Our Song

by Savannah Kade

  John Hewlitt. The fifth song.

  It had to be. So she punched the skip button until it was on the right track. A guitar picked notes off, until the voice joined. It was Tim McGraw singing, not JD. And in Tim’s voice it sounded like he’d lost his lover.

  But the words weren’t that specific. They spoke of “when I was your golden boy” and how you sometimes had to leave, and better yourself, even when those who loved you couldn’t understand. Even if they wouldn’t love you anymore.

  In Tim’s voice she heard the regret and longing, and right there in the parking lot at Wal-Mart, she broke down and cried.

  “Kelsey!”

  She heard her name through the dream. JD was calling to her but she couldn’t see him.

  “Kelsey!” It was getting louder.

  “Wake up!” And more specific.

  She fought through the haze to the hand tapping hers, to the none-too-gentle jostles to her shoulders.

  “Wake up!”

  She sat bolt upright, terrified. “What’s wrong? The kids?”

  “Nothing’s wrong!”

  Her alarm clock said 2:42. The pitch black around her said that was 2:42 a.m.

  JD was beside her bed, holding her hand, tugging her up. “I have news.”

  He pulled her down the hallway, while her eyes blinked and her brain turned over. In the kitchen he flipped the light on to blind her.

  “Ah!” She raised her arms and shielded her eyes from the bright-burn.

  “Here.”

  She heard the fridge door open, and the pop and fizz of a fresh can of coke. He pressed the cold metal into her hand, and obligingly she took a drink. “So, I’m guessing Brenda signed you.”

  “What?”

  She immediately regretted it. He deflated like a popped balloon.

  “Yes, she offered. You knew? . . . Of course, you knew.” Somewhere in the bright she saw his hands wave then settle on his hips as he wandered the kitchen. “You’ve been our angel all along. I don’t know whether to hug you or hate you.”

  She could feel the caffeine hit her system. He was right, she did have a habit. But like all good addicts she ignored it. “The hugging I’m on board with, the hating, not so much.”

  He snorted.

  “Why would you hate me for this? I thought it was what you wanted, I’m sorry if-”

  “Shut up.” He grabbed her and twirled her around, open coke can and all.

  For a moment her breath caught on the thought that he would kiss her.

  When he finally set her back down, he explained. “I was going to hate you for not telling us. But I’ll let you defend yourself first.”

  She took another slug of the coke. “You said you play every night like there’s an agent out there. I didn’t know if she’d make it, or even what kind of music she worked with. I guess I didn’t want you getting your hopes up if it was nothing.”

  “What are you, my mother?”

  She was fully awake now, and that burned. “Ouch.”

  “Yeah, you deserve it. You should have told us.”

  Leaning against the counter, she crossed her arms and conceded. “You’re right. I won’t do it again. Forgive me?”

  He smiled. “Always.”

  It turned out Brenda was anxious to sign them. Kelsey had never seen the guys so keyed up.

  JD walked the whole way to drop off Daniel and Andie with his feet about ten inches off the ground. Kelsey felt the need to grab him periodically and tug him back down to earth.

  When they returned to her house, Craig, Alex and TJ were all sitting around the table waiting. Kelsey wasn’t surprised. She’d given them all keys, and she actually felt safer than she ever had, knowing that anyone casing the house saw four sturdy men coming and going all hours of the day.

  One by one they stood up and hugged her, and thanked her.

  “I didn’t do it. Maggie knew Brenda. She liked you guys, she said she was bringing Brenda.”

  They disagreed.

  She wound up cooking pancakes. Allie was the only calming influence on them. You knew things were keyed-up when Allie was the calm one.

  Her daughter had grown so used to having them around that she thought nothing of asking Craig for his last sausage patty. What was more surprising was that he simply handed it over. “Here you go, squirt.”

  “I’m not a squirt.”

  “Yes, you are.” He stuffed the sausage in her mouth, making her giggle.

  God, the world had simply turned upside down.

  After they left, she and Allie played card games and watched far too many children’s shows waiting for the phone to ring.

  The call didn’t come. Four grown men burst through her door at 2:33 p.m. acting like schoolboys. Even Alex was effusive. Only JD stood calmly by, his eyes wide open and bright.

  It took a good ten minutes to get the whole story. Brenda had explained the contract, and they all agreed they were probably seven kinds of fool, but signed on the spot. By noon, one of the other partners at the agency had them booked to play that weekend’s nearby Cornbread Festival, and they had to have a single ready to sell by then.

  “Holy shit!” That was her own voice. She didn’t apologize, even when Allie began yelling “holy shit holy shit holy shit.”

  Craig told her she was right.

  The guys even agreed to stay home with Allie while JD and Kelsey walked over to get Daniel and Andie, if they could raid the fridge. There was something in JD’s eyes that made her give them free reign.

  It took JD a full block to start talking.

  “She wants to put us on tour. To cut the album over the next month, then put us on the road. Opening for whoever she can find.”

  “That’s amazing. That’s great. But . . .”

  “I can’t leave Andie for that kind of time.”

  She smiled. “I’ve got her. You go. I guess we weren’t thinking ahead, but anyone who signs you is going to want you to tour.” She shrugged. “So . . .”

  “I can’t ask you to do that.”

  She laughed. “I don’t recall being asked. I volunteered.”

  “I can’t leave Andie for that long. It might be a month at a time.” His hands were in his hair, and she was afraid he was about to bald himself.

  “So I said I couldn’t tour like that, and I bowed out. I told them to sign without me.”

  “JD!” Her heart clenched. He’d already given up everything for Andie. Everything but this, and now-

  She saw it, “The guys didn’t let you. They won’t tour without you.”

  “How did you know?” He stopped dead on the sidewalk, almost causing another late dad to run smack into him.

  “Because they’re not stupid. You said yourself that you guys sounded good, but when you got TJ in you finally found your synergy.”

  “But that was TJ.”

  “You’re not stupid either JD. You wouldn’t tour without Alex or Craig. Why on earth would you think they’d go without you?”

  He nodded. “Brenda said she understood about kids. That she’d work something out. Even if we couldn’t tour.”

  Kelsey turned to look at him. “You’ll tour. I’ll keep Andie.”

  He started to protest but she cut him off with a shake of her head. They were at the gate.

  JD changed the topic. “You don’t seem that excited about this.” He lowered his head until his gaze was level with hers. As though he might look into her head. “What’s going on in there?”

  “I’m very happy for you. I’m just not as surprised as you. It was always just a matter of when. You really are that good.”

  His shoulders sagged and his head tilted. “You had faith in us all along. Thank you.”

  He enfolded her into a huge hug, right there at the gate of the school. His arms were a strong band around her shoulders, and she could smell the leather of his bomber jacket as she pressed her face into it. Her arms slipped around him as she reveled in how solid he was.

  That was how Daniel and Andi
e found them.

  Kelsey broke the news. “Guess what?”

  Two bright faces looked up expectantly. “Wilder is playing at the Cornbread Festival this weekend, and we can all wear our t-shirts. Then they’re going on tour.”

  JD explained to Andie that he was really sad to be leaving all of them, and would she be okay with Kelsey? Andie screeched like a howler monkey at the thought of all those slumber parties.

  JD’s mouth quirked. “Good to know I’ll be missed.”

  Socking him in the arm playfully, Kelsey felt her own early start to missing him. “You’ll call every day.”

  “Yes, I will.”

  They were almost to the front door, when JD grabbed her hand and held her back. She watched as the kids were greeted with a little too much enthusiasm by the rest of Wilder, then turned to see what JD was going to say. “I want you all to come to the festival, but I’ll get Bethany to go, too, so you don’t have your hands too full and so you can stay and see us.”

  “Sounds like a good plan.”

  Chapter 21

  Saturday night came with food and lights and an array of bands. All four guys showed up in their usual jeans and black tees, but this time with cowboy boots. The kids stuffed their faces with cornbread and spent a good part of the afternoon running around the petting zoo and waiting for pony rides.

  JD disappeared with the band an hour earlier, and it was about time for them to come on stage. Kelsey was holding Allie on her shoulder, and she suspected her daughter was already asleep.

  “Bethany, is Allie out?”

  “Like a light. And Andie here’s getting fussy. Should I take them home?”

  Kelsey nodded. She’d wanted them all to see JD. But anyone who made serious plans past a child’s bedtime was a fool, and she knew it. “Yup, take them.”

  Reaching out, Bethany took a limp Allie from her. She had Daniel and Andie each give Kelsey a kiss before the three of them formed a hand-chain and went off in their matching Wilder shirts.

  Suddenly Kelsey was all alone in a huge crowd. She knew the guys who would be going on stage in a few minutes, but that was it. She found a tent pole to lean against, at that moment very tired. She figured JD was running on pure adrenaline by this point. Like the good Dad he was, he was at the soccer game bright and early this morning. He’d spent the afternoon here with the guys, doing sound checks and rehearsal. When he wasn’t doing that, he had led the kids through the petting zoo and stayed with them for a late dinner. And, of course, the whole week had been crazy for all of them. They had cut the single Brenda had chosen: the makeup sex song. Of course, Brenda re-titled it, and rightly so, in Kelsey’s mind.

  The band that was finishing up was very twangy and spangly and heavy on the fiddle and steel guitar. A good-looking middle-aged man asked her to dance, and she surprised herself by saying ‘yes’. It was, after all, a two-step, and she knew what to expect.

  He was a passable dancer and a passable partner, and Kelsey was flattered to be asked, but grateful when the song ended and the band thanked everyone for coming out.

  Kelsey stepped away, then stilled the second she saw the guys come out into the lights. This was the first time she’d ever seen them on a real stage. This was the real deal, with spotlights and rigging and the whole nine yards. She was in awe.

  That’s how Brenda found her halfway into the first song.

  Brenda’s grin was pure pride. “The boys told me you were the pretty brunette with pigtails. But I remember you now.”

  Kelsey almost chafed at the mention of ‘boys’, but then realized that Brenda had every right to refer to them as ‘boys’. “The shirt probably gives me away.”

  “Not so much.” Brenda shook her head, and pointed out a small handful of black tees with Wilder on them.

  “Wow.”

  “I hear it’s your work on that shirt.”

  Kelsey just nodded as Brenda told her they wanted to use it on the front of the single cover and on more posters and t-shirts, and she was going to get paid for it.

  The two women watched the entire set, Kelsey mostly with her mouth open. She didn’t know if it was because her photos got picked up along with the band, or because the guys were just so good. They got the crowd rocking and yelling and dancing, and buying singles and t-shirts. Whatever Brenda had done was working.

  TJ stopped the set for a moment to breathlessly introduce his ‘brothers’ onstage, and then they played the last song. It was one she hadn’t heard before about love right under your nose. She didn’t notice until the lights went out that Brenda had disappeared, but that made sense, hers was a small time record label, looking to get bigger. Brenda was everything: agent, manager, producer.

  The stage stayed black for a while, and she simply remained where she was. Her legs were tired and her head was tired. The next band didn’t cut it.

  Just as she was straightening up, she saw JD walk down a flight of steps all but hidden around the side of the stage. He’d changed into a green t-shirt, and she couldn’t see his face. Even as he walked down the steps he pulled the cowboy hat a little lower.

  Cowboy hat? She didn’t think she’d ever seen any of them in a cowboy hat. She was on the verge of laughing until he was right beside her.

  “Nice hat.”

  He looked sideways at where she still leaned against the pole. “Our big debut, and all you can say is ‘nice hat’?”

  “Yup.” She rolled her head to the side to see him under the brim. “You guys were awesome. The crowd loved you. Brenda seems to think you’re the next big thing. But the hat—the hat is a shock.”

  He didn’t ask, just took her hand and pulled her out onto the dance floor. “I saw Bethany leaving with the kids just before the set.”

  Kelsey knew her regret came through in her voice. “Yeah, Allie was already asleep.”

  “I figured that, since Bethany was carrying her like a sack of potatoes.”

  He led her once all the way around the floor before she commented. “I’m boggled. First the cowboy hat, then the two-step.” Her eyebrows had to be so high as to have left her head entirely. He was much better than Ken had been, too. But maybe that wasn’t so much a surprise. JD felt like a perfect fit at everything he did.

  “Now, baby, where am I from?”

  “Texas.” She grinned.

  “Any other questions?”

  She laughed until he shut her up by spinning her in about three different directions.

  Chapter 22

  JD was astonished at how much fun Halloween was with a child. He’d pestered Andie no end, making sure her angel wings were perfect. He’d bought her pristine little white shoes that Andie begged Kelsey to glue huge bows onto. And he’d nearly broken down and cried after Andie said she’d chosen to be an angel to be like her Mommy.

  They hopped down the back steps at about 4 p.m. to head over to Kelsey’s. JD was surprised that the sidewalk didn’t look worn where one or the other of them had walked it a thousand times.

  “It’s not even dark yet!” Andie was clearly concerned by this fact, and he wondered if she thought people were going to turn away a beautiful five-year-old in full costume just because it was a tad too bright.

  “We’re going to eat something first. But it will probably still be fairly light when we go. It’s a school night.” He hadn’t felt so strongly since his own school days that there ought to be mandatory movement of the holiday to a weekend.

  They rang the bell, which they never did anymore, and grinned at each other when they heard Allie and Daniel come running.

  The door was thrown open by a small Peter Pan, waving a foam sword. Allie/Tinkerbell clapped, jumping up and down in place, and JD was almost glad he’d missed Andie at that age. Although it was entirely possible that Allie was just nuts and not all kids were jumping beans at that stage.

  Kelsey called them all back. “You’re letting the heat out.” She walked over to the table placing a pile of steaming fettucine alfredo in the middle of a spread t
hat already included salad, a bowl of peas, and a pile of garlic bread.

  JD blinked, he thought maybe they ought to vent the door and let some of the heat out. Kelsey could keep the food steaming just by standing near it. She was in a pink I-Dream-of-Jeannie outfit that showed off a killer figure and an expanse of smooth waist. How was this a woman who’d had two kids? It tumbled out of his mouth before he could take it back.

  She flushed a sweet shade of pink, and shook her head. “Only one. Andy brought me Daniel.” She ruffled the little boy’s hair.

  Okay, how was this a woman who had had a child? But this time he kept it in his mouth. “You look great.” Then he faltered. “I didn’t know I was supposed to come in costume, too.”

  She waved them all over to the table, “You weren’t. Just this afternoon Maggie invited me out to a party tonight, and we wrangled Bethany into babysitting by bribing her with double pay.” Her nose crinkled and he wondered if she was casting a spell. “I didn’t invite you, because I thought you’d want to spend the evening with Andie.”

  She was right, of course. Wilder was leaving the next morning to head out on tour. Brenda had poured huge money into having an old tour bus revamped to get them out there.

  Some band had gotten too big for their britches and bailed on opening a tour of new artists. Brenda decided it was divine intervention that she was sitting on not one but two new acts, the other a female vocalist with a voice like God’s own hurricane. Since neither of them could tour full time together they’d share the tour.

  JD agreed about the divine intervention part. He’d also heard Hailey Watkins sing and he agreed with the hurricane analogy. And he did want to spend the evening with Andie. He just also had a driving urge to follow Kelsey to the party and fend off . . . everyone?

  The kids wolfed down their dinners without a fuss. Five minutes later they were out in light that was only slightly dimmer than full sun, and hitting the neighbors up for candy. He and Kelsey hung back at the sidewalk, letting the kids go ring doorbells and yell ‘trick or treat’.