Up for Grabs (Up For Grabs #1)

by Heather Young-Nichols

  I’d been on the receiving end more than once but I still called her a friend.

  Kendra went her way to class and I headed to the cafeteria. I hunkered down in a booth with a breakfast sandwich I’m not sure I actually tasted, a diet pop, and an apple I attacked with the ferocity of a jackal descending on a sickly gazelle. I was hungry. It didn’t help that I had to get caught up on reading Wuthering Heights and needed my blood sugar up to stay awake.

  “What’d that apple ever do to you?” Cain slid in across from me taking me completely by surprise.

  With my mouth completely full, puffy cheeks and everything, I couldn’t speak. Instead I got the pleasure of looking him over again. I never got tired of looking at him. Dear God, he was gorgeous. Brown hair, short with a disheveled look, was sexy and the chocolate brown eyes made me melt just looking at them. Why he sat across from me when I’d just left him in the library with Adam and Matt, I didn’t know? The silence got awkward but I didn’t want to choke in front of him either.

  “So, what’re you reading?” I held up the book for him to see the cover. “Yikes.”

  After chewing faster than a rabid beaver, I could finally speak and stop being dorky. “I hear the second half is better but getting through the beginning is torture.”

  “So.” For whatever reason I couldn’t look away while he spoke. “Sam is having a party tonight. You should come.”

  “Sam is?”

  “Yeah, he’s a pain in the ass and he likes parties. Usually it’s his excuse to get drunk.”

  “Maybe.” I shrugged.

  “Adam’s coming.”

  “Which means Kendra is. That should be a delight. You’re apartment seems to have an … effect on them.”

  “Gross.” He shook his head like he was trying to get an image of the two of them out of his thoughts. “I’ll keep my bedroom door locked.”

  We both laughed as he started to slide back out.

  “I’ll see ya tonight.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I called after him as he walked away with a quick flick of his hand over a shoulder.

  ***

  I didn’t know what to wear. Casual, obviously, but what? Settling on skinny jeans because I’m thin enough to pull them off and a deep purple top Kendra assured me hugged in all the right spots, I decided to keep my hair down, letting the natural wave take over. Parties weren’t my thing anyway and most people only saw my jeans and t-shirt ensemble I wore to class and the long braid when I couldn’t deal with my hair. Which was pretty often. Maybe they wouldn’t noticed me more “done up” for a party.

  “Flannery, you’re walking STD is here,” Ava called from the other side of my bedroom door.

  Rolling my eyes, I double checked to make sure all the electronics were off, I didn’t need any electrical fires, and headed out.

  “The funny thing is…” Adam sat relaxed and taking up most of the couch in the common room as I joined them, “I’m not sure if she’s talking about me or her—ouch.”

  Kendra slapped his arm. “You of course.”

  “What are you guys doing tonight?” Jared came out of Ava’s room tucking in his shirt. Yuck. Those two were like rabbits.

  “Party at Sam Allen’s. You guys going?” Damn Adam for inviting them. I liked Jared and Ava enough but seriously, I needed time away from them.

  “Nah, the football team is getting together.”

  “To thump chests and shave each other’s backs,” Ava quipped.

  “All right, all right.” I tugged Adam from the couch. “Let’s go before it gets all Sharks versus Jets up in here.”

  Adam knew without me saying we’d need to stop on the way. Kendra and I didn’t have a car. Kendra was from New York and never learned to drive. Me because I couldn’t afford it which meant Adam got the pleasure of carting us around. He didn’t seem to mind.

  After hitting the convenience store for an iced tea, something I’d done since high school when going to a group gathering, to have an excuse to refuse alcohol, we arrived at Cain’s apartment. Man, he lived in a huge complex and the parking lot was already packed. Music guided us to the right unit. Adam let us in without knocking because honestly, who would hear or care? The place had filled with wall to wall people before we got there. Adam started talking, yelling really, with someone pretty quickly, leaving Kendra and me with only each other, although we stayed right there with him.

  “Hey, glad you came.” Cain came over with an open beer bottle and three closed ones in his hands. Adam took one with a thanks as did Kendra. When he got to me, I shook the iced tea at him to decline.

  “Flannery doesn’t drink,” Kendra offered. “Like ever.”

  “That doesn’t mean you can’t,” I rolled my eyes at her.

  “That’s fine,” he said.

  “Yes but if you ever figure out why, let me know,” Kendra said after a long swallow of her beer. “This one keeps secrets better than anyone I know.” She’d gone a little crazy when I told her Cain invited me. Like weird girl crazy about how he must want in my pants and stuff. I pretended to listen.

  Cain passed the last beer off to someone else, leaned a little closer and put his hand on my lower back. Huh? For a second, I couldn’t think. The heat of his hand permeated my shirt warming me to my toes. Kendra noticed too because her eyebrow shot up. I’d be getting a not so nice “told you so” in my future.

  “Hey, ah, where’s your bathroom?” She asked.

  “Follow the line.” I pointed to the people standing against a wall because where there’s a line, there’s a bathroom.

  “Oh, there’s one off my bedroom. You guys can use that one. It’s the last room down the hall.” He pointed past the crowd. “Just make sure to close the door behind you so nobody follows you in.”

  Kendra grabbed my arm, dragging me behind her. She didn’t stop until we were secure inside. I didn’t even have to go.

  “What was that?” She didn’t close the door while she peed; she was that comfortable with me. It’s not like I’d be looking, but still.

  I walked around Cain’s room slowly, not touching anything. It was such a guy space, only neater than I would’ve imagined. Not that I’d imagined his room. At all. His huge bed was covered with a dark blue comforter and I wondered why he had such a big bed, and then blushed as I put two and two together. I don’t think I’d ever slept in something as big. At home my twin bed barely fit me and supposedly that’s the same size the school provided, but I had my doubts. The school bed was tiny even for me.

  Tucked away against the far wall sat a desk with a closed laptop and books, papers, etc. Things you’d expect, a dresser near the closet and a TV hanging on the wall. A big one.

  “What are we talking about?” I finally asked as she washed her hands.

  “You know what. His hand, your back.”

  “Uh, just being nice?” Even I knew better.

  “Psshh. He’s hot.” After she entered the room, she pulled open one drawer than another looking through his things. “I mean, not like Adam, but still good.”

  “Knock that off.” I slapped her hands away. “We need to get out there before this gets creepy.” Kendra opened his nightstand drawer. “Ok, we’re there.”

  “Hey, at least he comes prepared.” No idea what she was talking about. “Condoms, Flannery. Nightstand drawer.”

  “Go!”

  When we returned to the living room, the entertainment changed from boys playing video games to karaoke. I stood behind the couch taking it all in. Cain’s friends were funny but seriously couldn’t carry a tune. Kendra disappeared somewhere with Adam, I didn’t want to know. Actually, I may have become invisible because people slammed into me left and right. Like no one noticed me standing there. I’m short but man. Courtesy.

  “Hey.” Cain’s voice made me jump a mile. He stood right up against me with an arm on each side, hands gripping the back of the couch. “Do you sing?”

  “Lord no.” My heartbeat picked up a few notches.

/>   “Need another drink?”

  I turned around putting us face to face and my heartbeat went out of control. Actually, we were my face to his chest, but I looked up at him. The man made my knees week. I’d noticed him as soon as he sat down in class, of course, but didn’t dwell on it too much. He hadn’t shown interest. And there were lots of hot guys on campus. I’d determined to admire him from afar like the others. I needed to stay focused on my studies to make sure I kept my scholarship anyway.

  “I’d love some water.”

  His hand returned to the small of my back to lead me to the kitchen. The couple inside left as soon as we arrived. I hopped up onto the countertop not even thinking about the fact that I wasn’t in my own home and it might not be socially acceptable. Cain got close before handing over a bottle of water, keeping one for him, then hopped onto the counter kitty corner from me causing our knees to touch. I wasn’t sure if he did it on purpose, but kinda hoped he did.

  “So why don’t you drink?”

  Taking a big mouthful of water, my cheeks puffed out and once I swallowed, I gave an over exaggerated sigh. He laughed.

  “I didn’t mean water.”

  “You don’t want to hear about that.”

  “Actually, I do.”

  Another drink to buy time didn’t change the interest on his face. “Well, it’s my mom’s fault.” Why the hell would I tell him that? I never talked about this stuff with anyone. What was he doing to me?

  “She an alcoholic?”

  My head shook in response. “When she was seventeen she went to this party where she enjoyed more than her fair share, you know? Ended up with an … unwanted surprise.” I tipped the bottle back against my lips.

  “Herpes?”

  The water I’d taken in almost ended up all over his face. Instead, I went ahead and choked it down. That was close. He unsuccessfully tried to control his amusement.

  “Me.”

  “Yikes.”

  “Yeah, the gift that keeps on giving.” Cain smiled at my self-deprecating humor. He tried to keep a laugh at bay and succeeded for the most part. It was true. My mom called me the gift she didn’t know she wanted.

  Although I couldn’t guarantee she always felt that way.

  Chapter Three

  Cain sighed as he hopped down, standing close, too close, in front of me. Our eyes locked. Heat flushed my cheeks; I could feel it even if he couldn’t see it. I hoped he couldn’t see it. His hands gripped my hips to pull me off the counter. My body slid down his creating a nice friction. I stood there gazing up as he stared back at me. By the look on his face, I thought he might kiss me. Hoped he’d kiss me. Then the door to the kitchen opened. On instinct I wanted to take a step back but couldn’t. So he did. And he took the smallest step known to man.

  “What’s going on in here?” Kendra teased. I would’ve thrown a knife at her if only I had one handy. She kept going when I didn’t answer. “Hey, Adam and I are outta here. You coming?”

  “Ah. He’s my ride, so … yeah.” The last thing I wanted was to leave the little alcove Cain’s arms created in that moment but they were my ride.

  “I can take you home,” he offered.

  “Yeah, he could take you home,” she smirked. One day, I promised myself, I would pay her back. Not that I minded him taking me, but did she have to be completely obvious?

  “I don’t want to be any trouble. You’ve got people here.”

  Kendra giggled. Not drunk, maybe tipsy.

  “It’s no trouble, Flannery,” he assured me.

  Kendra smirked at me again then she left, taking Adam with her.

  We were back out amongst the mostly drunk in the living room when Cain asked if I wanted to go somewhere else to talk. I did so I nodded, although I would have loved to do more than talk. Not a lot more, because I didn’t know him very well, but there was something about the man that put me at ease. He felt comfortable. Following him around everyone, we went into his bedroom and he shut the door. We could still hear the music but muted.

  “Is there more to the story with your mom?” Cain leaned back against the headboard of his bead casually. Like he was completely used to have a girl in his room. Which I’m sure he was. I wasn’t used to being the girl in some guy’s room.

  I felt like I might puke. In a good way. My stomach flipped and flopped every which way and wouldn’t settle down.

  “Is that why you haven’t told Kendra about it?” He pushed. Like I said, I felt comfortable with him in a way very, very different than with Adam, Kendra, or Ava.

  “My mom doesn’t know who my dad is.” His eyebrow raised a notch, otherwise his face remained unchanged. No judgment, which made me swoon a little. “Yeah, she didn’t remember anything until the pregnancy test came up positive. So, as you can imagine, I had the mother of all cautionary tales in my house.” Sitting on the opposite end of the bed, my back stayed rigid. Not the most comfortable but I’d take it to be able to look at his face. “What about you?”

  “My parents are normal, I guess. No story there.”

  “So …” The butterflies in my stomach wouldn’t let me sit still any longer. It didn’t seem to bother him when I started walking around his room slowly. “I tell you one of my most guarded secrets and you give me nothing? Leads me to believe you’re a taker not a giver.”

  Holy crap! I was flirting. Yes, I did it all the time playfully, but man, with Cain I wanted it to work.

  “Rest assured, I’m a giver.” His voice came out low, husky even. My body tingled; starting in the pit of my stomach then inching up the back of my neck until I shivered. And it wasn’t cold.

  Since I had my back turned toward him, he couldn’t see me blush for the millionth time of the night yet I needed to see the look on his face. I could only manage a quick glance over the shoulder before parts of me that never quivered before did.

  “So you want a tightly held secret?” I hadn’t heard him get off the bed or come over. Yet he almost touched my back to his front. He was tall enough that his chin could rest on the top of my head. When I turned around to answer, words wouldn’t form. I nodded instead. “Over the last three weeks, I’ve thought about kissing you more times than I can count.”

  How exactly does a girl respond to his words?

  “How drunk are you?”

  Cain burst out with a loud laugh. Clearly he hadn’t expected my question and I liked that I took him off guard.

  “Flannery, no. I didn’t even finish the beer I had when you got here in case drinking was something you frowned on.”

  “Why haven’t you then?” His eyebrows furrowed like he’d forgotten what he said. “Kissed me. You said you thought about it?”

  “Ah, because we’ve mostly been in class and the library with Adam and Matt. Not exactly prime opportunities.”

  “See, I don’t know …” I pushed around him with my arms crossed under my breasts trying not to picture how well his blue t-shirt fit him. He had to play a sport. Guys don’t get to walk around looking the way he did without work. “I think if you really wanted to, you would’ve found a way.”

  His hand grabbed my arm, spinning me around until I slammed into his chest. He meant business, which pushed my heart rate right back up. And I’d been getting comfortable. Not able to take my eyes off his, I concentrated on my breathing to ensure I was in fact still breathing.

  Cupping my face, Cain stroked his thumbs over my jaw then lowered his lips to mine. The gentle nothing of a kiss didn’t stay that way. Almost like he couldn’t help himself and I knew I couldn’t, my lips parted. He took the hint, exploring and tasting me. Without thinking, I grasped the sides of his waist, his muscles there nothing short of hard amazement. Best of all, I couldn’t taste any trace of beer in his mouth. It wouldn’t have stopped me, obviously, but I was glad it wasn’t there.

  When it ended, I didn’t open my eyes right away because I could still feel his breath on my face, meaning he stayed close. His breath came out slightly ragged. Finally, someo
ne needed to say something.

  “Do you play a sport?” Really? That’s what I came up with?

  He laughed.

  “That’s all you can think of?”

  “I just … you seem all ripped. I mean … at least where I touched.” Dear God, why was I still talking?

  “Soccer. In the fall. You’ll have to come watch.” I nodded speechless. The fall was months away and my girl brain kicked in. Did he mean it in a random “support your school team” kind of thing or a “I’m so in love with you. I won’t be able to be away from you long enough to play a game without you there”? Even in my thoughts I rambled when I got nervous. The second option was beyond ridiculous. Embarrassing to even let myself think it. And I wanted to kick my own ass.

  Soon after that kiss, we decided I should get home. I didn’t have class the next day but it had gotten pretty late by then and sleep started calling for me. There’s only so much heart racing a girl can take. His car, a black something or other had been parked right up from in the darkness. We were quiet on the way back and he insisted walking me to the door. At the front of his car, he took my hand. I didn’t object.

  “I think it’s obvious I’d like to take you out.”

  “Oh.” I snapped my hand back and sped up to get out in front of him. I noticed his absence more than I should have. “I’m not sure I’m interested.”

  “Right.” Cain double timed it colliding into me and wrapping his arms around my body. “I think you are.”

  I giggled because apparently Cain turned me into a girl that giggles. After my laughter quieted down, we agreed to go out tomorrow night. I hadn’t had a date on Saturday night in quite a while. He kissed my forehead before letting me go. Meant as a sweet gesture, I liked it just the same as much as the kiss we shared in his room.