Phoenix

by Linda Warren

  He reached for the diaper bag he’d stuffed earlier. He removed most of it and added Jake’s blanket, his jacket, Floppy, the horse, some clothes, diapers and a sippy cup. He slipped it over his shoulder and carried it into the den. Everyone looked anxiously at him as if they didn’t know what to say to him. And they had reason to be cautious. He was teetering on the brink of a total breakdown. But he was stronger than that.

  “Where are you going?” his mom asked.

  “To see Gabe and to take these things to Ms. Henshaw so she can give them to Jake. He’ll feel better if he has his familiar stuff.”

  “It’ll work out, son. Just have faith.”

  He took a couple steps toward the door and realized this was the time he had to make a stand. For his future. For Jake’s future. He turned to face his mother.

  “I love you, Mom, but I’ve been avoiding telling you something because I know you’re not going to like it.”

  His mom waved a hand. “Go see Gabe and we can talk later. I’m sure it’s nothing important.”

  “It is. To me. You’ve asked about Rosie and I avoided the question, as did everyone else, and there’s a reason for that. Rosie is Rosemary… McCray Wilcott.”

  “No!” She covered her mouth with her hand.

  “Yes. I love her and Jake loves her. I’m planning a future with her if I can convince her to marry me.”

  “No.” His mom shook her head. “I forbid it. You will stay away from that girl. Do you hear me, Phoenix?”

  “Mom…” Quincy put an arm around their mother’s shoulder.

  “Stay out of this, Quincy.” Their mother shook off Quincy’s arm.

  “It’s okay,” Phoenix said to Quincy. “I knew this was how she would react. That’s okay, too. Mom has a right to feel the way she does, but if you remember, I was one of the boys who was shot. If I can forgive, Mom, I was hoping you could, too. If not, after I see Gabe, I’ll come back and clear out my stuff.”

  “No!” his mom screamed after him. “Come back here, Phoenix.”

  He kept walking with Quincy, Falcon and Jude fast on his heels. He climbed into his truck, and Quincy yanked open the door.

  “Phoenix, you can’t drop a bombshell like that and just leave. We have to talk this through for Mom’s sake.”

  “I’m through talking, Quincy. I have the fight of my life on my hands, and that’s all that’s on my mind right now.”

  “You need your family to get through this.”

  “I need Rosie, Quincy. That’s who I need. I’m sorry this hurts Mom, but it’s hurting me, too. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to choose…”

  “Phoenix—” Jude tried to get a word in, but Grandpa pushed him aside.

  “This is your home, boy, and you’re always welcome here. Don’t you ever forget that. You go get that little whippersnapper back and we’ll all be waiting. That’s what families do and we’re all family. Just don’t cut those ties forever, because no one here wants that, especially your mother.” Grandpa patted his shoulder, and words clogged Phoenix’s throat. He only nodded and pulled the door closed. As he backed out, Paxton jumped into the passenger side.

  Phoenix stopped the truck. “Get out.”

  “Hey. I always ride shotgun.”

  “Not today.”

  “C’mon, Phoenix. We shared a lot over the years, and you’re going to need someone today. I’m here, so let’s don’t argue about it.”

  “Thanks, Pax, but Rosie is the only person I need to get through this. As soon as I talk to Gabe, I’m going to find her, because I can’t get through this without her.”

  “Man, you really love her, don’t you?”

  “Yes. I really do.”

  Paxton slid out of the truck. “Call if you need me.”

  Phoenix drove away, resisting the urge to look back at the ranch he’d loved all his life. But like Rico had said, he had to make a choice, and he made the one that was right for him.

  *

  ROSIE WOKE UP to barking. Sitting up, she realized she was still on the sofa in her clothes. She’d cried herself to sleep, and Dixie was having an antsy fit to go outside and pee. Rosie got up and opened the door, and Dixie darted out.

  After making coffee, she let Dixie back in. It was cold outside. She opened the refrigerator and saw Phoenix’s orange juice, and all her love for him brought tears to her eyes. How was she going to go on without him and Jake?

  On the floor was a toy horse. She picked it up and slid into the booth. She knew without a doubt that her father had meant every word he’d said about hurting Phoenix. She couldn’t let that happen, even if it meant giving Phoenix up. A sob rose in her throat, and she noticed her phone on the table. She clicked on and read Phoenix’s message.

  Touching the screen, she muttered, “Oh, Phoenix, don’t do this. It isn’t easy, but we have to stay apart. It’s for the best.” She had a voice mail from him, too. She didn’t listen to it. It was just too hard. Turning her phone off, she held it for a moment, as if she could feel Phoenix’s presence, and then she went to take a shower and get dressed for the day. She had to make decisions and she needed a clear head, even though her heart was breaking.

  By midmorning she knew she had to leave the trailer because Phoenix would come back. He wouldn’t give up. He wouldn’t be the man she loved if he did. After practicing with Lady and making sure the horses had enough feed, she headed out for she knew not where, but a few days would give her a better perspective. She didn’t have a rodeo this weekend, so she would just take a break. Just her and Dixie.

  *

  PHOENIX MADE IT to Gabe’s office, which was on the square in Horseshoe, in record time. The receptionist’s office was empty, and he walked through to a bigger office. Gabe was on the phone.

  Gabe was his mother’s baby brother and her only brother. Phoenix’s grandmother had died when Gabe was fourteen years old, and he’d come to live with the Rebel family. He’d grown up with the Rebel boys, and he favored them, too, with dark eyes and hair. As soon as he graduated from high school, he was off to college and a law career, but part of Gabe would always be a cowboy.

  He waved Phoenix to a leather chair in front of his desk. After a moment, he clicked off his phone. “Do you have some papers for me?” Gabe got down to business and Phoenix was grateful for that. He wasn’t in a mood to talk about family.

  Phoenix handed him the papers Ms. Connors had given him and the file Phoenix had brought from Denver. Gabe quickly went through them. “Tell me all you know.”

  Phoenix went over everything that had happened since he’d found out he was Jake’s father.

  “So everyone the police investigated at the time said that Ms. Green Stephens had abandoned Jake?”

  “Yes. That’s why I was granted full custody, but now she’s saying she was in contact with the grandmother at all times.”

  Gabe went through the papers again. “I have a lot of checking to do, and since it’s Saturday I may not get the answers I want, but I know a good detective who can pull answers out of thin air. But again, it’s Saturday, and he has a family, so this is going to be slow go.”

  “The hearing is Monday, Gabe. We don’t have time to go slow.”

  “Mmm. I wonder how Ms. Green Stephens got this pushed through so fast and what’s her hurry.”

  “I have no idea, but Jake was so upset when they took him. I have to get him back, Gabe. Do whatever you can and then some.”

  “I’m on it, but Lacey’s three weeks away from delivery, and I can’t get too far away from home because I want to be there with the twins are born.”

  Gabe’s wife was expecting a boy and a girl, and the family was happy for them. Gabe had lost his first son in an ATV accident and the family thought he would never recover, but he’d found Lacey and fallen in love. He’d adopted Lacey’s half sister, and they’d become a family.

  “The hearing’s on Monday so you should be safe.”

  Gabe leaned back in his chair. “That’s just the problem, Phoenix.
I don’t have enough time to prepare this case or enough evidence to discredit what Ms. Green is saying. I have to ask for a continuance, but at this late date I’m not sure a judge is going to grant it.”

  “No continuance, Gabe. I want Jake in my custody as soon as possible.”

  Gabe leaned forward, his hands folded on the desk. “I have to be honest, Phoenix. This woman wants her child and she’s not leaving any room for error. The judge in Colorado is on her side. That’s why this has been pushed through so fast. Evidently he saw that something was done illegally, and he wants it corrected in the mother’s favor.”

  Phoenix got to his feet. “She can’t do this. She left him with her sixty-six-year-old grandmother. How can they see any right in that? She hasn’t seen him in two years. He doesn’t know who she is.” He poked a finger into his chest. “He knows who I am. He knows I’m his daddy.”

  “Just calm down.”

  “I wish everyone would stop telling me to calm down. This woman has had my child removed from my care. Jake was screaming his head off calling for me, and I’ll never get that sound out of my head.”

  Gabe stared at him. “Is this the same Phoenix who spiked the punch at parties just for laughs, put itch powder in my boots and pulled just about every trick in the book on all of us at one time or another?”

  “I grew up the moment I learned I was a father.”

  “I can see that.” Gabe opened the folder Phoenix had given him. “I’m going to call Levi Coyote…”

  “Who?”

  “He’s the PI I was telling you about. He used to be a cop in Austin and now works for the DA’s office and takes a few private cases. He’s a good investigator. If Valerie Green has anything in her past she’s trying to hide, he will find it. Just be prepared for the results.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Gabe looked at him, and Phoenix’s nerves tightened. He knew something bad was coming by the dark look in his uncle’s eyes. “She is the mother, and in the majority of custody cases involving a baby, a judge will grant the mother custody unless she has a criminal record or is seen as unfit. You need to prepare yourself for that.”

  “I’ll never be able to accept that. Jake belongs with me. I know that. I only knew Valerie for a little while, but I know she’s not a better parent than me. I would never leave my son with someone else for two years. To me that is unforgivable. That’s not a parent.”

  “I’ll start making calls. I’m hoping Levi will be on board with this.” He glanced at Phoenix. “You go home and talk to your mother and wait for me to call you.”

  “You’ve talked to Mom about Rosie?”

  “Yes, she’s very upset. Dating a McCray?” Gabe shook his head. “That’s like asking your mom to cozy up to a rattlesnake. You’re her baby and she’s not letting go easily. Go make peace and I’ll sort through all of this.”

  “I can’t do that. I have somewhere else I need to go, and Mom already knows my decision.”

  “Phoenix…”

  He held up a hand. “I already heard it all from my brothers. I’m making decisions for my future and what’s right for me. I’m sorry my mom doesn’t agree. But I love Rosemary McCray, and I plan to marry her one way or another.”

  He walked out the door to his truck. Once inside, he called Ms. Henshaw’s number. It went to voice mail and he asked her to call him back. Then he headed for Rosie’s.

  As he crossed the cattle guard, he noticed Rosie’s truck was gone. He went around back and everything was quiet, except for the occasional neighing of the horses.

  A fresh roll of hay was in the corral, the automatic feeder was on and the barn door was open so the horses could get inside when they wanted. All signs Rosie had left and wasn’t planning on coming back anytime soon. But he could be wrong. He’d wait just in case.

  He looked toward the trailer where Rosie lived, and then to the water trough where she bathed because she loved baths. He planned to build her a house with the biggest tub he could find. She would never have to bathe in a water trough again.

  His cell dinged. He pulled it out and sat in a lawn chair they used in the yard when they watched Jake play with Dixie. It was a text from Gabe: Levi’s on the case. More later. Phoenix quickly texted back with a thank you.

  The cold north wind whipped around him, but he didn’t feel it. This was where he’d found happiness with Rosie. It was their private little world where hate and bitterness weren’t allowed. Only love that was now being tested by the strongest force there was—feuding families who could tear them apart.

  He sat in the chair feeling lonelier than he ever had in his whole life. He’d always had family around him, a supportive, loving family. Now he was alone, fighting for a woman he loved and a son who was his. He didn’t know if he could win this battle, but he would keep trying. He’d always heard that love worked miracles. He desperately needed a miracle.

  He didn’t know how long he sat there listening to the wind howl and watching the leaves dance in the breeze. The chill finally reached him, and he got up and walked to his truck. He slipped on his all-weather jacket and climbed inside. Sighing, he opened the glove compartment and pulled out their marriage license. With it in his hand, he soon fell asleep, and the buzz of his phone woke him.

  Hoping it was Rosie, he hurriedly clicked on. It was Ms. Henshaw. “I’m returning your call, Mr. Rebel?”

  “They took Jake without his favorite stuffed animal, his blanket, his jacket or his shoes. I have his things and I was hoping you could take them to him. They would make him more comfortable.”

  “As I’ve been told, they had to get the baby out as quickly as possible because you were resisting and they did what they had to at the time.”

  “They jerked my kid out of my arms. What did they expect me to do? Hand him over without any emotions?”

  “I know this is hard on you, but please be patient. The worst is yet to come. A judge will decide if Jake belongs with you or with his mother. You’ll have to face that.”

  He gritted his teeth. “Jake was so upset and I’m worried about him.”

  “Babies adjust quickly, and I’m sure Jake is fine. Once he gets with other kids and toys he’ll settle down.”

  “Have you spoken with Ms. Connors?”

  “No, and I’m sure she would’ve called if anything was wrong with Jake. Trust me, he’s playing with kids and having fun. You don’t have to worry.”

  “Oh, but I do worry, Ms. Henshaw. Jake had better be fine or you haven’t heard the last of me.” He laid his phone in the console and took a moment to cool down.

  A spotlight Rosie had installed on the property came on, distracting him. How long had he been sitting here? Picking up his phone again, he checked to see if Gabe had left any more messages. He hadn’t. That wasn’t good.

  He looked at the trailer. Rosie wasn’t coming home tonight. Once again, he called her and left a long message about what had happened and told her how much he loved her. Afterward he slipped the marriage license back into the glove compartment.

  Rosie, please come home.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Rosie drove and drove with no destination in mind. Dixie sat on the passenger side, staring out the window, barking occasionally at something that caught her eye. Rosie stopped in Gruene, Texas, a small town between Austin and San Antonio, located near the Guadalupe River. She’d been through here many times but had never visited. It boasted of having the oldest dance hall in Texas. Not that she was planning on dancing, but the little town looked interesting.

  She spent the day strolling through quaint antiques and specialty shops and eating barbeque in a small diner all by herself. It was lonely. For the first time she really knew what lonely was. She’d only thought she did before. There was a hole in her now that couldn’t be filled by anyone but Phoenix and Jake.

  After walking until her legs hurt, she decided to spend the night and rented a room in a Victorian cottage. It was a historical home and it was lovely, even though she h
ad to share a bath with another couple. At least she had a bathtub, and the other couple was out. She took advantage of it. She soaked in the claw-foot tub, thinking about her life and what she was going to do now.

  Tears rolled from her eyes. She needed a good cry, so she made no effort to stop them. Dixie whined on the rug on the floor and Rosie ignored her. She hated to have run out on Phoenix like that, but she needed time. The time was painful without him, though. She had to make a big decision: Could she live without Phoenix?

  Afterward she scrubbed her face, trying to erase the telltale signs of her meltdown. She then wrapped a towel around herself, scurried to her room and curled up on the bed. It was dark outside now and she didn’t turn on the light. She didn’t need it. Darkness was the blanket that covered her heart and soul, and by morning she would know what she had to do.

  With or without Phoenix.

  *

  PHOENIX SLEPT IN his truck at Rosie’s until about two that morning. He then drove home and fell into bed, exhausted beyond anything he’d ever felt. Rosie was gone and they’d taken his son. There was just no way to put a Band-Aid on a hurt that big. He slept restlessly with Dad-dy running through his mind like bits and pieces of a sad lullaby. He got up at five and stared at the empty crib. This was about the time Jake would crawl into bed with him. What must be going through his little mind now that his daddy wasn’t there? There would be no one to comfort him like Phoenix had. No one loved him like Phoenix, except maybe Rosie. Filled with renewed anger, he went to take a shower and then changed and got dressed for the day.

  He’d checked his phone first thing, and there had been no word from Rosie or Gabe. That bothered him, and he planned to call Gabe by seven. But first, he sat on his bed and left Rosie another message. He couldn’t understand why she wasn’t calling him back. Their goodbye wasn’t final. Not to him. She just had to call him. Obviously she wasn’t reading his messages or she would have called about Jake. He knew that beyond any doubt.