by Vivian Lux
"Never mind. I'm sending you a picture." I tapped the screen and sent him the street sign. "Their place is on this street, next to a strip club."
My phone was silent for several moments. A truck screamed down the elevated highway above me just as an elevated train screeched to a stop. I was alone in the lot, but I felt the presence of a million lives going on around me. In the middle of this entire city, I was anonymous. It made me feel lonely until I remembered the one person in this whole city who had told me he loved me.
My phone lit up in a series of text messages.
"I love you."
"Goddamn"
"Holy shit, you're amazing."
"Damn girl."
"Are you safe?"
I looked around and typed back. "I think so."
"Where are you?"
"The Delaware river is right next to me."
"Okay take a picture of where you are and send it to me. I'm coming for you now. Stay put, stay hidden or something."
I looked around. there seemed to be some sort of health club a few hundred yards from me. A safely anonymous, banal place. "I'll be at the Rock Gym," I told him.
"I know it." My phone beeped immediately. "Go there."
******
Crash's jaw was working, the muscle under the skin jumping just below his ear. Other than that he was perfectly still, almost calm, as he maneuvered the pickup wildly through the streets of Philadelphia
I hadn't thought of it when we were on the bike because in my mind a bike was Crash's domain. He belonged there, without question he owned the road when he was astride his beautiful chrome beast. Behind the wheel of a pickup, though, was terribly normal, so normal that a disturbing thought flickered through my brain.
"Can I ask you something?" I said carefully, aware of my words cutting into the tense silence like a knife.
Crash grunted, his focus on a Mercedes in his blindspot. He revved the pickup's engine up to a scream and darted into a far too small space behind a semi that rumbled, echoing off of the high skyscrapers that closed in on us. Crash hadn't told me where we were going now, only told me to leave the bike and get in. I got the impression that he was making this all up as he went along.
He darted into another too small space and a horn blared at us. Crash casually lifted his middle finger. "Home sweet home," he growled. It was the first he had spoken since we started fighting this traffic. My stomach dropped down to my toes and I closed my eyes. It was better if I didn't know it when he killed us both.
"So, um, things are a bit tense now," I said drily, keeping my eyes closed. "A bit stressful." I hesitated. He was going to hate me for asking this. "So what should I do for you if you have a seizure?"
"I won't have one," he said flatly, taking that moment to leap out in front of the light and cut across traffic three lanes to the right. The sudden speed pinned me back against the seat and I was quite glad for the illusion of safety being in the pickup provided. Going that fast on a bike would be terrifying.
"You won't?" I squeaked, digging my nails into my thighs.
"No."
"How do you know?"
"Because I'm taking my meds again," he said, still deadly calm.
"Oh." I didn't know what to say.
He darted a quick glance at me. Then out of nowhere he closed his hand around mine. "I didn't have a reason to take them before," he said, keeping his eyes on the road. He squeezed my fingers, saying the rest with his touch.
He had a reason to now.
I leaned forward and looked out of the window. "Is this the hospital?
"Yup." He wrenched the wheel into the front entrance. A valet hopped out and Crash tossed him the keys.
"We're going to the hospital?" This wasn't what I was expecting.
Crash looked down at his phone and nodded. "Room 457," he said. "I need to see Doc."
Doc. He was taking me to see the man who I knew he thought of as a father.
*****
The first thing I saw was how fat Doc was. He was massive, his skin as tight as a sausage casing, more globe than man. His round, florid face and wide drinker's nose only added to that. His grizzled beard down to his chest was iron gray shot through with streaks of pure white. With his full sleeve tattoos and the snarl on his face, he looked just Santa Claus gone wrong.
Crash let go of my hand and rushed to the side of the bed. I expected him to grab his hand, touch him, but he just stood there, looking Doc up and down, taking it all in with a deadly calm expression.
Doc's eyelids fluttered and I couldn't help myself, I stepped back. He looked menacing even in spite of all of the tubes going into his body. When I saw him, I looked at Crash first. How was he taking this?
There was a strange ticking, jumping muscle along his cheek. His dark eyebrows twitched and narrowed, knitting his brow together.
"I look like shit, I know it," the huge man growled.
I heard Crash exhale. "You look like shit," he nodded, his voice choked.
Doc's eyes fluttered open. "That your chick?" he asked, then coughed, his voice reedy and raspy with effort. His throat sounded sore.
Crash didn't look at me, but I heard the pride in his voice. "Yup."
"She looks too good for you."
"She is." Crash stepped backwards. "Doc, I gotta take a piss."
"Thanks for sharing, dipshit," the big man sighed.
Crash walked back to me and brushed a kiss across my lips. "Stay here, okay?"
"Sure," I croaked.
I stood stock still, frozen to the spot. Doc made a pained expression and clicked something in his fist, and then relaxed. "You can sit down, honey," he wheezed, his voice much gentler. "I won't bite ya."
I looked behind me and lowered myself into the uncomfortable chair. "Sorry," I said reflexively.
"Don't be," he sighed. "I'd shake your hand, but I get why you wouldn't want to touch me."
I swallowed and collected myself. This man meant everything to Crash. I stood up and marshaled myself, then strode over to the bed and closed my hand over his, ignoring the tubes. "Ben didn't introduce me," I said firmly, looking into his bloodshot eyes. "I'm Gabi."
I felt Doc's fingers twitch under me. "Deck, Declan. But everyone just calls me Doc."
"How are you feeling, Doc?" I forced myself to hold my gaze steady.
He heaved a sigh. "Pissed, mostly," he grunted. "Worried too."
"Yeah." I looked down at my shoes, wiggling my toes a little. The bathroom was only down the hall; I had seen it when we came in. What the hell was taking Crash so long? "Yeah, I know Ben is worried too."
"He's who I'm most worried about," Doc croaked. "Kid's gonna do something stupid. I just know it."
It was in that moment that suddenly everything became clear to me. I whirled towards the door just as my phone vibrated with a text message in my pocket. "Oh fucking hell no," I cursed, scrabbling to grab it. "Oh you son of a bitch."
I read it and slowly lowered it to my side.
"What did he say?" Doc croaked.
I looked up at the ceiling. "That I'll be safe here." I turned and looked at the injured man, trying to keep the tears from spilling. "He left me here, Doc. He went to go avenge you or some kind of macho bullshit."
Doc closed his eyes in heavy sadness. "Fucking hell. He knows where they are?"
"I found them," I choked, shaking my head at my naiveté. "He knows exactly where to go."
"You found them?" Doc's eyes shot back open. "You know the hideout of the Los Lobos?"
"I think so, they were looking for a guy named Fernando."
"He's going to get his ass killed," Doc growled low. "Fucking hell, I'm all strapped down to this goddamn bed, can't even fucking walk and Ben is going to go on a fucking suicide mission. Fuck!" He roared and bells started dinging. I heard footsteps in the hallway, and felt the tears of panic slipping down my cheeks.
What do I do, what do I do?
I had helped Crash find the guys he was looking for without ever stoppin
g to consider what he would do next. I was in over my head, leading the man I loved straight to a bunch of violent criminals wanted by the police.
The police.
As the nurses flooded the room, shouting at me to step back as Doc raged and roared, I looked back down at my phone. The picture of the street sign was still saved in my text messages.
I could stop this.
I ducked out of the room and started dialing.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Crash
I lived in this city for six years. I had an apartment here, was considered a regular at a bunch of bars. I fucked a bunch of girls here and I joined a brotherhood.
Why did I feel like a stranger?
I hopped up and down in parking lot, feeling exposed as shit. This wasn't my neighborhood. I was in a part of the city that seemed wholly unfamiliar. Even the skyline seemed different up here. Seen from the wrong angle, it looked like a crude mockup of its actual self. It only made me feel more alien, more on edge.
Where the fuck were they?
I hopped up and down again, hoping to dispel some of the panicked energy. Landing on my bad leg like this hurt like hell, but I welcomed the pain. It hurt almost as bad as it did walking away and leaving Gabi in the hospital.
She had done right by me and I repaid her by dumping her off with Doc.
Doc.
I couldn't look at him one minute longer. I couldn't see the bloating, the swelling, the obvious pain he was in and not do something about it. I needed to get out of there and fucking fix it for him. Before I lost my shit.
Finally there was the far off sound of Harleys. I would recognize the sound of the guys anywhere. My heart leapt up into my throat and then splashed down into my stomach.
I wasn't so dumb as to just rush off and fuck up cartel members without back-up. Maybe before I met Gabi I would have done something so stupidly suicidal. But if there was any chance I was going to get out of this day alive, I wanted to take it.
Teach's dreads whipped in the gusting wind. The scar on his cheek was almost fully healed now, but it had twisted and tightened the skin of his cheek up into an evil, lopsided grin. I caught myself smiling hopefully back at him until I remembered that he wasn't actually happy to see me.
Case killed his engine first. The big fucker came striding up to my pickup and I planted my feet firmly on the ground. If he was going to hit me, let him get it out of his system, I didn't have time for this petty shit any more.
He loomed over me, utilizing all five inches of extra height to his advantage. "You had better be fucking right about this, traitor," he hissed. I saw his fists clench at his side, but he didn't lift them.
So it was going to be like that then. Fine, I could handle a little name-calling. "I'm right," I said evenly, though a little flicker of doubt flared in my head. What if Gabi was wrong? I was putting all my trust in my girl here. That she knew what she was talking about when she said she had found the hideout of the Los Lobos. What if she was wrong?
These assholes would most likely kill me on the spot.
I swallowed and tried to look completely confident. Cocky even. I could play cocky. "Where's my kiss?" I taunted him. "I missed you, big guy."
Case whirled around like he was ready to fuck me up, but Teach shouted at him to cut the shit. I shot Case a winning smile and he glowered at me. Serious motherfucker needed to pull the stick out of his ass.
"You got a piece?" Teach asked me. His Zen master's calm was ragged at the edges and I could tell he hadn't slept in fucking weeks.
"Nah," I said, looking down at my boots. I was about to say something about not wanting Gabi to see it but decided it was best not to tell them about her.
"Case, get him a Glock," Teach ordered. "Now all of you listen up."
Even the wind seemed to die down to listen to Teach. Old fucker just commanded that level of respect. "We're going in two waves," he said, his voice purposefully low so that we had to move in to hear him. I looked at the group of men on their bikes. Of course I recognized Case, Mac, J. and Teach, and I thought I saw a few Storm MC guys from the party that night. All told there were nine of us and I realized I had no idea how many Lobos we were up against. "Crash," Teach went on, and I felt myself snap to attention. "You know where this place is?"
I nodded, leaving out the part where I hadn't actually seen the place with my own eyes. My heartbeat started pounding everywhere but my chest. I could feel it in my fingertips, hear it in my ears. The stink of fear started to collect around me and I rocked back on my heels, certain the guys could smell it.
"Good," Teach nodded dismissively. "Bones, you're going in behind him. Case, you too. J., I want you in the rear watching the windows and roofs. You got it?"
"Got it," the three of them echoed and I was a little surprised to hear the military precision in their responses. Clearly five weeks in a safehouse had changed a few of the ways the Sons did things.
"Mac, you, Reese, Chief and me, we're gonna flank them from the west, coming up behind to run clean-up. "
"Got it, Teach," they replied and I was surprised to hear even Mac saying words out loud. Fuck, what had I missed?
The wind picked up again like it had been waiting for him to finish. I had to shout over the gusts. "It's three blocks dues west and one block south of here, the corner of F Street and Kingston. You're gonna see a strip club with a yellow sign. The house is in the lot right behind. Two entrances to the lot: one on F, one on Kingston. First wave, we're hitting from the front, coming in on F." I swallowed again then nodded.
Teach nodded back. "Proceed on foot. We don't want to give them any advance notice."
The nine of us all nodded, fingering our weapons. The sun was dipping lower in the sky. I wished we had the luxury of waiting for the cover of dark, but by now Fernando was sure to have gotten wind of our presence in the city. We couldn't risk him getting away and moving underground.
"Okay, let's fucking roll," Case bellowed.
"Wait," I shouted over the wind. The eight men looked at me. I saw anger, bewilderment, resentment and a whole lot of impatience. Well let them stew for a sec, this needed to be said. "For Doc," I yelled, raising my fist. My heart beat nearly out of my chest.
Teach looked at me and nodded, raising his own fist. "For Doc," he growled.
J. and Case nodded in turn, and Mac closed his palm over his heart. "For Doc," they all murmured, staring at the ground.
"Okay, now let's roll."
With every step I took, I saw the image of Doc in the hospital bed. It stretched and swam in front of my gaze so that I wasn't seeing the street around me. I was hurrying away, trying to get out from under the nightmare my traitor brain kept trying to show me, Seeing him strapped down, helpless in that bed, I felt like it was me. Me again. Lying for days, and weeks, the frustration, the pain, the boredom, all of the crazy psychotic feelings came roaring back, louder than the blood in my ears. I rushed forward; practically sprinting down the windblown streets, ready to fuck up the people who did this, the ones who brought my past crashing back down around my ears. I heard shouts, sirens, the noise of the city around me, but nothing was strong enough to drown out the pain. I heard a shout and realized it was my own voice as I grabbed my Glock from my waistband ready to turn the corner and rain hellfire down on each and every Los Lobos fucker...
There was another shout and something slammed into me.
I fell hard, slamming my face against the pavement, screaming and cursing.
"Fucking shut up!" A hand clapped around my mouth. I raged and lifted my gun.
J. appeared above me and smacked it away. "Crash, shut up! Look!"
From his position on top of me, Case grabbed my head and wrenched it to the side, forcing me to see the street ahead of us.
The cop cars closed off a perimeter of about one hundred feet around the strip club, guns drawn. I watched, bewildered, as three heavily armored officers kicked down the door to the house in the rear, shouting for Fernando to put his goddam
n hands up.
"Holeeeee shiiit," J. exhaled.
"I almost walked into that," I realized.
"Ran into it," Case corrected me. He pushed himself off of me and held out his hand. Gingerly, I reached out and clasped it, and he hauled me to my feet.
"Let's get the hell out of here before someone makes connections?" Bones suggested, sounded almost disappointed.
But I couldn't stop watching. There were other people milling about on the street, taking in the drama as the police hauled guys out of the house, throwing them on the ground and cuffing them. It was fucking surreal. How the hell had this happened?
My phone vibrated in my pocket and suddenly I understood. With a mixture of confusion and awe, I picked it up.
"Baby?"
"You alive?" Gabi sounded both worried and pissed.
"I'm alive," I nodded. "Seems like the cops beat me to the punch somehow."
"Yeah, somehow," she snorted. "You're an idiot and an asshole, could you come fucking get me now?'
"Yeah," I exhaled. She had saved me, she had saved all of us from a battle that would have cost us everything. "Yeah, I am an asshole, aren't I?"
"You are, but I love you anyway. Stop off and get me and Doc something to eat, the food here is terrible and he wants a burger," she muffled the phone. "How do you want it?" I heard her ask Doc.
"Don't worry, I know, rare," I agreed, backing away from the drama on the street. It was funny how as soon as I heard her voice, I wasn't even interested in it any more. Teach and the other guys were meeting up with us, and we all started melting back into the shadows, unnoticed by both the Lobos and the cops.
It was over. But me and Gabi, we were just beginning.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Gabriela
Doc was absolutely right, this place was a shithole.
I hung back and watched as the guys Crash had introduced me to gathered their things and threw them in the back of Crash's pick up. It was dark, darker than I thought New Jersey was capable of getting, and the safehouse squatted in the middle of a muddy field, looking almost forlorn as everyone abandoned it as fast as they could.
