United by Their Royal Baby

by Therese Beharrie

  ‘King Zacchaeus is here, Your Majesty,’ his private secretary announced and quickly closed the door behind her.

  ‘Zacchaeus,’ Xavier said when he saw the dark-haired man he’d once considered an ally. ‘We weren’t expecting you.’

  ‘And I hadn’t expected a “we”,’ Zacchaeus answered, his brown eyes settling on Leyna.

  Xavier felt jealousy coil inside him when he saw the appreciation in Zacchaeus’ eyes, and forced himself to ignore it. Zacchaeus was baiting him, the logical side of him knew. And it was smart, he thought, when Zacchaeus’ eyes settled on him again with a glint that told Xavier it was strategy.

  ‘There’s always a “we”, Zacchaeus,’ Leyna said. ‘That “we” used to include you and your kingdom. Are you here to clarify whether that’s still the case?’

  ‘I’m here to offer my congratulations,’ Zacchaeus said easily. ‘I must say I feel partially responsible for you two finally getting together.’

  ‘Oh, you’re entirely responsible,’ Xavier answered in the same tone. ‘But, if we’re all being honest here, you already knew that.’

  ‘Yes.’ The answer was curt, Zacchaeus’ bantering tone gone. ‘And it’s disheartening to see Kirtida’s allies act as a duet as opposed to a trio.’

  ‘That tends to happen when a member of a three-way alliance removes themselves from the alliance,’ Leyna said.

  ‘That’s not entirely true, though,’ Zacchaeus answered, and something behind his guarded expression had Xavier wondering what was happening with the new King of Kirtida.

  ‘What would you call refusing to answer our requests for a meeting then?’ Xavier asked, keeping his eyes steady on Zacchaeus’ face. ‘What would you call refusing to see us when we arrived at Kirtida to talk about the future of our alliance?’

  ‘Complicated,’ Zacchaeus answered.

  ‘If this is some kind of game to you, Zacchaeus, we’re not interested,’ Leyna said. ‘All we’d like to know is whether you’re formally withdrawing from the alliance. If you aren’t, then we can use this opportunity to discuss the agreement, since you seem unfamiliar with its terms.’

  Zacchaeus’ expression darkened at her words but Leyna continued. ‘And if you are, then we should discuss the legalities of that, too. Either way, this meeting will be productive.’

  ‘You know I’ve always liked you, Leyna,’ Zacchaeus told her, his eyes lit with admiration. Although he wasn’t sure, Xavier thought it was genuine. ‘Respected you, too. And, in honour of that, I’ll be as honest with you as you are with me.’

  Xavier doubted that, but he kept silent and watched as Zacchaeus shoved his hands into his pockets. For a moment, Xavier caught a glimpse of the man he’d known growing up. But when he looked at them again, Zacchaeus’ eyes were harder, darker, and Xavier knew not to make the mistake of thinking he was the man he’d once appeared to be.

  ‘Contrary to your belief, Leyna, I am aware of the terms of the alliance. I might not have ruled for as long as either of you have, but that doesn’t mean I’m a novice,’ Zacchaeus said grimly. ‘I knew what it would mean when I chose not to attend the Banquet.’

  ‘You intended it,’ Leyna said, and something flashed across his face—could it have been uncertainty?—before he replied.

  ‘Now you both understand how serious I am about what I’m here to discuss.’

  ‘What are you here to discuss, Zacchaeus?’ Xavier interjected.

  Zacchaeus’ face went blank, except for the seriousness in his eyes. ‘We need to renegotiate the terms of the alliance. Or there will be no alliance at all.’

  Chapter Eleven

  THOUGH SHE’D EXPECTED the words the moment she’d heard about Zacchaeus’ fleet, Leyna’s chest constricted at the confirmation. She felt the insidious pulse of panic throb with each heartbeat and fought to keep it from showing on her face.

  Instead, she focused on the fact that she wasn’t supposed to have been there at all, and the indignation that came with that realisation.

  ‘You intended on renegotiating the terms of the alliance without me?’ she forced herself to say lightly. ‘I’m not sure if you meant for me to be insulted, Zacchaeus, but you’ve certainly achieved it.’

  ‘When I heard about your engagement, Leyna, I assumed Xavier would tell you everything that I told him.’

  ‘But there’s more.’

  ‘Yes,’ Zacchaeus allowed. ‘If he had agreed to renegotiating the terms when it had been only the two of us, I would have wanted assurances that Kirtida’s part of the alliance would be just as strong as Mattan’s and Aidara’s. Unfortunately, you can’t help with that.’

  Her mind quickly pieced it together, but Xavier started to ask what Zacchaeus meant and then stopped when realisation dawned on him. Horror, lined with a fear she’d never seen him show before, passed across his face, but was quickly replaced by a carefully blank expression.

  ‘Is that why your ships have been readied?’ Xavier asked, his voice dangerously low. ‘To intimidate us into negotiating with you? To intimidate me into offering you my sister?’

  ‘They were readied for the same reason yours will be as soon as I leave here, I imagine,’ Zacchaeus responded. ‘That is why this discussion is so important.’

  ‘Which terms do you want to renegotiate?’ Leyna asked quickly. She wasn’t sure Xavier would able to speak without provoking Zacchaeus.

  ‘The Protection of the Alliance of the Three Isles.’

  ‘What about it?’

  ‘I need assurance that should Kirtida be involved in a...disagreement, its allies would step in and support the action.’

  ‘That’s what the agreement currently states,’ Leyna replied, and then she frowned. ‘But since you’re here, specifically mentioning this, there’s clearly a loophole that doesn’t cover your particular kind of disagreement.’

  ‘We need protection from every country, Leyna.’ Zacchaeus’ eyes were more sombre than she’d ever seen them.

  ‘Again, that is the purpose of the Protection of the Alliance...’ Leyna trailed off. ‘You mean with one of our allies? With the alliance’s allies?’

  ‘Yes.’

  It suddenly made sense, she thought. He hadn’t come to the banquet because he might have had to face the ally he was requesting protection from.

  The pulse of panic slipped into her blood, coursing through her veins, becoming harder to ignore. She swallowed, and begged her body to give her more time.

  ‘We can’t agree to that,’ Xavier said, his eyes moving from Leyna—where it flashed with concern—to Zacchaeus. He seemed to have put his feelings about Zacchaeus’ implication aside. ‘It could undermine all of our international relationships.’

  ‘Perhaps it’s time to forge new ones.’

  ‘Zacchaeus, this isn’t something you can just decide on the spur of the moment,’ Leyna said, finding her voice again. ‘It takes thought, reasoning, negotiation. You’ve been King for a month and you already want to jump into this?’

  ‘Does this sound like something I want to jump into, Leyna?’ Zacchaeus snapped. ‘There are factors at play here that—’ He cut himself off, clenching his jaw. ‘Regardless of how long I’ve been King, I am responsible for Kirtida. And this is what is necessary to ensure that my kingdom is protected.’

  ‘What have you done, Zacchaeus?’ Xavier asked. ‘Tell us what’s happened to make this such a necessity.’

  Leyna saw the conflict in Zacchaeus’ eyes before he cleared them of emotion. ‘That’s not possible. Not now. I understand you might need some time to think this through, but I’d like you to consider this. We’re stronger as three than as one. If I withdraw from the alliance—’

  ‘There’ll be two of us and one of you?’ Xavier asked, and Leyna saw Zacchaeus’ jaw tighten once more.

  ‘There’ll be conflict,’ Zacchaeus replied. ‘It would be better for
that conflict not to be within an alliance that spans centuries.’

  He was out of the door as soon as the words had left his mouth, leaving a stunned silence behind.

  Leyna lowered herself onto the couch, forcing air into her lungs as she closed her eyes. She prayed that Xavier would give her a moment to regain control, but she didn’t check to see whether that was the case. She was painfully aware of her stomach, her heart, her chest—and she just wanted them to relax again.

  She gave herself a few minutes and then opened her eyes when she felt steadier. Xavier sat across from her, his face carefully blank.

  ‘Are you okay?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ she replied, feeling her cheeks heat. ‘I just needed a moment.’

  He nodded and got up to pour her a glass of water. ‘Is it possible that this is a side-effect—’

  ‘Of pregnancy?’ She took the water from him and watched him sit down again as she took a sip. ‘No. There should still be some time before the symptoms show up. If I’m pregnant. Besides, it’s happened before.’

  ‘And what exactly is it?’

  ‘Anxiety.’

  Now, she felt the colour seep from her cheeks. She didn’t want Xavier to know about the panic attacks she’d started having after her mother had left. They’d been much, much worse in the past but each episode—regardless of its intensity—left her feeling so incredibly vulnerable and fragile.

  She’d put those days behind her, developed strategies to cope. She hadn’t had one—the kind that had had her bodyguards develop a protocol for them anyway—in years. The dreams, like the one she’d had the other day, came and went, but not the panic attacks. It felt awful that she’d come so close in recent weeks.

  Just as she had before, she would cope.

  But she didn’t want to share that with him.

  ‘You shouldn’t have to deal with it alone,’ Xavier said, interrupting her thoughts.

  ‘With my anxiety?’ she asked, shaking her head. ‘It’s not exactly the kind of thing you can share with other people.’

  ‘Sometimes it is.’

  ‘Not in our position.’

  ‘But now we have each other.’

  Her heart stalled at the words, but she accepted them, telling herself this was all part of the cordiality they’d agreed to the night before. She nodded. ‘Yes, we do. So let’s talk about what we’re going to do about Zacchaeus.’

  It felt good to finally discuss the situation in the light of new information. Not that it was positive, Leyna thought, telling Xavier as much. They didn’t have many options. On the one hand, they could refuse to negotiate with Zacchaeus. But they didn’t know what trouble he was in, or how it would impact Mattan and Aidara.

  On the other hand, they could negotiate with him, and be impacted by that trouble willingly. But that might also entail a marriage between Nalini and Zacchaeus, which neither of them were willing to decide on.

  ‘You could talk to her,’ Leyna said. ‘Leave it completely up to her.’

  ‘And tell her what? That the future of Mattan is in her hands?’

  ‘Of course not. The future of Mattan is in our hands. But how are we going to make a decision about either of our kingdoms without knowing what all of our options are?’

  ‘If Nalini did agree to marry Zacchaeus, how would that help us decide on what to do?’

  ‘I know this is hard, Xavier.’ Leyna resisted the urge to lean forward, to grip his hand with hers. Boundaries. ‘But we have to make some kind of decision. And, based on Zacchaeus’ reaction, we won’t have very long to make it.’

  ‘If we don’t negotiate with him, we have war between the Isles and a possible external threat. We’ll break a centuries-long alliance and threaten the trust of our people, putting their lives at risk.’ He got up and poured himself a drink now. ‘If we do, we have no war between the Isles, face a possible external threat, and my sister has to marry the man who’s put us in this situation in the first place.’

  ‘Those are our options,’ Leyna confirmed, her gaze staying on him. She waited for what she knew—what she’d feared—would come next.

  ‘If we’d just waited before doing all of this, we might not have been in this situation.’

  ‘We did wait, Xavier,’ Leyna said, forcing coolness into her tone. ‘And you know our actions are the reason Zacchaeus was here in the first place. Why he was willing to talk about this at all.’

  And because it was easier to pre-empt, she said, ‘In my view, our best option is to talk to Zacchaeus about the protection clause in the alliance agreement. But we’ll ask him for a week to consider it before we tell him that we’ve made a decision.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because we’ll find out whether I’m pregnant in a week.’ She went on, needing to accept the finality of her words, ‘If I’m not, we go to Zacchaeus as equals—all three of us. Nalini won’t have to marry Zacchaeus and—’

  ‘You mean break off our engagement?’ She nodded. ‘So you get to break up with me all over again.’

  ‘There’s nothing to break up, Xavier,’ she said, ignoring the emotion inside her that screamed the contrary. ‘And you can’t deny that you were looking for a way out. I’m offering you one. So, if I’m not pregnant, you’ll protect your sister and we’ll protect our kingdoms.’

  She didn’t wait for a reply, leaving the room—leaving his company—so she could catch her breath again. The panic wouldn’t be as easily abated this time, she thought, which had the tension in her chest increasing.

  She escaped as far as she could away from the library, hoping no one would see her. But with each step the pressure grew, eventually causing her to stop and press her back against the nearest wall.

  She didn’t know how long she stood there, nor did she care. All she knew was that her head suddenly felt as if it were on a roundabout and her lungs felt as if they were burning.

  ‘Leyna.’

  She nearly groaned when she heard Xavier’s voice, but instead opened her eyes. ‘I just need a few moments.’

  ‘And you can have them,’ Xavier answered softly. ‘In private.’

  ‘Okay,’ she replied, but couldn’t bring herself to move. After a few seconds, Xavier sighed and scooped her into his arms just as easily as he had the night before.

  ‘You don’t have to do this,’ she said automatically.

  ‘No, apparently, I do,’ he said in strained annoyance.

  She didn’t see where he took her and only realised she was in his bedroom when he laid her on the bed. She rested her head against the pillows and watched him open the windows. The sea air immediately filled the room, stilling some of the spinning in her head.

  ‘Why do you insist on doing this to yourself?’

  ‘It’s not a choice.’

  He started to pace. ‘Fine, but I thought you were going to let me help you.’

  ‘How can I let you help when you’re the one making me feel this way?’

  He stopped. ‘I make you anxious?’

  ‘Yes. No.’ She sighed. ‘I don’t know if it’s you or the situation.’

  ‘Both, probably,’ he said, and lowered himself next to her on the bed. ‘How can I make it better?’

  ‘You can’t. Not unless you can go back to the past and change everything I did to ruin us.’ She was tired, she thought, and blamed that for the slip. ‘I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have...’ She shook her head. ‘Boundaries.’

  ‘I didn’t agree with that idea then and I don’t agree with it now.’

  ‘Really? So you want to keep going back over the past like a broken record? Because that’s what it feels like, Xavier. And I can’t stop listening to the stupid record because every time I see you it plays on repeat.’

  ‘Then let it,’ he said, and turned towards her. ‘Let it play.’

  ‘And what would that achieve? W
hat would replaying that hurt, those mistakes, possibly achieve?’

  ‘It’ll remind us of what we need to stay away from in the future.’

  ‘Why, Xavier? There is no future for us. There can’t be. Not when so much has happened.’

  He didn’t reply immediately, and she could hear emotion in his voice when he spoke, though she couldn’t identify it. ‘Is that why you have the dreams, the anxiety attacks?’

  ‘No, those come from ruling a kingdom by myself with no support.’

  ‘But having no support is because of the choices, the mistakes you’ve made, isn’t it?’

  Realising what he was doing, she moved to the opposite end of the bed from where he sat and set her feet on the ground. ‘This was a mistake. I shouldn’t have said anything.’

  ‘It wasn’t a mistake, Leyna.’ He got off the bed, turned to face her. ‘It was you finally being honest with yourself.’

  She let out a bitter laugh. ‘I am being honest with myself. I’m facing the fact that this marriage isn’t something you want, let alone this child. Or maybe it is, but just not with me. You moved on, remember?’ she said before he could protest. ‘And you were so reluctant to go ahead with this plan.’

  ‘This was my plan, Leyna. Getting married was my suggestion.’

  ‘Because your kingdom was in danger!’ Leyna knew she should leave but something wouldn’t let her. ‘You had years to salvage our relationship.’

  ‘So did you!’

  ‘And how would I do that? Come to see you and your wife and tell you that I’d made a terrible mistake and that I still loved you?’

  Chapter Twelve

  ‘LOVED,’ LEYNA SAID in a voice just as stunned as the expression on her face. ‘I said loved. Past tense.’

  ‘When did you stop loving me?’ Xavier asked, ignoring the voice that warned him not to.

  ‘When you got married to someone else.’

  ‘But you said that you would have had to tell me and Erika that you still loved me. Which would mean you still loved me when I was married.’

  ‘I was talking about when you two were dating,’ Leyna said, though he heard the desperation in her tone. ‘Why does it matter?’ She didn’t wait for an answer. ‘We have enough to deal with in our present, Xavier. And in our future. We don’t have to keep going back to the past.’ She gave him a beseeching look. ‘Okay?’