Fireflies From Heaven

by Lauren, Rebecca

From the look on his face, he’d seen her and wasn’t thrilled about something. “She’s around here somewhere. Last I saw her she was with some dude dressed like a horror movie victim.”

  Since Cora was wearing an angel’s costume, I figured they’d make an unusually striking couple and easy to spot, but as I glanced around the clubhouse, that the Fosters had rented, I didn’t see Cora or the ghastly guy that Jase described.

  “So is that guy her boyfriend?” Jase asked casually, taking a sip of his drink.

  “Cora doesn’t have a boyfriend.”

  That caught his attention. “Hmm. She’s kind of hard to read. I’m not sure if she’s interested in me or not.”

  “She’s interested, but not in a being another of your one night stands.”

  Surprisingly, I think I might have hurt his feelings. He looked offended. “Is that what she told you?”

  “No, but I bet that’s why she’s giving you hot and cold signs.”

  “You could be right.” Jase looked down at me thoughtfully, and it seemed like he wanted to talk more about Cora so I was surprised when he changed the subject. “Listen, Ellie. Reed is really into you,” he told me with uncharacteristic seriousness. He also used Reed’s first name, something he rarely did, so I knew that whatever Jase was going to tell me was important. “Don’t let any of this shit,” he gestured around the room before he ended with, “fuck it up. Just don’t let this shit fuck it up. Pardon my language.”

  I had no clue what he meant.

  His gaze leveled at someone behind me, and I glanced back to see Amber, dressed as Greek Goddess. She wore a serene smile on her beautiful face that somehow made me uneasy.

  “Jase, do you mind if I speak with Ellie a moment?” Amber asked politely.

  He hesitated, and I thought Jase might say that he did mind but after a moment he said, “Sure.” Jase’s gaze never left mine. “Remember what I said.” Then he turned and walked away, leaving me to wonder what exactly he meant. I didn’t have long to wait before the shit that Jase referred to was unveiled.

  “I like your costume,” I told Amber. She didn’t say anything. “Do you mind if we go outside?”

  I didn’t really want to take a walk with Amber, but I wasn’t going to refuse to talk to her either, so I followed her out toward deserted the pool area, where we sat at table beside the kiddie pool. My stomach was sick from the nervous energy knotting inside of it.

  “Is something wrong?” I asked, unable to contain my curiosity any longer.

  “You and Reed are what’s wrong,” Amber stated calmly as if we were discussing the weather.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Reed doesn’t belong with you,” she continued, almost desperately. “I can see how much you care for him and I don’t mean to hurt you, but he’s mine. He always has been.”

  I felt her pain and the intensity of it ripped at my resolve. “I’m sorry, Amber. I really am.”

  “I don’t want your apology. Please,” she begged, her hand reaching out to cover mine. “I’ve been in love with Reed Bentley since I was five-years-old. I will always love him, and despite what’s going on with the two of you, Reed will always love me too.” Tears filled Amber’s eyes, and I couldn’t help but sympathize with her.

  “Amber, I know you love him,” I said gently. “He loves you too, but maybe the two of you aren’t in love anymore.”

  Tears slid down Amber’s cheeks, and she let out a cry that tore at my heart. “You don’t understand. We’ve always been in love, even when we weren’t together. Someday Reed will come back to me. If he has to let things with you die a natural death, then I’ll wait for him,” she announced in a tone of voice that left no doubt that she believed she’d end up with Reed.

  I didn’t know what to say.

  “Or,” Amber said slowly. “You can give us our chance to finally be happy.”

  “I can’t do that,” I told her.

  “You mean you won’t,” Amber replied bitterly. “I’m not asking you to stay away forever, just give Reed and I a chance. Please, that’s all I’m asking.”

  “What do you want?” I asked slowly, dread filling me.

  “Tell him you need some space. Suggest that the two of you see other people. Just for a little while. If Reed truly loves you, then he’ll come back to you. If he chooses me, would you really have wanted to keep him?”

  My heart was pounding. “I don’t know.”

  “You’ll do the right thing, Ellie. I know you will.” Amber got up and left me alone to weather the hurricane of emotions she’d created.

  “Where’ve you been?” Reed asked, finding me outside later. It was plain to see from his expression that he’d been worried about me. “I’ve looked everywhere and I’ve called you a dozen times.”

  “I’m sorry.” Glancing down, I said, “I left my phone at your place.”

  A beam of moonlight must have caught my face because he suddenly froze. “Have you been crying?”

  “I felt like I needed for some fresh air,” I told him.

  His expression was a mixture of relief, concern, and, because Reed knew me so well, doubt. “Are you feeling better now?” he asked, his eyes sliding over me.

  “My stomach is still nauseated. I should probably go home.”

  “Okay.” He sighed, pulling out his cell. “Let me call your dad first, he’s been looking for you too.” He’d already dialed the number and had the phone to his ear. Dad had to have answered on the first ring because Reed started talking to him, telling him that I was outside and, yes, I was fine.

  Reed took me home, but once we were in his bedroom I realized that he had no intention of making love to me, and I couldn’t blame him for not wanting to have sex with someone who he thought might throw up on him.

  “Do you want me to get you something?”

  “I feel better now,” I said dropping to my knees in front of him. He was really sexy dressed like Clyde. For the second time tonight, I undid he pants and pushed them down.

  “Ellie.” He stopped me, his eyes narrowed as if trying to understand what was going on. “I thought you were sick.”

  “I need you,” I said almost desperately. “Please.”

  He seemed unsure, but he didn’t stop me when I went to down on him and I focused on trying to read his body’s reaction to my ministrations, wanting to give him incredible pleasure.

  Just before he came, he pulled me up but instead of lowering me onto the bed he turned around and sank into the bed, pulling me on top of him. He undid his pants and freed himself while I pushed up my dress and pulled down my panties. I straddled him, feeling awkward and unsure of what to do.

  “Ride me.”

  The words were thick and rich with desire, and they kindled a fire deep within my belly. Shifting, I settled over his erection and lowered myself on him slowly until I finally lost control and sank all the way down, burying him deep inside of me.

  Reed groaned.

  Bracing myself with my hands resting on his solid chest, I moved.

  A low sound tore from Reed, and I saw that this jaw was clenched tightly shut and he’d reached backwards and was holding on the to slats in his headboard. He was fighting for control, struggling to remain still while I set the tempo for our lovemaking.

  I moved again, and began a steady rhythm that had me hot and moaning his name. And then he let go of the headboard and cupped my breasts, flicking my nipples with his thumbs. I burst, coming so hard that my body shook while waves of pleasure rolled through me.

  I collapsed onto his chest and we undressed, and made love again, this time tender and slow. Afterwards we held each other, and I tried to memorize every detail of this night so that I could replay it in my mind as often as I wished.

  “You weren’t sick tonight.” Reed pressed a kiss to my temple.

  It didn’t reply.

  “What’s going on? You disappeared and you’d been crying. Tell me what happened, and I’ll fix it.”

  “You can’t,” I whispere
d.

  “I can’t if you won’t talk to me,” he replied, watching me with a troubled look in his eyes.

  “I’m tired, Reed.” It was the truth. I was exhausted. “Can’t you just hold me and we’ll talk about it later.”

  “Yeah, I can do that.” Reluctantly, he let the subject drop.

  I loved the feel of his body against mine and craved the feeling of being safe and cherished. Once he thought that I’d fallen asleep, Reed slept. I stayed awake watching him sleep, memorizing his face, studying each breath he took and praying, selfishly, that Reed would choose me over Amber. I didn’t want to give him the chance to leave me, but it was the right thing to do.

  Putting off the inevitable, I stayed by his side most of the night, but early the next morning, while Reed still slept, I quietly crept from the house. I told myself I’d break up with him in the afternoon, but as the day wore on I wasn’t sure that I could go through with it. I declined all his calls and left his texts unanswered.

  Chapter 19

  Three days later Reed confronted me.

  When I went to answer the door, I figured Cora had misplaced her key again but to my surprise Reed was standing in my doorway wearing dark slacks, a white dress shirt and tie. Just looking at him made my heart ache.

  For a moment I considered forgetting about Amber, and begging Reed’s forgiveness, but the nagging thought of her being right haunted me. What she’d said made sense. If Reed loved me, then we’d still end up together. I guess I was afraid to test our new relationship and afraid to find out that he loved her more.

  “Did you lose your phone?” he asked in a deceptively casual tone. I knew Reed well enough to know that he was angry with me.

  Opening the door wider, I stepped aside. “Come in, Reed.”

  His deep, ocean blue eyes fastened on mine and I felt my will began to crumble beneath the intensity of his gaze. I looked away quickly. Reed stepped inside, turning to me the moment I closed the door, but he didn’t say anything just waited for me to explain.

  “I think we need some time away from each other.” Saying the words felt wrong, and I wanted to take them back.

  He took a deep breath, nodded. “Okay.”

  “If we spend some time apart and see other people, we’d know for sure if what we have is real,” I explained, my voice shaking and heart pounding. Tensing, I looked up at him, fully expecting his anger but instead he was strangely silent.

  Finally, he nodded again. A moment later he reached for me, but I stepped away, knowing I wouldn’t be able to think clearly if he touched me. Reed watched my reaction with surprise, and then I saw a shadow of pain darken his eyes.

  “Ellie,” he said gently. “If I’ve done something to upset you, I’m sorry.”

  “You haven’t done anything, Reed,” I assured him.

  He didn’t look convinced. “Maybe it was too soon to tell you I loved you. If we’re moving too fast, I don’t mind slowing things down.”

  I shook my head, unable to hear any more.

  “I know I don’t have a job now, but I went to the bank this afternoon to get approved for a business loan. I’m going to start doing some carpentry work until I finish my degree. It’s not going to be much at first, but I’ll be able to make a living.”

  “It’s not that,” I cried, feeling guilty. “You didn’t move too fast, and you were injured serving our country, I didn’t expect you to get out of the hospital and go to work the next day.”

  “Alright,” he replied slowly. “Tell me what I’ve done.”

  “Stop it Reed! You didn’t do anything. That’s not what this is about.”

  “Then what is it about?” he snarled. “Because I’ve been thinking about it for three days, and I can’t figure out what the hell I did to deserve you running out on me and avoiding me for the last few days.”

  I felt every word as if it was a knife that sliced into me, and the pain I’d caused him overwhelmed me. “I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t want to hurt you, Reed. I do love you, but I think we need to take a break. If we really love each other, we’ll get back together,” I explained, needing to believe what I was saying. I prayed that I was doing the right thing, but I wasn’t sure.

  Reed stared at me in disbelief. “I don’t understand.”

  “You need time to work out your feelings for Amber,” I blurted out, frustrated and heartbroken.

  He blinked, stared at me. “I don’t have any feelings for Amber to work out.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Yeah, I do know that, Ellie. I already know what I want--you. If you’re not sure, I’ll wait for you while you figure things out.”

  Every word was like a blow to my already battered heart. “It’s not me that needs to figure things out.” I could see that he didn’t believe me.

  He closed the distance between us and gathered me into his arms before I realized what he meant to do. I leaned into him, wanting to wrap my arms around him and never let go. But I did let go, and I stepped back. Reed gently cradled my face in his hands and looked into my eyes when he spoke the words that shattered my heart. “If you need to see other people to to be sure about us, go ahead and do what you need to do. I’ll be here when you’re done, and I’ll still love you as much as I do now.”

  I could not believe what he was saying. Tears dripped steadily down my cheeks. Maybe Reed really did love me. If he did, then what harm could come from him seeing Amber for a few weeks?

  “It’ll only be for a few weeks. You can go out with Amber and if you still want to be with me, I’ll be waiting for you.”

  He scowled. “I can’t believe you’re saying this.” His voice was tight with anger, and his jaw was clenched shut, the vein in his temple throbbing.

  “I can’t be with you until I know for sure you’re not in love with Amber!”

  “I’m in love with you, Ellie. You.”

  Each of his words cut a piece of my heart, and his eyes implored me to believe him. “I love you—“

  “No,” he interrupted, his eyes flashing with pain. Taking a deep breath he said calmly, “You don’t love me, and you don’t have to make up this crazy story.”

  “Reed, that’s not it. I don’t want us to break up for good. Please, if you’ll just listen.”

  “Listen like you listened to me when I said I didn’t love Amber? No, Ellie. This is over. You don’t have to lie anymore.” He turned away and strode towards the door without looking back.

  “Reed!” I cried, but he closed the door behind him.

  If I’d done the right thing, then why did it feel as if I’d made the worst mistake of my life? I didn’t stop to think, instead I followed my heart and ran after Reed.

  Running out the door, I tripped on something and fell, tumbling down the first landing of the stairs and banging my head against the railing. I cried out and felt a sharp pain shooting inside my left wrist.

  I glanced around, wondering what had just happened, and my eyes hit on Tyler’s skateboard. Reed wasn’t anywhere in sight. He’d already gone.

  “You’re lucky Miss McAllister,” Dr. Mitchell informed me. “You don’t have a concussion, which was my biggest concern. You may have a headache for a couple of days.”

  I tried to smile, but it hurt. “That’s good.”

  “You’re wrist isn’t broken, but you do have a bad sprain. You’ll have to wear a brace for a couple of weeks. The cuts and bruises are minor and should heal soon. I can give you something for the pain,” he said giving me a cursory look before turning his attention back to the chart in front of him.

  “I won’t need it. Thank you,” I told him.

  The nurse came to my side to check my vitals. “Two women and a boy are in the waiting room wanting to see you, Jennifer and Tyler Sherman and Isabelle Bentley.”

  “Thanks. Can I see them now?”

  “Sure, sweetie,” the nurse said with a smile.

  A few minutes later, Isabelle swept into the stark white room instantly lighting it
up with her vibrant beauty. Jennifer and Tyler Sherman followed her, wearing matching expressions of apprehension.

  “The doctor said I’m fine. They’re threatening to toss me out of this emergency clinic since I don’t have a real emergency,” I said trying to lighten the mood. “All I have is a sprained wrist and a few bruises.”

  Jennifer and Tyler began apologizing at the same time, and I felt awful for both of them, especially Tyler. I knew he blamed himself because I tripped on his skateboard.

  “It was an accident,” I assured them, squeezing Tyler’s hand and smiling at Jennifer. “I wasn’t watching where I was going, and I’ll feel terrible if I know that you’re blaming yourself for my clumsiness.”

  That seemed to comfort them and we talked a little while longer before Jennifer said, “If there’s anything we can do for you let us know.”

  I told her I would, knowing I probably wouldn’t and then I was left alone with Isabelle, who’d been uncharacteristically quiet while I talked with Jennifer and Tyler.

  “Are you in pain?” she asked, studying me.

  “A little. They gave me some meds so I’m actually feeling pretty good now,” I said lightly.

  The smooth skin between her brows was puckered into a frown. “What happened?”

  “I fell down the stairs. You didn’t call anyone, did you?”

  “No one.” She didn’t look happy about it.

  “Dad would only worry. Cora’s in Corpus Christi with the orchestra and there isn’t any reason to upset her.”

  “You don’t want anyone worrying about you. Got it,” Isabelle said with an odd look in her eyes. “What about Reed? You didn’t mention him.”

  I wanted to cry. It had been an emotional day, and the effects of my break up with Reed were too strong to be dulled by pain meds.

  “Ellie?” Isabelle whispered, alarmed.

  “Reed and broke up.”

  “Oh God. I’m so sorry.” She moved to my side and took my hand. “ Reed is so in love with you, and you both looked happy together. I don’t understand.”

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “I broke up with him so that he could go out with Amber.”