Guide My Heart

by Caroline Swart

  “She’s tanning at the pool today. Said something about being a good friend.”

  “Oh.”

  Double damn.

  “I’ve packed brunch in case you’re hungry.” His mouth curled up invitingly. “We can eat along the way.”

  I chewed on my lip. Chris was only offering to take me for a game drive. Nothing more. I was probably making this Milla situation bigger than it should be. Raising my chin, I made a decision.

  “Sounds good. I’ll get my bag and we can leave.”

  As we walked to the door, I tried to calm the beating of my heart. This was Thor, the man of my dreams. Meghan would tease me without mercy, but I wanted a bit of fun on my vacation too. It was a shame I wanted more than a fling. Things would be so simple if that was all I was after.

  Watching him as he took my key to lock the room door, my blood sizzled. He was the best vacation fantasy I’d ever had. If only he were a one-girl guy, I’d claim him as my own.

  Inhaling deeply, I followed him behind the cottages where he helped me into a brand-new white Jeep. We headed out on a dirt road that curved behind the lodge, and although it was narrower than the main road, it was just as bumpy. We stopped at an electrified double-fenced gate before entering the reserve.

  The Jeep was far more comfortable than the game-drive vehicle. It had plush leather seats and a hard-plastic dashboard. The sunroof had been removed, allowing a square of sunlight to bake my head and arms.

  Neither of us spoke as the road slanted uphill. Chris sneaked a few glances my way, but I kept my gaze fixed on the horizon. After a while, he slowed down and left the gravel road behind. Turning the wheel, he followed a smaller track through the bush until it ended under the tangled branches of a tree.

  “So,” he said proudly as he shut off the ignition. “What do you think?”

  For a second, I was speechless. The view before us was breathtaking. He’d parked on the lip of a hill that dipped in front of us with endless miles of yellowed grass plains extending in gentle rolls and swells into the distance.

  “Oh my,” I breathed in awe. To the right, herds of buck clumped together like tiny dots on a canvas, grazing peacefully in the morning sun. The breeze was warm, and I could smell a hint of dried earth in the air. “This place is stunning. Do you come here often?”

  Chris shifted toward me, making himself comfortable against the door. “Yes, but not as often as I’d like. My brother used to join me, but he’s studying at college for the next few years.”

  My brows hiked. “I didn’t know you had a brother.”

  “Nico is in Johannesburg studying tourism. Following in my footsteps,” Chris said with a warm smile, “or so he says. My dad inherited this place. We’ve been farming here for generations. Changing to a game reserve wasn’t a hard decision, though. We love animals, and it’s too dry to grow crops anymore.”

  Opening the console between us, he reached for a soda and offered it to me.

  “Thanks.” I smiled.

  “My younger sister, Karien, lives in Australia.”

  “Lucky girl. I’ve always wanted to go there. South Africa was at the top of my list, but Australia is a close second.”

  “Why was South Africa your first choice?” He watched me carefully as I took a sip of the lukewarm drink.

  Glancing at my birthmark, I swallowed again before continuing. “My mother was born here. Somewhere nearby, apparently. My grandmother said Mom was adopted, but she passed away before my mom could get the details. There’s no paperwork, and there’s no record of a clinic anymore.”

  Chris straightened in his seat. “Does your mother have the same mark on her arm as yours?”

  “You thought it was a tattoo,” I said, wondering why he was so curious about my birthmark.

  “I couldn’t be sure without asking.”

  Lifting the hair away from my neck, I nodded. “Yes. It’s a birthmark we share.”

  The temperature was rising, and I was grateful for my decision to wear shorts. That wasn’t the only reason, though. Chris couldn’t stop staring, and his gaze raked over my body from head to toe.

  I tried not to squirm under the intense scrutiny. “All the girls in my family have the same pigmentation on our arms. My twin sisters are younger than me, and they have the same marks.”

  Snapping his gaze to mine, he widened his eyes. “You have sisters?”

  “Yep. Madonna and Cher.”

  He couldn’t hide the smile that followed, then laughed out loud. “Was your mother hoping to start a band?”

  “If she did, she was disappointed.” I grinned, looking away at the savanna. “Madonna is the rowdy one. She’s the mouthy twin, and Cher is her exact opposite. So timid, she wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

  “And what does your mother do?” He raised his arms above his head in a stretch.

  “My mom?” Trying not to stare at the golden strip of skin he’d exposed between his shirt and shorts, I played with the ring on the soda can.

  “Yes. Tell me about her.”

  “Mom loves animals, she’s a vet in New York. We call her the cat lady. She’s like a cat whisperer—they all love her. My dad passed away when we were young, but Mom didn’t remarry. After this trip, I’m going to study to be a vet like her. My sisters too. We’re all animal lovers, but none of us sing, except in the shower.”

  His serious green gaze caught mine. “Sorry about your dad.” Shaking his head, he scratched his jaw. “I can’t believe you have more siblings, though.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “And you all like cats?”

  “Yes, the whole cat family. That’s why I was so excited to see the lions on our game drive.”

  “I’ll organize a trip so you can meet them personally. They’ll be happy to know you’re an animal lover.”

  “Are you going to tell them about me?” I gave him a look of disbelief.

  “Absolutely.”

  The panty-melting grin was back, and I tried not to fan myself.

  “See the vultures over there?” Changing the subject, he pointed to the left, resting his arm on my shoulder as he motioned toward the sky.

  With a quick nod, I looked up, trying hard to ignore the feel of his skin against mine. My heart pitter-pattered at his touch, and I struggled to keep a straight face.

  Up above, three birds wheeled endlessly like planes in a flight pattern over the dry landscape, their wide wingspans throwing shadows on the ground.

  “The lions are feasting on a kill, and the vultures are waiting for their turn.” His voice deepened, and he moved close enough for his breath to tickle the fine hairs on my neck.

  Aware of the heavy weight of his arm, I tried to concentrate on the scene ahead. I could see all the animals. Two male lions attacked a carcass while a few lionesses stalked around the kill, glancing back at the hyenas who circled them at a respectable distance. The hyenas poked their heads forward, darting away when the lions growled.

  Chris let his fingers rest on my bicep, and instantly, the mood in the vehicle changed. My knees trembled and my pulse pounded in my ears.

  “If you look carefully,” he said, moving his hand lower, “you’ll see the rest of the pride, waiting behind the males.”

  Using his other hand, he pressed a thumb under my jaw, tilting my face to his. He gave me a second to pull back, but I didn’t. I couldn’t stop what was about to happen, even if I tried.

  “It’s a beautiful thing to see,” he said reverently as his gaze focused on me. Inching forward, his lips hovered over mine. “So, so beautiful.”

  And then his mouth swept down. His tongue ran against the seam of my lips before delving inside. As he kissed me, his fingers left my chin, finding my wrist and the paw-print birthmark.

  Sparks zinged through my body. Bright flashes of light pinged behind my eyelids, and a golden chain materialized around us, looping under my arms until it wrapped snugly around my waist. The loose end of the chain snaked around his hand, dropping into his open palm
. Chris closed his hand over the chain and groaned. He gave the slightest of tugs, pulling me closer.

  With a ragged exhale, I shifted. This was insane. His drugging kisses made me cling to him in desperation. Closing my hands around his neck, I whimpered as heat flowed like honey through my veins.

  “Britney,” he moaned against my lips. “You’re killing me.”

  I was halfway over the armrest when the harsh toot of a car horn interrupted us.

  Reluctantly, Chris pulled away. I wanted to cry when the chain vanished and his warmth left my skin.

  Oh God.

  It had happened again, but this time, I couldn’t blame alcohol. I’d only had a sip of soda all morning.

  Chris’s chest rose and fell as he glared over the headrest. Slamming back into the seat, I straightened my top, combing my hair with my fingers. Whoever had interrupted us had the worst timing ever.

  A black Land Rover stopped about ten feet away, and the horn tooted twice more before the engine switched off. The windows were open, revealing Renaldo smirking as he raised a hand in greeting.

  “Britney. Chris. What a coincidence. Good to see you both.”

  The knuckles on Chris’s hand whitened around the steering wheel. Some of the hair in his ponytail had escaped after our embrace, and one end of his shirt collar stood up.

  Renaldo eyed us knowingly, focusing on my swollen lips. His mouth tightened in disappointment, as if he knew what we’d been doing. Trying to hide my burning cheeks, I twirled my hair nervously.

  Just then, Milla leaned forward in the passenger seat of Renaldo’s car. A hard expression crossed her face as she glared at me, but it was gone in a flash. The next minute, her face morphed into a smile as she batted her eyelashes at Chris.

  “There you are. I have been looking for you. I wanted to show you the new tattoo I got.” Without any warning, she pulled up the edge of her stretch top to display a row of colorful lines peeking out under her exposed bra cup.

  I was so going to throw up.

  She sat back slowly, giving me a satisfied grin, and I battled to keep my mouth shut. My fists clenched as I thought about her and Chris together. Yes, there was no doubt left in my mind. They’d been together. She wouldn’t be so forward if they hadn’t been intimate before.

  Chris cursed under his breath, but if he was mad, it was only because he’d been caught.

  The air in my lungs burned, and I wanted to cry. Why was I so upset? This was supposed to be a vacation fling. I knew the score before I got in the car, but just thinking about Chris with Milla gutted me, making my heart ache.

  There was no way to explain why I felt this way—like Chris was my whole life. My everything. Emotions charged through me like quicksilver, running rampant through my brain. I was so jealous, I could scream. And I didn’t get jealous. Ever.

  “What’s wrong, Brit?” Chris frowned at me as he placed a hand on my arm. “Why are you so upset?”

  To be honest, I couldn’t answer him. There was no explanation for my anger. All my emotions were heightened when I was near him. The intoxicating smell of vanilla rose around me, and my blood began to boil. My head ached with a dull pounding that surged with each beat of my heart.

  I couldn’t think clearly. Sitting close to him muddled my brain, and the pain in my head intensified. There was no other option. I had to get away from him. Ripping my arm from his grasp, I unlatched the door and jumped out before he could stop me.

  “Britney, what are you doing?” Chris shouted after me. “Britney, no. Don’t get out!”

  Renaldo’s eyes widened. “Brit, listen to Chris.”

  Opening his door, Renaldo was about to climb out of the seat when a low growl rumbled from behind. My legs froze, and I turned to look back slowly.

  “Oh my God.”

  I stiffened at the sight of a huge lioness crouched a few feet away with flattened ears, her amber eyes fixed on Renaldo. He jumped back into his car and slammed the door while Milla shrieked hysterically beside him.

  I stood alone outside the Jeep. The lioness switched her gaze to me, and I knew I had to get back into the vehicle, but my limbs wouldn’t work. I was frozen to the spot.

  “Stay calm,” Chris whispered fiercely as he moved across the seat and opened the door. Landing on the ground in front of me, he held up a hand, grunting at the lioness.

  “Simba. Hamba.”

  He maintained eye contact with the predator while reaching behind to grab my arm. Carefully shielding me, he maneuvered us back to the Jeep.

  As soon as my body touched the cold metal, my brain kicked into action. With legs and arms scrambling in haste, I slid across the passenger seat to the driver’s side.

  Chris remained steady, gradually climbing into the car. He closed the door with a gentle click, still keeping his eye on the lioness.

  The creature stared at us for a few seconds longer before rising out of her crouch to lope away into the bushes.

  “Jeez.” Chris breathed unsteadily. “That was close.”

  With trembling fingers, I grabbed hold of the steering wheel.

  Renaldo reversed his car and drove up to the passenger door, too close for a lion to sneak between the vehicles. He spoke through a small gap in the window.

  “Are you crazy, Britney?” With an incredulous stare, he shook his head. “What were you thinking?”

  I couldn’t answer. The reality of what had happened hit me with force, and my mouth opened and shut without forming words.

  Chris placed a hand over mine to calm me. “She forgot where she was for a second,” he told Renaldo. “I’ll take her to the lodge. A glass of sugar water should settle her nerves.”

  “A stiff tot of brandy would be better, if you ask me.”

  “What a stupid girl.”

  Milla’s shrill voice grated through my already fragile nerves. Clenching my jaw, I gave her a dark look.

  “Not now, Milla.” Chris frowned at her before turning his gaze on Renaldo. “Why don’t you two get back to the lodge? We’ll meet up with you shortly.”

  Renaldo rubbed the back of his neck and stared at me before starting the car. I could see he wasn’t pleased to leave me behind, but there wasn’t much he could do. The Land Rover reversed and then roared away in a cloud of dust.

  “Are you okay?” Chris ran a knuckle down my cheek. His expression had softened to one of concern, making my bottom lip tremble.

  “Something is happening to me, Chris. What is it?”

  “Oh, Britney.” He exhaled. “There’s so much you need to know.”

  “Please, Chris.” My eyes filled with tears. “This isn’t like me at all. When I’m with you, I change. I’d never do anything so foolish on my own.” Swallowing hard, I whispered, “What are you doing to me?”

  For a second, I thought he’d explain, but he didn’t. All he mumbled was, “It’s called the Stirring,” before he climbed over the seat to sit in the back.

  “The what?” Resting my head against the leather headrest, I kept my eyes focused on his.

  “Go on. Get into the passenger seat.” He gestured with a finger. “The roof is open, and I don’t want Simba to get ideas.”

  That spurred me into action. Before he could blink, I was on the other side.

  He chuckled softly as he settled behind the wheel. Once the engine started, he threw the vehicle in reverse and took us away from the edge of the hill.

  I wanted to continue the conversation, but he twined his fingers through mine and lifted my hand, kissing my birthmark gently. Without warning, my eyelids fluttered closed, and the next time they opened, I found myself safe between the cool sheets of my bed.

  All alone.

  Chapter Seven

  “Do you see him?”

  “Nope,” Meghan said, popping the p while she surveyed the lobby. “And he wasn’t in the restaurant or anywhere outside.”

  It was Christmas Eve, and I still hadn’t spoken to Chris about the incident the day before. Meghan and I had been on a missi
on to find him since breakfast this morning, and she was taking her role as my private investigator seriously.

  A door near the reception desk opened, and I heard his voice clearly. Meghan squeaked before shoving me behind the life-sized elephant carving. “Get back.”

  Hooking a strand of Christmas lights around the elephant’s ear, she edged forward. I peeked over her shoulder just as Sarie stormed into the lobby. Chris followed her, his voice sharp and accusing in his own language. Sarie fired a string of Afrikaans words at him.