Loving Eliza

by Ruth Ann Nordin

  “You are impossible, do you know that?”

  Shaking his head, he pointed at her.

  “Me? I’m not being impossible.”

  He shot her a ‘you’ve got to be kidding me’ look.

  “I told you from the beginning that I won’t marry you. I can’t help it if you refuse to accept that answer.”

  He reached into his pocket and pulled out the ring.

  She held her breath. Did he remember?

  He held it out to her.

  She gulped her coffee even though it burned her tongue and practically threw the cup in the sink.

  He winced, making her regret making the loud noise.

  “I should wash up for the day,” she whispered. “I’ll be back. If you don’t want to take me to town, then I’ll go by myself.”

  Giving her a ‘yuck’ facial expression, he nodded.

  “‘Yes’ as in you’ll take me?”

  He sighed but nodded.

  “Thank you, John.” She paused on her way to the door. She walked back over to him and kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry I left you alone at the town hall. I had promised I wouldn’t. I really didn’t think Bethany would keep me away for so long. You getting drunk like you did was my fault.”

  He shook his head and pointed to himself.

  “No. It’s mine,” she whispered and kissed the top of his head.

  As soon as she realized what she was doing, she excused herself and left. She made her way to the well and gathered a fresh pail of water. Once she shut the door of her home, she poured the water into the basin. She had hoped he’d kiss her again. That’s why she lingered by him like she had. What was wrong with her? She’d been granted a reprieve and all she could do was tempt fate.

  What was wrong with her? You love him.

  She washed her face, willing the nagging thought from her mind. She was a prostitute for goodness’ sakes! She had no right to marry anyone.

  You were a prostitute. You aren’t one now. You’ve been rescued from that life.

  She slowly dried her face with a towel. Did he have to know? It wasn’t like the past could be undone. Telling him wouldn’t change anything. And since Daphne decided not to show up...Did it make any sense that they should spend their lives alone?

  She set the towel down on the nightstand and changed her clothes. She didn’t have to make a decision right now. It could wait. What she needed to do was get ready so they could go to town. She’d think about it later.

  Chapter Eleven

  Eliza turned her gaze to the church. The memory of the ring made her finger tingle. Maybe she should marry John right now. Her heart pounded frantically in her chest as she quickly thought over the implications of such a decision. She spent the entire ride into town thinking through all the consequences of marrying him. She recalled his kisses...the one by the creek...and the one last night. Both had been so wonderful. She wanted to be kissed like that for the rest of her life.

  As she and John strolled down the road and neared the white building, her steps slowed. John held two bags of food, and despite the fact that his arms were full, he pointed at the church and gave her a pleading look.

  She didn’t say no this time. Instead, she stopped and glanced at him. He loved her. She could tell that in the way he looked at her. She’d seen other men give women the same adoring look and never thought someone might look at her that way. But John was looking at her that way now, and it made her stomach do crazy flip flops. Yes. She’d marry him. The past was the past and it could stay there. It was time to truly enjoy her life. After all, hadn’t Preacher Peters told her that God could give her a new life and it’d be like the past never happened? Maybe this was her new start, a chance to erase all that had occurred.

  Just as she was about to say yes, someone called out that the stagecoach had just arrived. She turned her attention to the group of people gathering to see who was coming.

  This time it was only one person. A young woman. From the looks of it, she was younger than Eliza. She was probably Charity’s age. Eliza could tell from the way she held herself that she was a respectable lady, just like Charity. An uneasy feeling unsettled her nerves. She had a nagging sensation that everything in her newfound world was about to change. And not for the better.

  The young woman spoke with the mayor who pointed at John.

  Eliza closed her eyes and sighed. This whole time she’d hoped that Daphne would show up, and now that she had, Eliza wished she hadn’t. Taking a deep breath, she turned to John and opened her eyes.

  He hadn’t been watching Daphne. He’d been watching her.

  “She’s here,” Eliza whispered. “You should meet her.”

  John blinked, as if not understanding, but when someone called his name, he finally turned his attention to the woman and the mayor as they made their way to them.

  Eliza stepped aside so the mayor and the young woman stood before John. The woman wore a pretty yellow dress with a matching hat. She had silky brown hair that rested softly against her shoulders. She even offered a polite smile to Eliza who forced a smile in return.

  “You’ll never guess who finally showed,” Chandler Davis told John. He laughed. “Go ahead and guess.”

  John glanced at the mayor and then to the woman and then to Eliza.

  Eliza quickly looked away. It was hard enough to go through this without seeing the unspoken question in his eyes. What were they to do now? Well, the answer was simple. He’d marry the bride he sent for.

  Chandler laughed again and patted John on the back. “He can’t speak, so it’s not fair to make him guess. John, this is Daphne O’Conner. You know, the mail-order bride you sent for.”

  “I know he can’t talk,” Daphne told the mayor. She turned and gave John a soft smile. “It’s nice to meet you, John. I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to write and tell you I’d be coming in later than we agreed. You see, I ran into some problems with the first stagecoach I took. Then I had to wait for another one to come. Between all of that, I had to stay in a small town and wait. I wanted to write but I lost your PO Box address.”

  “What an unfortunate thing to happen,” the mayor said, shaking his head. “It’s good you made it.”

  “I still haven’t gotten my luggage though. That is still on its way. I believe Mr. Bower said it will be here in two weeks.”

  “Oh, how unfortunate. I’m sure we can arrange for you to get another dress and anything you may need until then. I’ll send you on over to Addy Garrison. She does most of the sewing in town, and her husband owns the general store. They’ll get you set up, so you don’t have anything to worry about.”

  “Thank you. That’s very nice of you.”

  Grinning widely, he shrugged. “Think nothing of it. You’re a part of this community now, and if there’s one thing we believe in here, it’s the importance of helping each other out.”

  Of course that depends on whether or not you’re mute. Eliza bit her tongue so she wouldn’t say the words that screamed in her head.

  “This is a wonderful place,” Daphne agreed, nodding. “I am looking forward to spending my life here. John, I hope you don’t mind waiting until my luggage comes in before we wed. I put my wedding dress in there, and since I spent two months making it, I do want to wear it.”

  Oh, why don’t they just get married now and get it over with? Eliza willed her thoughts to calm down. It was hard enough to go through this without a prolonged engagement. She didn’t realize she’d been gripping her purse until one of her fingernails ripped the fabric. She immediately loosened her hold. She ventured a look at John and saw him shaking his head.

  “The boy is anxious to make you his wife,” Chandler remarked, obviously amused. He turned to John. “I realize it’s hard to wait, but you don’t want Miss O’Conner to miss out on the chance to wear the dress she made, do you? That wouldn’t be fair to her.”

  “I’m sorry, John,” Daphne said in her gentle voice. “It is important to me, but if you really do want to
marry today, I’ll certainly do so.”

  John shook his head again.

  The mayor looked satisfied. “Oh well, there. That’s good. He’s willing to wait. Two weeks isn’t a long time. Actually, neither is two months. Why, it was two months ago that Miss Sweet here came to town.”

  Eliza almost jumped back at the mention of her made-up last name. “Two months ago?”

  The mayor chuckled. “You came here two months ago, remember?”

  She nodded. “Yes. I did,” she told Daphne.

  “She came to work for Melissa Peters, but the poor thing had a terrible fall and had to be buried.”

  Daphne brought her hand to her heart. “No!”

  “Yes. It was tragic. She was a good woman too. Since that happened, Miss Sweet had nowhere to work, so John here decided to employ her. She’s been painting up his house and doing things a maid does. Now, she stays in the small cabin on his property, so there’s nothing immoral going on between them.”

  “No, there isn’t,” Eliza assured Daphne. “I have my own little house.”

  Daphne took her hand in hers. “I’m glad that you found someone to give you a place to sleep and food to eat. I believe in people helping each other.” She turned to John. “What a beautiful thing you did for her.” Then she returned her attention to Eliza. “I will make sure that you keep working out there. I certainly don’t want anyone to go hungry.”

  Eliza swallowed the bitter lump in her throat. Stay there? And watch the two of them together?

  Daphne released her hand and asked, “Where did you come from?”

  Startled by the change in topic, she hesitated before answering. “I came from Omaha.”

  “That’s a long way from here. I came from Ohio.”

  “You had a longer journey than I did.”

  “Part of it was by train. That’s where my luggage is.”

  “I hope it comes in soon.”

  How easy the lie came out, Eliza thought. She chastised herself for wishing the wedding dress would never get here, for if it didn’t, Daphne wouldn’t marry John. Then maybe she’d go back to Ohio and Eliza could have John again. Not that he was ever hers to begin with. He had belonged to Daphne as soon as she agreed to marry him.

  Daphne directed her attention to the mayor. “I must stay in town until I’m married.”

  Yes, Daphne O’Conner is every bit the lady. She was polite, kind, and pure. She probably wouldn’t even hurt a fly. She would do the right thing and be blessed because of it. As Eliza watched the mayor and Daphne discuss where she could stay, she couldn’t help but think of how much she hated Daphne. Daphne represented everything that Eliza wanted to be but couldn’t. She also had what Eliza couldn’t. Eliza glanced at John who was staring at her. She quickly averted her gaze to Daphne and the mayor.

  I refuse to hate her. She’s done nothing wrong. She doesn’t deserve to be hated. Eliza didn’t know what to do with her whirling emotions except to force them back into the place where she put all of her unwanted feelings. She’d pretend that everything was fine. The method had worked in the past. If she could think of something—anything—that she’d count as a blessing right now, it’d help. She ran through the things she was grateful for. A place to eat, a place to sleep, a woman who was no longer a prostitute, the chance to be a lady, having received a kiss from a man who wanted more than a quick rump in the bed... No. She wouldn’t go there. She wouldn’t think of John.

  “I appreciate the help, Mr. Davis,” Daphne said, breaking Eliza from her thoughts. “I’ll go see Mrs. Custer at once.”

  Eliza decided that she’d start being friendly and this was a good time to do so. “Charity just arrived here two months ago too. In fact, I came on the same stagecoach she did. I think you two will get along very well. You have so much in common.” Like being proper young women.

  “Then I must meet her. Thank you, Miss Sweet.”

  Eliza returned her smile.

  The mayor looked at John. “You want to come along and spend a little time with your intended?”

  John shook his head and nodded toward the groceries.

  “Alright. Go on home. But don’t stay away for too long. You got yourself a keeper,” he replied.

  “I’ll see you soon, John,” Daphne promised.

  That, Eliza thought, is exactly what I’m afraid of. She breathed a sigh of relief as the two left. She caught sight of the group of onlookers before she turned and walked in the direction of John’s wagon. He walked beside her and gestured, but she pretended not to notice that he was trying to get her attention. Instead, she stared straight ahead, only to glance back one time at the church. She should have married him when she first got here or at any of the other times when he asked. But now she missed her chance, and it was too late. Now she wouldn’t ever know what could’ve been.

  ***

  John didn’t want to leave town. He didn’t want to marry Daphne. It was unfortunate that she had been delayed, but let Old Willy, Buck, Troy, or even Shawn marry her. Shawn was close enough to her age since she was eighteen. Daphne had four men to choose from. Certainly, that was more than enough. She didn’t need to be with him.

  There was only one person he wanted to marry, and that was Eliza. He had tried to get her attention as she walked back to his wagon, but she wouldn’t look at him. He thought she was actually going to marry him until that stagecoach pulled in. There had been a hesitation in her step and she had a thoughtful look on her face, as if she was finally giving it serious consideration.

  But then Chandler had called out his name and that was it. All along, Eliza had been holding out for Daphne to appear. And now she got her wish. He sat in front of his work bench where the block of wood waited for him to cut into, but he didn’t feel like working. He felt like finding Eliza and hauling her to town and to the preacher.

  He looked out his window and saw that Eliza hadn’t returned from the creek. Maybe he should go there and ask her what was on her mind. She hadn’t told him anything. In fact, she remained quiet the entire way back. That wasn’t like her. And it worried him.

  He took the ring out of his pocket and examined it. It seemed to him that something important happened last night, but he couldn’t remember exactly what it was...well, besides the kissing. She had said something that gave him hope. What was it? He sighed and shoved it back into his pocket. He didn’t want to put the ring on Daphne’s finger. He was going to have to explain to her that he loved Eliza. It wasn’t exactly what he was looking forward to, but it had to be done. Then he could assure her that there were other single men who would be more than happy to be with her.

  A horse neighed and he turned his attention to the window. Old Willy rode up on his property.

  John frowned and stood up. He put the hat on his head and ran out to meet him.

  Old Willy stopped the horse. “Thank goodness. John, my fence broke down an’ that neighbor’s dog has been findin’ his way into my shed. You know that’s the shed I keep my paints in. Well, the dog seems to think he can jump all over the place and knock them down. I can’t go on like this. If he keeps on destroyin’ my paint, how will I ever stay in business? Can you repair the fence? I’ll give you more free paint.”

  John nodded.

  The man looked relieved. “Thank you, John. I’ll be at home. I don’ dare leave that place for long.”

  As Old Willy led the horse into a run, John turned in the direction of the creek. He paused. He should bring something to write on. He didn’t know how to explain the situation to her through gestures. Once he retrieved the paper and pencil from the kitchen table, he walked to the creek where he found Eliza. She was resting against a tree and had apparently fallen asleep.

  No wonder she stayed here for so long. He sat next to her and got ready to wake her when he realized that she’d been crying. What made her sad? He gently shook her arm.

  She slowly opened her eyes and jerked up when she saw him. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” She rubbed her eyes and b
linked several times as if she was having a hard time waking up.

  He took the pad and wrote, “Rong?” Then he showed it to her.

  “What’s wrong?”

  He nodded.

  “Nothing. I’m just tired, that’s all. It was a long night.”

  He didn’t believe her, so he shook his head.

  “Fine. If you think there’s something wrong, then tell me what it is.”

  He thought of all the possibilities and couldn’t find anything that applied. Finally, he shrugged.

  “So there you have it. Is that why you came out here?”

  Recalling his reason for being there, he wrote, “Wily cam. Need fix fens.”

  She read his words. “Willy needs you to fix his fence?”

  He nodded. He did like being able to write his thoughts out. It made it easier to communicate.

  “How long will you be gone?”

  He thought over how much time it might take and held up two fingers.

  “Two hours?”

  Smiling, he nodded.

  “I’ll have something ready for you to eat when you get back.”

  As she stood, he reached for her hand.

  “What? Is there more?”

  He pointed to her ring finger.

  She pulled her hand away and snapped, “I can’t believe you. Daphne’s in town now. How can you persist in this now that she’s here?”

  He wrote, “No want her. Want yu.”

  “She came all this way to marry you, John. She’s a good woman. The kind you need to marry. She’ll make you happy. She’ll give you lots of children.”

  He shook his head and pointed at her.

  “I can’t give you what she can. I just can’t.”

  Then he remembered the previous night when she looked down at him and said she wanted to marry him but couldn’t. He smiled and quickly wrote, “Yu sed yu want marry me. I rember.”

  She snatched the pad from him. “Don’t you have a fence to fix?”

  He jumped up and took the ring from his pocket. He pointed to her finger and then the ring.

  “Get out of here! Go!” She threw the pad into the creek and stormed off.