[The Watchers 20.0] Dominion - Enduring

by SJ West

  “You’re almost there,” I say hoarsely, impatiently waiting for Cade to finish what he started.

  Cade bends down on one knee in front of me and places both hands on my hips. He slides his fingers on the inside of my last garment and slowly tugs them down my legs until they reach my ankles. As I step out of them, he stands back up. In one fluid motion, he lifts me in his arms and gently places me on top of the bed’s beige comforter.

  I look down at his jeans and ask, “Do you need my help taking those off?”

  Cade grins as he begins to undo the top button. “No. I think I can handle it.”

  And handle it he does. In barely two heartbeats Cade stands naked in front of me, making me thankful that we’re doing this in the middle of the day instead of at night. I would have hated to miss the sight of him completely nude in front of me for the first time. It’s a picture I never intend to forget.

  I hold my hand out to him. “Touch me, Cade,” I practically beg.

  Cade lies down beside me on the bed and pulls me into his arms until our bodies are firmly pressed together. The warmth of his body lulls me into a place of complete compliance. The smell of sugar cookies lingers on his skin like nectar, making him taste that much sweeter on my tongue. My mind drifts on a wave of ecstasy as he presses me back onto the mattress and begins to slide his mouth down my body to explore what else it has to offer him. When he touches the center of my being for the first time, I feel as though I’m drifting on a cloud made of pure bliss and he’s a warm, gentle breeze pushing me through the sky, coaxing me higher and higher until I can almost touch the stratosphere. I end up begging him to stop when the pleasure becomes more than I can handle.

  Cade kisses his way back up my body, stopping for a moment to pay special attention to my breasts, allowing me time to recover, even though I know my body needs more. There’s a ravenous hunger deep down inside me that only he will be able to satisfy.

  Never being shy about letting him know exactly what I want, I reach down between us as soon as Cade’s mouth reaches mine again. I grab ahold of the root of him, causing Cade to grunt slightly in pleasure as I position him between my legs. Thankfully, I don’t have to prod him any more than that. As he presses himself inside me for the first time, I feel a sharp, unexpected jolt of pain and involuntarily gasp from the feeling of being torn apart.

  “Helena?” Cade asks urgently, placing his hands on either side of my head as he looks down at me with worry. “Am I hurting you? Do you want me to stop?”

  I shake my head as the pain begins to subside in waves. “No. Don’t you dare stop. Don’t ever stop.”

  Slowly, Cade begins to thrust himself inside me. I know he’s moving slowly because he wants to make sure he isn’t hurting me. I do still feel a little bit of pain, but the faster he moves, the more the pain is pushed to the side by a buildup of pleasure. I lift my legs and place them around his waist, allowing him to go even deeper. There comes a point when the pleasure is too much for me to take, and a hot rush of blood courses through my body. I call out Cade’s name as he pushes faster and faster, finding his own release within the warm folds of my body.

  Afterwards, Cade lies down beside me, bringing me into his arms and kissing my face as if I’m the most precious thing in the world to him.

  “If I didn’t like you so much, I could kill you for making me wait so long for that to happen,” I joke, unable to stop myself from smiling as I look at him. For the first time in my life, I know what it feels like to be happy and content.

  “And if I didn’t love you so much, I could never have held myself back until you were ready for this to happen,” he states.

  I don’t make a reply. I don’t want to ruin the moment by pointing out the fact that he just said the L-word to me. Is he testing to see if I will say it back to him? I’m not prepared to delve into my true feelings for him just yet. The simple fact that I even said I like him seems enough of a commitment to me for the moment. Honestly, I’m not sure he realizes he said it aloud. I choose to ignore the word and snuggle up to Cade to bask in the afterglow of our lovemaking.

  Good grief. Now he has me thinking of it as making love too. Oh well, I guess I can give in that much. After all, they’re just words.

  “Did I hurt you?” he asks, kissing my forehead as we cuddle.

  “A little,” I admit because there’s no point in lying to him about it. “I really didn’t think about the whole virginity thing, to be honest.”

  “Neither did I. I guess I assumed you would have left that part out when you made your body.”

  “Apparently, I didn’t plan ahead well enough.”

  “Was it that bad?” he asks, sounding concerned over my welfare.

  “It was worth it,” I tell him, not wanting him to worry over something that doesn’t matter. “It was well worth it in fact, but ...”

  Cade raises his head off the pillow slightly to look at my face as I continue to rest my head on his chest.

  “But what?” he asks, sounding a little worried that our first time together was disappointing to me in some way.

  I lift my head up to look him in the eyes.

  “But,” I say, then pause for dramatic effect, “I hope you realize that now that I’ve had my way with you, I’m going to want more of the same in the very near future.”

  Cade smiles as he places his right hand behind my head, urging me to come closer for a kiss. Who am I to say no to such a tempting invitation?

  Besides, who knows where it all might lead…

  Chapter 19

  If I could make Heaven exist in the land of the living, I would make it a cabin on top of a snowcapped mountain with a roaring fireplace and a warm body lying next to me.

  “What are you thinking about?” Cade asks, tightening his arms around my waist as we lay on a makeshift pallet of comforters and pillows in front of the fireplace in the living room.

  “My idea of Heaven,” I answer truthfully, turning in his arms so I can face him. “I was just thinking that this is exactly the way I would want mine to be like.”

  My honesty earns me a sweet kiss on the lips.

  “It would be nice if we could just stay here forever,” Cade says as he rests his head back on the mound of pillows and looks at me with more tenderness than I deserve. “I wish we could.”

  I don’t make a reply because we both know I’ll have to leave soon. Anna’s trial starts today, and I want to be there to watch my sister’s downfall. Of course, I can’t tell Cade any of this. Besides, I don’t think it’s necessary for me to say the words aloud. Cade already knows about my plans to force Anna into exile, finally leaving the Earth vulnerable to my rule. Everything I’ve worked toward will come to fruition today. Even though I would love nothing more than to stay naked underneath the covers with Cade all day, there are things that need to be done.

  “When do you need to go?” Cade asks me, being smart enough to know that he can’t change my mind about leaving.

  “Soon,” I say, feeling my heart sink at the realization that our paradise will have to be put on hold for a little while. “But I’ll come right back after I’m through on Earth.”

  Cade’s brows furrow, but he does the smart thing by not trying to dissuade me from my goal. He doesn’t have to put his disapproval of my actions into words. I know just how much he detests what I’m about to do.

  Cade stands up, allowing me a full view of his perfect naked form as he walks away.

  “Where are you going?” I ask as I sit up and pull the comforter toward my chest.

  “I’ll be right back,” he calls over his shoulder as he heads toward the kitchen area.

  A few seconds later he returns, holding the plate of cookies we’ve been snacking on all night long. He hands me the small white plate that has the last remaining cookie on it. I think we were both eating around it because it was the ugliest of the bunch. The heart-shaped cookie is slightly burnt around the edges and not perfectly shaped.

  “Do I get to eat the
last one?” I ask as Cade retakes his place on the pallet next to me.

  “I want you to keep it,” he tells me. “And when you look at it, I want you to remember that there is someone in this universe who loves you.”

  “I appreciate the romantic gesture,” I say, finding his request an odd one, “but why didn’t you pick one of the perfect cookies before we ate them all up?”

  “Because I’m not perfect.”

  “I would beg to differ on that point, dear heart.”

  “No one is perfect, Helena,” he says as he looks down at the cookie. “You seem to think that I am, but I’m not. If I was perfect, I would be able to help you find a way to let go of your anger toward Anna.”

  “You’re not a miracle worker,” I tell him, trying to ease his guilt over such an insignificant shortcoming. “And that’s what letting go of my anger would take: a small miracle.”

  “Finally lowered yourself to sleep with the enemy I see …” we hear an unexpected visitor say to us scornfully.

  Cade and I both look up to see Lucifer standing in the middle of the living room, Evelyn by his side.

  “That was a very bad move, Evelyn,” I tell her menacingly, feeling my temper rise with her betrayal. “I’m surprised you’re taking Lucifer’s side in this matter.”

  “I’m not taking anyone’s side, except for maybe his,” Evelyn says, nodding her head toward Cade. “I think he deserves to know what you’ve done.”

  “Leave, Evelyn,” Lucifer tells her. “I don’t want you to get hurt, and Helena has that look in her eyes.”

  “What look?” I ask disdainfully.

  “The murderous one,” my father replies.

  Evelyn phases, leaving me alone with my father and my lover.

  Lucifer looks at Cade and begins to shake his head in disappointment.

  “You’re more of a fool than I thought you were,” Lucifer tells him. “How can you stay with her after what she’s done?”

  “Keep your mouth shut,” I snap at Lucifer.

  Realization dawns on my father’s face. “He doesn’t know what you’ve done, does he? I don’t know why I’m surprised by that. Of course you wouldn’t tell him about the genocide you committed.”

  My heart sinks.

  “Genocide?” Cade questions, looking at me with a startled expression on his face. “What’s he talking about, Helena? Does it have to do with what you wanted to hide from me?”

  “Of course it does, you fool,” Lucifer scolds condescendingly. “She used her henchmen to blow Virga out of the sky and frame Anna for it.”

  Cade’s face goes slack with shock.

  “Helena, is that true?” he whispers, as if he’s frightened to hear the truth. “Did you kill a whole cloud city full of people?”

  “Yes,” I answer because I know I can’t lie my way out of the situation. Cade would know if I tried to lie to him. “It was a means to Anna’s end.”

  Cade looks over at Lucifer. “How can anyone on Earth believe Anna would do such a thing?”

  “Helena had Jered’s son, Silas, and his cronies do a broadcast announcing that they did the deed in Anna’s name. Now my daughter has to go on trial for something she didn’t do.”

  Cade looks back at me. “That’s how you plan to force her into exile?”

  “Yes,” I reply. Strangely, I don’t feel as proud of the fact as I did yesterday, not with the way Cade is looking at me now.

  Cade begins to shake his head in dismay. “I can’t believe you would go so far just to exact your revenge on Anna. There were children in that city, Helena! Innocent people died just because you want to make Anna pay for merely existing.”

  “All humans die eventually. The only thing I changed was the amount of time they ended up spending on Earth. And before you get too judgmental, I can tell you many of the people in Virga don’t deserve your pity. What do you think made me fall to my knees the other day in the graveyard? I’ll tell you. It was a surge of new souls entering my domain. So before you get too weepy over their loss, remember that fact.”

  “Nothing you say can justify what you did,” Cade tells me bitterly.

  “I don’t need to justify myself to you,” I tell him.

  “No, you don’t,” Cade agrees, standing up in all his naked glory. “You’ll always do exactly what you want, no matter who gets hurt. I guess I’ve always known that fact deep down inside. I was foolish to think you might want to change for me, even if it was just a little bit.”

  “I am who I am,” I tell him unapologetically. “Take it or leave it.”

  “Then I’m going to have to leave,” Cade announces. I don’t have to be a human lie detector to know he’s telling me the truth. “I can’t stay with you, Helena, even though I want to. I can’t be with you, knowing that you’re framing Anna for something so horrific. I need to know you can change just a little bit because you care about me. I refuse to be with someone who isn’t concerned about what I think or how their actions will affect me and the people I love.”

  “I’m a creature of habit, not change,” I inform him tersely. “If you can’t stand being around me, then go ahead and leave. I won’t stop you.”

  “What you do today will affect us both,” Cade tells me. “You need to decide what’s more important to you: your hate for Anna or what we have together. I hope you choose the latter, but I won’t be counting on it. I know how deep your hatred for her goes.” Cade turns to look at Lucifer. “And you’re to blame for it.”

  “I’ve never forced Helena to do anything she didn’t want to do,” Lucifer defends himself.

  “That’s probably true, because I don’t think anyone can force her to do anything, but you’re the reason she hates Anna so much. You need to own up to that fact or Helena will never be able to get past it. You made her, Lucifer! You made her just like you made Seraphina, yet you keep trying to deny they’re the same. I thought being in Heaven all this time would have made you realize all your failings, but it seems to have just made you more stubborn in denying any of this is your fault. Be a father to Helena. Be a person worthy of calling Heaven his home again and tell her how sorry you are for treating her like dirt. You need to own the mistakes you made while you were alive and fix them. Why else do you believe God sent you back down here?”

  “To help Anna,” Lucifer says obstinately.

  “I don’t believe that’s the only reason, and from the look in your eyes, I think you’re realizing that I’m right. You need to fix the problems you caused while you were still alive, Lucifer.”

  “I’m not a problem that needs to be fixed,” I snap at Cade.

  When he looks down, I’m surprised to see pity in his eyes.

  “No, you’re a daughter who needs to know her father doesn’t hate her,” Cade tells me with more compassion than I deserve. “Everything you’ve done to Anna is just your way of acting out toward Lucifer. She represents what you want for yourself, and you’re determined to make her as miserable as you are, Helena. Can’t you see that? The sad thing is that I could help you build a life like Anna’s, if that’s what you really want. I could give you everything your heart desires, but you’re not willing to let go of your rage long enough to accept me into your heart. There’s no room in there for me, Helena—not until you stop hating Anna—and I won’t play second fiddle to your anger. You either have to stop this vendetta you have against her or let me go. The choice is yours.”

  Cade phases, and I see that he’s returned to his beach house on Earth.

  I look over at Lucifer. When our eyes meet, I can tell what Cade just said to him is making him think about all the time we spent together and how he shaped who I am.

  “You can leave now,” I tell him, detesting the fact that he’s so close. “I don’t need you to act like you care about me. We both know that would be a lie. You and I have been through a lot together over the years. I’ve lived with you hating me for a long time. There’s no reason for you to change how you feel about me now. You have everything y
ou’ve ever wanted. You don’t need me anymore.”

  “Do you feel like I abandoned you?” Lucifer asks in a low voice as he continues to stare at me.

  “Does it matter if I do?” I ask derisively. “You left, and I found out that I don’t need you. In fact, I’m happier without you always trying to be in charge. Look what I’ve achieved in your absence! You had thousands of years to find a way to rule the Earth, and yet you never quite took that final step to make it happen. I think it’s because you never wanted to go completely against your father. I always knew you loved the old bastard, and it was that weakness that stopped you from becoming who you were meant to be.”

  “And can your love for Cade do the same thing?” he questions.

  “I’ve never said I love him,” I’m quick to correct him.

  “You don’t have to say it,” Lucifer says. “I could see it in your eyes when he was talking to you. Are you really going to let the one person in the world who can truly love you the way you want to be loved slip through your fingers so easily? And for what? Just so you can exile Anna and her family to some distant off-world planet? Don’t you know how rare it is for creatures like us to feel love, much less find someone who can love us in return after all the bad things we’ve done to others? Destroying Virga doesn’t even compare to what I did to the world while I was still alive. Amalie was able to look past my sins and still find a way to love me for who she knew I could be. It took me a long time to see past my hate. I don’t want that to be your fate as well, Helena. I know I haven’t been a good … father … to you, but you need to know that wasn’t your fault. None of this is your fault. It’s mine, and I think my own father sent me here to finally realize that fact. If I hadn’t rebelled and hated Him so much for sending me to Earth, I wouldn’t have felt the need to make you.”

  “Why did you make me?” I ask, needing to know the reason for my existence.