Finding the Way Back

by Jill Bisker

  Glen reached out his hand. “Slide the clock here, I want to look at it.” I stood up and carefully put the clock on a towel and slid it across the table. Glen and Dean leaned in to poke and prod at the workings.

  “Don’t shake it,” I said. “Even though it doesn’t work, shaking the pendulum could damage it irreparably.”

  Glen continued looking at it for a short while then closed it up again. “You’ll have to have a professional look at it. It doesn’t look damaged so it may only need a small adjustment.”

  “What do you think of cleaning out some things from the basement?” Connie asked. “Most of the stuff down there is garbage and it would waste time until nightfall. If we have the séance there we’ll need room to move around. And as a bonus, we have three strong men here to help carry stuff out. If all of us are down there I doubt anything will happen.”

  “Great idea,” my mom agreed enthusiastically, looking over at the three strong men who could do her bidding.

  “If everyone’s done with lunch, let’s get cracking,” my aunt added.

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  I let everyone go ahead of me downstairs. I wasn’t looking forward to the prospect of being in the basement again but I needed to be able to go there if I was going to continue living in the house. I fiddled around in the kitchen, wiping up the countertops and table, dragging my feet and wishing I didn’t have to go down those steps.

  Connie noticed I wasn’t with them and hurried up the steps to find me. “Laney, remember, never alone.” She gave me her sternest mother look and motioned for me to go down in front of her.

  I picked up a flashlight from the counter on the way to the stairs. I didn’t know if anyone else had one but I wasn’t going to be stuck without light even if the seven of us were together. I stood at the top of the stairs looking down into the dank basement. It was almost as if I could feel despair and loneliness rolling up to meet me. My mother had always told me my imagination was one of my strongest traits, but today I wished that weren’t true. I forced all my dark thoughts away and tried to quickly immerse myself into the room, like jumping into the deep end of a cold pool.

  Dean gave me a thumbs up as I made it to the bottom of the stairs and looked around. Emmett came over and put an arm around my shoulders. “Don’t worry. Nothing will happen to you while we’re here.”

  There was so much to do, it was as if no one knew where to start. Surveying the mountain of work, I picked up an old lantern that was sitting atop a wooden trunk. “It looks like some of this stuff might be worth selling. Why don’t we pile it in the garage? I wanted to move the car out anyway.”

  “I like that idea,” Emmett said. “I can move the car out.”

  “I’ll go with him, just in case it doesn’t start,” Dean said. “Where are the keys?”

  “I’ll get them,” my mother replied, following the men upstairs.

  Connie, my aunt and I shared a smile. “They don’t miss a chance with cars do they?” I asked as we snickered.

  “Hey, still in the room,” Glen said from the corner. That was the trouble with Glen; he was so quiet we always forgot he was around.

  “Sorry,” I said, but there wasn’t much sincerity in the word. We laughed again; it seemed to lighten the pall that threatened to envelop me.

  My mother clattered back down the stairs with Dean in tow. “It started right up. I asked Emmett to go give it a wash.”

  I shivered, remembering the last time I’d been in the garage. “Is he going to vacuum it also?”

  “Not sure,” she replied, leaning over to open a box. “This looks like some kind of tools.” She motioned Dean over to take a look. “What do you think?”

  “Looks like old planers and sanding materials,” he said, looking inside.

  I found myself still holding the lantern, watching everyone else work, but my heart just wasn’t in picking through this mountain of trash. It was hard to think of anything else until we solved the ghost problem.

  “I’ll take this to the garage,” I said, making my way to the stairs and running up quickly when no one objected.

  I walked out to the garage just as Emmett was getting into the car. He waved when he saw me. “What do you say we play a little hooky? Get in.”

  “Sounds great to me,” I said, suddenly smiling. I ran into the garage to place the lantern on a shelf. Bounding into the car, I took a huge breath and let it out. Freedom!

  Emmett took off in a swirl of dust, and I felt like a teenager again. He put down the top and we drove around town as the wind blew the hair out of my messy bun. I laughed and sat back, enjoying the sunshine and the feeling of escape. West Acre wasn’t that big so we knew we’d have to return to the house soon.

  It was a short respite but I felt like a new person. We stopped at the gas station in town to get a car wash and Emmett put the top up. I’d never liked car washes. They made me feel claustrophobic and nervous with all the moving brushes and water spraying everywhere. Our town had a newer no-touch style which was a little better, not as many moving parts but still claustrophobic. But it sure was cozy to be locked in the dark interior with Emmett at my side.

  “We should bring ice cream bars home to the crew,” I decided as we exited the car wash.

  “Good idea,” Emmett agreed. “I love my ice cream.”

  We stopped at the local DQ and picked up a box of Dilly Bars before returning to the house. Everyone was out in the yard, sitting on some old wooden folding chairs and faded lawn chairs they found. Glen was sitting on a wooden box.

  “I knew you’d escaped,” Connie said as I got out of the car.

  I smiled holding up the treats. “But look what we have. I come in peace to bring you ice cream.” It seemed to do the trick in getting everyone to forgive us as we passed out the ice cream.

  “I see you’ve brought some stuff up,” Emmett said, pointing his Dilly Bar at the items everyone was sitting on.

  “Oh, we saved plenty of the work for you, buddy,” Dean replied.

  “I figured you would.”

  After the snack we filed back into the house and down the stairs. They had made some progress working through the mountain of items but there was still plenty to do. However, I felt renewed and dove into the work, grabbing an old oil heater and hauling it out to the garage.

  Like a human escalator, we were a continuous stream of movement up and down the stairs, dragging things out and setting them in the back yard or garage. I came upon a large wooden trunk and waited for Emmett and Dean to return so they could lift it together.

  “You could fit a body in this trunk,” Emmett noticed as he tried to heft his side.

  “My God, what’s in this thing? We’re going to have to empty it before we move it,” Dean said, pulling on the handle unsuccessfully.

  “It’s locked, and I’m not sure where the key is,” I said. “We may just have to break it open.”

  “Laney, remember all those keys we found,” Connie said coming up to look at the trunk. “We should try those. Hey, this is a great trunk. I would love to sand it down, and put firewood or something in it upstairs in the living room.”

  “Why don’t we leave it until last,” my mother advised, coming up behind us.

  We almost had the place empty and I could see my mother and aunt waning. “That’s probably enough for now,” I suggested. “Let’s go take a break.”

  Grunts and groans greeted my suggestion. Trudging up to the living room I plopped down and sprawled across the middle of the floor to stretch my back.

  “What are you doing? Are you okay?” Emmett asked, concerned, coming to stand over me.

  “I’m fine,” I insisted. “My back is just a tad sore.”

  “Laney, the floor is filthy,” my mother protested.

  “Well, I’m not exactly fresh as a daisy either. Please, lying on a flat surface helps relax my back.”

  Rolling her eyes, my mother went back out to the kitchen where she could complain about me to my aunt. I closed my
eyes then brought my knees up to my chest to stretch my lower back.

  Connie walked in holding the clock, moving slowly so as not to shake it too much. “I’m going to put this on the mantle so nothing can happen to it.”

  “Can I help you with that?” Dean asked, moving to take it from Connie.

  “I’m okay,” she said lifting the clock towards the mantle. “Well, maybe you could help me.”

  “Don’t step on me,” I called from the floor underneath them, watching with fascination, trying to stay still and out of the way so they wouldn’t drop it. I looked up as it was almost directly above my head. “Hey, wait. There’s a paper stuck to the bottom.”

  Connie and Dean stopped and held the clock uncomfortably between the two of them. I slowly got to my knees so I wouldn’t upset their hold and pulled at the tape that was holding it in place. It looked like a plain piece of brown construction paper, the kind used by children to cut out turkeys in the shape of their hands. The tape was pulling away from the wood on the one side, but I had to hook my fingernail under it on the other to peel it back. I didn’t want to ruin whatever it was, even if it just turned out to be an old invoice. I finally got it separated so Connie and Dean could rest the clock on the mantel.

  Taped to the other side of the brown piece of paper was a folded, yellowed sheet. Right away, I wondered if this was what my grandmother had wanted me to find when she said ‘find the clock.’ “There’s something here,” I said to the others.

  We gathered around the coffee table and looked at the paper in my hand. I was almost afraid to open it. “It looks like a note,” I said excitedly as I laid it flat on the table. I carefully separated the note from the construction paper and unfolded it. The ink had faded but you could still read the faint writing in a beautiful old-fashioned script.

  My dearest Teo,

  I find my thoughts are all of you lately. Our fun, as you used to say, has been all I think of. I must beg you to meet me and promise to be mine. I know your family may not be happy with your choice but I will forever endeavor to be worthy of you and your love. It will be difficult for a while, I don’t have much to offer you besides two strong arms to hold you, but I know we have a great future in store.

  Meet me at our place tomorrow night that we may forever be together. I’ll be there at seven and will wait until midnight. If you don’t come, I will understand, I will go away, never to return to bother you.

  All my love,

  Quentin

  There were smudges on the paper that looked as if someone had cried while reading it. I looked up at my mother, and there were tears in her eyes.

  “Why didn’t she meet him?” she said. “Everyone thought he had run out on her but really, she didn’t go to him. Why?”

  I got up and put my arms around her. “I don’t know, Mom. She may not have known she was pregnant yet when she got this. Perhaps she couldn’t go against her family wishes. After all, even he knew he wasn’t a popular choice. Then she may not have known how to find him later, or it was too difficult for her to run after him. I think she was trying to tell us something by letting us know, but I’m not sure what it was. Maybe she’s trying to clear his name for some reason, trying to let us know it wasn’t his fault. Maybe that’s why she can’t go on yet.”

  My mother regained her composure and wiped her eyes. “It’s so confusing. Maybe we got the story wrong all these years. Maybe Quentin didn’t just run out on her. But why didn’t she go with him?”

  “We’ll have to keep looking for more information. If this letter is here, maybe we haven’t found everything. I do feel like we’re getting closer to some answers though,” I said with more hope than I really had. “I’m not ready to quit. If anything it makes me more eager to continue. There’s a whole lot in this house that we haven’t looked at yet.”

  It was difficult to believe that after so many years we would be able to find the truth and get to the bottom of this mystery. But if it could be done, I was determined to do it.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  I feared the coming evening would be difficult and I felt a growing sense of dread in the pit of my stomach. Making a cup of peppermint tea to settle my nausea, I walked to the living room and leaned against the wall to listen to the war counsel.

  Emmett, Dean, and Glen were grouped to one side on folding chairs while my mother, aunt, and Connie sat across from them on the sofa and recliner respectively. I could almost see the nervous energy wafting off the group like heat waves off of black tar asphalt. Connie was bouncing her knee up and down, my mother was kneading her armrest—everyone seemed to be in some variation of jittery motion that gave away their restlessness.

  I took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. All day there was a tightness in my chest that made it feel like I couldn’t catch my breath. If I sat down, I had to stand up, if I was standing, I had to sit. It felt like every nerve was on edge, stretched taut and vibrating.

  Emmett turned to me and smiled a tight, closed-lip smile. I knew it was meant to be reassuring but it just made my stomach churn even more. If he was apprehensive it would only fuel my worry. I thought I might vomit. I felt like I just had to get out.

  I turned suddenly and strode into the kitchen, set my cup on the table with a thunk, and continued out the back door. When I was halfway across the lawn I heard the door slam behind me and the sound of someone running across the grass. I kept moving forward, not even letting myself think. Strong arms wrapped around me from behind and pulled me to a stop.

  “Laney, it’s okay, we’re going to be okay,” Emmett whispered into my ear. “I promise.”

  He held me tight for a few more moments until he was sure I wasn’t going to run away then he turned me around and held me in a bear hug. It was like going home, warm, comforting and safe. All the tension and anxiety went out of me and a few tears came to my eyes. How could this man whom I hardly knew make me feel so safe? So settled? Yet so full of passion? I pushed the tears back, not wanting him to see me cry. Being vulnerable didn’t come easy to me, and I didn’t want to push him away by making him think I was too attached to him so quickly. I didn’t want to seem needy.

  “I’m okay, you can let me go now,” I said, although I still felt like I was falling apart inside. He slowly released me and I reluctantly let go of him. I smiled shakily as I looked in his eyes. “Thanks. I don’t know what happened. I think I was trying so hard to be calm and collected through all this and suddenly I just lost it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I know I keep running away.”

  He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me against his side as we walked back towards the house. “It’s your fight or flight response. The important thing is you keep coming back. You don’t have to be strong alone you know. As humans we look to one another for support. If it were me do you think you would run off and not help? It’s not a matter of a man supporting you, Laney. It’s a friend. Man or woman, it doesn’t matter. Let me in, let me help you.” He gave me a little squeeze as we walked up to the back door.

  I stopped at the door, not sure if I would be able to walk through it. Glancing at Emmett, our eyes met. It would be really sappy to say it out loud, but I knew in that moment that he was the one. His strength gave me strength. With his support, I could be brave. With him, I could hope. If it seemed too soon, so be it.

  As we crossed the threshold I felt the same sense of despair and dread I felt before when I was attacked. Only now it was stronger and seemed to come from everywhere in the house. It was as if something was preparing for a struggle. I looked at Emmett nervously. He nodded, “I’m right here with you.”

  Everyone was still in the living room when I walked in with Emmett behind me. I wondered if anyone else could sense the emanations of fear that I was feeling, but they seemed oblivious to it. They were polite enough not to mention me running out of the house and the crew just acted as if nothing unusual had happened. I found a seat on the sofa next to my mother who put an arm around me. I leaned
my head on her shoulder and felt less anxious. Why was it my mother could always make me feel like everything was going to be all right just by being present? In times of trouble my mom could always be counted on to give consolation without judgment.

  Emmett’s folding chair creaked as he sat and I wondered if it would hold. The chairs looked to be a hundred years old. They reminded me of some similar ones my old church had when I was a child. Perhaps these actually were those chairs, my grandfather would no doubt have gone to a sale at the church if they’d had one.

  “So we are all going to stay together tonight. I think there’s safety in numbers,” Emmett began, shifting again as the chair moaned.

  “Where should we start?” my mother asked.

  “How about we take a poll?” Connie said, leaning forward in the recliner. “I think we should start here in the living room since that’s where we saw our grandmother first.”

  “The living room could be a good place to start,” my aunt agreed.

  “I don’t know, Laney did make more substantial contact up in the master bedroom as well,” Glen said, putting his two cents in.

  No one else spoke. You could hear a dog barking outside, a lawn mower running, and birds singing in the evening air.

  “The basement,” I said, sitting up and scooting to the edge of the couch. “I don’t want to go there, but right now I feel it most coming from the basement.”

  “What do you feel?” Glen asked.

  “Ever since I’ve gotten here, I’ve felt, I don’t know, things. It’s like emotions radiating off the walls and floors. I don’t know how to explain it.”

  “I think I understand a little,” Connie said. “I think I’ve felt a fraction of what you do. I’m only guessing but by your reactions you seem to be sensing it a lot more than me.”