Winners

by Danielle Steel

  “You don’t like school?” Carole asked gently.

  “I used to. It’s been weird here. My friends don’t come to see me. I’ve lost touch with everyone. I think my injury scares them, or they’re nervous about coming to rehab. They’re always busy. I thought they’d visit me while I was here, but they don’t.” It was a common occurrence, and Carole heard it often from her patients.

  “It’ll be different when they see you again every day. They can’t ignore you then, and they’ll get used to seeing you in the chair.”

  “Yeah. Maybe,” Lily said, but she was obviously upset about it. She felt forgotten by them all.

  They stayed for a long time, and then Lily escorted them around to show them the facility. Carole had heard about Craig for years, but had never been there and was interested in it, and she enjoyed talking to Lily. They stopped at the main cafeteria to get something to drink, and ran into Teddy.

  “Where’ve you been all day?” she asked plaintively.

  “Painting,” he said happily, and then she introduced him to Carole, and he greeted everyone. “Where were you?” he asked Lily.

  “Shopping,” she said with a broad smile. “We went to the supermarket this morning, which was boring. Then we went to Neiman’s, Nordstrom’s, and Macy’s, it was really good.” Teddy laughed and looked happy to see her.

  “Are you the friend who’s going to compete in quad rugby?” Carole asked him, and he nodded.

  “I was thinking about basketball, but I can’t use an electric chair. I might do hockey. I haven’t decided yet.” Hockey and rugby were both brutal sports, and all three of the visitors were impressed.

  He joined them for the rest of the tour, and finally they were back in the lobby, and Carole turned to Lily.

  “I really enjoyed meeting you,” Carole said warmly. “I think The Lily Pad is going to be a very exciting place. I want you and Teddy to think of everything you want there. Your wish list will be our command,” she said, doing a little mock bow, and Lily smiled, admiring her beautifully cut dark hair again.

  “Thanks for coming to see me,” Lily said politely, and then kissed her father and Joe goodbye. They left, and she and Teddy headed back to her room. “I bought you CDs today,” she told him.

  “Which bands?” he asked with a delighted look.

  “Green Day, Blink-182, Good Charlotte, New Found Glory,” Lily ran down the list with a grin.

  “All right!” he said, and leaned over to kiss her on the cheek, and she laughed. She had had a good day, and so had he. He was happy with his paintings. “I liked your dad’s friend, by the way,” Teddy commented as they got to her room.

  “Yeah, me too. She’s a psychologist from Mass General, who specializes in SCI kids. My dad wants to hire her for The Lily Pad.”

  “She seems smart.”

  “I love her hair, and her nails,” Lily said dreamily, and Teddy laughed at her as she spread out the CDs she had bought him on the bed so he could see them.

  “You’re pathetic,” he teased her. “The woman is a psychologist at one of the most prestigious hospitals in the country, and you like her hair and nail polish.”

  “Well, those things count too,” Lily said staunchly, looking at her pale nails that hadn’t seen polish in four months. She was too lazy to do them herself, and she hadn’t been anywhere to buy nail polish in ages, until today, but she hadn’t thought about it. She had bought two sweaters, a jacket, and the CDs for Teddy, and new Nikes to wear in therapy. They were hot pink.

  “She’s a lovely girl,” Carole said about Lily after they left Craig. She could see easily why Jessie liked her so much. She was bright, kind, polite, nice to talk to. She was obviously devoted to her father, and comfortable with adults. And it was clear that Bill loved her deeply, and wanted to help her in every possible way.

  “I worry about her skiing again,” Bill admitted, “and competing. She’s been through enough.”

  “It’s what she loves,” Carole said gently.

  “It’s her life,” Bill said.

  “Do you ski?” Joe asked her then. He had been admiring her quietly from the backseat.

  “I used to,” she said, smiling at him. He was a quiet man, and less forceful than Bill, but she could see that he had great depth to him, and she liked his suggestions about their project.

  “You should bring ski clothes the next time you come out. There’s skiing very close to the city.”

  “I don’t have much time while I’m here,” she said regretfully, “which reminds me, is there a department store where you gentlemen could drop me off? I want to do a quick errand. I can take a cab back to the hotel.” Bill said they were fairly close to Neiman’s and offered to take her there.

  “Are you up to dinner tonight?” Bill asked her. “It might be fun to go to one of the local restaurants.”

  “That would be nice,” she said, smiling at him, wondering if Joe would come too. She wasn’t sure she wanted to have dinner alone with Bill. It might give him the wrong impression. This was a strictly professional trip for her, but she didn’t want to decline and be rude.

  “What about Table 6?” Joe suggested to Bill, and he seemed to like the idea, which gave her the impression that Joe might come along, which she preferred. Besides, they might have more ideas for their rehab center at dinner. She wanted to use every moment for work.

  Bill dropped her off at Neiman’s a few minutes later and told her they’d pick her up at the hotel at eight.

  “Thank you again for today,” she said as she got out and waved at them both, and then hurried into the store. She knew just what she wanted, and went to the cosmetics department. She picked four nail polish colors, including the one she was wearing, a small manicure kit, quick dry spray for nails, some hair conditioners and gels, and a relaxing face mask. She had them put it all in a box and gift wrap it, and she dropped it off by cab at Craig for Lily a few minutes later and went back to her hotel. She had time to lie down and relax for an hour before she dressed for dinner. And she took her wig off while she lay down. She had seen Lily staring at it that afternoon and wondered if she knew. She would have told her if the men hadn’t been there, but she didn’t want them to know. She rubbed the peach fuzz on her head, and closed her eyes and took a nap. She still got a little more tired than she used to, but it was getting better, and she was enjoying her life fully these days.

  And at seven o’clock she put on a different sweater, a skirt, and high heels, washed her face, put on fresh makeup, brushed her wig, and put it back on. And she was in the lobby when Bill and Joe came to pick her up. Both men were wearing sport jackets, and Joe had worn a tie. He still looked very New York, and Bill was more casual. She liked the way they both dressed. They were handsome men. Her husband had looked like a slightly younger version of Joe. He had the same very eastern style. It suited him, and appealed to her, but Dylan had turned out to be a bad guy. Her life was much better now.

  “I want to thank you,” Bill said, as soon as Carole got into the car. “Lily called me—she didn’t know how to reach you, or what hotel you were staying at. Apparently, you dropped off some fantastic stuff to her at Craig. She was all excited about it, nail polish and hair stuff and I don’t know what else. She loved it. I gave her your e-mail address so she could thank you. I hope you don’t mind.” And as he said it, a message popped up on Carole’s BlackBerry, and she checked it. It was an ecstatic e-mail from Lily, thanking her for everything. Carole smiled.

  “I’m glad she liked it. She kind of woke me up to how important those little things are. Sometimes I forget.” She had missed manicures too when she was sick. Now they made her feel human again. And she had already forgotten until Lily mentioned it that afternoon how much she missed getting manicures and having her hair done when she needed it most. They were the little feminine touches that made a big difference.

  The restaurant Joe suggested had a quiet cozy atmosphere and great food, and they had a relaxed, easy conversation and somehow wound
up on the subject of marriage. Carole and Joe both said they were divorced, and Bill that he was widowed, which Carole knew from Jessie.

  “My wife ran off to Nepal to follow her guru,” Joe said with a wry look. “A midlife crisis, I think. Or maybe I drove her to it,” he said, laughing. He was feeling better about it now that he had moved to Denver, and had a new project with Bill. Life had looked extremely bleak for a while, but he didn’t say that at dinner.

  “My husband ran like hell when I was diagnosed with cancer. Apparently, statistically that’s pretty common. I just didn’t enjoy being one of those statistics,” she said. “But I’m fine. I’m healthy again, and life is good.” She seemed to have a very sane attitude about it, which impressed both men. They were both shocked by the story.

  “That’s a pretty rotten thing to do,” Bill commented sympathetically. “You’re very reasonable about it. I’m not sure I would be. In fact, I know I wouldn’t. I hope you stuck him for a fortune,” Bill said, and she laughed out loud.

  “No, I didn’t. Maybe I should have. I was too sick to care about the money. And now I’m fine.” She looked happy and at peace, and optimistic, and in fact, she was grateful to be alive. She had a positive outlook that seemed to permeate everything she did. And all three of them were enjoying the evening together.

  And as they finished dinner, Lily was painting her nails the same color as Carole’s, thanks to her thoughtful gift. She was a happy girl that night, and Teddy pretended to scream in terror when he rolled into her room and saw her in the face mask.

  “Is that what you look like without makeup? Shit, Lily, you’re scary.”

  “Don’t make me laugh, I’ll crack the mask,” she said through clenched teeth.

  “Yeah, whatever, Countess Dracula,” he said, shaking his head, and motored back to his own room.

  Chapter 16

  JESSIE FINISHED WORK late, as she did every night now. She could never seem to get out of the office early enough to get home, relax for a few minutes, talk to the kids, and cook a decent dinner. Instead, she was always running behind, the grocery stores were closed, the kids were fighting over something when she got in, homework wasn’t done, and there was nothing in the house to cook except frozen pizza or hamburgers. Tim had been dead for exactly ninety-one days, and she felt as though her life was out of control.

  Adam and Jimmy were fighting over the PlayStation in the living room when she got home, Chris was nowhere to be found but his car was outside so she knew he was in, and Heather was on the phone in her room, paying no attention to her younger brothers trying to kill each other. And the house looked a mess. Jessie went straight into the kitchen and stuck two frozen pizzas in the oven, for the third time that week, feeling like someone was going to report her for child abuse, or neglect at the very least. There was no one to pick up the slack for her now, and the kids didn’t do it. They were upset too. Heather’s grades had been in the toilet for three months since her father died. She might as well have stayed home from school. Her last report card was all incompletes, Ds, and an F, in PE, for not even showing up.

  “Not pizza again!” Adam said with a look of disgust as he walked into the kitchen.

  “I’m sorry. I had an emergency at six o’clock, a kid with a concussion. I had to admit him.” She talked to him like he was a fellow physician, instead of a child who needed a mother and a decent meal. “Tell everyone to come down to dinner,” she said with a look of despair. She felt like she was getting Fs too, in mother, provider, and cook. The only thing she still seemed able to do decently was work. She hadn’t killed any of her patients yet.

  Chris came to the table, looking worried, and Heather gave Adam a shove when he helped himself first.

  “How was your day, Mom?” Jimmy asked her politely, and she smiled. He was the only bright spot in the group, and she knew he was missing his father too. But he was as sweet as Tim had been and as nice to her.

  “A little rocky,” she said honestly, and looked around the table. “How about all of you? Decent day?” They didn’t look it, but you never knew. Miracles could happen. “Did you go to PE?” she asked Heather, who made a face. “Does that mean yes, I hope?”

  “It means I had too much homework and had to come home.” She knew that was an ironclad excuse, or would have been if she hadn’t been getting straight Ds. Clearly she wasn’t doing her homework either, and Jessie never seemed to have time to check it or help them anymore. By the time she cleaned up the kitchen, did laundry, paid bills, and tidied up, they were all asleep.

  “We’re going on a field trip to Sacramento next week. To the Hall of Fame Museum,” Adam announced. “This time don’t forget to give me the money.”

  “I’ll try not to.” The teacher had had to pay for him the last time they went on a field trip, but it was three weeks after Tim died, and Jessie was brain-dead or felt like it. She still did. She never seemed to catch up. And in two more weeks they’d have spring break and would be home alone and have nothing to do, which was worse. She had to remember to hire a sitter for the week, to drive them around and give them lunch. She couldn’t expect Chris to do it every day. It wasn’t fair to him, and they might kill each other over the PlayStation.

  All of them ate quickly, as they always did now, and went back upstairs to their rooms. Jimmy gave her a kiss before he did. The others each rinsed their plate, put it in the dishwasher, and left, except Chris, who lingered to talk to his mother.

  “What’s up?” Jessie said. She could tell he had something to say to her. She just hoped he hadn’t gotten someone pregnant. She could only think of worst-case scenarios these days. What else was there? After Tim dying, anything could happen.

  “I got my letters today,” he said with a meaningful look.

  “Letters? What letters?” Her mind was a blank.

  “My acceptance letters, Mom!” he said, visibly annoyed at her. She was like a zombie these days, which was how she felt by the time she got home. She just couldn’t manage working all day, and being there for all four of them, without Tim’s help. But she knew she had to, and would get used to it eventually. She still cried herself to sleep every night, and slept in his pajamas. “My college acceptance letters,” he said with emphasis, and she got it.

  “I’m sorry. I forgot. So?” She sat down at the kitchen table and looked at him expectantly with a smile. “Tell me!”

  “I got into Princeton, Harvard, and Yale,” he said with a grin.

  “Very funny.” He had refused to apply to any eastern schools, and his grades weren’t good enough for the Ivy League. He had only applied to schools in the West.

  “I got into Arizona,” he said, which he knew was a no from her, because she was convinced it was a party school, and Tim had agreed with her, but Chris had applied anyway. His getting in there was no surprise.

  “I didn’t get into Berkeley or UCSB.” She was disappointed to hear it. She knew he had only applied to five, although she had wanted him to apply to more, but Tim let him off the hook, softie that he was. “And I got into Boulder and DU.” He looked pleased as he said it, she knew he wanted to ski, and DU was the University of Denver, which he preferred over Boulder, and so did she.

  “You look happy. So what do you think?” She was too tired to get excited and pretend to be overjoyed over two schools she hadn’t been wild about in the first place. She wished he had gotten into Berkeley, but his GPA hadn’t been high enough, nor his test scores. He had never been a great student. He had improved somewhat during senior year, but it was too late. His junior year had been too weak. “What are you feeling about those two? I know you liked them both when we saw them.” He seemed to hesitate between the two, which surprised her. He had been leaning toward Boulder before, although neither she nor Tim had loved it, and then he had favored DU. Now he didn’t look sure.

  “I really like Boulder, but I know Dad liked DU better, so I’m kind of leaning toward DU,” he said, which took her breath away. It was his way of pleasing his fath
er posthumously, which almost ripped her heart out. And she wanted to be supportive of whichever school he chose. They needed something to be hopeful about these days.

  “I like it too, but you have to feel good about it,” she said, gently touching his arm, and then his cheek. They exchanged a long look, and she smiled at him, fighting back tears. “I want you to be happy, baby. Daddy would want that too.” He nodded, and she saw that there were tears in his eyes too. He gave her a hug then, and she choked on a sob.

  “I’m going to go to DU. I liked it,” he said quietly.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah, I am. And two of the guys in my class are going there. We’re going to try to room together.”

  “It’s funny. I have a consulting job there, so I can visit you whenever I go.”

  “What kind of consulting job?” He looked surprised. She had never done that before. But she could use the income now, if they paid her. If she went regularly, she was going to charge Bill Thomas a small fee, but not if she just went once or twice.

  “Someone’s starting a rehab hospital for SCI kids. I’m just giving them advice.” He nodded, not particularly interested, but he seemed pleased with his decision, and he said he might join the ski team, or the swim team. He was a fabulous athlete and excelled at both. It was hard to believe he was leaving for college. It had all happened so soon. She dreaded his going now, and it was less than five months away. “So are you sure about DU?”

  “Yes, I am.” He seemed pleased with the decision, hugged her again, and went back upstairs. She went to kiss Jimmy goodnight then, but he was already sound asleep when she got there. It happened every night. She stuck her head into Adam’s room and told him to brush his teeth and go to bed. And when she checked on Heather, she was back on the phone.

  “Is your homework done?” Jessie mouthed at her, and Heather nodded and pointed at the door for her to leave. She considered all her phone conversations top secret and didn’t want her mother hanging around to listen in.