Sand Glass

by A M Russell

  ‘Yes….or perhaps what to forget. But who can say?’

  ‘No one,’ I sighed, and he looked at me and smiled. An easy smile. One now that seemed suffused with peace.

  I looked at the glass in front of him still untouched, then I yawned, ‘How do you feel?’

  ‘Tired…. Just tired.’ Jared lay back in the chair and closed his eyes.

  A couple of minutes later I took both glasses back downstairs. Sam and George both looked up at me. Sam was blowing smoke rings again.

  ‘Violette had to go back to the other house.’ said George. He eyed the two glasses questioningly.

  ‘I’d like some herb tea if you have it.’ I said and sat down.

  ‘We do,’ said Sam springing right up, ‘One cup or two?’

  ‘Just one I guess.’

  ‘Is everything okay?’ George looked in a worried way at me.

  ‘What time is it?’ I asked him. ‘Is Marcia coming round later?’

  ‘Yeah, sure.’ Sam stuck the fag out the side of his mouth as he dialled the number. He glanced up at me, ‘George, will you make the herbal concoction? I’ll collect her. Just make sure she’s expecting me first.’

  I went back upstairs. Sam followed me a moment later. He looked over at Jared, relaxed in the chair; ‘What did you do?’

  ‘Divine Alchemy.’ I said, ‘Do you think you can get him into the bed?’

  ‘No problem.’ Sam seemed to scoop Jared up easily and lay him on the half folded-back covers.

  ‘How do you do that?’

  ‘Practice. I train twice a week normally too. But may be the fact that he’s lost a lot a weight might have made it easier.’ Sam leaned over Jared for a moment. ‘He’s as light as Jules at the moment.’

  ‘I think we all are.’

  ‘They be nothing left of you! You’re a scraggy stringy kid.’

  ‘I’m not a kid.’

  ‘Apologies Davey.’

  George came in, ‘Marcia is on her way. James is bringing her over. He was round there.’

  ‘Where at?’ I asked.

  ‘At work. I think they were pulling an all-night stint doing prep for some big function.’

  ‘Devotion to duty.’ said Sam, ‘I’ll get downstairs. I think we have the first grey light of dawn peeping through. I’ll do breakfast in an hour and a half. At eight thirty.’

  ‘It’s seven now?’ I swayed slightly.

  ‘Whoa! Steady there!’ Sam caught me, I felt very dizzy suddenly. They took me to the bedroom next door. Everything felt like it was going round. George bent over me. ‘You really need to rest.’

  ‘I really need to puke.’ I said.

  ‘Stay here.’ said George. He came back a moment later with the necessary bucket and towels and kitchen roll.

  ‘You are not getting enough rest…. And I think this has all been too much. I’m going to give you something to get you relax properly.’ George pulled my sleeve up.

  ‘Please ask Janey to come.’

  ‘She’ll be here when you wake up.’ He touched my arm. Or rather that’s what it felt like.

  ‘Where is Janey?’

  ‘She’s nearby. At Violette’s brother’s house. I’ll ring Violette in the morning. You’ll see her. It’s alright now.’ He put his hand on my forehead for a moment.

  ‘You really are the strangest kid.’ He pulled open the buttons at the neck of the sweater; ‘So it is true….’ My eyes opened for a moment, and then I drifted into the warm soft enfolding blanket of the tranquiliser.

  I woke and felt in some languid sense, better. This time relaxed. Sunlight streamed in across the warm colours of a rug. In the arm chair by the bed someone sat. There was a silence that was warm, enfolding as if I had risen to the surface through tropical waters. I was now floating on the surface of a pool of light and living silence. It was like that pool the one we had dived into long ago. I saw images from within: as if from another’s mind; entering the door while the light was just breaking the gloom with edges of perspective and dimension.

  I saw myself asleep. A pale figure, looking like a tall slender boy. I saw long lashes and lips parted in an exhaled breath. I saw a slight movement of his head; He was me….. turning in sleep as the one who came in bent over and kissed him.... My perception mingled then, a memory of two people connected.

  I turned a little. She was there.... Dressed in lilac colours, eyes closed; hair in waves of reddish gold down to her waist.

  I saw then a memory. I thought her paler, distant, teasing as if playing with me, but I remembered that kiss - that one at the egg land camp. And this time I remembered it right. I thought she was full of colour and light. A Medieval painting come to life.

  Her eyes opened and she regarded me without moving. What moment might follow? It would decide everything.

  She moved first because I could not. She was blinking quickly, her eyes were a deeper blue than I remembered, the pale hair was richer and warmer toned, she knelt by the bed and her fingertips touched mine across the covers.

  'David.' she said.

  'Janey....’ my mouth felt dry, ‘I wanted to see you.'

  'Here I am.' she spoke without defensiveness this time.

  'Janey, I'm still not right.'

  'George will be here in a minute or two.' she rose and sat again in the chair.

  As on cue, George appeared. And just behind him the lovely Violette, who stood next to Janey while George checked me over.

  They sat me up and George left the room.

  Janey moved as Violette sat by me.

  'You gave us quite a fright last night.... Or rather early this morning.' she looked into my eyes with a doctory kind of scrutiny.

  'What happened?'

  'We'll only tell you when you're fully recovered. Jules has been through a similar thing. That was to do with.... Well I'll leave that for now.'

  'Thanks Doctor.'

  'You are most welcome.' she smiled in a way that lit up the room, 'this new branch of medicine is my exclusive expert project. I have successfully treated three severe “Time Sickness” cases, and some minor ones as well.'

  'What did you do?'

  'Ah! Time is like a wave that beats upon a shore. Or like the rhythm of a musical piece. The differences that we don't notice happen all the time. I discovered that this was rather like four beats to the bar, against seven beats; and one of them is speeding up, or slowing down at different times. The symptoms include.... well, you know those already. You may have some of these again. Don't be concerned. The treatment is simple.'

  'What did you do?'

  'We needed something rhythmic. Music, or a rhyme. The mind fastens on those things; especially familiar things. The mind and body respond to the right kind of music and rhythm, and the presence of others. Human voices singing, various acoustic sounds. Forget anything electronically generated! It's doesn't root in the subconscious in most people. It has to be deeper than that. An anchor to keep the shirring tides from pulling you away. We worked on it all night during one day last week. Then we hit on the right combination of treatment.'

  'What is that then?' I coughed and Janey came to my other side.

  'Similar ingredients but tailored to the individual. You are certainly a puzzle Mr Milnes! Sam told us what we needed to know. Alex confirmed it. Odd but it worked.'

  'Oh?'

  'Rhymes, limericks, verbal rhythmic patterns.' she stood, 'I'll go down now. Sam is doing Lunch with Alex's help.'

  'That is bizarre!' I said and rubbed my chest again.

  'They are getting on just fine! Sam is doing what he's told.'

  'Yeah! That will work.' I said, and coughed again.

  'No talking! Not for a while. You'll get lunch soon.’ Violette slid gracefully from the room.

  'Jared is alright now…. Well he seems to be,' said Janey, 'Marcia is with him. I think they are playing scrabble.'

  'Word puzzles.'

  'Yes.' she sat quite still.

  'Janey?'

  'Yes.'


  'How long have you been here?'

  'Since nine.'

  'What?'

  'I came over when you had stopped reacting….. after you stopped. Like having a fit I suppose. I was up anyway. Violette, George, and Alex were all in here tending to you earlier this morning.'

  'Alex disappeared....'

  'He was over with me and Violette. Then they came back.' She gave me a worried look, ‘I’m glad you are back with us.’

  I was silent for several seconds wondering what to say.

  'I must have had a narrow....' I coughed again,

  'Escape. Yes.' Janey regarded me solemnly for a moment, then smiled.

  'Thanks for being here.' I wheezed.

  'The Tea Tray is coming up.' said Janey, 'no more talking

  I had been led to a room I had never been in before, a big sitting room. Janey went to find Alex to tell him I was down. Violette came in a moment later and lit some candles in the centre. There was a soothing fragrance. Was it lavender?

  ‘You will not get up David.’ said Violette firmly, ‘Let them all come in and join you. You will tell me if you feel dizzy or sick again won’t you?’

  ‘Yes Doc.’ I said in a humble little voice. I really didn’t have the strength to argue.

  Jared came in then.

  ‘Sit next to David.’ ordered Violette.

  ‘Okay.’ Jared said in a husky drawl. He sat and immediately laid his head back into the cushions. Violette left. There was a big clock that ticked with that old-fashioned clunky tone. After a while you didn’t hear it. But it was kind of hypnotic all the same.

  Then, in ones and twos they came in: all the team. James, Marcia, Adam and Joe. Peter (Curly), Oliver, Janey, and Jules. And lastly Nikolas, who looked really a lot better.

  Jules and Nik, who had not seen us back at the beach or at any time before or since, regarded Jared and me with a kind of awed reverence; it was somewhat overwhelming. Jules in particular seemed to be very emotional about the whole thing. Violette let him sit next to me in my right.

  ‘How’s the arm?’ Jules whispered.

  ‘Better than the rest of me.’ I said back.

  Jules smiled hugely, ‘You really are a very clever cat.’ He said.

  ‘Not as clever as you it seems.’ I said.

  Alex and Sam entered, followed by Kyle, he was the note taker for this debrief. George came in with a folder and a box.

  ‘This time I’m not asking for tags back.’ said George, ‘I need you to keep them on for a while longer.’

  ‘Why is that?’ aid Marcia.

  ‘I will tell you all about Sandglass.’ said George, ‘this information does not leave this room. You do not divulge this to another living soul. Not even between yourselves outside the walls of this house.’

  Everyone silently nodded.

  ‘The experiment is still running,’ said George, ‘that is, Nimbus is still running. It has gone to a different stage. All of you are no threat now. I have scrambled the readers so that only us… that is Sandglass can gather the information from them. Officially they were destroyed.’

  ‘How?’ asked Jules, and put his glasses on to look at the papers George handed him.

  ‘Salt water.’ said George.

  ‘Yes,’ Jules replied, ‘that would do it. Janey and Curly can look at this too. We need to make sure the channel is secure.’

  ‘Is everyone still in possession of a tag?’ I asked thinking that it all seemed a bit ad hoc.

  ‘Yes everyone.’ said George.

  I turned to Jared as he pulled his tag out, and then the pendant. Round the room it went. Everyone was wearing there’s. Lastly I showed mine to the assembled group. The chain was tangled with the cross my mother had given me. I remembered the weather. Rain, snow then sun…. then snow again.

  Someone was speaking. My mind had wandered there; I focused back on the speaker: Alex.

  ‘You want me to be part of this. But I won’t be tagged like a piece of lost luggage!’

  ‘You’re already part of this,’ said George, ‘and this is expensive kit. I don’t give it out to just anyone.’

  ‘That’s what worries me!’ Alex looked at me, ‘These friends of yours are very, very mad you know!’

  ‘Yeah… I know.’ I said casually.

  We continued on the debrief.

  The most noteworthy item was the absence of Mr Andrew Hanson, sociology lecturer. George told us that the readings on him were still coming through. The tag was still being worn and was still active. We were all asked to make comments on anything we needed to say. No one had much…. But then questions….

  That was a different matter. The atmosphere was tense with a kind of curiosity normally only reserved for the revealing of dark family secrets, or the reading of wills.

  I was Curly who broke the silence that the ticking clock was making its own.

  ‘What is beyond the Cloud Field?’

  They all looked at the four of us: Janey, Marcia, Jared and me.

  Marcia turned to the three then Janey and Jared looked to me.

  I felt….alone. My friends, and I couldn’t say. People I loved and had been beaten by the elements with, side by side. I could not say it to them. Violette was looking at me in a different way. Not curiosity, but concern.

  What could I say?

  ‘I went to the edge of the world,’ I said, ‘and then I came back to find you.’

  ‘But what is there?’ Curly again.

  ‘I thought you knew?’ I asked him, ‘you went there.’

  He looked away, before he spoke. ‘There was a wall. At the end of one small piece of rope. And that is all.’ Curly looked disappointed.

  ‘That first time,’ said Janey, there was a wall… as Peter says. But I found a gate.’

  ‘It is not what it seems.’ Jared spoke then. Everyone’s attention was swiftly directed at him, as he had been silent for so long.

  ‘What isn’t it?’ Sam this time.

  ‘I am not the strongest of you all. But perhaps I am the most knowledgeable in some things.’ said Jared, ‘but this is like a puzzle with some of the pieces missing. David is my friend. Please don’t ask him about it again. It’s not what you think it is.’

  ‘Why?’ asked Curly, ‘what is it?’

  ‘You are not a poet, or an artist. But most importantly, you do not yet believe in anything after this life…. You are still being pursued by the dark truth of yourself…’ Jared seemed to grow as he said this, ‘It is better to ask the questions that you want to know answers to for yourself.’

  ‘Why didn’t I see something?’ said Curly.

  ‘The right question.’ said Jared, and sank back into his seat again.

  Violette tutted, ‘This time you will let me speak.’ She gave George a hard stare. He indicated she should address the group.

  ‘I have seen many things as a doctor. Some that you would really not want to know. But now I have within my care, you all. And time is awash with casualties of a confrontation that has been carried out… perpetrated by certain people for some time. I am thoroughly opposed to the reasons for trying to alter any person’s fate. At whatever cost to any individual. Never the less; I am even more opposed to people I have in my charge being badly treated. So whatever you thought on this matter. I am not, under any circumstances playing back to the directorship your personal info sessions, your log entries or any other such thing. I think it’s time we all respected each other’s privacy. Unless something really needs to be said… it’s better to let it remain where it is.’

  The silence like a passing shower that ensued after Violette’s legs had been stared at for a full three minutes, was broken into by George.

  ‘Individuals can be booked for sessions right now, before anyone leaves today. You will receive an innocuous letter in the post. Kyle will check everyone’s contact address before you leave as well. And we will be rechecking the situation after December now. Anything else, ring the number that Violette supplies you with. You can get an
y of us on that number at any time.’

  The meeting broke up after that. Tea and buns characteristically supplied, this time by Marcia and James. It felt like the end of the party for real now.

  *****

  Sixteen

  Just over three weeks later I was dodging in a tint on a design; and looking up periodically to see if Alex was coming back with the coffee. He arrived with new mugs. Bright colours.

  ‘What happened?’

  ‘Someone had an accident,’ said Alex Jauntily, ‘you know what happens when you wash up sometimes.’

  I wasn’t sure if he had been involved, but the new mugs were cheery and suited the impending Christmassy party that we were finally summoned to.

  ‘Do you play?’ asked the Mikey character.

  ‘Play what?’ I said absently, still concentrating on my work.

  ‘Golf.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘No?’

  ‘What the problem with you?’ Alex interjected, ‘it does not require a working knowledge of the game to attend a golf club for the reasons stated.’

  ‘Which are?’ said Mikey stiffly.

  ‘Your call.’ said Alex to me. He’s been doing that a lot these days. Perhaps he wanted me to assert myself with the newbies. There had been several since the summer.

  ‘Enjoying yourself means not being made to walk three miles round a cold hilly landscape beset by ball nicking squirrels.’ I looked up.

  Mikey was suddenly in need of collecting a file from another office on another floor.

  ‘Very good.’ said Alex, ‘A bit wordy though.’

  ‘I’m still learning.’

  ‘Yeah… not quite the Newbie now though, got a few stripes.’ Alex smirked as Mikey tripped over someone’s injudiciously placed waste bin down the end of the studio.

  I found myself rubbing my chest again. A hot bath I decided, when I got home. I saw Alex looking at me. That look he would never ever show in anyone else’s presence.

  ‘Alright there Davey?’ he said almost as an aside.

  ‘Yeah.’

  Saturday. Six pm. I stood in my bathroom trying to tie the silk tie that Alex had given me. I was really fouling up. I heard him crashing in through my door.