Finding the Way Back

by Jill Bisker

  I gently lifted the lid. It was lined with shattered silk material that had once been a pretty blue with an interwoven black design. On the top was an old 78 rpm record, broken in many pieces. Why would someone save a broken record? Finding the piece with the label on it I read the name Vera Lynn. That name was familiar. The name of the song on the A side was ‘We’ll Meet Again’. I brought the record out to the bedroom and interrupted their discussion. “Do any of you remember the Vera Lynn song We’ll Meet Again?”

  My mother came over to take the piece out of my hand. “Oh my goodness, I remember our mother playing this over and over and singing along with it at times when our father was out, which was most nights. I would hear it as I went to sleep. Mom had such a lovely voice, soft and lilting.”

  “I don’t think I remember the song but I do remember her singing,” Aunt Shelly said.

  “It must have meant something special to her that she kept the record even after it broke,” Connie said. An unexpected knock on the front door made us all jump and we laughed nervously.

  “That must be Emmett and crew. I’ll go let them in,” Connie said, walking out the door.

  “You all can go down, I’ll quickly hang everything back up,” I replied. They all walked out as I started hanging up my grandmother’s clothes. I thought about Emmett downstairs and started getting nervous. I didn’t know what was wrong with me—I never felt this way about anyone before. Did Simon used to make me feel like this? I couldn’t remember but I didn’t think so. The small closet began to feel hot and closed in, and as I got excited I became a little breathless. I took a few deep breaths to fight off a feeling of dizziness. I couldn’t seem to make myself not feel the excitement that rose in me just thinking about him. He was just an ordinary guy—what was wrong with me? No getting involved, I promised myself, unsure if it was a promise I could keep.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Hearing everyone downstairs setting up, I rushed into the bathroom to make myself more presentable. A little makeup and lip gloss, take out the braid and fluff my hair and I was ready.

  I carefully went down the stairs. I would be calm and collected. Taking another deep breath I tried to steady my heartbeat. My stomach felt like it was in knots. I waited for the strange feeling to come again on the steps and was relieved when it didn’t.

  The living room was packed when I entered. My stomach hit the floor. Standing next to Emmett were two raven-haired beauties. Oh God, Melanie Thomas and her sister Judith. Melanie was looking up at Emmett like he was the last Oreo in the pack.

  Seeing Connie in the kitchen I turned and marched up to her. “What is she doing here?” I asked, bristling up.

  “I didn’t know she was coming. It was supposed to be just Judith.” Connie continued wiping down the countertops.

  “Why would Judith come along?” I asked putting my hands on my hips.

  “I asked her to come. She’s Glen’s girlfriend. She’s the one who works with energy,” Connie said as if that answered all questions.

  “What do you mean she works with energy? She’s with the electric company?”

  “No, like everyone and everything is made of energy. She’s like some kind of spiritual healer or whatever they call it. She’s into all that new age stuff like crystals, yoga, tai chi, all that stuff. She sometimes smudges houses when people move into a new home, well not a new home, an old home that’s new to them.” I knew she was trying to throw me off with her rambling but I wouldn’t be set off track.

  “Smudges? What kind of hocus-pocus is that?”

  “Now remember, you didn’t believe in ghosts at first either. Let’s give her a chance. She clears bad energy out of houses. Think about it, Laney. We’re in unknown territory here. We can use all the help we can get,” Connie pleaded. “I asked Emmett about it and he was fine with it.”

  “Fine, but why did she have to bring Melanie?”

  “You know how it is. I’m sure Melanie heard what she was doing and didn’t want to miss anything. Plus, she probably heard Emmett was going to be here and she’s been trying to land that fish for ages.”

  “Melanie and Emmett? I thought she was after some professor.” This was the last thing I needed.

  “I think she’s into sheer number of conquests. Once she has them, she loses interest. As far as I know, he isn’t interested, but you know Melanie. She always gets what she wants and she wants Emmett.”

  Maybe I didn’t actually see red but there was pink around the edges of my vision as I saw Melanie sucking up to Emmett. Worse yet, Emmett didn’t seem to mind. Men, I harrumphed to myself.

  Stalking out to the living room, I was determined to be the epitome of grace and sweetness. Melanie was dressed in spray-on jeans and a shirt cut so low I could almost pick the lint out of her belly button. I had to admit I was envious of the amount of cleavage she could flash.

  “Hi guys, Melanie, Judith,” I greeted the group.

  “Laney. So good to see you again so soon,” Melanie said sweetly, in a sick sort of way.

  “Hi Laney,” Judith said. Her greeting seemed more sincere as she reached out and hugged me. “I heard you were back. I was hoping to see you and Connie.”

  Judith had always been friendly and kind. I could never understand how she and Melanie got to be so different. She was as beautiful as her sister, but she was always more understated and elegant. You could tell she didn’t think she had anything to prove.

  “So you are here to chase away our ghost?” I asked, somewhat facetiously, not wanting to sound too serious.

  “I’m here to help you cleanse the spirits and light the house, increasing the positive energy flow and removing the negative,” she answered softly. “I know most people think this is witchcraft or some kind of quackery, but Native Americans have practiced these rituals for a very long time. To them it is a very real and natural process for healing, growth and spiritual awakening.”

  “Well, at this point, I’m willing to try anything,” I answered, smiling and welcomed her into the living room. My recent encounters had made me aware that I shouldn’t discount anything out of hand.

  Just then, my mother and aunt clomped down the stairs and entered the room, squabbling about something. “That’s just not true, Glen Campbell was never with the Beach Boys,” my mom was saying.

  “It was only a short while, but it is true. You just don’t like to be wrong about anything,” my aunt answered.

  “Hello everyone, we’re here,” my mom announced. Making an effort not to roll my eyes, I checked out the two women’s outfits. Both wore green camouflage fatigue pants, which I recognized as belonging to my father, black turtlenecks and adorable, little combat boots.

  “You went and changed? Nice outfit, Mom. Where’d you get the boots?” I asked.

  “We brought a change of clothes with us for tonight’s activity,” Mom answered. There’s an Army-Navy surplus store in Maplewood. You wouldn’t believe the things they have there.”

  “I can believe. You didn’t bring any live ammo, did you?”

  “I’d have to check, you know there are a lot of pockets in these pants.”

  Everyone was feeling pretty upbeat; it was getting to be quite the party atmosphere. I doubted that any ghosts would want to be a part of this revelry.

  While the guys finished setting up their equipment for later in the evening, the rest of us sat down in the living room. Emmett excused himself from us to go help Dean and Glen with the gear.

  “So how do you go about doing the smudging?” I asked Judith after we were all comfortable.

  “I’m sorry, but can you tell me where your restroom is?” Melanie interrupted.

  I was sure she was just going to embark on a trek to find Emmett, but I couldn’t be outright rude without looking jealous, so I indicated the bathroom off the kitchen and kind of hoped a ghost would jump her.

  “Well, we start with a prayer,” Judith began, placing her hands in an almost universal sign of prayer, with her fingers pointin
g to the ceiling. “It’s important that we keep an open, positive heart. We need to show reverence and respect for those we are attempting to contact, and for the ritual itself.” Her voice was soothing and melodic. “We burn the sage, and then we take the smoke in our hands and pass it over our bodies. Then we walk from room to room, pushing the smoke into corners and focusing more effort on any areas where you’ve had unpleasant experiences. After that step is complete, we each take a candle and bring the light to each dark corner—promoting goodness and positive energy to every room.” As she spoke, Judith reached into several tote bags she brought along and pulled out bundles of dried sage, several handfuls of crystals, some large feathers and a gray stone bowl. We watched as she first placed a clear crystal in each corner of the room and one in the center. She put the sage and the bowl on the coffee table in front of the couch and looked up at my mom and Aunt Shelly in uncertainty. “Is something wrong?”

  They sat looking uncomfortable and glancing at each other nervously. “I was just thinking,” my mom said, looking at Judith candidly. “If our mother is here, will this process we’re going to do cause her harm or hurt her spirit in any way?” Aunt Shelly nodded anxiously. She was apparently having the same concern.

  “Oh, thank you for asking so I can clarify. No harm will come to any spirit who may be here. This is not an exorcism in the sense of forcing a spirit out or fighting it. No, this is merely a clearing of negative energies, whatever they may be. If there are spirits here who are disturbed, there must be a reason. The Great Spirit, or God, or the Universe, whatever your perception of a Higher Power, knows what you are trying to accomplish. So you can’t do it ‘wrong’ or unintentionally cause harm. I truly believe this will help whoever is restless to move on.”

  Tess and Shelly looked at each other apprehensively, but acquiesced. “If you’re sure of that, then we are willing to participate,” Aunt Shelly said, leaning back into the sofa.

  As we ended the discussion, Emmett, Melanie, Glen and Dean walked back into the room. I noticed Melanie standing virtually on Emmett’s feet.

  “Everyone please stand,” Judith began. “Let’s all take a deep breath and form into a circle.” Everyone tried to cram into the small space, making a variation of a circle. Melanie wove her way around to end up standing near Emmett. “Try to clear your mind of any doubts, worries or anxieties. You can close your eyes or leave them open as you wish. Attune yourself to the air flowing in and out of your lungs.” I looked at Aunt Shelly, who was looking at my mom, who was looking at me. I looked at Connie who sniffed and wrinkled her nose at me then smiled. I closed my eyes and put them all out of my mind.

  “I invoke the light of the Power within us to illuminate our actions and to ease our thoughts. May we channel Your will and bring peace.” Judith lit one of the bundles over the stone bowl and blew on it, extinguishing the flames but letting the tips smolder. With a feather she brought some of the smoke towards her body. She then took the sage and walked up to each of us, using the feather to push smoke around us. She lit four more bundles then told us to split into groups of two. “Walk into every room and closet and waft the smoke into all the spaces. Move around each room from left to right. Try to keep your minds clear, thinking only of cleansing and release.”

  “Laney, I’d like you to go upstairs with me so you can show me all the places where you’ve had experiences,” Emmett requested, indicating I go ahead of him.

  My mother and aunt went towards the study, Connie and Dean went towards the stairway to the basement, and Judith and Glen stayed in the living room. Melanie gave Emmett and me a sullen look and plunked herself down on the couch. Apparently she didn’t want to play if the game wasn’t going her way. “I’ll stay here with Judith,” she said.

  Emmett motioned for me to go first up the stairs. “Have you done this sort of thing before?” I asked him nervously, trying not to think of the view he would have. It reminded me that I needed to start working out, lunges or squats or something.

  “I have,” he began tentatively.

  “And? Does it work? Or is this just a bunch of smoke and mysticism?”

  “I don’t like to judge anything too harshly, because I think there are a lot of things in the world that we don’t fully understand. And I definitely don’t want to doubt something when we’re in the middle of doing it. I do believe that when a group of people come together for a common purpose that there is a synergy that occurs where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. If you add to that the possibility that some individuals have a greater affinity with the spiritual, then, yes, I do believe there can be an effect.” We paused as we got near the top of the stairs. “Connie said you felt something here on the stairs. Do you remember where it was?”

  “It was right about there, about two steps down.” He moved the sage from left to right several times in the area. There weren’t enough feathers for everyone so we used our hands to waft the smoke.

  We continued down the hall and into my bedroom, and I suddenly felt shy. A bedroom is such an intimate place and I felt uncomfortable being there with someone I was so attracted to.

  “Wow, you guys have made a lot of progress with cleaning the place out,” he said, glancing about the room.

  “It’s a lot of work but it’s really been fun. That reminds me. It would really help us out if you would take those boxes near the top of the stairs down tonight. They’re things we are planning to sell.”

  “Did you find anything interesting or fun?” he asked, moving past the bed to start smudging in the far corner as I followed behind him.

  “Yes, all kinds of great girlie stuff. Most of my grandmother’s things were still in her closet, too—purses, hats, gloves, clothes. There were other things too. It was interesting to find some of things my grandfather collected. We found four boxes of comic books.”

  “You’re kidding!” Emmett exclaimed wafting the smoke above some boxes. “I would love to see those. I’ve collected comic books since I was a kid. I could help you figure out the value of them. I’d probably even buy some of them. Don’t worry, I’m honest to a fault and won’t try to rip you off.” He winked at me and I felt my blood pressure go up.

  “Really? That would be very helpful.” Anything to spend more time with you, I added silently. I needed to be careful. I almost said that out loud.

  We were almost finished smudging the room when we heard a thump come from inside my grandmother’s closet. Emmett put his arm out to stop me from going first and started walking toward the door. He opened it slowly and we saw a purse lying on the floor. I flicked on the light and we both walked in. He leaned down to pick up the purse when the door slammed shut behind me. I turned and tried to turn the handle but it was stuck.

  “Here let me try. Handing me the sage he had to brush up next to me to get to the door. The smoke began filling the small space. I was suddenly sweating again. He got to the door and started trying to rotate the handle but it wasn’t budging.

  “That’s odd. This door needs a key to lock it so it can’t be that.” He pounded on the edges of the door several times in an effort to force it open.

  Without warning the light went out. I gasped, dropping the sage and grabbing the back of his shirt. “I know it sounds crazy but I have a huge fear of the dark, especially in closed-in places,” I said, struggling to breathe.

  “I’m having a little trouble breathing too with this smoke and you holding my shirt that tight.” He loosened my hands and turned around to face me, pulled me into his arms and kissed my forehead. “You’re fine. Don’t worry, we can just yell and someone will be right up.”

  My heartbeat went up but it was no longer because of the dark. I could feel his chest hard against mine and could smell his aftershave, the musky aroma having a very different effect from the sage. I was almost dizzy for a moment when I felt his lips touch mine tentatively.

  My hands went around his back and I pulled him even closer, returning the kiss more ardently than I expected. My li
ps parted and his tongue brushed the tip of mine. I wasn’t even thinking anymore. I lost myself in the moment, my body tingling beneath his touch.

  Unexpectedly the light was on and the door was thrown open. “I heard the door slam and then some pounding so I wondered if something had happened,” my mother said as she and Aunt Shelly stood there peering in at us. “Oops!” she exclaimed then slammed the door shut again.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Emmett and I sprang away from one another, our eyes blinking in the light. I could hear my mother and aunt giggling on the other side of the door as they walked away, their combat boots making a loud retreat across the floor.

  “I suppose we should go out there,” Emmett said, grinning sheepishly at me.

  “Yeah, I guess so.” I turned around to find the sage I’d dropped when the light had gone out and made sure nothing was catching on fire. I picked it up then heard Emmett open the door.

  “Okay, now what were we doing?” he asked.

  “We got locked in the closet. Did you forget?” I laughed.

  “No, of course not. I’m just wondering what to do next. It feels like we should have cameras and microphones running full-time here. There is a lot of activity.” His focus was back on the paranormal, and I wasn’t sure if I should be relieved or disappointed. At least we didn’t have to talk about what just happened between us in the closet.

  “I’m kind of glad there weren’t cameras in there, if you know what I mean,” I answered. “Anyway, it sounds like everyone is gathering in the living room again. We should go down and see if all the rooms have been covered.” The moment had passed, and I was disappointed that we would have to go back and join the rest of the group.