by Lucy Gage
“Speaking of, perhaps we should talk about that, first.”
“You're in therapist mode. You switched to therapist mode already.”
“We'll get back to the hot sex in a minute.”
“Charlie told you about that, too?”
“Em, she and I have both had an obsessive desire to have sex with your current boyfriend for most of the past ten years, of course she told me. Now, Josh.”
Em sighed. “Fine. We had a fight. I went to the office to cool off without getting drunk and Marcus asked me to take Andrew's place for the Fluxus stuff. You know I wanted the job before, so of course I said yes. Little did I know at the time he was testing me to see how I did under pressure and last minute, despite already planning to give me the promotion to features. But that's another story. When I got back, I decided that I wanted a break from Josh. As in, we're breaking up, we might get back together, we might not. On the way out here, I realized that it was stupid to stay together. I was miserable and I didn't want to marry him, so what was the point? I planned to tell him for sure after I got home.”
“Okay, so, let's get back to Deac, since I assume we're at that point in the story. Or wait, Charlie said you call him Rob?”
“Yes, Meg. His name is Rob. Or Robert. It's Robert Deacon.”
“Well, I know that. I just didn't know that people called him by his real name.”
“His friends and family do.”
“Yes, and from what Charlie said, you're definitely friends. With benefits.”
“Meggie, you don't talk to your clients like that, do you?”
“Oh, honey, you know I don't. Now, tell me what happened there.”
Emily explained how she met Rob. She told her best friend about seeing him later at the bar, how he asked her to dinner and then to the club. About being chased by the photographer, which prompted him to tell her who he was. How she didn't even believe it when he told her.
“You seriously had no idea who he was? You weren't just toying with him?”
“Meg, I'm in Minnesota. Maybe you knew he was from Minnesota and knew his real name, but I didn't. I had no idea I'd meet anyone famous before the gala. Why would I think that? I just thought he was this funny, sweet guy who had the most gorgeous eyes and lips I had ever seen. I wanted him to kiss me all night long. And then he did, and oh, my God, I thought I was going to die. He barely kissed me and I was ready to take off all my clothes for him.”
“Okay, you're making me fan myself.”
“Yeah, well, imagine what it was like to be me, then.”
“Oh, honey, I'm trying, really. I don't know if you want me to think about your boyfriend that way.”
“Ha! It gets better. Before I tell you that, let me get to the rest of that first night.” She told Meg about leaving the club, the car chase, riding around making out in the limo. “When we went up to his hotel suite, he asked me to spend the night.”
“Hubba hubba.”
“No, he told me that it wasn't a big deal if I didn't want to sleep with him. That he wouldn't say no if I did, but he didn't expect it. He just wanted me to spend time with him and to stay so we could have breakfast together. His suite had extra bedrooms and he loaned me clothes to wear to bed. In my own room. Of course, when he kissed me goodnight, it was so hot I almost asked him to sleep with me right then and I know he would have said yes. He said as much. But I didn't. He went to his bed and I went to mine.”
“Damn. That's too bad.”
“You're telling me. Especially when half the reason I didn't is because I wanted to call Josh first and tell him it was really over. That we weren't getting back together when I came home.”
“That's a good thing. Why'd you say it's bad?”
“Because I got a call first thing – from Annie, then Josh, then my mother – giving me crap because a YouTube video showed me kissing Rob, and they all assumed that I'd slept with him, even though I hadn't.”
“Bummer. I mean, that you got accused and didn't get to do the deed.”
“Yeah, well, when it came down to it, I decided there really was no reason to wait anymore, since Josh told me it was over before I could tell him. So I told Rob I wanted to sleep with him.”
“Em! That's so not like you!”
“Well, I didn't say it like that, but I made it pretty clear. Once I saw the goods, let me tell you, I wanted him like I've never wanted anyone in my life. He is just...there are not words.”
“Oh, there are words. But they're not for polite company, I'm sure.”
Emily laughed. “Too true.”
“So? How was he?”
“He is a god in bed. Seriously. It just gets better and better, all the time. He made me come twice the first time. He's done it many times since then. We've done it all over the house, all over the hotel suite, in the shower, against the wall, in more positions than I even knew existed. The other night, for a late Christmas present, I did the Pretty Woman thing.”
“Which one?”
“When he comes home and she's only wearing a tie she bought him. Except, I was also wearing five-inch Louboutins.”
“Holy shit, Em! Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?”
“I'm the chick who used to drool over Trevor Winchester at school and fantasize about Viggo Mortensen in the movie theater.”
“No way! I thought that chick died when Gail the Wicked Witch of the East dropped a house on her!”
“Apparently, she was just mortally wounded and has been recuperating all this time, waiting to make her debut. Who knew it would take getting knocked down by a hot guy to wake her up from her coma?”
“You dealing with it okay? I mean, it's a lot, Em. I've known you almost your whole life. You were a very different girl at sixteen and I'm happy for you if you're rediscovering her. I loved that chick. She was my partner in crime. But are you sure you're handling it okay?”
“No. I'm not. I can't believe you were in Thailand for the last two weeks! I had no one to talk to about this! Well, I talked to Charlie, but it wasn't the same. She doesn't really know all my neuroses. Or that some of them didn't used to exist.”
“Oh, hon, she knows more than you think. Are you in love with him?”
“Why do you ask that?”
“Because it would explain a lot. You are, aren't you?”
“Yes.”
“Love at first sight?”
“No, but first kiss, I think. It's not just physical.”
“I know it's not. You're not that kind of girl. I am, but you're not. He must have really knocked your socks off to kick loose the girl who believes you can fall in love without signing a mortgage first. I really thought she was lost forever.”
“Do you remember when it was that she started to disappear? Because it's fuzzy for me.”
“Oh, I don't know. Maybe around the time that Billy St. Pierre broke your heart.”
“UGH. He was such an idiot. What did I see in him?”
“Don't know, but you were pretty torn up for a couple weeks. Your mom turned into the psycho witch after that.”
“Anja said she thinks that my mom probably had a heartbreak at some point. That's why she doesn't believe in fairy tale love.”
“Anja? Who's Anja? Your new guru? I thought I was your guru?”
“You are my guru. Anja is Rob's mom.”
“Ah, met the fam, did you?”
“I spent Christmas with them. And then New Year's Eve we all went to the gala together. Anja and Pat came to our house for dinner last night.”
“Did you just say 'our house'?”
“I don't know. Did I?”
“You did! Are you living with him?”
“Sort of, I guess. I'm staying at his house this week instead of the hotel. And I'm staying with him at his house when I go to California next week.”
“Seriously? Wow. That's...wow. Em, that's way outside your usual MO. You dated Josh for two years before you lived with him. Hell, you wouldn't let him keep a drawer at y
our apartment before that.”
“I wasn't in love with Josh.”
“But you thought you were!”
“And there is a difference. Apparently, my heart knew even if my brain had no idea. My heart was never in it with Josh. You know that. Charlie told me you both wouldn't have let me marry him.”
“No way. We were both ready to throw down the gauntlet if you tried.”
“Then why did you let me stay with him for so long?”
“Because if we told you to leave him, you'd have wanted him more. Psych 101, baby.”
“Do you think that I want Rob more because my mother is against it?”
“Is that what you think?”
“No. I don't. I really don't. I wanted him before I knew she had an objection. I wanted him more than I've ever wanted anyone. It's so much more than physical. I didn't even notice him at that toy store, Meg. I was so focused on my own thing that I didn't even really see him. I don't have to tell you how bizarre that is. You know how hot he is on camera. He's a million times more beautiful than that in person. And he's so sweet and so kind and so, so generous. He's the biggest geek. It's adorable. And he's so loving. He loves with his whole self.”
“Did he tell you he loves you?”
“On Christmas Eve.”
“What, was it like, during climax?”
“No! He just...he told me he loved all these things about me and that he wanted all of me, he wanted everything. And then he said he loved me. He's told me lots of times since then.”
“Did you say it back?”
“Sort of. He knows I feel that way about him, but I haven't said the words. At least, not to his face when he was awake.”
“You told him when he was asleep?”
“Is that bad?”
“It says you're scared of your feelings, Em.”
“Terrified.”
“Have you thought about stepping back?”
“I don't even know how I can. My brain won't register that idea. I was so bummed, thinking that this was it, this week might be the end. And then when Marcus said I had to travel, that he was sending me to L.A., I was over the moon. I called Rob straight away. I didn't even think about anyone else. I got the promotion and he was the first one I wanted to tell.”
“You really love him.”
“So much, it's scary. But it's him I love, Meg. Not his career. I mean, he's great at it and I'd never not support him. But it's really overwhelming sometimes. The security, the glitz, the reduced privacy, the constant intrusions. And this isn't even L.A. I know it's going to be worse when we get there. Right now, Liam is like a sidekick. He's going to be doing his job and then some next week.”
“Liam? Is he your bodyguard?”
“Yeah. Is that not bizarre? But, seriously, if you didn't know that you could get the details no one else knows about us, would you click on photos and articles at gossip sites to find out? Be honest.”
“Hell, yeah. You know I would. I'm just glad I get to know without having to go that route. But I guess what you're saying is that it makes life really unpleasant when you've got every Tom, Dick and Harry out there trying to dig up dirt and take compromising photos.”
“Add to that events where they're allowed to take photos and ask questions. All the time. If I could just sit here in Minnesota and go to work every day and come home to him at night, I wouldn't be freaking out. That part feels right. Even if it seems like we're rushing things, it doesn't feel that way. I love him, he loves me, neither of us are green in relationships or way too young to think about the future. Why take it slow if it doesn't feel like we need to do that? But when I think about us out...there, it scares the hell out of me. Like, will it still feel real? Will it actually hold up? And what the hell am I going to do if it doesn't? Never mind crap like being on live television or walking a red carpet.”
“Oh, hon, you'll be fine. I told you, it's really him they care about. He's been doing it for a long time, now. Take your cues from him. And if it's meant to be, it will work out.”
“Charlie said that, too.”
“Well, I'm the smart one, but she has her moments.”
Em laughed. “I missed you, Meggie. No more going to retreats and staying out of communication for two weeks. I need you when I'm in crisis.”
“I think you did just fine. Besides, I only stayed two weeks because there was this really hot guy there I was hoping would seek his enlightenment with me, but he was more into this guy. Oh well, I lost a few pounds this Christmas instead of gaining, so I won't complain. Plus, I met this sexy guy, Justin, on the flight from New York to Portland. We're going out tomorrow night.”
“I used to be jealous of your adventures, but I think I like sticking with one guy.”
“I'm just glad you finally found a guy who can turn you on. Sex should not be boring, Em. It should be balls to the wall out of the gate.”
Emily laughed. “I told Rob you would say that. The boring part, I mean. I also told him you'd be jealous.”
“Hell yeah. You get to have sex, regularly, with a guy I've wanted to see naked for nearly a decade. And he's good at it. Even if you never spoke to him again after this moment, I'd still be jealous. Who cares that he's famous? I'd do him because he's hot.”
“Hot doesn't begin to cover it. And neither does a regular condom.” Emily waited for her best friend to get her meaning.
“Holy hell, you're telling me that he's not only good at it, he's packing?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“Did you tell Charlie this?”
“Well, I had to. I said that he had ruined me for other men...”
“Of course he has.”
“...and she thought I meant that he had hurt me. I had to explain what I meant.”
Meg laughed. “Oh, that Charlie Brown. Well, girly, I've got to get going, but I want you to promise you will tell me stories. Lots and lots of stories.”
“Don't I always?”
“Whether you want to or not.”
“Love you, Meggie. Talk to you soon.”
“Later, Emma Bean. Love you. Congrats on the promotion.”
The Fluxus retrospective opening wasn't nearly as stressful as the gala had been. Em's role was more subdued and she didn't need to be host the way she did at the gala. As a result, she enjoyed more of the event and socialized with the Deacons.
Now that she and Rob were officially 'out' as a couple, Em didn't downplay her affection with him in public, though she remembered that she was working. Nonetheless, they often held hands and worked the room together.
It was the kind of thing she had always hoped would happen with Josh, to attend a gallery opening and for them to both enjoy it. After how natural it felt to be doing that with Rob, Em realized that Josh would never have gotten there. It just wasn't his thing. She would always have spent this kind of event literally holding his hand through it and feeling weighed down. When she held Rob's hand, it was a sign of affection, not a clue that one or both of them needed the other to make them feel comfortable.
It was further proof that Rob and Em were a better match than she and Josh had ever been.
Malibu, California, one week after New Year's...
By the time the Fluxus stuff had ended, Emily was beat. After an exhausting three weeks, she was ready for some R&R. Fortunately, Em only had a few interviews to do during the week between the opening and the Globes. She hoped to have plenty of free time to spend with Rob in L.A.
Christopher had dressed her more than once and already knew what she'd be wearing to the Globes. By now, she trusted his instincts. Which meant that she only had one fitting time before the event. They made an appointment for later that week and worked around her two interviews. Em thought that Rob lived right in L.A., but he lived in Malibu. Christopher's studio was in downtown and since two of her three interviews were nearby, she set up everything so she could avoid too many trips into L.A. while she was on 'vacation'.
She had forgotten about her SUV until the l
ast minute, and Rob had Amy switch the bill to his account, letting them drop off the truck without much fanfare. Because they arrived at the airport without the limo, they managed to thwart the paparazzi's efforts to find them before they got through security. Rob took her to an elite lounge for the airline, and when it was time to board, because they were in first class, they got on quickly and painlessly.
The flight was uneventful. The weather cooperated, so the flight itself was smooth. A few people had recognized Rob on the plane, but they were polite so it wasn't a big deal.
Landing in L.A. was another story. Rob spent some of the flight preparing her for what it would be like getting off the plane. There were always photographers at LAX – too many famous people flying in and out, so there would be someone to see.
When they arrived, there was no way to describe it that would do it justice. It was like meeting Christopher for the first time – when you've encountered a force of nature, you have to roll with it or get trampled. This was like Christopher times ten, on steroids, and with telephoto lenses.
A throng of photographers, constant flash bulbs, shouts of both Rob's name and her own. Rick and Liam paved the way on either side of them, withRick's huge frame marking the path and Liam protecting them in the rear. Rob had said to keep walking, ignore the paps and follow Rick. If they didn't have carry-on luggage, they could have run.
They arrived at the limo that was waiting by the curb and Em jumped into the car first. Liam stowed the bags with the driver, and Rick kept the horde at bay while Rob signed autographs. Once the men were in the limo, Rick tapped the divider and they sped off. Em was never so glad to be sitting in the limo in her life.
She must have looked shell-shocked, because Rob pulled her into his arms, kissed her hair and rubbed her back. Rick said, “The airport is one of the worst places, Em. They're crawling all over the place here, but the ones clustered at the airport are fighting for the best pictures. It's not nearly as bad as that most of the time.”
“Good. Because that was terrifying.”
Rob pulled back to look at her. “Are you okay?”
Em nodded. “I don't know if I'll ever get used to that.”
