Emotionally Bulletproof--Scott's Story (Book 1)

by David Allen

  I think God has really blessed my business, I keep on getting recommended to new jobs and I’m only limited by myself. I think I should try to hire a couple of hands, and then maybe I can find more time to work on my marriage, and just supervise. Today I was talking with Timothy and he say’s I have a talent for leading, and he’s very pleased with how I’ve helped Scott. I think it’s probably the first time he’s ever really felt good about himself.

  Scott stopped reading to readjust a pillow underneath him.

  September 21, 1987. Scott went back to school today. Now he can only work part-time. He told me plain out that he didn’t want to go to school. I definitely need to hire some help now. I didn’t realize how much of a help he was until now, and the work just keeps coming.

  I went to lunch with Timothy today. I hadn’t talked with him for almost a week now. I told him about my wife and asked for prayer. I also told him I wanted to hire some new guys to work with me.

  We talked and there are two principles he said I needed. Number 1, getting the job done. He said as long as I did the job and did it well, I would do well in construction. He also said that I needed to get the job done for my wife, and if that meant spending time with her, I needed to make the time.

  And number 2, I need to have integrity, If I run my business with integrity, and am honest, I will do well. I also need to have integrity with my wife, and be honest and good to her.

  So I am making a mental note that I will have integrity in my business, and I will get the job done!

  Scott read the journal, every page up through December, pouring over every page. He only stopped twice to rearrange himself and finally to sit on the floor and lean his back against the bed.

  January 1st, 1988. I finally figured it out! I know what I’ve been missing out on! It’s having other people’s best interest in mind. I can’t believe I missed it. These last months have been busy and my business has grown to the point that I have three guys who work for me regularly now, but I’ve lost several key contracts that I was sure I’d have, and I’ve been wracking my brain, trying to figure out why. I emphasize heavily on having integrity with the guys, and we always have gotten the jobs done on time, but it just dawned on me. I’ve been losing customers because I haven’t had their best interest at heart. My marriage has been suffering because I don’t have my wife’s best interest at heart, even though I always have integrity and have been faithful to her… I suddenly get it! That’s why I have been losing so many relationships.

  So I talked with Timothy about it, and he kinda gently helped me discover what I was missing. It’s so wonderful to have a pastor mentor like him. Who knows where I’d be if it wasn’t for Timothy?

  I’ve also been mentoring my nephew, Scott, even though he probably doesn’t realize it. We’ve gotten closer recently. He’s opened up to me about how his dad is so hard on him. It’s been very frustrating, because whenever I teach Scott a Christian principle, like having integrity or something, my brother-in-law tells him how stupid it is, and to learn some real psychology. That’s difficult.

  January 4th 1988. My wife scares me right now. She’s been reading some new self-help books she got from her brother. She tells me they really focus on expressing yourself and how every feeling we have as humans is good. She even went so far as to tell me yesterday that people can tap into the universe and become like God, and there really isn’t a right and wrong, strictly speaking. We’ve been clashing a lot about that. Whenever I read something from the Bible, she gets angry at me. Our views are really clashing, but yet I can’t tell her that she’s wrong. Maybe I’m in the wrong. I don’t know…

  Scott closed the book. I think I have the answer now. I’ll go see what John says.

  He moved out of the bedroom and down the hall. John sat in an easy chair reading a book. “John,” Scott said, “I think I found those three principles.”

  John set his book down and looked up over the rims of his glasses. “You’ve been reading this whole time?” He glanced at the clock. “It’s almost 10 PM.”

  “I think they’re having integrity, getting the job done, and having people’s best interest in mind.” Scott counted them off on his fingers and looked hesitantly at John. “Am I right?”

  “Good job, good job.” John rose from his chair. “Scott, I want you to come see something.” He walked across the wooden floor and down the hall. Scott followed. “This is my study, and part time junk room.” He motioned to Scott to have a seat on a wooden stool on the floor. “I have studied and read several books on trust,” he said quietly. “And these last years since my brother’s death, I’ve studied every verse on trust I can find in the Bible. His journal helped me discover what I now know. The Bible says a lot about trust, but boiled down, it comes to three main principles. Can I see that stool you’re sitting on?”

  Scott stood up, uncertain, and handed the stool to his uncle. John held it up.

  “See, it has three legs.” He jiggled one leg until it popped out. “Sit on this.” He handed the chair back to Scott.

  Scott sat unevenly on the chair, but after a second he found his balance and managed to stop swaying.

  “You’re sitting how a lot of people are,” John said. “You can trust them pretty well in two areas, like if they get the job done and have integrity. But then something comes along where they have to choose between themselves and your best interest, and you know what happens?”

  Scott shook his head. John stepped forward and gave him a gentle shove. The stool fell from under him and he tumbled to the carpet.

  “That’s what happens.” John reached out a hand. “Let me help you up. You want to try it again?” he asked, laughing. “Only this time with one leg?”

  Scott shook his head. “I think I already know what will happen.”

  John laughed. “That’s right. You may not even be able to balance, even without a shove.” John twisted the leg back into the stool’s seat. “Try it now.” Scott sat on the stool with all three legs, and John gave him the same gentle push. This time he only slightly rocked.

  “You see, to truly be trustworthy, you have to have all three legs of trust,” John said. “Most people usually are weak in at least one area.” He shrugged. “I’ll leave that for you to think about. If you find out where you’re weak, then you can improve and life will get much better for you.”

  “I think I know,” said Scott. “Kinda like this guy named Tony in Ebi. He was really good at getting the job done, and okay at integrity with most things. But he was so selfish, you couldn’t trust him.”

  “Didn’t have your best interest in mind.” John nodded. “Or how about this, you have a friend who wants to help you get money because you need it, and always follows through? So he’s good at getting the job done, and he wants to help you, so he has your best interest at heart.” John paused. “So he says, ‘Let’s rob a bank.’ See, he doesn’t have integrity so he’s going to get you hurt.”

  Scott nodded. “I see.”

  John raised his hand. “Now that’s an extreme example, but I wanted to make a contrast. Nobody can ever completely trust you unless you have all three. The only one who will only ever have the three legs of trust completely is God. He has your best interest at heart, he gets the job done and comes through a hundred percent of the time, and he has perfect integrity.” John leaned back, “I’ll get off my soapbox now.” He winked and gave Scott a friendly slap on the back. “Your probably tired, I’m sure…”

  *****

  Scott lay in bed that night, wondering. He kept going over and over the journal and what his uncle had said in his mind, until he fell into a troubled sleep.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  The morning sun broke through the curtains. Scott rose quickly from the blankets and rubbed his head. He had dreamed of Tony. He had been running behind him, chasing him down a white beach with a three-legged stool.

  He had just dressed and walked out when he heard the phone ring. He heard Ruth answer it.

  �
�Oh, yes I’ll see if Scott’s awake, hold on.” A second later, she stuck her head around the corner. “Oh, there you are, Scott. Laura’s on the phone for you.”

  Scott walked to the phone and lifted it to his ear. “Hello?”

  Laura’s voice was lively. “Hey, you early bird, It’s already 9:00.”

  “Well I was up last night…” Scott paused. “...reading the journal, so I have a good excuse.”

  Laura laughed. “That’s why I‘m calling. I was wondering if you want to get together and read some more.”

  Scott paused a second. “Sure, what time?” He tried to sound nonchalant.

  “How about lunch again? That will give you time to get your beauty sleep in.”

  “Hey! I need my beauty sleep. We aren’t all born equal!” He protested.

  “Okay I’ll see you then.” Laura laughed. “Bye.”

  He heard the phone click, and Scott turned away from the phone.

  In the kitchen he joined his Aunt Ruth for cheerios and fresh bananas.

  “So you’re going out again today?” Ruth was slicing a banana into her bowl.

  “Yes, for lunch,” he responded. “We’ve been reading through Matthew’s journal together.”

  Ruth lifted her eyes. “How’s that going?”

  “Good.” He obviously wasn’t giving enough information because Ruth probed further.

  “So would you consider Laura to be a ‘special friend.’” She pronounced the ‘special’ with a little lift at the end.

  “Why in the world would you think that?” Scott feigned surprise, then grew serious. “I don’t think so. We’re just friends, I think. I’m only going to be here for a little while anyways.” He shook his head again. “Just friends.”

  Ruth grew serious. “Just be careful,” she warned. “I know John talked to you about the three legs of trust last night, so just make sure you keep them all with her, and don’t give her an impression that isn’t true.” She laughed and flicked a Cheerio at Scott. “I’m just looking out for us girls, because you are just a fun, good looking guy, and I don’t want Laura to be hopelessly in love with you if you don’t feel the same.”

  He laughed. “Don’t worry about that.” But he thought about what she said.

  Later that morning, Scott wasn’t quite sure about the “just friends” thing. Ruth had gone to work, and left him in the quiet house, still an hour before Laura was picking him up.

  Maybe he was giving the wrong message. He thought about it and realized he was having mixed feelings himself. She was gorgeous, he couldn’t ignore that fact. Not that that was enough, but he had been having a lot of fun with her, too. Her bubbly teasing put him at ease. He hadn’t enjoyed talking to someone like her for a long time. He knew that for a fact.

  But then Scott thought back to Janet, No, no one could replace her. He would remain single forever! He shook his head. He needed to stop thinking about Laura. How ridiculous was that, anyways? She lived in Idaho and he in Alaska and he was leaving really soon. He shook his head, but the image of her smiling face and dark hair made him shake his head in frustration.

  “Stop brain! Stop!” Scott banged his head. “You’re just lonely and confused, get yourself under control, don’t let what Ruth said get you all wound up,” he ordered himself.

  Laura arrived right on time, 12:30. She didn’t help erase Scott’s opinion about how beautiful she was, either. When she stepped out of her truck in a cute green shirt and black shorts, she waved cheerily to him. Scott had hoped she wouldn’t see him standing there in the window, mouth agape, staring dumbly.

  “What am I doing?” He turned and pinched himself. “Get yourself together.”

  He met her at the door. “Let me grab the journal, come right in.” Scott beckoned. “I’ll be right back.” He turned and went down the hall, to return a moment later. “Let’s go!”

  “Why don’t we try something new and exciting today?” Laura asked. “We could try driving to the beach somewhere and finding a fun place to eat.”

  “Okay.” He nodded.

  “How’s your foot doing, by the way?” She glanced across the truck at Scott’s shoe.

  “Oh, it’s healing well, all closed up now. That cream’s doing magic. I think I’ll give it another day, and I’ll be good for swimming and sandals again.”

  “Be careful” Laura steered the truck around a corner. “That foot has given you too much trouble already.” She headed for the airbase gate.

  Before too long, they were driving through a lively little tourist section. Beach clubs, restaurants, and people walking, shopping in an open-air market.

  “This looks like a good spot.” Laura pulled the truck off into a café parking lot. “Why don’t we find a good little restaurant here and explore a little bit?

  They walked down the road and through a market. There were t-shirts, shells and colorful knickknacks spread out underneath a frond gazebo. Fresh mangos, pineapple and avocados where stacked in wooden boxes. Persistent vendors waved and beckoned.

  “Let’s go there.” Laura pointed. They made their way to a wooden patio overlooking the beach. Several food stands sold ice cream, hotdogs, burgers, lemonade, and fish and chips. Surfers and sun bathers stood in a few lines, and others sat licking ice cream cones and reading magazines.

  After ordering a couple of hotdogs, Scott found a table under the shade of a palm tree. It was right on the edge of the deck, overlooking the surf breaking across the sandy white beach.

  “Nice spot.” Laura sat across from Scott. “Doesn’t it make you just want to go grab a board right now and paddle out?”

  “It looks fun. We should do something like that.” Scott was watching two buff guys paddling surfboards out into the green water.

  “So you’ve read more of the journal, what did I miss?” Laura was rustling through the pages of the journal.

  Scott told her what he had read, and then about the three legs of trust and how John had given him an analogy of it.

  “I was really thinking about what my uncle said to me and I realized what my biggest weakness was,” he confided. “I struggle with getting the job done.” He shifted, feeling a little self-conscious. “I mean, I get things down, but I’m such an entrepreneur that I start way too many projects, get discouraged on them, and don’t finish what I start.” He paused and looked over the crashing waves for a long moment. “I’ve lost trust with several people because I’ll get really excited about something, say a new business idea, and talk them all up about it. Then a few months later, when nothing happens, they lose trust in me.” Scott rapped his fingers on the plastic table. “I really need to stop that.” He shook his head.

  Laura looked thoughtful. “It’s hard for me to admit this, but I think I struggle a lot with that last one your uncle discovered.” She paused. “What was it? Having peoples best interest at heart?” Scott nodded. “That’s it.” Laura bit her lip, “I think I’m pretty good at getting the job done, but I’m such a bulldog.” She shook her head. “I’ve hurt a lot of people while I’m doing things. That sure has made nursing harder.” She laughed. “The turf wars with other pissed-off hospital staff. You don’t want to hear about them, it’s ugly business.” Laura looked thoughtful. “I’m struggling because I think I pride myself on the fact that I’m so calloused. I mean, you need to be when you’re a nurse.” She seemed to be arguing with herself. “Though I think it’s good to be able to stand up for myself, I need to be more sensitive to the needs of people around me.” She nodded. “It’s hard for me to admit, but I think people could trust me a lot more if I did.”

  The two sat in silence, deep in thought. The wind rustled the palm fronds above them and the incessant screaming of gulls over the crash of breakers made a dim canopy of noise behind them.