by Cameron Dane
Chapter Twelve
Devlin stirred, roused by a siren somewhere in the distance. Police car, not a fire truck. Not that he would get a call if it were a fire.
Soon, Morgan. Soon.
Heat rode Devlin’s front, not quite a crackling blaze but still damned toasty. He smiled against the shoulder of the man in front of him, pleased to see that Garrick was still asleep.
He needs this peace.
Devlin scooted in somehow closer to Garrick and kept his arm wrapped tightly around Garrick’s waist. He attached himself to his man from top to bottom, closed his eyes against the moonlight peeking in through the edges of the curtains pulled across the window, and drifted back to sleep...
*
...The softly lit airport and smattering of people milling about reflected the lateness of the hour. His hand linked in Gradyn’s, Devlin felt his legs grow heavier with each step that got him closer to his flight ... and to a goodbye. Devlin’s stomach twisted, and he crushed Gradyn’s fingers, as if fusing their hands together would change the outcome of this weekend fling.
I don’t want this to be the end.
Devlin took another step, and met with resistance. He glanced back, and a foot away, Gradyn stood motionless, their hands twined in the middle.
Gradyn’s lips flattened to a thin, pale line, and his tattoos suddenly seemed stark and prominent, as if they took over his whole face and head.
“This is the stopping point for me,” Gradyn said. He looked up, over Devlin’s head, and Devlin followed his stare to the sign PASSENGERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT. “I can’t walk with you any farther.”
The end of this weekend punched Devlin fully in the gut, right where he stood. Damn it, Morgan. Devlin forced his back straight. Don’t you dare pussy out and cry.
Gradyn tugged Devlin to him, speared his fingers into Devlin’s hair, and tilted his head back. “We had fun, beautiful.” He grazed his thumb back and forth along Devlin’s jaw, and a softer smile took over the hard lines previously shaping his lips. “At least, I know I did.”
“Me too.” Devlin’s voice caught, and he covered it by throwing his arms around Gradyn and burying his face in the man’s chest. The feel of muscular arms immediately circling him sucked Devlin back into the raw places he had gone with this man this weekend, and he tried to drown the goodbye with levity. “It’s going to take weeks before the imprint of you inside me goes away,” he murmured with a thick chuckle. With just speaking those words, Devlin’s ass throbbed. His sore passage reached for Gradyn again, and his chest constricted with loss. “I wish I could feel it forever.”
Gradyn exhaled, and his breath washed over Devlin’s ear. “Don’t do this, Devlin.” Even as he said that, Gradyn clutched Devlin to him in a suffocating embrace. “Please.” He dug his chin into the top of Devlin’s head, and his voice sounded rough. “I can’t handle tears.”
Suck it up, Morgan. Quit being a needy little bitch.
Devlin took a couple of deep breaths, and pulled away. “I apologize.”
Gradyn’s face fell, and he reached for Devlin. “Devlin, I didn’t mean--”
“No.” Devlin lifted his hand. “I’m fine. I promise.” He took a step backward, prepared to leave this tryst in the unspoken way they’d somehow agreed it should end, but he couldn’t make himself move another inch away from this fierce, harshly-attractive, sweet, funny, generous, patient, kind man. Devlin’s body would not process and act on the commands his brain sent his limbs to move.
It’s because this isn’t right. You don’t turn your back on an amazing weekend and an incredible person just because it’s not supposed to become something special.
Devlin’s entire being rejected the idea of never seeing Gradyn Connell again. That was why he could not move.
No guts, no reward, Morgan. Sometimes you have to step onto the ledge and risk falling without a net.
Right.
Devlin prayed for bravery and extra balls as he reached into the outer flap of his carry-on bag and unclipped the pen he had attached to his travel portfolio. His throat felt a little tight, his heart sped like crazy, but Devlin picked up Gradyn’s hand, his own shaking, and put ink to skin. “This is my phone number and e-mail address.” He wrote both ways to contact him on Gradyn’s palm. “Before you say anything, I know that wasn’t how this weekend started when you picked me up in that club, but it’s the way I have to end it.” He clicked his pen closed and looked up into Gradyn’s eyes as he curled the man’s hand into a fist. “Think about using them. I can only speak for myself, but I don’t want this to be the last time I see you or speak to you.” His chest heaved, and he worked like the devil not to lose what was left of his cool. “You’ve already become too important to me to say goodbye.”
Piercing brightness shone in Gradyn’s pure green gaze, and his mouth gaped for a moment, without sound. “Devlin...”
“It’s not goodbye. I hope not anyway.” Devlin rushed to speak over Gradyn, frantically drowning out what might be a rejection. “How about, see you lat--”
Gradyn made an inhuman noise and crushed his mouth down on Devlin’s, stealing his breath and voice. He dug his fingers into Devlin’s head and held Devlin in place for a scorching, devouring kiss. Right in the airport--Devlin was acutely aware of other patrons not far away--Gradyn pushed down on Devlin’s jaw, forced his mouth open, and kissed Devlin with an intensity and desperation it hurt to feel. Devlin clung to Gradyn with hands twisted in his shirt and gave himself up to the mating with equal fervor, fearing that he needed this show of affection from Gradyn as much as he needed air to breathe.
Devlin slashed his mouth across Gradyn’s and strained up into him with all of his weight. Gradyn abruptly tore his mouth away, making Devlin keen a needy, “No.”
Gradyn wrapped his hands around Devlin’s wrists and pushed him a measure away. With his fingers crushing bone under their hold, Gradyn breathed heavily, his chest rising and dipping in waves, and he looked at Devlin in a way that Devlin felt brush against his soul.
“Please know these were the best two and a half days of my life.” Gradyn’s voice sounded like he’d abraded his vocal cords. “But it can’t go on.” He released Devlin’s arms, and whispered, “Goodbye.” He turned and walked away, taking long, fast strides, out of Devlin’s reach.
Out of his life.
Standing there watching Gradyn get smaller and smaller, Devlin rubbed his fingers across his swollen mouth, still able to feel Gradyn’s kiss, and mentally willed the man to turn around and look at him one more time.
Devlin stood rooted to the floor for long minutes, his heart cracking inside. People moved around him; he didn’t know what they thought about what they had witnessed, and he didn’t care.
As the time ticked away, and Devlin knew he needed to move or miss his flight, he kept praying Gradyn would come running back to him and admit he felt something that meant more than a weekend of fucking too.
He never did.
Devlin finally turned, his soul crying inside, and got in the proper line to fly home to Maine. All the while wishing he had a tattooed man by his side, and wondering how a person could disconnect from their feelings the way Gradyn Connell just had...
*
...Devlin came awake with a start, his heart beating a furious rhythm as he lived inside the remnants of his memory. He reached out for Garrick, only to find him not there.
“I’m over here.” Garrick’s familiar voice reached him in a hushed tone.
Devlin whipped around and found Garrick sitting on a stool situated just to the right of the window, and he used the side of the microwave as a brace for his back. He wore only a white pair of cotton briefs, and the streak of moonlight streaming in through the sliver of open curtain highlighted the paler tone of his skin. It also put the definition of his sleeker muscles on one hell of a display.
Thank God. Devlin started breathing again. He’s still here.
“That must have been some dream,” Garrick said as he glance
d over at Devlin. “You were twitching your way through it.”
“I was remembering when you said goodbye.” The second Devlin answered, his stare narrowed, and he perked up. “Hey, when did you wake up? You were asleep,” Devlin searched for the time and found it on the microwave, “less than an hour ago.”
“I woke up when I heard the siren,” Garrick replied, “just like you did. You got comfortable right away again, though, and I didn’t want to disturb you. Once something wakes me, I don’t fall back to sleep.” His Adam’s apple suddenly bobbed visibly. “I’m sorry that e-mail is still hurting you. God knows I hate myself for it.”
“What?” Devlin scrubbed his face, trying to wake up, as confusion overtook him. “Oh.” Garrick’s comment suddenly hit him. “I didn’t mean that goodbye. Not the e-mail. I was dreaming about when we were at the airport together. I was thinking about the way you kissed me.” He felt himself smile but then it fell away. “And then how you walked away without looking back.”
Garrick chuckled, the sound without humor. “That’s about the only successful thing I did do that night. I managed to walk away, when all I wanted to do was stay with you. I successfully pulled away and started walking, and I told myself the whole time not to glance back.” Garrick held Devlin to him right now with the rough texture of his voice and the intensity of his stare. “I knew I’d run right back to you if I did. I could feel your phone number and e-mail address burning my palm,” he curled his hand into a fist, “like a fucking brand, so I went into the first bathroom I found, determined to wash it off. Instead, I stood in front of that sink, staring at my hand, and I memorized the information rather than wiping it away. Right then and there,” he shook his head as he tipped his head back and turned his gaze up to the ceiling, “I understood I wouldn’t forget you. I ran out and back to you, but by then you were already gone.” He rolled his head and found Devlin in the shadows again. “I thought that might be fate--a sign that I wasn’t supposed to see you again after all--so I went back to the motel, got my stuff and my bike, and I drove back to CBI headquarters. Through the entire ride, I tried to memorize numbers on signs, and did my best to dislodge your contact info from my head.” He shook his head and laughed. “But what did I do the second I walk inside that federal building?”
Devlin found himself perched at the end of the bed, as if he didn’t already know the answer. “You sent me an e-mail,” he said, his voice soft.
“Yep.” Garrick had a look on his face that seemed to mingle humor and annoyance. “I knew it wasn’t smart to instigate contact with you. At that time, I thought for sure I would have to go back into the biker club. At best we’d only have time to trade a couple e-mails and phone calls before I had to disappear again, but the thought of never hearing your voice again...” Garrick pursed his lips, his eyes unnaturally bright. “I couldn’t live with you believing that you were just a fuck for me. I think I knew from the beginning you would be much more than that.” He turned his head toward the window again, and his voice dropped to a hush. “Then I had to go break your heart anyway. Maybe it would have been better to let you believe what we did together was just about relieving a physical need.”
“Don’t say that.” Devlin’s chest squeezed and his throat hurt. He went to the sink, taking a moment to fill and drink a glass of water. “If we hadn’t shared those six months,” he leaned against the counter and stared at Garrick’s stark profile, “would you have come to Redemption when your life fell apart?”
Garrick finally pulled his attention off the wedge of uncovered window and put it on Devlin. “That six months took us from lovers to partners, I think. Ass backward, but no less powerful, if that makes sense.”
“It does.” The small room, along with the wee hours of the night, cloaked each word they spoke in an additional layer of intimacy. “That makes the pain worth it for me. The time we spent getting to know one another is ultimately what brought you back to me.” He looked right into the man’s eyes and did not let his voice waver even a hair. “I forgive you. I think maybe you need to hear that.”
“I do.” Garrick nodded and he clearly worked hard to blink some of the sheen from his eyes. He averted his head, and his voice dropped, but Devlin still heard him say, “Thank you.”
Devlin got up to go to Garrick, when suddenly Garrick narrowed his stare through the crack in the curtains. “Oh, sweet merciful God.” The man shot up off his stool, ripped open the door, and then tore out of the apartment at a breakneck speed.
“What the fuck?” Devlin picked up his sweats, shoved himself into them, and snatched Garrick’s shorts up off the floor. He flew out of the room and took the steps two at a time after Garrick, but Garrick was already halfway across the lawn, heading for the Fine’s backyard.
*
Someone is breaking into the house.
Garrick’s first thought: assassin.
He ate up the grass under his feet and sped around the house to the Fine’s kitchen door, knowing he could kick that lock in a shitload easier than the front door.
Thank God Devlin had almost fucking brought him to tears, forcing Garrick to avert his head so the man wouldn’t see them. If Garrick hadn’t sought the safety of his nightly ritual of peeking out the window when he couldn’t sleep, he would have missed the dark shadow jumping over the side of the Fine’s front porch and disappearing around the far side of the house.
If someone hurts Grace and the kids in order to get to me... “Shit.” Garrick couldn’t even contemplate that. He might not be able to recover.
A scream shrieked through the house just as Garrick leaped up the steps to the kitchen door. The sound pierced Garrick’s skin and sank into his bones, horrifying him to his core. Pure adrenaline flooded his system, charging him with superhuman strength. He put every ounce of his weight behind his shoulder and slammed into the door, cracking the wood right off the frame and sending the door flying open.
Garrick ran through the darkened kitchen and dining room, through the living room, and found the kids screaming “Mommy, Mommy!” in the hallway outside their mother’s open bedroom door.
Shit.
“In your room; get in a room!” Garrick came up on them and shoved both kids none-too-gently away from their mother’s door. “Right now!” His voice went hoarse as he saw Grace and a man dressed in camouflage doing battle out of the corner of his eye. A knife and a gun were on the floor. He yelled back at Chloe and Shawn, “Lock the door and don’t come out!”
Devlin appeared at the end of the hall. “I got ’em!” he shouted, grabbing each kid by their arms and dragging their little kicking bodies to safety. “Go!”
Garrick dove into the fray just as Grace rammed the heel of her foot back into her assailant’s knee. The man roared a foul word and let go of her but threw himself onto her back the second she moved, and he took them both to the carpet. Garrick hurled himself onto the man’s back and burrowed his arms under the guy’s armpits, chopping at his hold on Grace.
The man reared and elbowed Garrick in the jaw with near bone-crushing force. He turned on Garrick and threw a punch to the center of Garrick’s chest, knocking the wind right out of him.
Fuck. He’s had special training. Gotta be after me. Garrick kicked the man’s leg out from under him and took him to the ground again. As Garrick gasped for breath, he threw himself at the assailant who had shot to his feet with lightning-fast moves and lunged for Grace again.
Grace grabbed the knife and plunged it into the man’s shoulder--or at least she tried to. She cried out as the blade didn’t sink in deeply--as it should have--and she grabbed her wrist as the knife fell to the floor.
Kevlar vest. Garrick processed that the man had on some sort of protective gear under his fatigues while tackling him from behind and shoving him face first into the wall. The man surged with much the same strength Garrick had possessed when knocking down the door; the guy rammed his head backward and head-butted Garrick’s skull with brain-shaking power and precision.
The assailant went for Grace again. Through the dizzying hit Garrick’s head had taken, he managed to lunge and yank one foot out from under the attacker. At the same time, Grace kicked her leg out at the guy in a karate move and jammed him in the stomach hard enough to send him flying out the door and into the hallway.
Still seeing two of everything, Garrick jumped to his feet and raced out into the hallway after the man, unsteady as he chased a blurry figure streaking toward the front of the house.
The attacker yanked the front door open without incident. He must have unlocked it before going after Grace. The man flew through the opening and down the steps, shouting, “You got lucky, bitch.” He pointed as he sprinted across the street and threw himself into a car. “I’m coming back for you!” Wheels spun, creating smoke, as the car, clearly already running, chewed up the pavement, and the guy got away.
Garrick chased the car halfway down the street and managed to get color, model, and the first half of the license plate number, but no more than that before the car turned out of sight.
“You got lucky, bitch.” The words reverberated in Garrick’s head as he jogged back to the house. This guy wasn’t here for me. Still, even as Garrick wondered what the hell this man wanted with Grace, he couldn’t stop shaking as scenarios of how easily that could have been an assassin coming for him hit his psyche.
It could have been for me.
The bastard could have taken out my family in the process.
Right on the front lawn, Garrick doubled over and threw up what was left of his dinner. Bile burned his throat as he coughed and retched up everything in his stomach, while his arms and legs shook like a newborn foal.
I have to get out of here. I can’t do this. It’s not safe. I might as well kill them all myself.
“Here.” Devlin’s deep, familiar voice burrowed into Garrick’s being, and his warm hand rubbed the tension knotting the small of Garrick’s back. “Put these on.” Devlin dangled a pair of shorts under Garrick’s downturned face. “Let’s start with that.”
