I let out a breath. “I know, I know. It’s just still hard to keep the memories at bay. I think going to the trial will help, and being able to wake up here without being held at gunpoint will be a good reminder that it’s over.”
“Have you thought about seeing a therapist? PTSD is not something to take lightly, and talking about it can be really cathartic. I talked to one a few times after my mom died. I can get you some names.”
“I think that’s a really great idea.” I paused, leaning into him. “I talked to Mrs. Kirkpatrick today.” Grant ground his teeth but kept silent. This was his least favorite topic. “Christian completed his first full week of rehab today.”
“I still can’t believe you agreed to let that fucker go camping in the mountains for twelve weeks instead of him serving time.”
“Grant, we talked about this. This is what’s best for him. And he’s not camping. He’s at a rehab center in North Carolina. And after he’s released, he’s going to join the Army. The structure they can offer is what he needs. Not jail. He won’t learn anything there.”
He kissed my forehead. “I said I’d support you and I do. That doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
I looked back at my house. “Let’s go in. I have to face it, and right now all I want to do is cuddle in bed with you. Not talk about Christian or bad memories.”
Grant opened the door and came around to my side, scooping me up in his arms. “That I can do.”
He carried me straight into my room, which had been cleaned, and set me gently down in the bed. The sheets had been changed and a new lock had been put on my door.
“My mother?” I asked, indicating the changes around me.
“Yes. She thought it might make you feel a little more comfortable about returning.”
My eyes slid shut as I sunk into the bed. It was familiar and soft—comforting. But as soon as I allowed myself to fully relax, the memories washed over me, and I tensed, my breath hitching.
“Shh, it’s okay,” Grant reassured me, placing a protective arm around me, and I leaned into him. “Open your eyes. No one is here but me.”
I slowly opened them and tried to blink back tears. I watched, silent, as he kissed my shoulder. And then kissed it again.
“No one is going to hurt you.” He ran his hand down my leg, inducing shivers. He traced indiscriminate patterns along my thigh and behind my knee until all of the tension left my body. “This is a place for love, not fear.”
He moved to stroke my arm, his fingers running up and down, over and over. Each pass was like striking flint, and I sighed. “How do you feel now?”
“Better. Much better.”
Grant sat up in the bed, cupping his hands to frame my face between them. “I think it would help if you had some new memories in this room. What do you think?”
I hummed in pleasure. “Well, I like the sound of that.”
Grant moved to the foot of the bed, wrapped his hands around my non-broken leg, and pulled, sliding me down the bed until I lay completely flat. “I think, before we can make new memories, we need to get rid of any pain.” He kissed a bruise on my ankle. “I think I can kiss all that pain and make it go away.” He switched to the other leg, peppering kisses on my knee right above my cast. “Every.” Kiss. “Single.” Kiss. “Inch.”
My body went from warm to on fire at his touch, and my pulse quickened. “That might be the best idea you ever had.”
He continued, kissing every bruise, every scrape, and every injury I’d suffered, starting at my feet and slowly working his way up my body. With each touch of his lips to my skin, my body flooded with emotion until I was drowning in pleasure. He made low, throaty noises with each touch that only fueled my desire.
He carefully lifted my loose cotton sundress over my body, tossing it aside before he continued laying more tiny kisses over my hips and stomach. My muscles clenched at his touch and a small moan escaped my lips. His mouth was hot against my skin, moving up to my ribs. He was even more gentle as his brushed his lips against them, since it would take longer for them to heal. But I didn’t want him to be gentle. Each touch, each brush of his lips, kindled my hunger for him until it consumed me. I no longer felt any pain, just pleasure. And I wanted more.
Grant skimmed by my breasts, and I whimpered. I wanted his attentions there, but instead he continued kissing my collarbone and up the curve of my neck. By the time he reached my lips, I was ravenous for him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, but he resisted. He stroked my lips with the pad of his thumb. They were rough, slightly calloused from years of rowing. The texture clashed against the softness of my full lips. I parted them and my tongue slipped out, sucking his thumb into my mouth greedily.
His pupils dilated at my action but he didn’t pull it out. I traced my tongue from base to tip before adding more suction, simulating how I would love to pleasure him. His breathing caught and he pulled his thumb from my mouth, only to bend his head toward my face and cover his lips with my own.
He smelled faintly of sweat, that heady, sexy aroma that was all man. I inhaled deeply, wanting each of my senses to be consumed by this amazing man. He kept his weight completely off me, causing the muscles of his sculpted arms to flex under the thin jersey he wore. I ran my hand up them, fingering the contours and ridges, continuing over his back, scratching my nails down as we continued to kiss. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth, biting down gently. I gasped, groaning as his hands lowered to skim the sides of my chest.
“Are you feeling any pain?” Grant whispered.
“Nuh-uh. Nothing but pleasure,” I moaned. “So, so much pleasure.”
Grant’s lips left mine, moving along my cheek to nibble at my ear. “And are you getting new, happier memories of being in this bed?”
“Oh yes…” I paused. “But I think in order to really cement them in, I might need you to take it a step further. You know, really solidify it in my mind as the most vivid memory I have from this bed.”
“Hmm, is that so? More vivid? Well, I think I can make that happen.” He moved back over to my lips and hovered above them once more. His tongue slid along the edge, causing my lips to tingle at the contact, vibrating with pleasure. Hovering over me, his hair tickled my forehead deliciously, just another sensation that added to the mounting volcano that was ready to erupt.
He bent, and turned on his side, but still continuing to support my head as he lay down in the bed next to me. His arms wrapped around me, his body pressed against mine as my back arched with licentious intent. I could feel his heart hammering in his chest, pounding against me.
His arms snaked around my back and unclasped my bra, moving it out of the way. He placed the plump flesh into his hand, filling his palm as his thumb stroked over the hardened nipple that jutted out toward him. He took it into his mouth, sucking and biting the way I had with his thumb. It was delightfully torturous revenge, and I never wanted it to end.
My hands sought the hem of his shirt, wanting his flesh against my own. I tugged slightly, and he let go of my breast long enough to lean back and pull the shirt over his head. My eyes drank in the sight of his perfect, smooth skin the color of melted caramel mixed with warmed milk. It was beautiful, like the rest of him.
He looped his fingers around the edge of my panties, tugging at them. “Lift,” he ordered, his voice deep and commanding. I obeyed without a second thought, and he slid them down my body, careful to not snag them on my injured leg.
He placed a hand on either side of my knees and pushed slightly. “Spread your legs for me.”
An erotic flush ran through me, right down to my toes. My breath came hard, knowing and anticipating what was about to happen. I let my knees fall to the side. Grant lowered himself to me, sliding his fingers over my wetness, spreading it.
“So beautiful,” he murmured, his touch never relenting. His fingers continued to move over me, up and down until I squirmed uncontrollably.
“Stay still, Cupcake. Moving too
much will hurt your ribs.”
I groaned, but managed to keep still. He continued to toy with me, fingers tracing over every part of the epicenter of my need. My breath had quickened and I was almost panting now. My muscles coiled tightly from his touch, almost painfully.
He leaned forward, his warm breath against my skin.
“Please,” I whispered. “Grant, I need you.”
He granted my plea, dipping his head as his tongue darted out, licking me. I cried out, thankful for the touch but anxious for more. The flat of his tongue moved over and around in teasing little flicks. I arched my hips, but he laid a hand over them, pushing them back into the bed.
“Still.”
I whimpered, the need to move almost overwhelming. His tongue continued its sweet torment, but then a finger slid inside of me. I cried out, but managed to stay still. My legs shook, so close to the edge. The finger slid out, and he added a second as he pumped them in and out. Every nerve in my body was on edge, anxious for the next touch that would come.
His mouth covered my clit, sucking it into his mouth. I forgot to breathe. His fingers quickened their pace, plunging in and out, making my insides clench until my body exploded with sensation. I convulsed around him, unable to control myself. My chest heaved as I sucked in a deep breath, letting it out in a scream that echoed off the walls.
When the last shudder escaped my body, Grant removed his hand, laying a single kiss on top of that tiny bundle of nerves. I lay exhausted, trying to catch and slow my breath. My body ached deliciously from the uncontrollable movements of my orgasm, but I wouldn’t take it back. It was worth the pain. He repositioned his body so I could lay against his chest. He kissed the top of my head and I sighed.
“Best. Memory. Ever.”
Grant chuckled. “I’m glad, Cupcake.” He pulled the blanket up, covering me. “Rest now. I’m not going anywhere.”
I did exactly that, my body so delightfully wrung out that I drifted off, listening to the sound of Grant’s heartbeat in my ear.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Jillian swept her hair off her neck and held it up, turning around so her back was to me. I kissed the slope of her neck before fastening the necklace she’d handed me to place on her. “You ready for today? If it’s too much, I can tell the district attorney you’re not up to it. There’s enough evidence without your testimony.”
Jillian picked up silver dangle earrings and put them in. “No, I’m ready for this. I need to face him and let him know he didn’t break me. And having a part in locking him away will give me some closure. My therapist said it could really help, and I agree. I need to put this behind me so we can move forward.”
“Christian will be there too, you know. You okay with that?”
She leaned into my chest and grabbed hold of my arms, wrapping them around her. “He is my past. And you are my present and future.” She laid her head back against my chest. “After he wrote me that long letter from rehab, I forgave him. I can’t say I will ever trust him again, but I forgave him.”
I spun her around and captured her lips. “You never cease to amaze me, Cupcake. I’m the luckiest guy in the world.”
We made it to the courtroom and walked in, side-by-side and holding hands. We took a seat directly behind the prosecutor but still had about ten minutes before the trial was to begin. Originally, the trial wasn’t supposed to begin for another four months, but we were lucky the prosecutor pushed for it to be expedited, taking into account that school was starting soon.
Taking a look around, neither Christian nor the attacker, who we now knew was a mid-level dealer by the name of Kenny Meridan, were present yet. Kenny had a record a mile long, including several prior drug arrests, gun possession, and even domestic abuse. He’d served time before, both as a juvenile and adult, and while Georgia hadn’t adopted a “three strikes” rule like California, we were hopeful the bastard would get the maximum time not only for the drug charges, but also the attempted kidnapping and attempted murder charges he now faced.
Jillian’s knee bounced incessantly, and she began to bite the side of her thumb. I pulled it out of her mouth and covered her hand with my own.
“Just say the word if this becomes too much.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not that. I can do this. It’s the uncertainty of this whole process. What if the jury feels bad for him? Or they don’t believe me when I tell them what happened? Or what if his lawyer finds some sort of loophole that gets him off? I don’t want anyone else to have to go through what I did.”
I kissed her temple. “No one in their right mind would feel sorry for him, and even if they get some of the evidence tossed, there’s no way they can dismiss it all: fingerprints, DNA, your testimony, and Christian’s testimony. This douche bag is going away for a long, long time.”
She let out a nervous breath. “I’ll feel better when this whole thing is over.”
Ava and Trish sat behind us, offering Jillian encouragement and hugging her tight before taking their seats. Since JT wasn’t attached at Trish’s hip, I assumed they were fighting again. Those two had the most tumultuous on again and off again relationship I’d ever seen. They only knew two levels: frigid cold or boiling hot. In the two months they’d been dating, I think they’d broken up and gotten back together four times. Neither Jillian nor I knew what to make of them, but we both vowed to stay neutral parties in their antics.
“No JT?” Jillian asked.
Trish rolled her eyes. “That boy has gotten on my last nerve.”
Ava snickered. “Didn’t you say that the last two times?”
“I’m serious this time. He broke yet another date with me to do somethin’ for his momma. If it was serious like takin’ her to the doctor or somethin’, I wouldn’t mind. But he took her to play Bingo! Left me all dressed up in my favorite leopard-print dress and fuck-me boots to play Bingo with his mom, not even botherin’ to tell me until he was supposed to be at my house to pick me up. Well, I told him if he needed to spend so much time with her, fine. He could spend all of it with her for all I cared.”
I rolled my eyes and turned back around, kissing Jillian on the shoulder, grateful that she wasn’t as dramatic as her friend. Trish was amazingly smart and down to earth when it came to everything else, but when JT was involved it was all emotions with that girl.
Jillian’s mom, dad, and grandmother took seats next to us. Her sister had offered to fly in several times, but now that she was almost seven months pregnant, it was hard for her to travel. Mrs. Mayfield sniffed, blowing her nose in a slightly shredded tissue. She’d been a basket case through this whole ordeal, and I knew this trial was going to be painful for her, especially with Jillian and I heading back to college next week.
I thought turning down the internship with Google was going to be the end of my career, but my advisor notified me she’d already gotten several other interviews lined up with companies like Apple, Yahoo, and even the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation that started after I graduated with my Masters in the spring. I wasn’t sure where my plans would take me yet, but Jillian and I had already talked, and whatever I decided, I wouldn’t be going alone.
Jillian clutched my arm, breathing a sharp intake of air that betrayed how freaked out she really was. Kenny Meridan entered the courtroom looking smug. He glanced over at us and gave Jillian a little wink. I flew out of my seat, ready to end this before the trial even began, but the prosecutor stopped me.
“Walk away, Mr. Hardwick. Go get some air or water or something.”
Jillian pulled on my arm to try to get me to sit down, but I couldn’t. I had been forced to restrain myself from beating the shit out of Christian not once but twice now, and this motherfucker was goading me. I wanted to kill him. To pound his face in until he resembled a zombie from The Walking Dead.
“Grant?” Jillian’s voice brought me back, the quiver of her bottom lip sobering me. I wrapped my arms around her.
“He can’t hurt you now. I won’t let him.�
�
She swallowed hard and nodded. “I know. But I don’t want to attend a second trial for you.”
I kissed her forehead. “I’m good now. Honest.”
Finally, Christian came in seconds before the judge called the court to order, sitting opposite us. He half-smiled and waved but didn’t try to approach us. I hadn’t seen him since that night in the hospital and while Jillian might have forgiven him, I still had to make a conscious effort to stay in my seat and not pound the shit out of him for putting her through that. Jillian still spoke to his mother once a week or so, and I knew he was clean now and getting the help he needed. That was great and all, but I would still beat his ass if he even thought about going near Jillian again.
“The prosecution calls Jillian Mayfield to the stand.”
Jillian let out a nervous breath and stood, straightening her skirt. She didn’t move at first, just standing staring at Kenny.
“I love you, Cupcake. You got this.” I whispered, knowing she needed that little push.
She squared her shoulders and turned to me. “I love you, too. Always.”
Jillian looked poised and confident as she stepped into the witness box, placing her hand on the Bible.
“Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?”
She looked her attacker straight into the eye and nodded. “I do.”
EPILOGUE
I turned my key in the door, still reciting Russian conjugations. “Ya paidyu. Mi podium. Oni poidut.” I tossed my messenger bag on the couch before heading to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. I was up to my eyeballs in studying and couldn’t wait until finals were over. I loved learning languages, but I never wanted to learn another Chinese character or translate Russian verbs again. Or at least until next semester.
Grant came from the bedroom, phone attached to his ear. “Yes, I understand. Thank you so much for the opportunity. I look forward to working with you. Good night.”
Inhale, Exhale Page 18
