Where You Belong

by Tracie Puckett

  “Five thousand dollars for the week,” I repeated.

  “And an extra thousand—”

  “If I fly out to California in December,” I said, confirming I understood.

  “You’re nodding. Is that a yes?”

  “I want to think about it. But this is where the conversation stops for today. I have to get home, preferably before my parents do.”

  “When are you expecting them?”

  “Five.”

  “Can I meet you tomorrow, see where you stand? Is that too soon?”

  “No,” I said. “You can come by for dinner tomorrow evening. My dad’s going to want to talk to you, anyway.”

  “Yeah?”

  “It was his car you hit.” Avery’s face drained of color. “I mean, it was mine, but it was in his name. He bought it. So if you’re avoiding the insurance claim, then your beef’s with Dad on that one.”

  “Okay,” he said, nodding. “But one more request? Could I talk you into coming back to the house? I don’t want you walking these woods alone, especially in all this mud. Let me give you a ride back home.”

  “I’ll come back to the farm,” I agreed, only because the cold had gotten to me, and I knew I’d never survive the walk back through Sutton Woods. “But I won’t get in a car with you. I don’t have a death wish.”

  “Oh,” he said, a smile tempting his mouth. “Okay, yeah. I guess I deserved that.”

  “I’ll get a ride from Wes, if the offer still stands.”

  He grinned. “Okay, then. Come on. I’ll walk you back.”

  Chapter Four

  “Mom is going to kill you.”

  “Nice to see you, too, Daniel,” I said, shutting the front door.

  “Nice to see me? That’s it?”

  No, but what I really wanted to say was nothing he’d want to hear. My little brother expected a flood of congratulations. He wanted a hug, and then he’d demand my undivided attention. No doubt he wanted me to ask about the game and offer him a chance to relive the moment that made him a local hero. But I had zero interest in playing that game. That was one song and dance I was definitely sitting out.

  “I thought you guys weren’t coming home until this evening,” I said.

  “Dad made us hit the road early.”

  I glared at my younger brother. Logic would say my frustration with him was sheer envy; he was taller and fitter than I could ever hope to be. He was by far the best looking in the family, even in spite of the fiery red hair he’d inherited from Mom. Add to that his incomparable athletic skills and his limitless success, and it was enough to make any sibling jealous.

  But the anger I felt toward him had nothing to do with jealousy . . .

  “Roz, honey, is that you?” Mom rushed into the room. Her shoulders sank, and she heaved a sigh. Ringlets of curls fell from her ponytail, and the wrinkles around her lips were darker today—proof enough she’d been worried. “Sweetheart, I’ve been calling you all morning. Where have you been?”

  “Out.”

  “Out?” She shifted for a closer look at me. She studied my wrinkled clothes, and then her eyes drifted to my muddied shoes. “Out where?”

  “Grabbing breakfast.” I bit my lip. “My phone’s dead; I forgot to charge it.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure she believes that,” Daniel scoffed.

  I fired back. “Shut up.”

  “Screw you.”

  “Screw you.” I started after him.

  “Roz, stop.” Mom shook her head. “What in the world has gotten into you lately?”

  Daniel flashed a cocky smile and threw himself back on the couch. Smug jerk.

  When Mom finally eased away, content that I wouldn’t kill my brother, Daniel perked up again. “So where were you again?”

  I gritted my teeth. “I was at breakfast.”

  I couldn’t care less about lying to him, but I hated to lie to Mom. There were no secrets between us. Trying to survive in a household full of boys, she and I only had each other.

  It was probably unhealthy how much I shared with her; she knew things even my best friends didn’t know—like, every tiny detail about the three romantic entanglements of my past. There was my first real crush on Scott Park in the second grade, and that time Hunter Reekles kissed me at the end of our sixth grade dance. And then, of course, she was totally up to speed on my two-year, one-sided, and completely fantasized relationship with Avery.

  Mom hadn’t encouraged I pursue any of those avenues, and I wasn’t challenging her on that.

  I was holding out for something better—a feeling, the kind that makes you weak at the knees with a single glance. The sort of dizzy, happy, blissful feeling that leaves you short for breath. The kind that makes you smile so much your face hurts, and the very feeling that makes you refuse sleep because no dream could ever measure up to the lucid happiness of being awake.

  The kind of feeling Mom felt when she first met Dad . . .

  I didn’t want to settle for anything less than that, because my parents were proof enough that it was real. It existed. It was out there. And I knew that, if I were patient, I’d feel it someday, too. When the stars aligned, and the time was right, the perfect guy would come along out of the blue, and we’d have that instant connection. And until that day arrived, I’d wait. I wasn’t in any hurry, and in the meantime, I was content to dream.

  Dreaming was always a lot more exciting than reality, anyway. Or . . . at least it used to be . . .

  I pushed the image of Avery from the forefront of my mind and focused back on Mom.

  She was still waiting for an explanation, and the truth wasn’t something I could tell her. I’d always tried to be upfront with my mother, so it killed me to lie about everything I’d lied about lately.

  It’d all started on Halloween night, back when Sara Oliver showed her stupid face at Carter’s surprise party. And to cut Avery a little slack, I could admit that she was part of the reason my life had gone to hell. I couldn’t put all the blame on him.

  “Where’s Dad?” I asked, hoping to push the focus elsewhere, and it worked.

  Mom nodded to the den. “Where do you think?”

  “Right.”

  It was Sunday, which meant it was game day, so Dad was in Man Cave Quarantine, giving all of his time and attention to his one true love—football. It was too early for the game, but that never stopped him from soaking up every last drop of the pregame shows.

  “Did you guys have fun this weekend?”

  “Oh, it was wonderful, Rozzy,” Mom said, shaking her head. “I hate that you missed it. Your brother shines out on the field. You would’ve loved it.”

  “I bet,” I said, forcing a smile. “I’m glad you had fun.”

  “You’ll be at the next one. This is only the beginning of huge things for Danny.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure it is.”

  “You want to come up and help me unpack? We’ll talk some more?”

  “Yeah.” That was an offer I’d never turn down.

  Mom was in and out on business trips a lot; she was a consultant for an online marketing firm, and it was her job to travel to all the big cities, attend conferences, and lead large discussion panels for the attendees. Because she traveled so often, we usually spent a great deal of our time talking, gossiping, and laughing as we packed and unpacked her suitcases. We took advantage of what little moments we had. It was our thing, and one I wouldn’t trade for the world.

  Once upstairs, Mom tossed her luggage up on the bed, and she flicked a look at me.

  “Now that it’s just us,” she said, “anything you want to share?”

  “How did you know?”

  “I’m your mother. I always know.”

  “You won’t be mad?”

  “Roz, honey.” She patted the mattress. I climbed up and sat next to her. “Of course I’ll be mad.”

  “But you don’t even know—”

  “If it’s scandalous enough to lie about, then—”

  “It’s not al
l that scandalous,” I promised, dropping my head back to look at the ceiling. How would I even start to explain? “I wasn’t feeling well last night, so I stopped at Delta’s to get some soup.”

  “In other words, you were feeling great, so you met your friends for your weekly hangout at the diner. Come on. Let’s skip the half-truths. Shoot straight with me.”

  “I met the girls,” I admitted. “And Jasper.”

  “Okay.”

  “And when I left, I walked out to come home, and . . .” I sighed. “Someone hit my car.”

  Her mouth gaped open.

  “It was parked on the street, and the guy just swung too wide to park his SUV,” I said, purposely brushing past the part about “the guy” being Avery.

  Mom asked me to shoot straight with her, but any mention of Avery Chase was not the way to sell this story. She’d see it as complete fiction, thinking I’d made up some elaborate lie to cover my butt for a mistake I was responsible for. And admittedly, it was my own damn fault. I’d been guilty of telling a little white lie or two in the past to add flavor to a story, so she had every right to question my sincerity when things got a bit dramatic.

  Mentioning Avery wasn’t the way to go. She wouldn’t see my admission as the truth, because who would? And then she’d stop listening, assume the worst, and I would be on the hook for something I didn’t do. So if leaving Avery’s name out of the mix saved me even the tiniest bit of grief, I would keep that small detail to myself for now.

  “Mom, it was bad,” I continued. “There was a lot of damage. I couldn’t drive it home, so Wes Barrett brought his tow truck. I was freaking out and completely shocked, and adrenaline just got the best of me, and . . . I passed out. Right on the street.” I pushed my blond hair off my face, revealing the bump. Mom’s eyes widened at the large bruise. “Wes was worried that I’d hurt myself, and he wanted to make sure I was okay. He called Stephen, and Stephen advised him to take me back to the Barrett Farm for the night—just for close observation. He didn’t want me staying home alone.”

  “Why didn’t he call us?”

  “You were upstate with Daniel. You couldn't have done anything.”

  “We could’ve come home,” she said, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Honey, are you okay? How do you feel?”

  “Sad. My car’s totaled, Mom.” I looked down to my hands. “Wes says the repairs will cost more than the car’s worth.”

  “I’m sure he’s right.” She shrugged a shoulder. “It was one gentle breeze from falling apart. I don’t know what your father was thinking when he brought that thing home.”

  “He was thinking, gee, here’s something nice I can do for my daughter on her sixteenth birthday,” I said. “I know you hated it, and everyone else thought it was a piece of crap, but . . . Ally’s dad never bought her a car, and Mel has worked every day for a year to save up money to buy one for herself. Carter and Nora have to share theirs.” I shrugged. “I don’t know, I was just really grateful to have it, and now it’s gone.”

  “Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry.”

  “He’s going to come over tomorrow night, just so you know.”

  “Wesley?” she asked. “That’ll be nice. We haven’t seen him in ages, and we should make him dinner to thank him for taking care of you while we were away.”

  “No, not Wes,” I said. “The guy who hit my car. I gave him our address, and I told him he could come for dinner. I thought it would be a good opportunity discuss payment for the damage.”

  “What about insurance?” Mom asked, and I shook my head. “He doesn’t have insurance?”

  “He’ll talk to Dad. I’m not really sure what the plan is.

  “Okay, I’ll let your father know what’s going on, but—”

  “But?”

  “You and I both know he’ll probably never let you stay home alone again.”

  “And you’re nuts if you think I’ll believe that.”

  Dad was the least hands-on parent I’d ever met, and he was the last one in this family who’d start dishing out rules and consequences. He and Mom played good cop, bad cop a little too well, and sometimes I’d swear she resented him for it.

  Mom was the one with all the rules, the one who always went out of her way to keep everything in check. She’s the one who’d wished for us to stay little forever, because that was the only way she could ensure our safety.

  “I’m seventeen, you know.” I smiled. “I’ll be eighteen in one week.”

  Mom smiled back, pulling me in for a hug. She pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “You’re a good kid, Rozzy. I have the best kids, you know that?”

  “Yeah.” I closed my eyes as she cradled me closer.

  No matter how old we grew, she would always see us as her babies, and I’d never shatter that illusion.

  As long as she wanted to believe she had the three best kids on the planet, I would let her go on believing that, because I couldn’t let her find out otherwise. I would never be the one to break that woman’s heart.

  Stephen was always a handful.

  And maybe I had a tendency to stretch the truth from time to time, but if I could say so myself, I wasn’t all that bad.

  But Daniel? Her sweet little baby, the all-star athlete, the golden child of the family . . . what he was doing could destroy her world forever, and I would never let that happen. Which is why I had to come up with every penny of that $5,000 he owed.

  I had to pay for the mistakes my brother had made, and I needed to do it before my parents caught wind of what was going on. I couldn’t let him break my mother’s heart, which meant I had to agree to Avery’s proposition, because it was the only way to save my family.

  I had no other choice.

  Chapter Five

  Apparently I was crazy.

  That was the only explanation for any of this.

  I snuck out of the house at eleven o’clock that night, certain that my family was fast asleep. With Dad’s keys clenched in my fist, I tiptoed to the driveway, hopeful for a quiet getaway.

  Sutton Woods was a ghost town. All of the local businesses were closed for the night, and the only lights burning on Main Street were from the lantern posts that lined the road. I drove out of town, passing both Ally’s and Carter’s homes along the way.

  Fifteen miles into the country, I pulled off into a long driveway, winding up the gravel path to reach the Barrett Farm. The night seemed darker out there away from the rest of the world. There were no streetlights. No neighbors. Not a single noise or sign of life . . .

  I shivered.

  Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. No, this was definitely a bad idea, but what choice did I have? I’d tossed and turned for hours. And I’d stay that way—sleepless and anxious—until I finally settled this deal with Avery once and for all. I needed that money, and this lie was my only guarantee for a huge payday.

  I parked the car right behind Wes’s tow truck, got out, and ran up to the front porch. At least there was a light burning next to the door, and that one small glow made this whole situation feel a little less like the beginning of a horror movie.

  Balling my hand into a fist, I summoned the courage to knock on the door. A solid minute went by without any response. I knocked again—nothing.

  It was a long shot. Any sane person would be tucked in bed, dead to the world. But I wasn’t sane. Hoping to agree to something that made me physically ill to even think about, I’d driven all the way out here in the middle of the night.

  I’d accused Avery of being corrupted by the fame and the money, and yet here I was, ready to prove I wasn’t any better.

  With no answer after the second knock, I turned away from the door and started for the stairs. Just as my foot hit the last step, the hinges screeched open.

  “Roz?”

  My heart jumped, and I whirled around. “You’re up.”

  Avery stepped onto the porch, closing the door behind him. Though he was dressed in a pair of pajama pants and a hooded sweatshirt, he didn’t look as
though he’d rolled out of bed to answer my knock.

  “I’m on West Coast time,” he said, shrugging a shoulder. “Can’t sleep.”

  “Right.”

  “Are you here for Wes? He passed out hours ago, but—”

  “I’m not here for Wes.”

  Avery’s lip curved, and something in my belly stirred . . . butterflies.

  Shut it down, Roz. You are not allowed to feel that way. I couldn’t give him permission to affect me like that.

  I had to focus—pull myself together and concentrate on what’d brought me out here in the first place. Tonight, for the benefit of my entire family, Avery and I needed to have a rational conversation. And it had to go well. I had to be alert and on my game, which meant I couldn’t allow myself to be sucked into a whirlwind of emotion. Avery’s smile was enough to knock a girl off her feet, and I had to do my damnedest to be immune to his potent charm.

  The only Avery-antidote at my disposal was the reminder that I’d once trusted this guy. I’d admired his selflessness, and I’d aspired to achieve the same kind of goodness he’d always spread to everyone he encountered. I’d seen the goodness in him, and then he’d destroyed it. He let me down. That fact alone killed the flurry of wings in my stomach.

  Avery nodded over to the swing that hung at the corner of the wide porch, and the two of us walked over, keeping a considerable distance from one another. We took opposite sides of the seat, our weight shifting the seat into a back-and-forth motion. We drifted in silence for a few cold and quiet minutes, and then Avery’s eyes moved in my direction.

  I could feel his stare, but I didn’t dare look at him. He was studying my profile, as much as he possibly could in the dark.

  “I don’t know how to start.”

  “Take your time,” he said quietly, and I felt a twinge of affection at his gentle tone. The butterflies went crazy again.

  But what the hell? It’s not like I could help myself. I’d always loved his voice—the way each of his words were controlled and yet soft at the same time. There was an intimacy about the way he spoke, something that wasn’t honed or learned. It was a very natural part of who he was, and it made my toes curl.