In Dreams Forgotten

by Tracie Peterson

  Cora was the very image of Judith. No wonder the older woman had murmured that name.

  Judith’s knees began to shake, and she clung to Caleb for support. What did this mean?

  Caleb put his arm around her. He seemed to understand that she was close to collapse.

  “I know this must come as a shock to you, dear Judith, but there is simply no other way to explain,” Mrs. Whitley said.

  Judith shook her head. “I . . . don’t understand.”

  The old woman’s expression softened in a way it hadn’t since they’d arrived. She stepped forward and reached out to touch Judith’s cheek. “Edith wasn’t your aunt, my dear. She was your mother.”

  CHAPTER

  9

  Thank you for letting me borrow this ball gown.” Kenzie fingered the dark blue beaded silk with tulle overlay. “It’s stunning.”

  Camri smiled. “It is pretty, and you’re lucky it arrived last week. It’s one of only two such gowns I own. Mother promised to send all of my things, but apparently the other ball gown will arrive in a later shipment.”

  “I have several gowns back home. My life with Arthur seemed to demand such finery. I never thought to need them again. Mother is sending my summer clothes, but I doubt she’ll think to send the gowns as well. Frankly, if she did, I’d probably sell them.”

  “I wouldn’t. You might need them. After all, Micah is quite social.”

  Kenzie looked at her sharply. “I’m only doing this once. I don’t plan to ever go to another event with him.”

  “But why not? Micah’s very nice, and it’s obvious he’s taken an interest in you.”

  “I don’t want him to take an interest.” Kenzie walked over to Camri’s window and looked out on the sunny day.

  “I don’t understand why not.” Camri knew her friend was still nursing a broken heart, but perhaps it was time to let the good doctor help her heal. “Micah is a good man, Kenzie.”

  “So was Arthur. Or at least I thought him to be.”

  “But just because one man is less than admirable doesn’t mean all men are a waste of your affections. Patrick and Caleb are good examples. They have their flaws, but they are good and trustworthy.”

  Kenzie turned and fixed Camri with a frown. “You hardly know what kind of man Patrick is. You’ve only known him a few months.”

  “With some people you can just tell what kind of person they are. Like you. When I first met you, I knew I would like you, that you would be the kind of woman I could trust to be my friend. I’ve always been a good judge of character.”

  “Well, apparently I’m not.”

  “Then maybe you should trust the impressions of those who are.”

  Kenzie shook her head. “Honestly, Camri, I’d rather not discuss this. If I could get out of going to the dance, I would.”

  “Then why did you agree to go?”

  “I don’t know. I suppose because of pride or a sense of obligation. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

  “Isn’t it possible that part of you really wants to go with Micah to the dance? It has been a long time since you allowed yourself to enjoy an evening out. Why don’t you look at this as a new start?”

  The look on her friend’s face was enough to reveal her heart. Kenzie was still unable to move past the heartbreak she’d suffered. Camri tried to choose her words carefully.

  “I don’t wish to offend, but I know you value honesty.”

  “I do,” Kenzie replied. “So just say what you will.” She came back to the bed, where Camri had laid out the gown.

  “It seems to me that you never really had a chance to say good-bye to Arthur. That makes it difficult to put him behind you. Maybe you could write him a letter and tell him how much he hurt you—how his deception and betrayal crushed your spirit. Perhaps that would even cause him to reconsider his actions.”

  “To what point?”

  Camri shrugged. “Maybe he’d realize that you still care and make things right.”

  Kenzie shook her head. “I don’t know that I want that, Camri. I knew when Arthur first started trying to win me over that it was a mistake. I don’t fit in his world, and his family was only too glad to point that out to me. I wish I’d listened to my heart and kept up my guard.”

  “But love can overcome all. If you two are really meant for each other, then maybe you should give him another chance.”

  “Camri, he made it very clear that he wasn’t interested in a life with me. Why in the world would I put myself in that position again?”

  “Well, if you still love him—”

  “I think I’ll always care for him.”

  “But that isn’t the same as being in love with him.”

  Camri could see by Kenzie’s expression that the comment had taken her by surprise. Camri waited, wondering if her friend would realize the impact of her statement.

  “But I must still be in love,” Kenzie said, shaking her head. She sat down on the corner of the bed. “I pledged that I would love him forever.”

  “His betrayal was crushing. Perhaps it killed the love you felt for him, but your pain won’t allow you to see it. I don’t claim to be an authority on the matter, as you well know, but perhaps you aren’t in love with Arthur and just haven’t yet figured out what to feel toward him.”

  Kenzie stared past Camri—no doubt seeing nothing. “But how could I not love him?”

  “Things happen to change how we feel about people. Love is not a guaranteed emotion. The love shared between a man and woman requires constant work—nurturing. If not, it dies.”

  “Love can die? I suppose I never thought of that being possible.”

  “Well, like I said, I’m no expert, so perhaps I’m all wrong, but it seems to me that just as hate can die, love too can cease to exist. Sometimes we cling to what we know rather than accept the changes that frighten us. Perhaps if you can find a way to accept what happened, then you could learn to love again. Maybe give your heart to Micah. Or if not him, someone else.”

  “But Arthur still has my heart. Maybe it’s not the love I thought we shared, but he ripped my heart from me when he betrayed me.”

  “Then maybe it’s time you reclaimed your heart so it can heal. Write to him, Kenzie. Tell him the truth. Tell him every painful thought and feeling that he caused. Tell him you’re taking back your heart—your life. Don’t let Arthur Morgan continue to dictate your feelings. He may have ruined that day, but don’t let him have the rest of your life.”

  Kenzie squared her shoulders and looked up. “You may be right, Camri. I would never have considered it before, but there is something satisfying in imagining him reading such a letter.” She got to her feet. “I’ll go tend to it right now.”

  “There’s plenty of stationery in the small sitting room desk.”

  “Yes, I remember.” Kenzie headed to the door. “Thank you.”

  “I’ll have Liling and Mrs. Wong steam out the wrinkles in this dress and bring it to your room.” Camri smiled despite the seriousness of the previous moments. “I think you’re going to be surprised at how much you’ll enjoy yourself this evening—once you have this letter behind you.”

  Ann Whitley could see that her granddaughter was about to faint. “Young man, you should probably help Judith to a chair.”

  Mr. Coulter had no sooner nodded than Judith’s knees gave way. “I’ve got you. Don’t worry.” He lifted her easily and carried her to a chair. He whispered something in her ear, then unpinned her hat and used it to fan her face.

  After ringing for Ramsay, Ann came to Judith’s side. “I am sorry, child. There was no easy way to tell you.”

  Judith looked up at her, shaking her head. “How can any of this be true?”

  “Mr. Coulter, would you bring that chair closer?” Ann motioned to an overstuffed chintz chair by the fireplace.

  “Of course.” He put aside Judith’s hat, then quickly did Ann’s bidding and positioned the chair beside Judith’s.

  Ann took a seat and reache
d out to pat her granddaughter’s hand. Ramsay appeared with tea. “Quickly, Ramsay, bring Judith a cup of tea. She’s unwell.”

  Ramsay had been with Ann for over forty years, having come to the house as a footman. He was younger than Ann by a decade but had proven himself worthy of her trust. He brought Judith’s tea. “Would you care for sugar or lemon?”

  Judith shook her head and took the saucer and cup with shaky hands. Without a word, she sipped the contents. Ann waited until a little color returned to her face. Meanwhile, Ramsay served her and Mr. Coulter their tea, then offered them a variety of tea cakes, sandwiches, and cookies. Ann chose several for herself, and Mr. Coulter did likewise. He offered some of his own to Judith, but she shook her head.

  “Ramsay, prepare a plate with an assortment for Judith,” Ann said.

  The butler did as instructed and deposited a selection of refreshments on the side table by Judith. Once they were served, Ramsay looked to Ann. She gave a nod, and he quickly exited the room, pulling the pocket doors closed behind him.

  “Are you feeling better, my dear?” she asked.

  Judith seemed to rally. “Yes, I’m fine. I’m sorry for behaving as I did. I’ve never fainted before.”

  Ann smiled. “You were quite entitled. Do have something to eat, however. It will make you feel better.”

  Judith looked at the plate of tea cakes and then back to Ann. “Maybe in a minute.”

  “Of course. Take your time. Meanwhile, I’ll try to explain your past to you.”

  “Please do. I . . .” Judith fell silent, shaking her head.

  Ann took a deep breath and began. “I have—or rather had—two sons. Nelson and William. Nelson was my firstborn and fell in love with a beautiful young woman named Edith Morley. Edith had a twin sister named Lila. They were identical in every way but personality. Where Edith was docile and well-behaved, Lila was headstrong and wild.”

  She paused to drink her tea and let Judith absorb the story so far. Then she continued. “Nelson and Edith announced their engagement, and Lila was unhappy about it. She always seemed to need to outdo Edith. Perhaps it was because Edith was the firstborn, who can say. After the engagement was announced, however, Lila became even more difficult for her parents to handle. As Edith’s wedding approached, Lila announced she had fallen in love with a cowboy named Homer Gladstone. She wanted to have a double wedding with her sister. Of course, to a well-to-do family like the Morleys, Homer was an unacceptable choice for their daughter. They forbid further involvement, but Lila refused to listen. She ran away with the young man and married him. Two weeks later, Edith and Nelson were married in an elaborate wedding. Lila’s absence was explained as illness, and no one in society knew what she’d done until much later.”

  Judith remained silent, nibbling a cookie. Ann knew there would be time in the days to come to go into more detail, but for now it seemed important to give her granddaughter a brief understanding of all that had happened, and why.

  “Nelson and Edith went to Europe on their wedding trip. They were gone for three months, and during that time, Lila and Homer were found and brought to the Morley estate. Lila’s father—your grandfather—declared he would have the marriage annulled. However, Lila announced that she was with child, and so the marriage would stand. It was decided to make the best of the situation, so Lila’s father bought them a small ranch east of Oakland, and there they set up housekeeping.

  “When Nelson and Edith returned from abroad, they were established here, as my husband and I desired. They were given the second story of the west wing and were happily settled. Edith learned that she too would have a child, and we were all delighted. Everything seemed to be going fine until the time came for Lila to have her baby.”

  Judith put the cookie aside. “My mother . . . my . . . she had a baby?”

  “Yes, but the baby died, and Lila nearly lost her life. When she finally did recover, the doctor said she would never be able to have children of her own. She was devastated.”

  “How awful,” Judith murmured.

  “It was indeed. She was two months recovering from the ordeal—at least physically. By the time she was up and around, Edith had given birth to twin daughters, Cora and Judith.”

  “Me?” Judith asked. Her expression full of disbelief. “Cora wasn’t just my sister? We were twins?”

  “Yes. It was such a joyous occasion. Nelson was prouder than any papa could ever be. Edith apologized for not giving him sons, but he told her that he was thrilled with his daughters and that sons could come later. Sadly, two boys were later born, but neither survived.”

  “I can hardly believe that I had a sister and brothers.” Judith looked at Mr. Coulter. “I never imagined all of this.”

  “Mrs. Whitley,” Mr. Coulter interjected, “which twin was born first, Cora or Judith?”

  “Judith. However, the girls appeared to be identical, and as you can see from the painting—that proved to be true.”

  “So what happened?” Judith asked, shaking her head. “Why did my mother . . .” She again seemed unable to speak the question and lowered her gaze to the floor.

  “Why did Lila take you?”

  Judith’s face lifted. “Yes.”

  “Her grief drove her, of that we all agreed. A week after you were born, she and Homer came to the house on the pretense of congratulating Edith and Nelson. We invited them to stay with us while they were in San Francisco, since Lila and Edith’s parents were out of town.

  “They were given a guest room in the west wing, at Edith’s insistence. She loved her sister dearly. They had always been very close, at least from Edith’s perspective. Edith was instrumental in your grandparents accepting and helping Lila after she had shamed and disobeyed them with her marriage. We had no way of knowing that Lila and Homer had come planning to take you.”

  “But maybe that wasn’t their plan originally,” Judith said. “Maybe it just happened, and once it did, they knew there was no going back.”

  “No, I’m afraid they knew very well what they were doing. You see, unknown to any of us, Homer had sold the ranch. They had money enough to live on for some time. Not only that, but Lila took some money from the house. Nelson kept a large sum in his desk. Homer had seen it and told Lila about it, and before they slipped away with you, she took the money, as well.”

  “That’s what she was talking about in the letter.” Judith turned to Mr. Coulter. “She said she’d hoped to repay the money.” He nodded and she looked back at Ann. Understanding was beginning to finally dawn. “This explains everything in the letter.”

  “I’m afraid it does. Lila and Homer had planned well in advance to take you. We believe it was Lila’s plan, however. Homer was devoted to her and would have done anything for her—and did. The very next morning—Sunday—Lila went to speak to Edith and tell her good-bye. The rest of us were attending church. Even Nelson had come with us. Edith was still confined to bed, but with the servants there, and knowing her sister would be with her, we thought nothing of leaving. Apparently Lila had counted on this. She went to Edith and explained that they were leaving and had already said their good-byes to the rest of us. Edith protested the short visit, but Lila promised they would return again soon. She said nothing out of the ordinary—gave no hint of having sold the ranch or anything else. She visited for a few minutes and then said farewell and was gone.”

  “But how did she take me?”

  Ann remembered that afternoon as if it were yesterday. “We came home from church around one. By then, the household was being turned upside down. Apparently just before Lila went to say good-bye to Edith, she slipped into the nursery to say good-bye to the babies and bring the nurse a cup of tea. We figure the tea had been drugged, because the nurse said she fell asleep almost immediately. Meanwhile, from what we can figure out, Homer slipped in and took you while Lila visited with Edith. He left a bundle in your place so your absence wasn’t noticed until some hours later when the nurse woke up.”

  “But
surely other servants would have noticed Gladstone with the baby,” Mr. Coulter commented.

  Ann shrugged. “Ramsay said he noticed only that Gladstone was carrying a small valise. We presumed he put Judith inside.”

  “But didn’t Edith . . . my mother . . . think it strange that the nurse wasn’t coming to check on her or bring her the babies?” Judith asked.

  “Edith was taking medication given to her by the doctor. It made her sleep quite a bit. Once Lila left, she fell asleep. It wasn’t until close to the time we returned that the nurse came to check on her and ask if someone had brought you to her. When Edith told her no, a thorough search was immediately started. It wasn’t long before everyone presumed the worst—that Lila had taken you. The police were summoned against Edith’s desires. She didn’t want her sister getting in trouble with the law and had hoped we could just find the Gladstones and deal with them privately. However, my husband and I refused to do it that way. We spared no expense and hired private detectives as well, but there was no sign of them. They had planned it out so well that we never got so much as a hint as to where they had gone. They simply vanished. And with them, you.”

  Judith began to cry softly, and Mr. Coulter stood. “Perhaps it would be best if we were to go and let Judith consider all that you’ve told her.”

  Ann shook her head. “Nonsense. This is her home now. She’s my granddaughter, and she’ll stay with me.”

  Judith jumped up, and her teacup and saucer clattered to the floor. “No, I can’t stay here. I don’t belong here.”

  “You’re distraught, child. I’ll have Ramsay call for the doctor. He can give you something to help you rest.”

  “No!”

  Judith surprised Ann by running from the room. “Wait!”

  “Maybe you should give her some time.”