Shearwater: Ocean Depths Book One (FULL)

by D. S. Murphy

  “That was incredible,” I said, tossing Ethan his shirt.

  “But like I said, I don’t know what’s actually true. Our family has a few bottles of the magic potion in our cellar, but I’ve never entirely believed it was mermaid blood. I thought those were just stories for children. I figured it might be something else that science just didn’t understand yet. Some kind of special space lava.”

  “Space lava?” I cocked an eyebrow at him.

  He grinned and shrugged his shoulders, “All I’m saying is, I’ve never really believed in the whole ‘mermaid’ thing, until recently.” Alarm bells sounded in my head. He knows.

  “I knew they were real after Bedelia died. That’s something they used to do, a long time ago. You’ve got to understand, they’re natural born killers. The Tuatha Dé, we’re defending humanity,” he said, walking over to his bike. I held my breath as he unzipped his backpack and pulled out the antique dagger. I was right. It was identical to the one that I’d seen my attacker use. Ethan held it up in front of me and I flinched away from the sharp blade.

  “A family heirloom,” he said. “My father gave it to me when I turned thirteen. He told me about our history, and about the merrow.” Ethan ran his finger down the length of the engraved blade. “The blood gets caught in these grooves, then flows into the handle, which is hollow. It can store three ounces of blood.” Ethan said all this with pride, as if he were at show and tell. I tried to keep the look of horror off my face.

  “What are you going to use it for?” I asked, dreading the response.

  “My father also told me that a merrow killed his brother, Colin. He said if I ever met one, I should plunge this into their abdomen, and twist,” Ethan said, clenching the knife, with a bitter look on his face.

  My heart was pounding as I searched Ethan’s dark eyes for suspicion. Did he know that my mother was half merrow, that I was part merrow? My fingers curled around a small stone. I wondered if I’d be fast enough to use it. The pause seemed to stretch forever, but finally Ethan relaxed his grip on the knife and leaned back against the rock behind him.

  “Sebastian is one of them,” he said, with hatred in his eyes. “And I’m going to kill him.”

  24

  I should have feigned surprise, but instead my face lit up with relief that I wasn’t on the receiving end of the dagger. By the time I thought about denying it, or lying, Ethan had seen the truth.

  “You already know,” his eyes widened.

  “He told me a few days ago,” I said.

  “You know he isn’t human—and you’re still into him? You’re dating a monster.” He wrinkled his nose in disgust.

  “I’m not sure if we’re technically dating…” I said.

  Ethan held up his palm and cut me off.

  “Merrow are dangerous, and you’re seriously deluded if you think he cares about you. He’s using his powers over you, to seduce you. That’s what they do. You can’t help being attracted to him, but it isn’t real.”

  His words stung. I was about to start yelling at him, but I caught myself. What was I going to say, that he was wrong? I was attracted to Sebastian, even drawn to him. I couldn’t stop thinking about him when he wasn’t with me. But I didn’t feel coerced. I didn’t get all doe-eyed and silly like most other girls did in his presence.

  But how would I know if Sebastian was using his merrow powers on me? Was my attraction just a trick? However they got there, I did have feelings for Sebastian. Deep feelings, that hit me in ways I’d never felt before. In that moment, I realized it was foolish to be angry at Sebastian because some crazy merrow wanted to rid the world of humans. It wasn’t his fault. I looked down at the gleaming blade in Ethan’s hand. The thought of it being used on Sebastian made me sick to my stomach.

  I would not let that happen. If Ethan liked me, even a little, maybe I could change his mind.

  “You’re right,” I said finally. “There is a merrow in town killing girls, and we have to stop him.” I put my fingers on his arm and made him look at me. “But it’s not Sebastian.”

  Ethan scowled and pulled his arm away.

  “He’s got some kind of spell over you,” he said.

  “Sebastian is helping me find the real killer,” I said. “He’s just as angry about it as you are.”

  Ethan shrugged. “I doubt that’s true, and it doesn’t make him innocent.”

  “You can’t kill him,” I said, a plea in my voice.

  “Even if I don’t,” he said, crossing his arms, “he won’t last another week up here. Merrow blood is extremely valuable to the Tuatha Dé, remember?”

  My blood ran cold as I pictured Sebastian’s broken body on the pile of rocks nearby, his blood collected and then used to tattoo the flesh of the Tuatha Dé. The scene around us no longer seemed as mystical or beautiful as it had when we arrived at Beaghmore. The sun had lowered in the horizon, and now the stones cast long shadows that stretched like menacing fingers across the too-green grass. The longer Sebastian stayed on land, the more danger he was in. Even if Ethan didn’t kill him, someone else would. My chest tightened, making it hard to breathe.

  “You can’t tell anyone,” I said, grabbing Ethan’s arm. “Your people would destroy him.”

  “Without a doubt. And they’d kill each other just to get at him.” Ethan clenched his jaw. He wasn’t going to listen to me. I had to buy time.

  “Give me a month,” I begged, closing the distance between us until I could feel his warm breath on my cheeks. “Sebastian will find the other merrow, and we’ll deliver him to you. You’ll still be the hero. You’ll still bring a body back to your family, filled with more merrow blood than they’ve ever seen. Everybody wins.” What am I saying?

  “And if he doesn’t?” Ethan asked.

  “Then I’ll help you kill him.”

  ***

  Yesterday, I thought there was no hope for the human race against an army of merrow. But after watching Ethan, I wasn’t so sure. How could you pick a winning team if both sides could do things you’d never dreamed of? Unfortunately for me, I was part merrow… which meant, if Ethan knew what I really was, he’d probably want to kill me too. At least I’d bought Sebastian some time. We just had to find the real killer, and quickly.

  I missed the bus, so Ethan dropped me off at home. There was a white van parked out front that I didn’t recognize. I let myself in, and saw Aedan sitting on the couch with a woman leaning over him. At first I thought I was interrupting something illicit, but then I saw the long white cast propped up on a chair.

  “What happened?” I asked.

  “Just bad luck,” he said. “Was up on a ladder painting the rims and somehow the ladder slipped away from me. I fell, snapped my leg.”

  My mood, which was already low, sank through the floor. I felt crushed under the weight of Aedan’s emotions. He was angry at himself for falling and scared about not being able to work until his leg healed. He’d always looked so upbeat and positive, but I realized now he must have been making an effort. For me. He looked so old and fragile now, and behind his false smile there was a weakness and dejection that had been festering for decades—probably since my mother left. I felt bad that I’d never really asked him about work. I’d been too preoccupied with my own problems.

  “This is Helena,” he said, fidgeting a little. “She works at the hospital.”

  Helena was pretty, with blond hair streaked with silver, and busty. The tight white cardigan buttoned at the waist was straining to contain her as she leaned over Aedan.

  “Aye, had a right old spill,” she said, wiping his chin with a napkin. She’d been feeding him a bowl of soup and was still holding the spoon. “Shouldn’t be working at all, at his age.”

  “Houses ain’t going to paint themselves,” said Aedan. He was worrying about paying the bills, I realized. I didn’t know money was a problem; I’d assumed he could access the money my parents left me. Was he paying for everything out of his own pocket? My new clothes, the phone bill?


  “I need to get back to work,” Helena said, “but you keep him off his feet. He shouldn’t put any weight on it for at least a month.”

  “Not going to happen,” Aedan said with a frown. “I’ve got to finish the Boyle’s house this weekend. If I don’t get it done they’ll find someone else.”

  “Can we help?” I asked.

  “I couldn’t ask you to do that,” he said. “You’ve got school to worry about.” If school was my biggest concern, I’d be in heaven.

  “I’ve painted rooms in our house before, back home. I could get a couple of my friends together and do it. You could teach us how, and supervise the work. It’d be fun.”

  “That sounds like a fine offer,” Helena said. “At your age, you’ll be lucky if this heals right and you don’t have to use a cane for the rest of your life. Seriously. Bed rest. Stay in. Watch old movies.”

  “Maybe if you come watch them with me,” Aedan said, but then looked surprised at his boldness and his cheeks turned red.

  “My Lord, Aedan Daly, are you asking me on a date? You should be ashamed of yourself,” but she smiled and pinched his cheek. “Just kidding, handsome. Give me a ring anytime.”

  It wasn’t until I reached my room and pulled my mom’s phone out of my backpack that I noticed I had several missed calls, and half a dozen text messages from Sebastian.

  Swimming after school?

  I need to see you

  We have more to discuss

  Let me know when you’re ready to talk

  Jackie says you left school with Ethan

  WHERE ARE YOU?!

  I texted back quickly.

  I’m fine

  Come over tonight, 11pm

  I’ll open the window

  I paused, then added,

  Need to see you too

  That night I asked Aedan if he had any family albums, with pictures of my mother as a child, and Phyllis. Now that I knew I was part merrow, I had even more questions about my mother and grandmother. If marrying humans was forbidden, why did Phyllis live on land? Did she fall in love, or was she running away from something? Sebastian said the older merrow were even more hateful of the humans… so why did my grandmother marry one?

  “Met her on the beach one day and asked her to marry me,” Aedan said, pulling a pair of heavy albums from the drawer.

  “How romantic,” I said. I knew there must be more to that story, but how could I ask Aedan without giving away my secret, and potentially putting him in danger? Besides, he looked exhausted. He had difficulty moving around the small room with his cast, so I helped him into his room so he could get some sleep.

  Miscreant sank into the sofa next to me, purring as I flipped through the album and held photos up to the lamp in the living room. He seemed to be warming up to me. I’d seen pictures of my grandmother before; my mom kept a framed portrait of her in the living room, but never talked about her. But I was seeing her in a whole new light now. In her childhood photos, my mother looked happier than I’d ever seen her—an adorable little girl with wide eyes and dirty knees.

  Looking at the pictures of my mother brought my grief rushing back to me. My eyes watered up and I brushed away a tear. I missed her so much sometimes, I could hardly breathe. Phyllis, in contrast, brought up no such emotions. She was so glamorous, looking at photos of her was like flipping through a magazine. She didn’t even seem real. I looked closer and saw that she wore the same necklace in most of the photos; a silver pendant with a blue stone. It looked a little like the Bætulia Ethan had shown me, but much larger and bright blue.

  Sebastian tapped on my bedroom window after dark. I opened it for him and watched him climb inside. There wasn’t much room to stand, and the space between us felt steamy in the small room.

  “Good thing this is a one-story house,” he said, with the hint of a smirk. I wasn’t in the mood for jokes. Part of me felt like I was doing something wrong, sneaking a boy into my room at night. But we had bigger issues. So much had happened since I’d seen him yesterday, I didn’t know where to start. Luckily, he went first.

  “Don’t worry about what I said before, about the merrow. It’s all talk. The grumblings of old men and political posturing. I don’t think they’d ever actually attack the humans.”

  I nodded. A hypothetical merrow invasion seemed less scary now than it had yesterday. There were more pressing concerns to discuss. I’d bought us some time, but Sebastian was still in danger. No matter what his family believed, I didn’t want him to get hurt.

  “My mother was dating a Tuatha Dé,” I blurted.

  Sebastian raised an eyebrow and leaned against my desk.

  “A boy named Colin.” I pulled out the photograph and showed it to him. “Ethan is his nephew. He’s Tuatha Dé, too.”

  Sebastian’s face darkened, and I could tell he was angry at me. “Well, know at least we know who is trying to kill you.”

  “I haven’t told Ethan anything, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know what I am. He didn’t act like he knew about my mother either, at least not the merrow part. And there’s more than one family in the Tuatha Dé. Maybe Colin’s family is different.”

  “Sure, that’s why he carries a dagger around meant for harvesting merrow blood,” Sebastian said grimly.

  “I don’t think he’d hurt me. He keeps trying to protect me, from you. He knows what you are.”

  “Going with him alone was reckless, and stupid.”

  I crossed my arms.

  “Someone had to do something,” I said. “Another girl was murdered yesterday, or didn’t you hear? It has to stop. I couldn’t just sit around and wait for another body.”

  “I don’t know how you came to the conclusion that a rogue merrow was your responsibility,” Sebastian said. He ran his hand through his unruly hair, which only made him more attractive. I wanted him to pin me down on the bed and kiss me brainless, but he’d made it pretty clear in the cave that we couldn’t be together—at least not unless I could change fully—without breaking merrow law and endangering both of our lives. I swallowed back the longing and curled my fingers into my sweaty palms.

  “Ethan’s dad thinks a merrow killed Colin,” I said, changing the subject. “What if it was my mother? You said there weren’t many merrow around anymore. My grandmother was gone, who else could it have been?”

  “Even if it’s true,” Sebastian said, putting his hands on my shoulders, “I’m sure it was self-defense. If Colin found out what she really was, maybe he came after her first. Maybe it was an accident.”

  “Or maybe my mother was a murderer,” I said, feeling sick.

  “It wouldn’t be extraordinary. The Tuatha Dé and the merrow are at war, after all… although I don’t think there have been any casualties for centuries.”

  “But my mom was just a girl—my age. Not a warrior.”

  “But like you, she had powers. She probably didn’t know her own strength. It could have been a reflex, an accident. Nobody was around to show her how to control herself.”

  He gave me a pointed look. Is that what he thought would happen? That I’d accidently kill someone?

  “What about my grandmother, Phyllis?”

  “Maybe the same thing: the Tuatha Dé were always eager to find merrow blood, especially now when it’s so scarce. Maybe they took Phyllis as well.

  “And Father Murphy?”

  “Maybe he got in the way. I don’t think there’s much love between the Church and the Tuatha Dé,” he said, raising one eyebrow. “Anyway, Ethan may not know what you are yet, but you said Ethan’s knife was like the one that attacked you on the pier. So it’s safe to say that someone in the Tuatha Dé already knows about you, and is probably planning their next move. Ethan will figure it out soon, too. The more time you spend with him, the sooner he’ll discover what you really are.”

  He trailed his hands down my arms and held my wrists, his fingers stroking my skin lightly. I felt an explosion of confusing emotions at his touch. Did he know what he was
doing to me?

  “I made a deal with Ethan,” I admitted finally. “I told him we’d find the merrow killing the girls and deliver him to the Tuatha Dé. It was the only way to keep you safe.”

  “It doesn’t work like that,” Sebastian scowled, dropping my wrists. His eyes were suddenly stormy. “They’ll never have enough. If they get one, they’ll want ten more. Even if we deliver, they won’t honor the deal: they’ll kill me anyway, and then you.”

  “I know,” I said quietly. “That’s why you have to leave. It’s not safe here, for you.”

  “Or for you,” Sebastian said.

  “Yeah, but I’m stuck here. I don’t have a choice. You can transform, you can leave.”

  “You want me to run away and hide?” he said.

  “I just want you to be safe, and I hate feeling so helpless. You can’t always be there to protect me. I don’t want you fighting the Tuatha Dé for me, or even other merrow.”

  He pulled me towards him and kissed my forehead.

  “That’s my choice to make, not yours.” My forehead was warm where his lips had pressed against it. I melted into his embrace, as he pulled me gently down onto the bed. I lay back and put my head against Sebastian’s shoulder. He stroked my hair with his long fingers, and a relaxing current of energy flowed through my body. I tried to list all the things I needed to do, but I had trouble catching my fleeting thoughts. It was like a thick fog was settling over my brain.

  As I fell asleep I thought about what I’d done to Roisin. Even though it was an accident, it showed I had some kind of power. Maybe I wasn’t helpless after all. I just needed to learn to control it. Tomorrow I’d ask Sebastian to take me swimming again. It was time to stop being a victim and discover what I was really capable of.

  25

  Sebastian’s brow furled as he concentrated on the still water of our private cave-pool. With his hands open, palm up, he focused on a little bit of salt water, turning it into animal shapes for me. An elephant, a giraffe, a dinosaur. They looked like little crystal figurines, sitting on top of the water.