Green Eyed Monster

by Ashley Antoinette

  “Okay, Ms. Morgan. I want to prepare you for what you are about to see. There is severe damage to your face. Healing the burns was only the first step. You have many more steps and face many more challenges on the road to recovery. You have to remember to be thankful to be alive right now. Don’t focus on how you look,” the doctor said, preparing her for the worst.

  Leah nodded her head and reached for the mirror that one of the nurses held in her hands. Her hands shook as she brought it up to her face. Nothing could have prepared her for the sight of her reflection. Her face was completely destroyed. The fire had eaten through her skin like moths on old fabric. She felt like a monster.

  “Get out!” Leah whispered.

  “It will get better. I’ve already begun discussing your case with the best plastic surgeon in the city,” the doctor explained as he tried to ease her worries.

  “Get out,” she repeated.

  The staff didn’t move. They all stood there with their stoic expressions.

  “Get out!” Leah screamed as she threw the mirror across the room, causing it to shatter into pieces. Finally the nurses hustled out of the room, fleeing from her outburst, but the doctor remained by her bedside.

  “It has only been a month since the fire. You have to give it time to heal. You are physically and emotionally damaged, Disaya. We are only trying to help you.”

  “I just need a moment to myself,” she replied as a tear fell from her eyes. She couldn’t even wipe it away because she was afraid to touch her own face.

  “I’ll do my rounds and be back in half an hour. I know how you feel, Disaya. Please try to stay optimistic.”

  Dr. Fannigan was her attending physician and had been with her every step of the way through her recovery. He stood tall, six feet two, with handsome all-American boy features and a slim yet athletic build. Surely in his prime he had been the captain of somebody’s Lacrosse team. With his Johns Hopkins medical degree and good looks, he was like a superstar amongst the many nurses and female doctors on staff. The slight gray that had begun to appear at his temples gave him a distinguished appearance. It was he who had saved her life. Had it not been for his experience and expertise, she would be lying in a shallow grave.

  Leah knew that she should be grateful for all of his efforts, but his calm tone was irritating her. He couldn’t possibly know how she felt. He had never been ugly in his entire life. Not even an old childhood scar marred his perfect exterior. The empathy he displayed was fabricated and made her even more insecure.

  Yes, she had asked for this, but the old adage of “be careful what you wish for” couldn’t be more true. Her skin was so badly seared that all that could be seen was pink flesh. The hair had been burned completely from one side of her head. Leah couldn’t help but think that this was God’s way of punishing her. She had felt the fires of hell, and He had scarred her for life. Was this His way of paying her back for all of her bad deeds?

  The doctor exited the room, leaving her to process her predicament.

  Fuck it, she thought as she climbed from the hospital bed. She walked to the attached bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. She wasn’t even recognizable, and her heart pounded furiously as she became overwhelmed with anger. Although her insides were spoiled and rotten, she had always been beautiful on the outside. Now her exterior matched the ugly intent of her heart.

  The only thing recognizable about Leah was her eyes, but it was the thing she hated most. They were the only thing left that could keep Leah from playing the role.

  Taking over YaYa’s identity wouldn’t be simple. She was lucky that she had gotten away with it thus far. YaYa’s beautiful, bright green eyes set her apart. Upon awakening in the hospital, Leah had been so heavily bandaged that her eyes were slightly hooded by the white gauze that protected her skin. Everyone was worried about her as she clung to her deathbed, and when she finally regained consciousness, they were too overjoyed with excitement to notice that she wasn’t who she claimed to be. Elaine and Slim could barely see her eyes, let alone distinguish their color. Her looks were completely destroyed, her voice raspy from the damage to her larynx and smoke inhalation. Everything was in her favor to become the new Disaya Morgan; the only thing in her way was the color of her own eyes.

  Because of this, Leah refused to see anyone. The only people who came in and out of her room were doctors and nurses. She had banned Slim, Elaine, and even Indie from stepping foot inside. Indie didn’t even get a chance to see her once he got out of jail. By the time he arrived at the hospital, Leah had asked everyone to leave before anyone could put two and two together. Now she was panicking. She had been so delusional before the fire that she had overlooked a critical piece of the puzzle.

  Leah had done too much plotting . . . so much scheming and lying to get to this point. She and YaYa had gone from fast friends to lovers to enemies within the blink of an eye. YaYa didn’t know that all along Leah was an unseen enemy from the past. They shared a father, a man who showed unbalanced favor toward YaYa, and Leah would always hate YaYa for his faults. The resentment that Leah harbored had pushed her over the edge. It had turned her into a woman obsessed.

  After being trapped in the deadly fire, she saw an opportunity to take YaYa’s place and finally live the life that she had always admired from afar. Burnt beyond repair, she knew that she could pass as YaYa . . . if it weren’t for those damn green eyes. How she had forgotten such a detail was beyond her, but her lies were too deep to retract them now. As every day passed, her risk of the truth being discovered grew.

  Luckily YaYa’s medical records hadn’t been faxed from New York, so the doctors had no clue that they were treating an imposter. It was just Leah’s luck that YaYa’s mother had been neglectful and other than her birth, no other doctor’s visits had been made. YaYa barely had a medical history. No vaccination records existed, no emergency hospital visits, no broken bones, nothing. It was as if YaYa had disappeared off the map until she gave birth to her daughter. Even still, the overcrowded state of New York was slow in forwarding the files to Texas. It was working in Leah’s favor, at least temporarily. Eventually those records would come, blood types would be compared, and faking would no longer be possible. Leah could feel the walls crumbling around her. As soon as those records arrived, her true identity would be discovered. She couldn’t let that happen under any circumstance.

  A knock on the door took her attention away from the mirror, and she slowly walked back toward her bed.

  “You should be in bed. There are nurses that can help you back and forth to the bathroom,” Dr. Fannigan said.

  “I’m fine. I can still piss on my own,” she remarked snidely. The mixed emotions she felt overwhelmed her as she meandered solemnly across the room. She didn’t know if she should be happy or sad. She finally had the chance to be YaYa, to know what it felt like to be loved like YaYa, to be catered to and doted over like YaYa. That part she was eager to experience, but she also mourned the fact that she would never be Leah Richards again. The knowledge that she would never look in the mirror and see her own beautiful face staring back at her made her chest sag with sadness. She would never be able to recognize herself. Whatever new face they gave her would look nothing like her old one. It was a large sacrifice, but one that she was willing to make.

  The fire had been a drastic turning point in her life. That girl had indeed died in the fire, so she had to become YaYa. If she didn’t, then she would be no one; she would become a girl with a hideous face and a lonely soul that no one could ever love. If Leah didn’t pull this off, things would go bad and life wouldn’t be worth living. Everything was riding on this.

  She was too far in to turn back. She had to be like a chameleon and adapt to her surroundings. She had to bury her true self if she wanted to move forward as YaYa. The first thing she had to do was change the color of her eyes.

  “Your entire family has called numerous times to check on you. You’ll be going home soon. They seem very concerned. I know that
your face looks bad, but once the burns completely heal we can begin the process of reconstructive and cosmetic surgery. I don’t think your family cares how you look. They’re just glad that you’re making progress. I think seeing them would help with your healing,” the doctor said.

  “I don’t want to see them. I don’t want to see anyone until after the surgery,” she said firmly. She climbed into bed, wincing as her healing flesh rubbed against the starchy white sheets. “When can I have that done? I need a new face, Dr. Fannigan. I can’t stay like this.”

  “I’ve already set up a consultation with a colleague of mine. Her name is Dr. Maroni, and she is the best cosmetic surgeon in the state. She will be able to answer all of your questions,” Dr. Fannigan said. He checked her vitals and then prepared to leave. “Is there anything else that’s bothering you?”

  “My eyes,” Leah answered. “My vision is kind of blurry. I wore prescription contacts before the fire. I’d like to order more. If I’m going to be stuck in this hospital bed, I at least need to be able to read a book to pass the time.” She gave him a friendly smile, showing him that she was in good spirits.

  Leah had been a master manipulator her entire life, and the doctor fell victim to her game with ease. “Of course. I’ll have one of the nurses take you to the ophthalmologist’s office on the eighth floor,” he replied. “Until then, try to rest and think about allowing your family to visit.”

  Leah nodded her head and replied, “I will. I promise I’ll think about it.”

  Chapter 3

  “She won’t see me,” Indie whispered as he sat behind the large executive desk and pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes in deep contemplation. “It’s been a month and I haven’t seen her face. She barely takes my calls. This shit is eating me alive, Ma. I just want to be there for her.”

  Elaine sat on the other side of the desk, listening to the pain in her son’s voice. His love for YaYa was frustrating. Even when the two of them got it right, it everything around them seemed to go wrong. It was as if the forces of the universe were plotting against them. YaYa and Indie’s flame never stayed lit for long.

  YaYa’s refusal to see Indie tore him apart, and his turmoil could be felt by everyone around him. His patience was nonexistent nowadays, and there was always a heavy tension whenever he entered the room. No one knew how to approach him; everyone was on pins and needles because his stress level was at an all-time high. Indie had always been cool under pressure, but when the love of his life was facing the biggest battle of all, he felt useless. She was shutting him out, and it felt as if he was losing her, as if she somehow blamed him for her life falling apart. They had found and lost each other too many times before. He knew what it felt like to be without her. Life without her in it was one that was half fulfilled. He wanted nothing more than to be by her bedside as she healed, but she wouldn’t allow it. The separation was torture.

  “She has been through a lot, Indie. She will come around. Give this time. That girl loves you and she loves Skylar. When she is ready she will call you,” Elaine said.

  Skylar’s cries broke through the air and Elaine stood to her feet. “I’ll go check on her,” she said as she hurried from the room.

  Indie stood to his feet and sighed heavily. He had the weight of the world resting on his shoulders. Everything was up in the air. His business in the streets was at a standstill. The dismissal of his case had been a bad look for the DEA, Agent Norris in particular, and ever since the day he walked out of prison a free man he had been under tight scrutiny. Norris had a personal score to settle with Indie after he was downgraded in rank because of the botched case. Indie could feel eyes on him every time he left the house. He could practically hear the cameras flicking as the feds snapped pictures of everyone coming and going from his residence.

  They were trying to build a case around him, which meant Indie had to keep his nose clean. Hustling wasn’t an option. He was hot, and he knew that although he had a crazy connect with Zya, she wouldn’t dare deal with him as long as the federales were lurking in his back yard. He wouldn’t even put her at risk in such a way. She had reached out to him numerous times since his release, but Indie always rejected the call. If he were a fish on the federal scale, than Zya would be a whale. She was a prize catch, and he refused to lead Norris to her front door. He was too noble to contribute to Zya’s downfall. He only hoped that she got the hint and stopped calling.

  Until things cooled off, Indie would have to go legit, and with the limited funds he had left that would be a daunting task. Nobody wanted to deal with a businessman with large plans, yet small pockets. He had to have something to bring to the table. His case, YaYa’s medical bills, and repaying his debt to Zya after Khi-P had tried to back door him, had left his finances in a delicate state. Not to mention the extra security he had hired since bringing his daughter home. He paid goons around the clock to keep his home and his family secure. If he had taken that precaution when he first brought YaYa to Houston, then Leah would have never been able to get close enough to touch his queen. Skylar’s kidnapping would never have happened. If he had been more cautious, YaYa would never have gotten caught up in a game of cat and mouse. None of the chaos would have occurred.

  He was an intelligent man and never made the same mistake twice. There was money left but not much; a quarter-million dollars would only last him so long. He had to play his cards right and flip his funds before they ran dry. He needed the attention off of him so that he could get back to doing what he did best: moving weight. He had never been a little nigga and he never would be. As long as there was air in his lungs he would be a boss.

  YaYa opened her eyes and was immediately blinded by the sunlight that streamed into the room through the open terrace. A month was a long time to be cloaked in darkness. She hadn’t seen the sun in quite some time, and its brightness caused her to squint.

  The sheer curtains blew lightly as a cool breeze spread throughout the room. Where am I? she thought as she looked around in confusion. The immaculate room was a far cry from the white walls of a hospital. The beautiful travertine floor and expensive furnishings were too exquisite for the place to be any type of medical facility. She looked at her arm at the IV that had been placed into her veins. Undoubtedly she was in someone’s home and they had taken care of her, but whose?

  YaYa attempted to speak but quickly found that her throat was raw and scratchy. She couldn’t speak beyond a whisper as she tried to call for help. She felt weak, extremely weak, as she sat up in the bed. Her head spun as dizziness overcame her.

  She gripped the sheets that covered her legs and closed her eyes as she inhaled deeply, trying to stop the room from spinning. Her hands felt raw, and when she looked at them she noticed her injuries for the first time. Burns covered her hands. A gruesome pattern of brown skin and pink flesh made her stomach turn. Tears filled her eyes and she gasped as she held her hands out in front of her. She was so shocked that she didn’t even hear anyone enter the room.

  “You’re awake,” Zya exclaimed in surprise. “I know you have a lot of questions and I’ll answer them all, but first let’s get the doctor in here to make sure that you are okay.”

  YaYa’s mouth hung wide open as she nodded her head obediently. She didn’t know what to say. Zya was the last face that she had expected to see. Why did she bring me here? Where is Indie? My daughter? she thought. Images of the fire popped into her mind as everything came rushing back to her. I almost died! Where is my daughter?

  The thought of Skylar caused YaYa to rise out of the bed. She pulled the IV from her arm in a panic, ignoring the pain and the slight blood as she ripped it out improperly. She climbed from the bed, legs wobbly from being immobile for so long. She took one step, her bones creaking, aching as her knees shook like fragile limbs on a tree. Before she could fall she gripped the bed and leaned her weight on it, breathing heavily as exhaustion plagued her.

  Zya and the doctor entered the room.

  “YaYa!” she
yelled as they both rushed to her side. They steadied her and helped her sit on the bed.

  “Where is my daughter?” she asked. “She was in that house with me. Is she—”

  “No . . . no, she’s not dead, YaYa,” Zya said calmly. “Your daughter is fine. She is with Indie.”

  “Why am I not with Indie? What is going on?” she asked. “Where the fuck am I?” YaYa was hysterical as she thought of her family. “Why am I here with you?”

  “I’ll explain everything, YaYa. The doctor is going to make sure everything is okay and then we’ll talk,” Zya said. “First you need to rest.” Zya nodded to the doctor. They seemed to have an understanding of what YaYa needed without even asking her.

  The last thing on YaYa’s mind was sleep. She wanted answers, she wanted her daughter, she wanted to avoid the darkness . . . the hell that she had just awoken from.

  YaYa watched Zya step back as the doctor stuck her with a needle. Within moments she felt a calm wash over her. Everything in the room seemed to slow down. She gripped the doctor’s forearm as he guided her gently back onto the pillow. Her eyelids felt as if they weighed a ton. She tried to stay alert, but the sandman pulled them down slowly.

  She fought the slumber as long as she could. YaYa had already missed too much. She knew too little. The last thing she wanted to do was sleep, but as the drug took its course through her veins, she slowly slipped back into the darkness and said a temporary good-bye to the world.

  YaYa awoke at dusk. With a heavy heart and a mind full of questions, she sat up. The shot the doctor had given her had mellowed her out, and she groaned as she looked around the room. She found Zya standing near the bay window with a glass of wine in one hand as she peered out at her vast estate.