thinking of a dozen other things she should have said, yet half regretting she had said so much. But really it was unconscionable for Harrup to marry Selena. Not that Groden would let her cry off, and certainly not for a mere squire’s son like Ronald. It was a hopeless situation. She wished she could pack up her bag and leave that very night. At least she could warn Peabody they’d be leaving early in the morning.

  She went to the adjoining door and tapped lightly. A muffled voice told her to come in. A small lamp burned beside Peabody’s bed. On the pillow Peabody’s cap moved restlessly.

  “I hope I didn’t awaken you?” Diana said.

  “I’m not sleeping, Di. I have got one of my earaches. I was out in the garden with Mrs. Dunaway this afternoon looking for a corner where she could plant some herbs, and the wind got at me.”

  “Oh, dear! I hope it isn’t very bad.”

  “I think if I take some laudanum I might find a few minutes’ sleep.”

  “I’ll ask Mrs. Dunaway if she has some
.”

  Diana went in search of the housekeeper and found her in her parlor. “Here you go, dear. Be sure you bring back the bottle. I may need a drop myself. The wind didn’t bother my ears, but my knees are aching like a bad tooth. It’s the rheumatism.” She sighed.

  After Peabody was settled in, Diana said, “Do you think you’ll be fit to travel tomorrow, Peabody? I hoped to get an early start.”

  “Tomorrow? You forget Harrup has asked us to stay a week. I thought you were looking forward to it.”

  “I’ve quarreled with him. I’d really like to leave.”

  “Can you never behave properly? What happened?” Peabody demanded.

  “It’s his marrying Selena. I cannot like it. He shouldn’t marry her.”

  “It’s a match made in heaven,” Peabody replied.

  “No, made in the House of Lords. I’m afraid I’ve put Harrup in a pelter.”

  “Pshaw. It will have blown over by the morning.”

  Diana didn’t think the quarrel would dissipate so quickly, but she hoped the earache would. She went back downstairs with Mrs. Dunaway’s laudanum, and as she approached the stairs to return to her room, Harrup came into the hall.

  “I’d like to speak to you for a moment, Diana,” he said.

  His mood was milder now. Not only had the anger vanished, but a shadow of apology colored his voice. “What is it?” she asked curtly.

  He showed her into his office, and they both sat down. “I have behaved poorly to a guest and dear friend. I want to apologize, and urge you not to go darting off before your visit is completed.”

  Diana compared the conciliating words with the stiff face that was speaking them and chose a moderate course. “I may have to remain another day. Peabody has one of her earaches. I was just returning Mrs. Dunaway’s laudanum.”

  He gave a rueful smile. “Here I thought you were making an excuse to come downstairs to patch up our quarrel.”

  “No, but I daresay I said more than I ought, and I am sorry I said it. Which doesn’t mean I take it back.”

  “If that is an apology,” he said doubtfully, “you are forgiven. I’m not such an ogre as you think, you know. I had no idea Selena actively disliked me. ‘Hate’ is a strong word. I must know if it came from Selena herself.”

  “It’s Ronald’s word, actually. ‘Fear’ and ‘revulsion’ were a couple of others. I do think the girl is afraid of you.”

  He shrugged. “There’s no reason for her to be. I’ve never said a cross word to her in my life.”

  “Have you taken the time and trouble to say any kind ones?” she asked gently. “She’s young, Harrup. Naturally she’s frightened to be pitched into marriage with an older gentleman she scarcely knows from Adam.”

  “If she doesn’t marry me, she’ll marry someone like me. I know she has always feared her father, and perhaps I’ve fallen under his shadow. Groden would never permit Selena to marry Ronald. He’s ambitious. He married all his daughters off to noblemen. He won’t permit her to jilt me at all, and a gentleman can hardly call off the match. I want you to know I intend to allay Selena’s fear, hatred, and revulsion before the wedding. I shall make a marked effort in that direction. You’ll see.” He smiled. “I’ll bring her round my thumb. It’s not only lightskirts I can charm. A woman is a woman.”

  “Then I’m happy I spoke to you. It was worth it if it makes Selena’s future life a little easier. Her mama would be happy with me. Already I’m looking out for her daughter. I find satisfaction in it, too,” she mused.

  “Take care, or you’ll end up a maiden aunt, Di, mothering everyone else’s children. What you ought to do is get busy and have some of your own.”

  “What I ought to do is go to bed,” she said wearily.

  A satirical gleam shone in Harrup’s eyes and he replied, “That is the first step, certainly.”

  Diana shook her head. “You’re incorrigible, Harrup.”

  “I’m not, you know. I just never found a stern lady to correct my evil ways. No one ever ripped up at me so violently before.”

  An image of Selena’s mild face flashed into Diana’s mind. “And never will again,” she said.

  “What, have you given up on me? I think I might be tamed with a little persistence.”

  She remembered Selena and her kittens. “You’re not my tiger, thank goodness.”

  When Diana glanced up, Harrup was gazing at her steadily. There was a peculiar, concentrated look in his eyes. An air of surprise, somehow. Her glass was empty, and she refilled it, still with his dark eyes following her, making her self-conscious. She swished the wine around in the glass, watching the reflected light swirl. “Selena likes kittens, Harrup. Did you know that? She has no use for tigers. Why don’t you give her a kitten? She’d love it.”

  He hesitated a moment before speaking, and when he spoke, his voice was low. “A leopard can’t change his spots, and I expect a tiger doesn’t lose his stripes without a good deal of effort, but I shall try. I’ll buy Selena a kitten. What color would she like?”

  “Need you ask? White, of course.”

  “Of course.”

  “If it has lost an ear or eye, so much the better.”

  “A collector of strays, is she? No wonder Ronald appeals to her. Speaking of Ronald, what position is it he wants?”

  Ronald’s working for Harrup no longer appeared feasible, given the circumstances of Selena’s being forever between them. “Something that will keep his nose in a book. He’s intelligent, Harrup. He would make an abominable M.P. or anything that requires public appearances, but as a speech writer or research man for policy decisions, he would be ideal.”

  “I thought he would take over the Willows.”

  “Papa’s only fifty,” she pointed out. “After the expense of a university education, Ronald is expected to add a few baubles to the family tree. Anything you could do would be appreciated.”

  He looked at her askance. “For that you had to ingratiate me? That’s not an extraordinary request from a neighbor.”

  “Well, to tell the truth, it was your special assistant we had in our eye, but now that he’s decided he loves Selena, it’s not a good idea for him to be too much in your pocket.”

  Harrup rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Very true. That would provide a dangerous proximity to my fiancée. Lady Groden is not entirely pleased with the match, I think you intimated?”

  “She seemed worried. You will be kind to Selena, won’t you, Harrup? I think if Selena is happy, Ronald won’t do anything foolish. He mentioned Gretna Green, but really he is much too passive to try anything of the sort. He’d end up asking me to hire the carriage and come along to chaperon them.”

  Diana finished her wine and left, happy to have made it up with Harrup and relieved that he wasn’t really so bad. Harrup sat drumming his fingers on his desk, wearing a pensive expression. What had gotten into him to tell Di his vagrant thoughts about returning to Laura? It was no more than that, a passing thought. He was treating Di as if she were one of his cronies—he must remember she was a young lady, and one with a temper that didn’t balk at tackling a tiger.

  Chapter Seven

  Diana did not awaken early in the morning. It wanted only ten minutes of eight when she opened her eyes. It immediately darted into her head that if she hurried, she might catch Harrup before he left for the office. She bounded from bed and scrambled into her gown. It was while she sat in front of the mirror brushing her hair that she asked herself why she was in such a panic to see him before he left. She had nothing in particular to say to him. They had had a long cose the night before. All the little wrinkles between them were once more ironed out to their mutual satisfaction, yet something in her was eager to run downstairs with her hair still in tangles and see him.

  She could find no cause for her eagerness. It was just a vague feeling that she wanted to see him again before—what? She would see him at dinner. Her hasty departure was no longer spoken of. But at dinner they would not be alone—possibly
they would not even be together. Harrup might dine out with Lady Selena and the Grodens. She hastened to the head of the stairs and was about to set her foot on the first step when she heard Harrup taking his leave of the butler.

  “I’m off, Stoker. Say good morning to Miss Beecham for me. Tell her—oh, never mind. I’m not sure I’ll be able to return for luncheon. Make sure that she and Miss Peabody are comfortable and have whatever they desire.”

  Stoker mumbled a reply, and Harrup left. Diana returned to her room feeling cheated. She had missed him—he would probably not be home for luncheon. She wouldn’t see him till evening. A whole long day to be got in, somehow. At least, Harrup had left a secondhand “good morning” for her. He had been thinking of her. Diana was reluctant to look into her reasons for the feeling of emptiness that was within her.

  She went to see how Peabody’s earache was progressing, only to learn her chaperon was still afflicted with some pain.

  “I shan’t stay in bed all day, Diana,” Peabody told her, “but pray do not expect me to go out of doors, with that hard London wind blowing. It is the nasty Thames that fills the air with moisture and does the mischief. I pray Ronald escapes it. You must send a note off and ask him to take you about the city.”

  Diana made sympathetic sounds, but she found no pleasure in a contemplation of seeing London with Ronald. Again she asked herself why. Her occasional trips to London were the highlights of a dull life. This one was proving more interesting than usual. Life was sumptuous under Harrup’s roof, despite their quarrels. A quarrel was not something Diana ever dreaded. And still she hesitated to look into the cause for her gloom.

  Her mind skated around the issue while she took breakfast alone. Unhappiness with Harrup’s coming marriage to Lady Selena certainly accounted for a part of her mood. It was an ineligible match in all but rank and wealth. With the best of intentions and some effort on his part, it might be a decent marriage, but it would never be a good one. Two more unsuited persons would be difficult to find, and Ronald would suffer into the bargain. Had she become a philanthropist over night, permitting the potential grief of others to cast her into the dismals? She was too honest to accept such an edifying picture of herself. She was just jealous of Lady Selena. She wanted to be Harrup’s bride herself, to stand beside the attorney general and share in some small degree his honors, his work.