The Other Side of Heaven

by Stan Mason

  ‘It’s awful,’ she bleated miserably. ‘How could anyone ever allow such a thing to happen?’

  ‘They do so because they’re mean and merciless,’ I stated curtly. ‘They have no conscience in Heaven. All they’re interested in is the rules.

  ‘I’ve got to get out of here somehow,’ cried the female spirit, obviously suffering from a bout of claustrophobia. ‘It’s too tense... too stifling!’

  ‘Calm yourself,’ I told her, even though I knew my words would not be helpful. ‘There’s no point in fretting.’

  ‘How did I ever get into this mess,’ she bleated. ‘I didn’t know it was so hard to exist after death.’

  ‘There was an ex-New York gangster in here that I managed to save,’ I went on. ‘I did it with the help of the Cosmic Joker.’

  ‘Who the hell is he?’ she enquired fiercely, fearing that she might have to face another monster.

  ‘Oh he’s not too bad,’ I said, quelling her fears, ‘except that he causes chaos to the people on Earth every day. But he’s proved to be a good friend to me. In face, come to think of it, he’s the only spirit I know who’s evil in Hell.’

  ‘How did he get this other spirit out of this hell-hole?’ she asked with an element of hope in her voice.

  ‘The spirit in her had been a very bad criminal in his life. He killed many people. I still can’t understand why they held him here in Heaven. I mean he had all the qualifications to go to Hell. No... I simply helped him on his way. By now, he’s either in a writing group, singing in a choir, attending art classes, or doing gymnastics in preparation for the competitive games.’

  ‘You’re kidding!’ she retorted in disbelief.

  ‘Not at all,’ I responded easily. ‘You see Hell’s not what you think it is. It’s a place where evil people are turned into decent spirits. It has nothing to do with those ideas and images you saw about it when you were alive. The difference between Heaven and Hell is that Heaven follows rigid rules where as in Hell everything is laissez-faire.’

  ‘Tell me how to get to Hell,’ she advanced instinctively.

  ‘It’s too late for you now. You need to be evil, vicious ... in other words a criminal in your past life to be afforded entry.’

  ‘Now you tell me!’ she grunted unhappily. ‘If only I could go back... ’

  ‘If only!’ I interrupted swiftly. ‘Hindsight’s a wonderful thing. The only problem is that you can’t do anything to change the past.’

  ‘Can you get the Cosmic Joker back?’ she enquired expecting a negative answer.

  ‘I wouldn’t know how,’ I confessed sadly. ‘In any case, I don’t think he would help me with your situation. Your life was not criminal enough to got to Hell. Unfortunately, I’m in exactly the same position.’

  ‘I don’t want to wait around for that awful Soul Gatherer to come back for me,’ she said fearfully.

  ‘Well I thought I was gone until he took the Frenchman,’ I admitted. ‘I think I’m here on borrowed time.’

  I stared at the female spirit lovingly trying not to think of my old paramour, Jeannette Dubois. I would have loved to have helped her in this predicament but I found myself impotent to be able to do so. I doubted whether it was possible to contact the Cosmic Joker from Heaven as he was always found in the other realm... except on the Desert of Ice which seemed to be shared by both Heaven and Hell. And there was no means by which I could contact my fellow spirit with no name. They were both in the other realm from which I was incarcerated. Subsequently, there was nothing I could do to help my fellow female spirit. Even more so, there was nothing I could do for myself.

  The sound of thunder could be heard in the far distance again. However, on this occasion, much to our relief, it faded away fairly swiftly into infinity. It was not the time for either of us to become dead souls.

  I turned to the female spirit to continue our conversation. ‘You and I are special spirits,’ I conveyed to her.

  ‘How do you come by that view?’ she asked meekly.

  ‘Anyone who doesn’t fit in here is usually reincarnated at an early stage and sent back to Earth to be reborn again. The rest of the spirits in Heaven are relatively docile. Very much so, I would say. The gave in on their arrival in Purgatory expiating their sins immediately. We’re different. We refuse to show remorse on the grounds that we’ve done nothing wrong.’

  ‘But what about the Frenchman?’ she pressed. ‘He was one of us yet he was taken. And we shall probably suffer the same fate.’

  ‘Maybe not,’ I returned quickly. ‘I’ve show that I could be of great use to them. You’re probably in the same category. The Soul Gatherer could have taken either of us, or both if he was programmed to do so, but he didn’t. Therefore I say that we’re special.’

  ‘Well we’re not much use to anyone being held in this jail, are we?’

  ‘That’s because they believe we’ll cave in eventually,’ I told her. ‘It’s a case of attrition... wearing our resistance away gradually by this kind of punishment.’

  ‘Well I won’t do that!’ she persisted.

  ‘Nor me... never! I declared finally.

  She went to the bars as close as she could, staring out into the darkness ahead.

  ‘It’s hopeless,’ she cried, although there were no tears in her eyes.

  I realise then that no one in Heave could ever cry properly. Tears were never available in the essence of a spirit.

  My comment about the rules caused me to develop a great idea from another part of my brain. It dwelt on another aspect of my defence against the angelic hierarchy. In fact, if ithe plan t worked in my favour, I could possibly turn it into a form of attack. I closed my eyes and used telepathy in order to contact the Angel of Determination.

  ‘I want to be transported to the room wherre you expect me to work on the future population on Earth project,’ I thought with all my being. ‘Would you do that?’

  My request was carried out in an instant and I found myself in a small room with numerous scrolls on ledges fitted all around the walls. I glanced at some of them briefly to note the details relating to the technical complexities for future generations on Earth.

  The Angel of Determination appeared with a slight smile on his face as though he had won the battle against me.

  ‘So,’ he began slowly, ‘you’ve reviewed your situation and capitulated.’

  ‘No, I snarled, ‘I have not! I’ve come here to challenge the rules!’

  ‘You can’t do that,’ he returned casually. ‘The rules of Heaven are rigidly fixed... each and every one of the major ones and those of the minors.’

  ‘I don’t want to challenge their validity,’ I retorted nastily. ‘Quite the contrary. I need to find out what it says in the rules concerning a) the punishment of spirits, and b) the time permitted by the angelic hierarchy to incarcerate them. Your indicated that the rules are very precise and there must be a definition on these issues.’

  He seemed stunned by my challenge and, at first, he refused to do anything about it. However, in the predicament that I found myself, I wasn’t willing to give up my quest.

  ‘There must be a limitation to the number of punishments meted out to any one spirit,’ I claimed adamantly. I’ve been forced to stand at the Pit of Desolation, go through the Desert of Ice, spin in the Revolving-Twisting machine, and pass along the long dark tunnel to Hell. There has to be a limit to it written somewhere. It’s more than any spirit has to suffer and I’m positive there’s a clause in the rules which prohibits continuous punishments at random. At the same time, I’ve been incarcerated several times in that awful jail in Purgatory. No... I don’t believe it can go on and on. I demand to see a copy of the rules!’

  This time he was forced to react and his only option was to contact the angelic hierarchy. His head went down and he seemed to be praying as
I waited for a decision to be made on my demand. Eventually, his head came up and he stared at me solemnly.

  ‘Close your eyes!’ he commanded sonorously.

  I obeyed the order and the rules appeared in my mind as if I was watching a programme on television. I flashed through them quickly for there was a great deal of text until I came to the rules on the subject of punishment.

  ‘Aha!’ I exclaimed loudly, still keeping my eyes shut. ‘Listen to this! “A delinquent spirit is likely to be punished for a number of reasons set out below in Section Seventeen. However, it is declared that no spirit should be punished more than on three separate occasions as long as they are different types of punishment.” I opened my eyes jubilantly to face the Angel of Determination who stared at me bleakly. ‘There you have it!’ I exclaimed jubilantly. ‘I’ve been punished no less than on five separate occasions. The angelic hierarchy have broken the rules.’

  The sound of bells began to ring out long and loudly throughout the citadel, identifying the misdeed of the Heavenly angels. It was quite clear that there was no concession with regard to breaking the rules in Heaven... even when it came down to the angelic hierarchy. The Angel of Determination recognised the situation and it was abundantly obvious that a message was instantly communicated to him by someone high above.

  ‘I’m delighted to inform you that you have received sanction which allows you to be admitted into Heaven,’ he declared in a relatively joyful voice, although he seemed rather reluctant to have to utter the words.

  ‘Admitted into Heaven!’ I echoed loudly. ‘No, no, no! That’s the last thing I want! I’m not going to be bogged down for eternity by all your blessed rules whether they’re major or minor. No... stuff your sanction!’ I uttered openly with an element of distaste. ‘You can count me out!

  He seemed somewhat disturbed by my response and stood in front of me listlessly in confusion. ‘What do you want us to do then?’ he asked weakly not really knowing how to respond.

  I was delighted that the game they played had swiftly turned to my favour. I knew that I had the angelic hierarchy on the rack even though I was only a lowly Seraph in the field of ranking. ‘I’d like to arrange for two things to happen,’ I demanded mercilessly. ‘Firstly, I’d like you to release the female spirit in prison and allow her to enter this realm with impunity. She is to be afforded all the rights of any other spirit in Heaven. Secondly, reincarnate me back to Earth as a human-being without delay. I want to be rid of this place once and for all.’’

  I held my breath as I waited for him to reply. It was a case of living once again on Earth or dying in Heaven. I was certain that the Soul Gatherer would eventually be called into action to absorb me making me a dead spirit if I was ever sent back to the jail. Mind you, I strongly desired the presence of the female spirit who looked exactly like my mistress Jeannette Dubois. Although my fellow spirit with no name was now enjoying the luxuries of Hell, I recognised that it wouldn’t have been too unpleasant back in that cage to be there with her.

  The Angel of Determination responded without hesitation. ‘The first request will be carried out immediately,’ came the answer. ‘However there are complications with regard to the second one. You see, you’ve been here as a spirit in Heaven. Souls that are reincarnated are never allow to come this far. They’re always sent back at inception. I’m not sure that we can comply with your request.’

  ‘Oh I’m certain you can circumvent the rules in this particular case,’ I countered unhesitatingly. ‘Just ask the angelic hierarchy to send me back without delay. I want to return to Earth immediately as a human-being.’ I decided to become arrogant declaring my position adamantly now that I had won the war and I continued with my demand with relish. ‘Tell them to comply with that order!’

  He huffed and puffed for a few moments before replying. ‘Their decision will be communicated to you shortly,’ he returned, nodding briefly as he spread his great white wings to fly upwards out of the building through the aperture.

  There was clearly a great deal of discussion being carried out somewhere on high because I found myself standing alone in that room for quite some time waiting for a response.

  My journey through Heaven, Hell and Purgatory had been a fantastic adventure to say the least. I had spent some time in each of them being rejected by Heaven and Hell and incarcerated in Purgatory in that awful prison. The Heavenly authorities had tested my patience to the full serving me with punishment at the Pit of Desolation, in the Desert of Ice and on the Rotating-Twisting machine. I had to admit I was greatly disappointed with the angelic hierarchy with the fashion in which they had treated me. The situation in Heaven was nothing like the people on Earth imagined it to be. The priests in the churches, the cathedrals and the mosques had no idea what really went on there whereas my visit to Hell, as far as I was concerned, had been an inspiration.

  I recalled the fantastic story of a man who owned an electrical shop in a small town in southern India. He was married and had two sons who attended the local school. One Friday afternoon he left his shop with the week’s takings to go to the bank when he was mugged as he walked down the street. The robber possessed a revolver and he accidentally shot him in the head, killing him on the spot. A short while later, a boy was born in a nearby village. When he was eight years old, he told his mother that he owned an electrical shop in the town, and that he was married and had two children. Naturally she took it to be childish imagination. However, he persisted with the story on numerous occasions so she took him to the shop. Immediately he told her that the layout of all the equipment on sale there had been changed. Then he went up to the woman behind the counter, , whom he said was his wife, and whispered something into her ear. She moved back shocked at what he told her because she admitted that only her husband would have known what he said. After that, he pointed out his two sons from a school photograph of a hundred-and-twenty children mentioning their names accurately at the same time. He had obviously been reincarnated and remembered the details of his previous life. It had me hoping that I might recall the exact details of what had happened to me in the after-life.

  If that were possible what was there to remember? On reflection, there was no evidence of God or a Supreme Power in Heaven or of Satan in Hell. It appeared that Jesus Christ was not the son of God, as believed by those in the Christian religion on Earth but existed only as a mere spirit in Heaven. The realm so much revered on Earth was strictly governed by a series of rigid rules and regulations. It disposed of those spirits considered supernumerary by means of the Soul Gatherer whereby they ended up as dead souls removed to some unknown place. Heaven was located high up above the stars, entirely silent and soundless, except for bells which rang out when a spirit broke the rules, and it operated a series of learning projects such as the definition of galaxies within the universe, the Great Chain of Being, as well as a number of others including the new one concerning the future population of Earth. The spirits never spoke to each other while junior angels were not permitted to ask questions of senior angels. Leisure and pleasure activities did not seem to exist in this realm and there were no areas of real beauty such as mountains, valleys, gardens or lakes, only desert areas with the exception of the beautiful citadel. Those at the top of the angelic hierarchy sprouted great white wings which enabled them to fly while punishments of varying kinds were meted out to spirits who failed to expiate their sins which also meant that they were not allowed to enter Heaven until they did so. However, Hell was an entirely different matter altogether. It accepted criminals of all kinds and turned them into decent spirits by means of a number of activities which included writing, singing, art and gymnastics. There was a Cosmic Joker in Hell who constantly caused severe problems for practically everyone on Earth each day for his own amusement. In view of all that I had learned, it was therefore important for me to make certain that I acted as a criminal after being reincarnated to Earth to make sure that I woul
d be permitted to enter into Hell. I could only hope to remember that fact... it was imperative for me to do so!

  Then a slight smile crossed my face as I envisaged what my fellow spirit with no name would have said had he been with me.

  ‘C’mon, man! Get it together! You know you’ll remember tiddly-squat when you get back on Earth.’ I shook my head in disagreement hoping against hope that he would have been wrong.

  Suddenly, without warning, the power started to drain away from my essence and I began to feel rather faint. Then, before I could do anything about it, everything drifted away from my spirit into infinity. Although I was unaware of it, my spirit had vanished from Heaven, Hell and Purgatory and I was transported back to Earth to be reborn again. Indeed, I had won the war with the angelic hierarchy who had been forced to concede to my wishes in the end. The only problem on my arrival on Earth was that over twelve years had passed before I realised what was happening. My mind was totally blank with regard to my past lives as well as my recent spiritual experiences in the after-life. I was simply a small boy being affected by the trials and tribulations of a troubled life that was going on around me on Earth.

  I awoke one morning in a desert area with the sun beating down from a clear blue sky. My mind was befuddled as is the case with most people after a deep sleep and I looked around to observe hundreds of people laying on the ground around me.

  ‘How old am I, Mama?’ I asked the woman sitting next to me who was obviously my mother.

  ‘Twelve years old, Baka,’ she replied, searching for grains of food where we lay.

  So... I was a twelve year old boy born of Karuku parents who had lived in a small village on a plain in the Sudan on the eastern coast of Africa. My father, a member of the Karuku tribe, was a farmer but we were extremely poor for two reasons. Firstly, where we had lived there were no crops growing in the sun-baked fields because we had no money and therefore no seeds to sow. Even if we could have afforded it, severe drought had persisted in the region for many years making the soil infertile. Consequently, we are always short of food and often went hungry. Secondly, we were forced to leave our village by armed rebel soldiers who burned down our dwellings and created carnage, threatening to kill us all if we stayed.