Never Another You

by Leeann Whitaker

  “Why didn’t you talk to me? What did you think I would do- hate you?”

  “I read your journal Jack. You want a new life; an escape from me.”

  Jack blinked slowly, clenching his jaw. “You have made me fall in love with you twice now Nell. I will never be able to escape from you. I never wanted to.” Nell’s shoulders dropped as her head lowered. “Please, tell me what you want.” Jack moved toward her, feeling his heart throb hard against his ribcage. “Just you Nell, nobody else… what you want?”

  Bit by bit her head rose. She gazed at Jack through her hazy tears. There was only one answer; there always had been.

  Her chest swelled with deep pain. “You Jack. It was always you.”

  Jack burst across the room, firmly laying his hands on her face. Now passion was spilling out of them both, as they shared an aggressive kiss. Hands moved, pressed, and pulled at clothing. Each breath was arduous with a desire suppressed inside for so long. And as Nell’s legs wrapped around Jack’s waist, furniture became invisible. Nothing was going to stand in the way of making up for all those years of their lost love.

  Jack laid Nell gently down on the couch and crawled over her. He pushed his nose against hers and gazed down. Nell scaled her fingertips up his face, to rest her hand on his cheek. They just needed to take each other in. To see, feel, and touch.

  “No more hiding Nell,” Jack said softly. “Not from me, or yourself… promise me.”

  “Promise. I won’t let you go this time Jack.”

  Eighteen Again

  Waking up together was all so wonderful. For three nights, Jack and Nell were as content as they would have been if they had stayed together throughout those lost years. The comfort and ease they had with one another, was that of two souls who should have never been parted. They talked, laughed, and finally felt a sense of who they really were. A belonging.

  It was early, and the ducks on the lake made an awful racket outside the window. The hazy pink morning sun shone through the thin floral curtains, and onto Nell’s face. She creased her closed eyes and turned over, wriggling and squirming to find a comfortable spot on Jack’s chest. She trailed her fingers across his bare skin, pressing her ear against his firm breast. The soothing rhythm of his heart made her grin from ear to ear. She hummed, squeezing his body in delight, causing her lilac satin nightdress to brush over his warm legs. He inhaled a great stirring breath, and squeezed her back.

  “Morning,” he kissed the top of her head.

  “Morning to you.” Nell slid up her head to see Jack’s sleepy eyes and messy bed hair.

  “Aren’t you supposed to be up and getting ready for work?” he asked with a yawn.

  “It’s my day off today.”

  “You’ve only done two shifts,” he frowned.

  “Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays I told you.”

  It was Wednesday. Nell had worked two afternoons at the Durum’s grocery store already, and enjoyed every moment of it. The shop sold a small selection of locally grown produce, milk, and meats from the nearby farms. It provided a postal service, and also over the counter remedies for minor sickness.

  On her first day, Nell picked things up easily. It was a pleasant atmosphere where chit-chat was an essential part of the job. With a smile she met many of the residents of Eardisland, using their ration cards to formally introduce herself first. Mr and Mrs Durum were over the moon with her, and she finally came out of her shell.

  “So Jack.” Her fingers crept up his chest in a teasing way. “What do you want to do today?”

  “Well, I have made a list of jobs that need doing around the place,” he said. “Then tonight, I was thinking about taking you to a dance being held at the Black Sheep.”

  Nell sat up and scowled, “The pub, dancing?”

  “Yeah, why not,” he smiled. “There’s a prize for the winners.”

  “Jack,” she groaned.

  “We’ll beat them hands down. Besides, it’s been an age since I danced with a girl.” He kept his face very serious, knowing what buttons to push.

  Nell bit her cheek as her brow lifted. “How long?” she asked with a hint of the green eyed monster coming through, falling into Jack playful trap.

  “Are we jealous?” he tickled her side.

  She giggled loudly. “Stop… Jack!”

  When he stopped, Nell boisterously straddled his waist. She pinned his arms against the duck feather filled teal pillow, and glared down at him, biting her bottom lip.

  “How many then?”

  “Only a few,” he replied slyly. “There was Mary, Elizabeth, Wendy, and Georgina.” Nell huffed in a sulk, rolling her eyes at him. “Oh, then there was Victoria and…”

  Nell dipped her head with speed and kissed him to stop him saying another name. He mumbled as her lips moved delicately on his, until he gave in and began to kiss her back. Now she had conquered over him, she decided to let him go. She looked down as his lids gradually parted. The glaze over his pupils, showed she had him well under her spell.

  “But my dear Nell, not one of them would I ever dream of using as a partner in a dance contest,” he laughed. “You’re my only Ginger baby.”

  Nell slapped his chest playfully. “Shut up Jack.”

  He grabbed her waist and flipped her over. She chuckled as he seductively swept his hand up her thigh and beneath her nightdress. Immediately she sealed her eyes, relishing his touch.

  “So” Jack slid his fingers beneath her ached back. “Are you going to be my date tonight?”

  “Yes Jack,” she yelled, impatiently pulling his face to hers, but he pulled back and continued to tease.

  “Good.” He hummed, enjoying the way her body flinched as his fingers provoked the curve of her spine. “As for this morning,” he grinned, watching Nell squirm and succumb. “Well.” He kissed her pouting lips. “Let’s work on that.” He inhaled her moan. “Right now.”

  ***

  Nell had washed and pressed Jack’s uniform, as he stood at the kitchen sink having a shave. When he finished, he wrapped the towel around the back of his neck, and fastened the top button on his trousers. Nell was already dressed in a peach coloured chiffon knee-length dress, matching heels, with her hair curled and half pinned back.

  “Gorgeous,” he winked. “Did I not already tell you that?”

  “Yes you did,” she beamed. “We’re going to have to get you some clothes Jack.” Nell lifted one of his socks up to the light. It was really pointless him wearing any socks at all. Toeless they were. “Mrs Durum has a bag of men’s clothes in the back of the shop… I’ll have to ask her.”

  Jack slipped his shirt over his vest, and pulled his braces up over his shoulders. “Who’s clothes?”

  “Her nephews I think.”

  “And her nephew doesn’t wear these clothes anymore?” Jack fastened the buttons up to his collar, threading his tie around his neck.

  “He’s dead I think,” Nell replied casually.

  Jack’s movements stopped completely as he held the edges of his tie. He stared at her with a high brow. He couldn’t believe what had just come out of her mouth. And so nonchalantly as well.

  Nell approached then began to fasten his tie for him as he frowned down at her.

  “What?” she asked. “They’re clean.” She looped and pulled, creating the perfect Windsor knot.

  “I’ll stick with these thank you,” he pushed up her chin delicately. “My uniform not dashing enough for you?”

  “Jack,” she chuckled. “You will always be dashing to me. But you are so picky.” She angled down by his hip, to hand him his jacket and hat from the kitchen table. “So, before I change my mind, let’s skedaddle.”

  Jack quickly put on his jacket, positioned the visor of his hat, and opened up his elbow.

  “Let’s go blow their socks off Ginger.”

  ***

  It was a mild still night as they walked arm in arm upon the cobbles to arrive outside the Black Sheep Inn. It was a Tudor building, the style
in keeping with the rest of the village. But this was far from beyond a small public house. It was big, with enough room to entertain most of the locals. And it sounded as though at least fifty percent of them were inside for the dancing contest.

  Jack opened the glass panel door to let Nell go through first. She was rather apprehensive with it being her first visit to the place. Jack stood by her side as she clutched her bag before her waist. It was extremely busy, smoky, and very humid. And swing music began to sound from a set of double doors that hand in hand couples were going through.

  Jack clapped and rubbed his hands together with a smile. He was excited and used to social events such as this. Being a soldier, he spent his rec time with his comrades in the nearest bar or on the barracks he was based: drinking, joking, and having a good time. Nell however, wasn’t. The last time she went out socialising with Teresa at the dance hall, she was punished by Alistair’s hand. Although she had fun, that was her last night out. Alistair liked to know her whereabouts and who she was with. And he would always find out if she had done something he disapproved of. It had been such a long time since she let down her hair, she felt a little awkward.

  “Nell,” Jack looked at her with concern. “Relax.”

  She forced out a smile. “I am.”

  “Right, I’ll get drinks then.”

  Jack squeezed through to the crowded bar as Nell stood back waiting. She watched as he leaned over, and chatted with the landlord. As she turned back to the doors the dancers were going through, she was hit by a cloud of cigarette smoke. She waved her hand in front of her face and coughed.

  “Nell,” Mrs Durum squeaked. “Here with your fella?” She looked across at Jack approaching, holding two half-glasses of stout.

  Nell smiled. She didn’t like being engulfed by smoke, but it was nice to see a friendly face.

  “Yes,” Nell replied, taking her drink from Jack.

  “Mrs Durum… you here for the dancing?” Jack swung his hips side to side.

  She laughed. “Does that chunk,” she nodded to Mr Durum sat on a stool by the bar. “Look like he’s a dancer?” she griped. “No, my cousin and his wife are… hey, Jimmy,” she yelled and waved over Nell’s shoulder.

  A couple, a few years older than Jack and Nell came over. Jimmy grinned. He was quite short and stocky, with red hair poking out from beneath his flat-cap. Clearly he was a farmer. And his wife was of the same height, with dark blonde hair, wearing a pink dress.

  “Jimmy, Elsa, this is the Nell I was telling you about… with her?” Mrs Durum asked, unsure what the relationship between Jack and Nell was.

  “Partner… Jack.” Jack held out his hand to greet.

  “Jack, nice to meet you.” Jimmy shook hands with Jack, with a puzzled expression on his face.

  It was bound to happen eventually. It was frowned upon, living together out of wedlock. If the village found out that Nell was actually married, had run away, and now had another man under her roof. It would be pitchforks at dawn in Eardisland.

  “You here for the competition then?” Jimmy tilted his head to look at Jack’s stripes on his jacket. “Sergeant Jack.”

  “Yeah… we’ve had a bit of experience,” Jack gloated as Nell’s eyes looped.

  “Well, good to meet you Jack, Nell,” Jimmy said. “Elsa and I, have to go and warm-up.”

  Nell glared up at Jack. Warming up, intended they meant business.

  “Mrs Durum, do Jimmy and Elsa dance a lot then?” Jack asked, sizing up the competition as they walked away.

  She laughed. “They’re only the county’s swing champions.”

  Promptly, Jack yanked Nell’s arm toward the doors, nearly spilling her drink all over her dress.

  “Jack,” she snapped, as he took hold of the handle. “What on earth are you doing?”

  “I’m not going to lose this,” he said. “We need to warm-up.”

  Nell laughed. “Are you crazy? This is supposed to be fun… a date.”

  He opened the doors so the music drowned out the sound from the bar area. Nell looked inside to see around fifteen couples, dancing on a flagged floor. The room was spacious with seats placed around each wall where spectators sat. And before a large speaker, stood a long judging table. It was a village hall connected to the pub, and it all looked so professional.

  Nell panicked. She didn’t think for one second this would be some big fancy affair. Some of those dancers could really move, and she had not danced that way for such a long time.

  “I’m not doing this Jack,” she fretted. “I can’t.”

  “Come on Nell. Look, we’ll have fun, and who knows what will happen.” He took her hand in his. “I want to dance with you, that’s all.”

  “Oh Jack,” she said in a long breath.

  “Do you want me to beg?”

  Nell giggled. It was tempting to make him pay for putting her through this. But he had such a sweet impatient look in his eyes, there was no way she could refuse.

  “Fine.”

  Jack and Nell registered to enter, and had numbers six and seven pinned to their backs. They listened carefully to the only male adjudicator (who was also the village GP, Doctor Smith) read out the rules. The first song was a warm-up, then that would be followed by the first round. After seven couples were selected from that, the second song would be danced to. Altogether, there would be three rounds to compete in.

  All the seats quickly filled with spectators and drinkers from the pub. The lights then dimmed a little as the first song began to play. It was an energetic number with an appealing beat.

  Jack faced Nell, and started to bob and kick out his feet, while clicking his fingers. He was trying to coax a nervous Nell to start moving, but she just couldn’t do it. He grabbed her by the waist and brought her hand to his chest, while waltzing side to side.

  He bowed to her ear. “Nell, I know you’re in there somewhere,” he whispered. “The fun, shake-em and move-em girl I used to know, would not let some bighead like Jimmy over there, win this without a fight.” He swung her around so she could see the opposition.

  Nell looked across the dancefloor at Jimmy and Elsa. They were good. Real good. But Jack was right. Jimmy’s eyes were so self-assured, and had the nerve to offer a winning wink to Nell before the competition had even begun.

  Jack veered Nell around again. “So, are we eighteen again?”

  Nell smiled, took a huge breath, and pushed out from Jack. He held onto her hands as she kicked out her heels, stepped like a pro, and twirled under his arm so her skirt flew out like the ripples on a lake. She laughed, and Jack howled out in glee as the warm-up came to an ill-timed end.

  Both Nell and Jack took over that floor. They out-danced all the contenders, and were now facing Elsa and Jimmy in the final. They weaved and spun. Flexed and looped. And even Jimmy’s faithful fans were beginning to side with his rivals.

  Nell blocked out everything. As did Jack. They were eighteen all over again, and didn’t care who was watching because they were having a ball. The crowd roared and clapped as Jack lifted Nell up and coiled her around his back, to end the song with her up in his arms. They panted, gazing into each other’s eyes, on cloud nine.

  Doctor Smith huddled with his fellow judges as Jack let Nell’s feet drop to the floor. Jimmy glanced across. He was clearly annoyed, as he and Elsa were now bickering. Nell looked up at Jack and laughed. Neither really cared about winning. The whole evening had been such fun. A blast from the past they both needed.

  Doctor Smith made his way into the middle of the room, holding a microphone.

  “After great deliberation,” his voice echoed in the silence. “This year’s swing winners are numbers,” he paused. “Six and seven,” he bellowed.

  Jack grabbed hold of Nell excitedly, and kissed her to the delight of the crowd. Doctor Smith approached and handed both Jack and Nell, a green first place rosette. Elsa and Jimmy then plodded over. Elsa gave Nell a hug as Jimmy shook Jack’s hand.

  “Well, I guess it’s
good to have some competition in this village at last,” Jimmy grumbled. “It will make us work harder for next year.” He pulled on Elsa’s arm, and they walked away in defeat.

  “See you then,” Jack called.

  After receiving their prize, a basket filled with a variety of jams and breads. Jack and Nell strolled back to the cottage under the clear starry sky. As they walked by a bench beneath a dim streetlamp, Jack began to hum, placing the basket on the grass.

  “This is a lovely way, to spend an evening,” Jack bellowed out a Frank Sinatra number.

  “Shush Jack! You’ll wake the whole village up.”

  “And let them wake,” he said. “I haven’t finished dancing with my girl.” He kissed Nell’s lips and drew her body into his.

  He continued to serenade Nell, turning the volume down a notch. “Can’t think of anything, I’d rather do,” he sang in her ear as they slow danced.

  Nell melted at the sound of his voice as she laid her cheek on his chest. She closed her eyes and listened to every sweet word he sang to her. Everything felt so right. But she knew deep down she couldn’t escape her past this way forever. She was still married- for now. What would people think of her? Not two minutes after she left the marital home, she’s out gallivanting with another.

  “Jack,” she peered up into his eyes. “What will we do?”

  “For now Nell, we dance.”

  The Dark Returns

  The blue moon beams hovered above Nell as she lay fast asleep in Jack’s arms. Jack slept deeply, with one hand on her hair, and the other on the curve of her hip. Suddenly, a thunderous smash occurred downstairs that shook the entire cottage, but woke Nell only. Although she could barely open her heavy eyelids, and was still drifting in and out of sleep, she managed to lift her head a little. Squinting her eyes, she listened for a while, wondering if it was just a dream. But another noise immediately fired the adrenalin through her body. It was a clear thud, along with the sound of crunching glass. She pushed on Jack’s chest to wake him, but he groaned and twitched only. So she pushed again, even harder.