Half Past The Apocalypse

by Joe Kelly

  Shelly had sat down one night and figured out a way to connect the remote buttons to their off hand gloves, so now they only needed to move a thumb to touch and send a message.

  The sound was drawing closer and it was more than one vehicle. If that was Jared and the scavengers, then either something had gone wrong or they had scored some really good stuff to come back this early.

  Finally, a truck appeared from around the bend of the road, pulling a battered and scorched fifth wheel travel trailer, a RV followed then a Subaru and two more vehicles. Steve shifted the binoculars back to the truck in the lead and focused on the cab. I be damned he thought as a real smile spread across his face. Jared is going to love this, he told himself “We have company and its friendly.”

  ♦ ♦ ♦

  Jared stopped his truck in the overgrown lawn, and slid out as Ronny pulled along side. His right hand resting on the grip of his Colt Commando as he studied the two-story log home. It sat on a low hill, a bump really, in the middle of an over grown pasture. Behind it lay the wood line the national forest boundary was only two hundred yards into the woods. The couples vehicles were not visible but they could have been parked around back.

  This was the sixth, and last, home on their list to search and clear for today. He had been half tempted to put this one off till tomorrow but wasting fuel for a second trip out here was not something he was going to do.

  There was no sign of the dead out here which was a good thing. He suspected it was because there was so much space out here that the undead were spread out to thin but even if they showed up, as slow as they were he and his group would have plenty of time to get away before a horde could surround them or so he told himself. Private Murphy had a nasty habit of messing with one Jared Stone whenever he was bored.

  So far today they had seen few undead, the largest group had been seven. Which was one of the reasons he was staying far away from town to do his scavenging, that and most of the people out here had almost everything the group could use.

  The poorer folks had root cellars full of self canned foods, most of them had ammo as well and then of course tractors, tools of all kinds and some even had construction equipment like bulldozers and the the upscale, AKA rich folks, had left behind even less food than the poor but in every home and barn they owned were all kinds of surprises that only the well off could have afforded it was worth the risk of drawing the attention of the dead for the stuff they had located. As long as we keep the noise levels down and don’t loiter any more than necessary we should be fine.

  As he tied his shemagh on Jill climbed carefully out of the truck having pulled a muscle in her calf when she had taken a tumble down a rickety basement stair case at the last house they had cleared. “Don’t see anything from here” Jill said, lowering the scope she had used to look thru the windows. She gave him a curious look then shrugged, how he dressed was none of her business.

  Today she was back in her black biker leathers and motocross armor which probably provided far more protection than Jared’s combat harness, long sleeved shirt and jeans did. Pistols and a combat knife rode her hips. She carried a crossbow with confidence now and had been practicing daily for months now with the crossbow and had become a pretty good shot over all, actually she’s better than I am with one.

  “It’s got a basement “Jared informed her. “You could have mentioned that little fact when we were planning this” she said wincing at the memory of the last basement.

  “Just remembered it” He replied. He didn’t blame her for her reaction. It wasn’t just the about the tumble she had taken down the stairs in the last one. Basements tended to be the most nerve racking places to clear and just creepier than all hell that and like everyone else the constant stress was eating at her. He forced himself to give her a reassuring smile. “last one then its back home.” He told her.

  The Log home was or had been a 1.5 million dollar home placed on several wooded acres. Jared had been inside twice a few years back the second time had been when he had come over to talk to Robert Burton the owner about a four-wheeler Robert had up for sale.

  Roberts’s wife, Sheila had been standoffish at best and not exactly the most likeable person he had ever met. Personally, Jared had gotten the impression that she was a gold digger pure and simple. But the interior decorator she had hired had really made the house shine so at least she had taste in decorators.

  From here the Large metal garage/barn rose above the low hill the house sat on. He knew from his trips here that the barn had a large attached workshop full of wood and metal working tools and equipment. Robert had retired back in 2004 and that workshop had been the place he spent most of his time when he wasn’t working with the four horses they couple had owned.

  I wonder what happened to the horse’s, Jared thought. they were no were in sight. If Robert and Sheila are dead and their horse’s were probably dead too.

  The work shop was the real reason they were here, anything else they found would only be icing on the cake but those tools where worth their weight in gold. Assuming of course that Robert and his wife weren’t alive and well in the house. If they were Jared was prepared to wheel and deal to get those tools and get the couple to come back to the camp with them.

  Another reason for the visit was the house like so many others was far from town and less likely to have been picked clean in the last days of the world. It should hopefully still have food and supplies they could use. Even a small quantity was better than none.

  “Me and Mark will check out the Barn, or garage or whatever the hell that huge ass thing is back there,” Ronny said motioning to Mark to follow him around back.

  “Jared, next time you get to go with Mighty Mouth while I clear the house with Jill.” Mark said with a mock leer at Jill.

  “What would Sharon say?” Jill asked trying to sound amused.

  “She would join us.” Mark replied instantly.

  “As a Chaperone” Ronny interjected. “now lets move you curly headed bastard step child or do you want me to tell Sharon about that little place in Munchen you liked to visit.”

  “I hate you.” Mark said surprising them all with a laugh.

  Ronny gave a casual yet jaunty wave to Mary as he and Mark walked away weapons at low ready.

  “I got guard duty,” Mary said as she climbed into the back of the truck with her rifle. She would rather have gone with Ronny but some one had to stand watch and this way she gave Jill time to be alone with Jared and hopefully the dimwit would figure out that Jill really liked him and finally do something about it. Back at his house he had shown a lot of interest in Jill but once they had reached the camp something had changed and while he was still friendly to her, he kept his distance, emotionally, at any rate.

  Trying to set those two up kept Mary’s mind from dwelling to much on how bad things really were.

  “Have I told you, how fetching you look in that dress, I have to say that those combat boots and Ammo bandolier really set it off” Jared said with a grin, more to relieve the tension and pre entry jitters than any real attempt at humor. He had been doing that a lot pretending to be far more calm and relaxed than he felt it was either that or watch his friends slide into deep depression and eventually give up.

  “Ronny likes it, especially when I wear that little white shirt and short plaid skirt with my boots.” Mary replied with a matching grin. She knew the game and was more than willing to play along and sometimes he almost got her to believe she was actually in a good mood.

  Jared chuckled and then started across the lawn his expression smoothing into serious concentration. Halfway to the house he stopped as he heard a buzzing rattling noise, Jill started to step past him without thinking he slapped hand across her chest to stop her only to blush as he realized exactly what his hand was now resting on.

  “Um… stop rattle snake” he said reluctantly but quickly removing his hand. What a time to get all hot and bothered he thought dryly, Out of the corner of his eye , he saw Mary i
n the back of the truck smirking at him. Sometimes I really hate her, he thought rolling his eyes.

  Drawing his pistol, he studied the ground ahead of them intently. Finally spotting the Rattlesnake about six feet away from them coiled up in some thick weeds. “Back up and to the right slowly” he said. He waited till Jill had stepped far enough back that there was no way the snake could strike her then fired twice, hitting the snake both times.

  The snake began to flip around mindlessly as Jared stepped forward and slammed a boot on its head and then drew his Khukri and cut off its head. Most people had no clue that a dead snake could still bite and poison a person and or bite itself ruining the meat. He wasn’t going to risk either, Snake, rattlesnake especially was good eating.

  “Oooh god I hate snakes” Jill said looking at the snake with a shudder. She had no problems with blood, Spiders, or much of anything else, but snakes set off her gross out meter like nothing else. Well outside of giant cockroaches that hissed and flew.

  “Ever eaten rattle snake,” Jared asked quietly his eyes sweeping the distant woodline at the edge of the fields.

  “No and I don’t plan on it either. But let me guess it tastes like chicken” She replied. Uneasy at being out in the open.

  “actually, it’s the only thing I’ve ever found that does, outside of chicken. But sometimes chicken doesn’t even taste like chicken.” Jared said as he picked the snake’s body up and carried it over to toss into the bed of his truck.

  “Keep an eye on the that.” He said grinning in response to the glare Mary gave him as she climbed up onto the top of the cab to get away from the dead snake. “No problem, I’ll just do it from up here” she replied giving him the bird refusing to scream or act girly and give the red headed Asshole the satisfaction.

  “does anything really bother you” Jill asked as they started towards the house.

  “Yes” Jared replied. “lots of things do, I just don’t usually mention it and I deal with it if it happens.”

  “Like Clowns” She asked, his friends often talked about his dislike of clowns. Of course the word dislike was always in air quotes.

  He stopped and turned to face her and for a moment she thought she had stepped over a line with him. His eyes swept the area around them then satisfied there was no threat he gave her a smile, a real smile even if there was a haunted quality to it. “One day I might tell you the story okay. But for right now, lets get our heads in the game and get this done.”

  He turned back to the house his weapon up and ready. Jill followed closely as he crossed the yard and circled the house twice looking in windows and knocking on the walls trying to draw either Roberts attention or that of any undead that might be inside. Finally, he moved to the front door and found it was locked. “Good sign” He muttered though he knew it meant nothing really.

  “How so, they could have locked themselves in and died” Jill pointed out echoing his thoughts, as she readied her pistol. He resisted the urge to call Ronnie on the radio and see if there was a truck and a Mercedes parked in the garage it wouldn’t matter either way. If Robert was still alive He was going to find out in a few minutes and the same if Robert and his wife were dead. Well Sorta dead at any rate.

  He broke out a pane in the window next to the door and reached in to unlock it. Jill hissed between her teeth as she realized how stupid that move really was. He pulled his hand back and grinned. “Nothing there, I checked the floor thru the window before I broke it” he said smiling. “But thanks for the concern.”

  “I was only concerned with wasting an extra bullet if I had to put you down as well as a zombie.” Jill replied smiling weakly as Jared opened the door and stepped inside his weapon up.

  The living room was huge and done with tasteful southwest style décor. A staircase led up to the master bedroom loft and home office. A 62-inch flat screen dominated one wall. “Nice” Jill said as she noted the fireplace, and its custom mantle.

  “Very nice” Jared said eyeing the flat screen. “We need to take that with us.” She gave him a puzzled look.

  “How are we going to haul off a fireplace?” she asked. “What fireplace, I was talking about the TV. Ori would kill to watch porn on that thing,” Jared replied amused at the situation.

  Jill turned towards the arch and then stumbled back with a sharp intake of breath. Jared instinctively spun around at the sound cursing silently at having dropped his normal rules about silence when clearing a home not to mention letting his attention drift.

  Sheila had been a damned attractive woman in life with damn near Barbie proportions. Jared had suspected a plastic surgeon had helped with at least two aspects of her appearance. In undeath she was still stunning, but in a very different way. She must have been in the kitchen when they entered and he had gotten stupidly distracted.

  It was pure training reflex that brought his rifle up and snugged against his shoulder, he fired three times. Jill fired almost at the same time. Five bullets smashed into the former beauty, her head vanished in a red haze spraying across the Navajo blanket on the wall behind her. He shuddered, feeling a bit of horror, he was so sick of doing this. Get a grip son, he told himself.

  “Damn I hate those things, they are too damn quiet.” He said. He shook his head in disgust at himself looking around to make sure Robert wasn’t sneaking up on them. Then realized Jill was still looking into the kitchen doorway, with an intensity that set his skin to prickling. “What is it?” He asked.

  She blinked slowly the look of dread passing. “It… sorry I thought I saw something else in the kitchen, just before the Big boobed undead Trophy wife attacked.” Jill told him

  “Something else?” Jared asked, puzzled. “Let me look, ” he said starting forward. She reached out and gripped his shoulder hard. “ No.. Hang on for a second, okay. Give me a moment.”

  Now he was really puzzled, this was totally unlike her. She was shaken and scared worse than the first Day of the end of the world. He glanced back to the stairs to make sure nothing was there then focused on Jill.

  “What kind of something?” he asked quietly his eyes sweeping the area for any threat, what he should have been doing the moment he stepped from the truck.

  “I guess it was a shadow, for a moment I thought it was another zombie, and then of course undead trophy wife stepped out the door, but I saw it behind her. Then it…. I guess it was just a trick of the light” she said wondering if it sounded as lame to Jared as it did to her. She wasn’t about to tell Jared what she had thought she had seen, not unless she wanted to be treated like a nut case.

  They stood there for a few minutes till she got herself under control then she motioned for Jared to lead the way into the kitchen where sunlight fell through tall blood smeared panes. Shelia must have spent a fortune on the once elegant kitchen, filled with the most expensive top line appliances that could be bought when civilization had still lived and breathed.

  Jared doubted sheila would have approved of the new look, best described as bathed in blood. On the floor behind the kitchen island, he found what was left of Robert who lay in large dried pool of blood his head had been ripped off and lay on the floor staring sightlessly at the wall. One side of the skull looked like it had been crushed in a fall or stepped on maybe.

  Sheila or some other undead had really done a number on old Robert who had, Jared remembered, been a good man who had deserved better.

  Even if the head had been attached to the body and intact there wasn’t a whole lot to animate anyway. Robert had been reduced to shreds of flesh clinging to a skeleton, Actually Jared thought after a moment of gazing at the scene, there had to have been a lot more than one or two zombies to do that kind of damage. They usually stopped feeding the moment the body died. So that meant that a whole lot of undead had been tearing him apart at the same time. Jared shivered as cold fingers of horror rippled up his spine while his imagination created a mental movie of Roberts last moments of life.

  On full alert now he led the way down in
to the basement, ten minutes later he had found nothing but clothes and cobwebs. The rest of the house was just as empty. It wasn’t till later he started wondering, if there had been more zombies than just Sheila, how did they get out of the house and lock the doors behind them and what had happened to the couple’s vehicles.

  “You really need to come out here and look at this” Ronnie said over the radio just as Jared finished searching the last room. He sounded pretty excited to Jared. “Be there in a couple of minutes.” Jared replied as he stuffed the few things he was taking into a bag then he and Jill made their way quickly out the back door and across the overgrown lawn towards the tree shaded large barn/garage. For a moment it was felt and looked like a normal day, with a light wind stirring the hemlock and oak tree limbs under a deep blue sky. The only thing missing was a hawk circling lazily overhead while bees droned.

  Stepping thru the double doors into the dim interior, of the barn, it felt instantly cooler. Tools and equipment had been stacked by the door ready to be loaded onto the trailer they had found behind the barn. Ronny stood by a long blue bag examining a contraption that sat beside the bag.