Crazy 4U

by Cach, Lisa

  “As long as the client approves.”

  She cast a sly look at him over her shoulder. “I make them think it’s their idea.”

  He laughed. They explored the park for a while, Kelsey explaining the design philosophies that made some areas successful and others less so. She was fluent and uninhibited when discussing landscape design, and nothing like the borderline freak who’d made the awkward penis joke that first day. He was finding to his surprise that he liked her.

  “That guy you were out with last night, was he the one Bridget set you up with?” he asked, feeling bad now for the uncharitable thoughts he’d once had about the poor sod who’d been stuck going out with her.

  “Yes, Mark. It was our first date.”

  He winced. “I screwed that up for you, didn’t I?”

  She shrugged one shoulder. “Not really. I lied through my teeth: I said you were an old family friend with whom I used to wrestle, and that you were a big enough jerk to still think it was funny as an adult. He seemed to buy it.”

  He’d noticed the toad giving him patronizing looks through the remainder of the meal. “Do I look like I could be that big an asshole?”

  “You think the truth was better?”

  “Touché, ma chère. Is there going to be a second date?”

  “I don’t know yet.”

  “He’d be a fool not to ask you.”

  She glanced at him, but said nothing.

  “When you saw me following you to the restrooms, why did you run?”

  She scowled. “I didn’t run.”

  “Not technically, but you did hide. You didn’t want me to see you.”

  “So?”

  “I’m just curious.”

  “I… I was embarrassed. It was a blind date, you’re a client— I don’t know! I was surprised to see you, and I got flustered.”

  He nodded, thinking he understood. “The collision of private life and work life.”

  She nodded quickly. “Yes.”

  “Well, I hope it works out for you with the guy. If that’s what you want.”

  She cocked her head. “Do you think I shouldn’t want it?”

  “He seemed quick to abandon you to the ruffian by the ladies’ room.”

  “We were in a public place, with people constantly coming and going,” she said defensively. “You couldn’t have hurt me. There was no danger.”

  Walking alone with her in a secluded park was not the time to point out what harm a man could do to a woman in the space of a few minutes. “I’m just saying, a bit of bravado has its place now and then.”

  “Can I ask you a question?” Kelsey asked.

  “Sure.”

  “Who’s the ‘amazing’ redhead you were looking for?”

  He let out a breath. “I don’t know. A dream? I’d wonder if I imagined the whole thing if my friend Richard hadn’t met her, too.”

  “You only met her once?”

  “A few weeks ago, at a club.” He gave her a bowdlerized version of the story.

  “So what’s so special about her, other than being beautiful?”

  “Heck if I know. I don’t think we ever do know why we fall for one person and not another.”

  “Sometimes it’s pretty clear. I think looks have a lot to do with it.”

  He shook his head. “There were other beautiful women at the club. Hell, I’ve met hundreds of beautiful women. But there was something about her, something about her smile, and the look in her eyes. And the way she moved – it was like her whole body was saying yes! to everything that is joyful in life.”

  Kelsey plucked a leaf off a shrub and shredded it. “Maybe she was just a dream. You can’t say yes to everything good in life, all the time. You’d never get anything done. You’d never become anyone.”

  “But wouldn’t it be beautiful if you could live that way?”

  Kelsey looked up at him with her small black eyes. “Maybe, once in a while.” A smile crept shyly onto her lips. “I might enjoy it.”

  The moment stretched between them, pulled by a glimmering sexual tension. They were alone at the edge of a pond, large shrubs sheltering them to either side. His body stirred, aware of her closeness, and he remembered the sleek column of her neck with the strand of red hair lying against it. She swayed almost imperceptibly towards him and the urge to kiss her rose in his blood.

  He cleared his throat and stepped back, seeking firm ground. Their working relationship made a kiss a huge mistake. And this was Kelsey. He had no wish to be romantically involved with her.

  She blinked and looked away. “I’ve been thinking about Step Two for how you can find peace in your garden,” she said, her voice starting at a squeak but reaching normal level by the end.

  “I already failed Step One: Turn off the cell phone,” he said, his own voice cracking. He’d almost kissed her. He’d almost kissed her. Jesus Christ.

  “You’ll get there. Step Two might help you.”

  They moved away from the pond, and the dangers of seclusion. “Okay, Zen Mistress. What’s Step Two?”

  “Grasshopper,” she said in a Kung-fu movie voice, “to know peace in your garden, you must work in your garden.”

  “I don’t like the sounds of that.”

  She grinned. “Think of it this way: you won’t need your gym membership anymore.”

  “You look harmless, but you aren’t, are you?”

  Her grin widened. “You have no idea.”

  Chapter Nine

  Kelsey knelt on the floor and pulled the metal box out from the back of her closet. It had been four weeks since she and Jack had gone to Kubota Garden and come so close to a kiss, and for four weeks she had been waiting for that almost-kiss to become real.

  Every few days she dragged the box out and stared at its closed lid, wanting to open it and fearing to at the same time.

  Jack had starting working with her and Bridget in the garden, sometimes early in the morning, sometimes in the late afternoon, and other times not at all as he left town for work. When he was there, though, he worked at whatever job she set for him, never complaining but often asking questions. He chatted easily with them both, and when Bridget wasn’t near he let the conversation with Kelsey verge nearer on the personal. He often asked her how things were going with Mark, and she hated to answer. Every date with Mark, every marker of it being a relationship made it less likely that Jack would cross the line from friend to lover.

  She could have Jack if she wore the shoes. Without them, it was a schoolgirl fantasy.

  Mark was reality.

  The phone rang.

  “Hi Kelsey, it’s Mark.”

  Speak of the devil. “Hi. I think I recognize your voice by now, silly,” she said. They’d been seeing each other about twice a week for a month: dinners out had progressed to dinners and rented movies at Mark’s, and a few make-out sessions on his couch that hadn’t yet led to him touching her anywhere below the waist. She let him set the pace for the relationship, but was a little puzzled that it was going as slowly as it was. Didn’t he want to have sex with her? She had felt his erection hard under the zipper of his jeans, but he hadn’t yet unleashed the demon.

  Either he was a bit old-fashioned, or there was something wrong with his penis. She hoped it was the former. She was becoming fond of Mark, and from some things he’d hinted at about the future – talk of flying back to Wisconsin to meet his family, asking her if she wanted kids, and when – she guessed his own feelings for her were strong.

  “Are you free next Friday night?” he asked, sounding a bit nervous.

  “Yeah. What’s up?”

  “Nothing, I just want to take you out to dinner.”

  “Oh. Okay. Or I could make you dinner here; I’d like that.”

  “No, I want to treat you to a nice dinner, somewhere special. I… I want to talk about our future.”

  “Oh!” Good lord, was he telling her he wanted to propose? “All right. I’ll find something nice to wear.”

  “Don’
t buy anything new; just come as you usually are.”

  “Okay.” That was kind of sweet: He wanted her as she was. “Do you want to do anything this weekend?”

  “I, uh, I’ve got some things I have to take care of,” Mark said.

  “Oh. Okay.” Was he going ring shopping?

  “But I’ll see you next Friday. I’ll pick you up at eight.”

  “Okay.”

  “Have a great week,” he said.

  “You too.”

  She hung up feeling strangely flat, and a bit anxious.

  Shouldn’t she be giddy?

  Instead, she felt a vague but growing pressure. She didn’t love him. She might someday grow to love him; she could imagine them being compatible, and building a life together despite a few petty annoyances and disappointments. She did mostly enjoy the time they spent together, and even more, she enjoyed the physical affection.

  If he declared his devotion to her, she was either going to have to be honest and hurt him with her lukewarm response, or she would have to lie and commit herself to him.

  She sat on the floor and pulled the box between her outstretched legs. There was only two weeks of work left at Jack’s house and then she’d move on to her next project. No more working with him by her side, chatting, laughing, every moment pregnant with possibility in her mind, but obviously not in his.

  Next Friday Mark might propose, and she might give him a tentative yes. If she did, then she would never again don the shoes. She knew it was morally wrong even to do so now, but she couldn’t make herself care. Her lust for Jack was her secret, her private passion, separate from anything to do with Mark. She would indulge it and expunge it at her will.

  Tonight was Friday. Jack had mentioned that all day Thursday through Saturday, until 10:00 P.M., he’d be at a gamer’s convention downtown. His company had given him a suite in a hotel nearby.

  Perhaps Rosa had a game she wanted to play on Saturday.

  Kelsey put her hand on the lid, imagining she could feel the power of the shoes within.

  “Who’s your goddess?” Shoestra whispered naughtily in Kelsey’s mind.

  “I am,” Kelsey said, and opened the box.

  Chapter Ten

  “I swear Kelsey, I’m beginning to wonder if you’re not bipolar. You’ve got a weird light in your eye,” Holly said, glancing away from the road for a moment.

  “I’m not manic. It’s these shoes: They make me feel sexy. They make me feel like Rrrrr-osa,” Kelsey said, rolling the R. “Rrrr-osa Rrrr-ugosa.”

  Holly snorted. “I don’t know why Rosa wants to spend Saturday night at a gamer’s convention.”

  “Because of all the es-sexy men who like to play games,” Kelsey said in her best Latina accent.

  Holly choked. “You’re going to make me pee my pants.” She pulled over to the curb near the entrance to the convention center, looking worriedly out the windshield at the twilit sky. Although it was almost nine thirty, the long spring day still held a trace of light. “So your friend Carol and her husband are meeting you inside?”

  Kelsey nodded, unhappy with the lie but unwilling to tell the truth. Holly seemed to like Mark, and to think Kelsey had a possible future with him. Seducing another man didn’t fit into that vision.

  “Don’t wait up for me; we might end up staying in a hotel.” She’d timed her arrival to the end of the convention day, hoping there would be nothing to stop Jack from spiriting her away.

  “Okay. Call if you need me.”

  “Thanks, Hol.” Kelsey felt a warm burbling of love for her protective sister. She leaned over and kissed her cheek. “You’re too good to me. I love you, you know.”

  “Monday morning, it’s off to the shrink with you. But I love you, too.”

  Kelsey grinned and got out. “Thanks for the ride.”

  As Holly drove off, Kelsey straightened her tight Chinese dress. It was peach silk brocade with a delicate design of white chrysanthemums with green stems. It traced her body from its mandarin collar to the hem at her ankles. A slit to mid-thigh on either side made it possible to walk. Erica had again worked her magic on Kelsey’s hair and make-up, transforming her from bland landscaper to femme fatale.

  Or in the case of this convention, transforming her to the living incarnation of every male gamer’s video fantasy. The shoes told her it was true, and the gaping jaws of men as she strutted into the convention hall were confirmation.

  “Ready shoes?” she said under her breath as she stopped to survey the hundreds of booths arrayed in aisles. “Find Jack.”

  She pivoted right and started walking. The shoes took her deep into the convention hall, moving her like she knew where she was going and wasn’t going to let anyone stop her. Men and women seemed to sense her approach, turning and gawking, then falling back to make way.

  “Who is that?” people whispered.

  “She’s that actress from what’s-it, isn’t she?”

  “No, she’s the model they used for Sex Vixen III.”

  Kelsey made eye contact and smiled as she glided by. Tonight I say yes to everything that brings joy. Tonight I say yes to Jack.

  It was with that thought fresh upon her that the last of the crowd parted, leaving him standing alone in the center of the aisle, his back to her.

  She stopped a dozen feet away. The crowd around them quieted, not sure what was happening or even why they themselves seemed to be playing a role.

  Jack slowly turned, as if sensing a tiger behind him. “Rosa,” he breathed, as if not believing his eyes.

  She walked slowly towards him, feeling her desire for him in every pulse of her blood.

  He dropped the paper cup of water he was holding. It splashed and rolled aside, ignored.

  She came face to face with him, her body only inches away, and leaned forward until her mouth was beside his ear. “I’ve been waiting so very long for you,” she whispered. “I can’t bear it.” She heard him swallow, and felt his quickened breath on her hair. “Make love to me, Jack.”

  “You ran away last time,” he rasped.

  She leaned in the last few inches until her body touched his. “I didn’t know what I wanted. I was frightened.”

  “But you know now?”

  “I’ve thought of you every day since.” Her hips pressing against his, she draped her arms around his neck and leaned her upper body back so she could see his face. She met his eyes and slowly raised her lips to his. When her lips brushed his, his control finally broke. His arms went around her and he crushed her to him, his mouth bruisingly hard on her own. He bent her backwards until she was barely on her toes, her arms clinging to him for support. Around them the crowd roared approval, women clapping and men whistling.

  Jack broke the kiss and with his arm around her waist half-ran with her towards the exit. When that was too slow, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her. “You don’t have to stay and work?” she asked.

  “You think I should trade another half hour with these guys,” he said, nodding towards a couple gaping techies in a booth they were passing, “for you?”

  “Hell, no!” the techies answered for him.

  Kelsey blew them a kiss over Jack’s shoulder.

  He put her back on her feet when they got outside and with her hand firmly in his he pulled her a block and a half to a hotel. “I have a room,” he said as they went through the revolving doors. They were the first words he’d spoken since their kiss, but the hovering disbelief in his eyes and his death-grip on her hand both loudly said that he did not trust she would not disappear if he should let go of her for so much as an instant.

  Kelsey let herself float on the current of his grasping passion, feeling a deep thrill in the possession of his hold on her. She was giving herself over to his will and wanted him to do anything and everything he wished to her.

  They reached the suite and Jack put the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on the door and bolted it. Kelsey stood in the doorway to the bedroom, watching him, waiting with a tremble
in her belly for him to come over her like a storm and sweep her onto the bed behind her. She wanted the thundering rain of his desire to pour upon her until she was aware of nothing in the world but Jack.

  Instead, he stopped a few feet from her. Joy struggled with distrust in his eyes. “How did you know where I was?”

  “I talked to someone who knows you.”

  “Who?”

  She shook her head. “It was a voice in passing.” It was my other self; the self you cannot see even though she’s right before your eyes.

  He took a step closer. “You vanish and appear as if out of nothing. Surprises aren’t easy on a man.”

  She wet her lips, the trembling moving into her limbs, afraid now that it was anger moving through him as much as lust. “Not even the good surprises?”

  “I don’t like it when I don’t understand what’s happening,” he said, taking another step closer. “I want to get to the bottom of it.”

  “You’ll destroy the mystery.”

  “You can’t hold onto a mystery.”

  “You can hold onto me, Jack. I’m right here. You can trust in my body beneath your hands, can’t you?” She undid the silk frogs that ran from her neck to her arm and let the fabric fall from her shoulder. “There’s nothing more real than that.”

  He closed the distance between them and lifted his hands to her face, holding them to either side without touching her, as if framing a vision. “Why do I feel that I know you so well, when we’re all but strangers?” he asked hoarsely. “How do you do this to me?”

  “It’s because you are all that I want in this world.”

  His fingertips touched the sides of her face and she felt his own trembling.

  “Say yes to me, Jack,” she breathed, the words less than a whisper. She tilted her face towards his, her lips parted. “Say yes.”

  “Yes.” His mouth came down on hers, his arms around her waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he lifted her off the ground, her hips pressed against his, and walked her back to the bed. He lifted her onto it, laying her on her back atop the sheets that had already been turned down. He grabbed the chocolate on the pillow and tossed it aside.