Hollow Sight

by Kristie Pierce

  “Okay, Liam. I promise.”

  “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s come over me. But I can’t lose you.”

  “You won’t.”

  He starts to step away from me, so I grab his shirt and wind my fingers around his collar so he can’t step any further. I yank him back to me and his face is so sad that it breaks my heart. As I attempt to come up with a reason for his sudden depression, the whip cracks again in my head.

  “Excuse me,” I say as I hop down from the counter. I wheel around to look in every direction. My eyes dart around the kitchen and when I don’t find anything, I half-run toward the living room. As I bound around the door frame, I rock back on my heels. Liam’s right on my tail and he smacks into my suddenly rigid body.

  There, standing directly in front of us with honey colored hair and what I am sure to be eyes like the sky, stands Evie. She has her back to us and is staring out the window, but as she notices our approach, she turns. She stares at Liam. Then, her blue eyes turn to me.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  “What is it?” Liam asks as he bends down to kiss my neck. My eyes widen at Evie; I don’t know what she’ll think of this. She looks calm enough.

  She turns her gaze back to Liam and watches him with soft eyes while remaining perfectly still and utterly silent. The whole situation feels awkward to me. Liam’s ex-deceased-girlfriend, whatever she is, watching her … ex... is that what Liam would be considered to her?... boyfriend kissing on another girl. I think for sure that that will bring some sort of tension into the room with Evie present, or so it seems it should be that way. Liam still doesn’t consciously know she’s here although I’m positive he can sense her. But it appears now I’m the only one feeling any sort of tension. Sera’s words pop into my mind like a flash of lightning over a dark night sky: You seem to forget that life as we know it on Earth ceases to exist once we die.

  “Breckin,” he murmurs in my ear, a hint of frustration in his voice. I blink in reaction to his voice, bringing me out of my reverie.

  “Aren’t you going to tell him I’m here for a visit?” Evie asks in a high soprano. “It is his birthday after all. I think it perfectly fitting that I drop in.”

  I turn around to face Liam, totally ignoring Evie. There’s something off about her, something that makes me very leery of her presence. I don’t like that she’s here as the last time I’d encountered her with Liam present it ended very badly for me. I just want her to go away. I don't think that’s too unacceptable of me. But still. There’s just something about her that would make me feel ten times better if she were gone excluding the way I feel about her.

  “How do you feel?” I ask while raising an eyebrow. I intently look Liam in the eye; it’s a silent effort on my part to hint to him that she’s here. I know that he’s aware of her subconsciously as he proved so long ago in my room, but just how much he can sense, I don't know. He also told me the day… the day he… No. Don’t go there, I think. I’m unsure why, but too, I don’t want to announce her presence aloud. Not yet, anyway.

  “Fine, Breckin, why?” he asks, confused.

  “Focus,” I say as I put my fingers to his temples. “I know you’re feeling really sad right now -”

  “Breckin, what is this about?” he asks, cutting me off.

  “Focus, Liam,” I say again.

  I have not a clue what I’m doing exactly. For some reason, a peculiar intuition has come over me. I feel that I have a curious ability to help Liam see what I’m trying to make him realize. My fingers are twitching and stinging at my sides. I want him to focus on his abrupt feeling of sadness and then to focus on the reason behind it. I don’t know how, but I know that if he thinks about it hard enough, he’ll realize why he feels the way he does now.

  I reach up to touch the skin at Liam's temples, and as I do, an abrupt luminescent energy radiates from the tips of my fingers caressing his skin. A white light comes to glow from my hands as I lightly trail my fingertips down his cheeks and over the length of his jaw. The light illuminates brighter as seconds tick by and leaves an airy and sparkling golden trail on his skin where I’ve touched him. He jumps with the heat of my touch, but otherwise doesn’t move away. He blinks, looking completely astonished and then focuses – focuses hard – as he stares into my eyes. Liam’s eyes glaze over for a short moment and then something unknown seems to flash within them. Then, he slowly shifts his gaze into the direction of where Evie stands.

  I hear Evie’s audible gasp. She murmurs in disbelief to herself, but I don’t pay attention to what she’s saying. As I pull away, my fingertips feel like they’re on fire, but not to the point of scalding my skin. They are definitely warmer than usual, but it’s a comforting type of heat; like being wrapped up in a heated blanket next to a fire after playing outside in the frigid snow too long. Hot. I draw back my hands and look to them as if expecting my skin to be glowing like the end of a branding iron left over red-hot coals too long. They look the same as usual as I stare down at them although the pads of my fingers are tingling again. Liam reaches down to grab my hands and lifts them back to his face.

  “What was that?” he says with shock coloring his words.

  “I… don’t know,” I stammer. I’m unsure. I’m not even sure why I’d thought to do it. Some underlying need to put my fingers to Liam’s skin suddenly overtook my hands and I simply obeyed.

  Evie clears her throat. I look up to Liam and see that he’s again looking into the direction of where she’s standing. Evie hasn’t moved closer, but she also appears to be focusing very hard on something. A single tear rolls down Liam’s cheek and it’s enough for me to lose my cool. I whirl around to face Evie, and with every ounce of anger I now feel I center directly at her.

  “Stop it!” I yell.

  “What are you talking about?” Liam asks. He takes my face into his hands and forces me to look at him. I yank away and turn toward Evie again.

  “Why are you doing that?!” I exclaim to her.

  “Doing what?” she asks with a small smirk.

  “That!” I shriek, pointing to Liam. His eyes seem to have glazed over once more and I can see that he’s trying rattlingly hard to keep his composure intact. “Can’t you see what it does to him? Whatever it is that you’re doing, stop.” Liam grabs my arm as I take a step toward her. I don’t know what it is I plan to do when I get to Evie, being I can’t exactly touch her. But I can certainly glare at her. I’ll have a good old fashioned stare down with her although I want to do much, much worse. Something about her now makes me very angry.

  “Evie,” Liam says, as he realizes who is with us.

  “Yes.” I breathe, backing into his chest. He understands now, as I knew he would.

  “Calm down, Breckin, I’m not trying to do anything.” Evie says as she crosses her delicate arms over her chest. I don’t completely believe her.

  “Yes, you are! I can see that you are!” The hairs on my arms and neck are now rising, prickling with a backdrop fear of Evie. I feel very protective of Liam with her here, though. I can see that it still affects him – in a painful way – for her to be near. The reasons behind him leaving me pour into the forefront of my mind, pooling and collecting like an unwanted puddle of doubt, as I realize with an abrupt fury that I don’t blame Joseph for Liam’s departure – I blame her.

  I know Liam’s reasons for leaving me. He blamed my agonizing pain from Joseph’s presence as the main contributor as to why he could no longer be with me – because he drew Joseph to him, and then, of course to me. But deep down I still have a suspecting feeling that Evie is the cause – even though it’s for different reasons than what Liam originally had said. It’s clear that he can’t and won’t forget if she continues visiting and pushing her presence on him – as that is what I can see she’s doing. But her presence has almost too much of an influence. I know, too, that one of the reasons Joseph’s appearance causes me so much pain is because he isn’t at peace, because he has yet to crossover. And although I’m un
sure why that is, it’s still a very dominant reason. I watch Liam’s unhappiness growing in intensity through his beautifully tormented eyes, and I feel my anger toward Evie cultivate into an anger big enough to make me shake. That’s when puzzle pieces begin to plunk slowly but hazily into place.

  In a matter of a few seconds I recall all the moments I’d seen Evie since the day Liam had left. That first time in my room when Liam was so miserable with grief, then each day at school after he had broken my heart, as she would just happen to appear at my most miserable moments – I realize that now. I hadn’t paid much attention to her as it were, but I still noticed little details. She looked much like she does standing here in front of us. Soft honey hair, eyes so blue, very much like she’s still alive. Funny for her to look that way, I think idly. But I still can't quite piece it all together. There’s something I’m missing.

  “I can hear her,” Liam says quietly.

  I whirl to face him. “WHAT!?”

  “Yes, I can hear her, Breckin. I can tell that she’s standing over there by the window. Her voice is… off, but I can tell it’s still Evie.” His voice cracks on the her name. I’m completely speechless. My jaw hangs open and I don’t think I’ve managed to take a breath.

  “Can you see me?” Evie asks with great enthusiasm.

  “No. How is this possible?” He wonders, not taking his eyes away from Evie’s general area. I swallow, hard, and shake my head, feeling utterly flabbergasted and wildly out of control. “Is she still here?” he asks quietly.

  “Yes.” I manage to answer, just as quiet.

  I’ve become dizzy and my head has started to ache very slightly. He’s going to leave me again, I just know it. With Evie here, all the fears of him loving her instead of me come crashing to the surface. His words repeat in my head; I realized that maybe I was just reliving my feelings for Evie instead of loving you. Over and over again like a bad re-run, all I hear is the echo of what Liam had said that day – the day I have been trying with every ounce of my soul to forget. Tears begin to well in my eyes.

  “Damn,” Evie says then.

  “I can hear her as though she’s really here.” Liam murmurs while maneuvering around me. I want to reach out to him, to pull him back to me and keep him at my side, but my hands are trembling and I’ve become rooted in place.

  “Yes,” I manage to answer again. “Because she really is here.” My voice is monotone and completely lifeless.

  “Can you hear all of them this way?”

  “No. Not exactly.”

  He’s walking toward her now and Evie opens her arms for him as if she thinks she can scoop him into her arms and embrace him. I gasp when he reaches her and then hold my breath as he stops directly in front of her. Any other day I would’ve thought it preposterous for a spirit to think that they could touch and feel someone living, or rather, the living person be able to feel the spirit. But at the moment, I am not so sure of anything.

  I take a shaky step and try walking to Liam. I trip over my own two feet, but after reaching him I intertwine my unsure hand with his as very silent tears escape my horrified eyes. He takes my hand eagerly and looks down to read my wet eyes. Liam slowly but very deliberately reaches a hand up to wipe away the never ending tears as I squeeze my hand tightly around his, trying to wordlessly convey just how scared I am. Not scared to have Evie next to us necessarily – although there’s definitely something secretly terrifying about her – but scared to have him walk out of my life again. I know that I won’t survive it.

  “Happy birthday” Evie says politely.

  Liam looks toward her and shouts, “Thank you!”

  “I’m not deaf, Liam, bloody hell you don’t have to holler at me,” she says as she sticks a finger to one ear. In any other situation it would be comical.

  “This is amazing,” Liam exclaims enthusiastically.

  Sera, I chant. Sera, Sera… I need you right now. Please, Sera.

  “Well, I wonder why he can’t see me. Hmm...”

  “He can’t,” I begin to answer her in a soft voice, but then stop because I don’t know why. I’m having a hard enough time wrapping my brain around the fact that Liam can hear her.

  “But I am more than happy to know that he can hear me. Finally.”

  “What do you mean, finally?” I ask cautiously. “You're doing this?”

  Liam’s eyes dart from Evie’s general area and back to my eyes, back and forth, between our conversation but doesn’t interrupt.

  “I’ve been trying so hard all this time to make him actually see me. But hearing me works just as well, I suppose. Everyone still amongst the living has the potential if they tune into it, and if the…person,” she smirks, “is willing enough to show themselves. At first I tried every day. While he was in the hospital it was especially hard. He was really out of it and I was very new to all of this. A couple of times I thought he finally did realize I was there, but when I looked closer I could see that it was just the pain making his body respond. He was almost unrecognizable; covered in bruises, tubes sticking out of him, monitors beeping …”

  As Evie blathers on in her explanation, I’m able to picture what she’s telling me as if I was standing in front of the horrific scene myself. I’m walking, slowly reaching Liam’s side as he lay broken and incoherent, motionless in a hospital bed. His face unrecognizable as it’s swollen and black and blue. There’s a cut above his upper lip and he has a long row of stitches in his hair line, then another row through the length of his left eyebrow. I reach out to touch his delicate face only to find that I can’t. My eyes trail down his destroyed body and I see one of his legs looks bigger than the other as it rests under the white blankets – the cast, I remember. An oxygen tube has been placed beneath his battered nose and his breath comes in and out, but not without effort. There’s another tube – this one with discolored fluid coming from it – sticking out from a mound of white gauze over one side of his bare chest. The rest of his skin is covered in long gashes and scrapes. There are monitors posted on either side of him: one beeping unnaturally slow keeping pace with his sluggish heart, and one attached to wires coming from his chest and back. Another screen contains a bunch of numbers and lines and I realize that it must be keeping track of his other lifelines that all seem very feeble and frail. It makes me shudder as I realize I can see it all too well. It isn’t just Evie’s words that paint the picture for me – it’s her actual memories.

  “Stop. Please.” I whisper.

  “Stop what?” she asks in the same polite tone.

  “I can see… what you’re remembering. I don’t know how… but please, just stop.”

  “You can?” Liam and Evie ask in unison.

  “Yes. And I don’t want to see anymore.”

  Evie is the next to speak. “I’ve been testing this new little talent out so much on Liam that I didn’t stop to think of it effecting other people. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, what with your own little talent, that you would actually be able to really see. You do have a gift, don’t you?” she wonders in an ominous tone.

  “What is she showing you?” Liam asks in my ear.

  “She's showing me… when you were in the hospital… after your accident.” I whisper. I’ve become sick to my stomach. Seeing Liam so broken and vulnerable causes my already quivering frame to begin to shake uncontrollably. I drop to my knees, clutching my chest as the pain sets in. The agony of seeing Liam that way overshadows the pain brought by Joseph’s presence – surprisingly, and I just can’t bear to see him like that. And although I know that it’s in the past and that Liam is okay, it still influences me greatly. It feels as though I'd actually been there when it happened.

  Liam kneels down next to me and reaches for me, bringing me on to his lap. He grasps my face in between his hands and whispers, “I’m right here. Shhh. I’m right here. No need to worry now, Breckin.” His words are no doubt an effort to soothe me, but Evie’s memories are now burned into my head and I cannot shake it.

&n
bsp; “Of all the memories to share, Evie,” he says in disapproval.

  “I’m not sharing, only remembering. She’s quite more talented than even she knows,” Evie examines sardonically. Her tone tugs at me, making me think she doesn’t like this about me, but I’m too overtaken with the gut wrenching feeling that Liam will find a reason to leave now that Evie seems to be able to affect me, too.

  “Liam,” I whisper. “You can’t leave me. Please.”

  “Shhh,” he soothes again. “I’m not going anywhere. I love you. So much. And I know that it isn’t possible for me to leave you again.”

  I am now clutching to his shirt in complete desperation. I’m unsure why – as I’m not sure about much at all today – but I have an uncontrollable need to be with him surge through me. It’s much, much more than want or desire. It’s vital to my soul. I have to be with him in every way possible. All my senses are more alive than I would’ve ever thought to be achievable, even for me. Fear, anger, joy, excitement, resentment, love, lust, desire, hate…. All of it – it’s all wrapped up tightly, bound in a little ball of impressive sensation. If I don’t have some way to release it soon, with its expanding seams threatening to rip apart, I’m going to go insane. And for some odd reason, my sense of release is an unexplained craving for Liam.

  I ignore the fact that Evie is here to witness. I don’t care who sees me losing control and the control I have left is minimal. I eagerly bring my lips to his and kiss him, using all the strength I have to keep his face to mine. I can feel the reluctance beneath his touch, but again, I don’t care. This new feeling of need has possessed my body and I can’t pull myself close enough or fast enough to him. I weave my hands into his messy hair and continue to kiss his lips fervently, feeling every inch of his soft mouth moving with mine. I swivel around in his lap and allowing my legs to wrap around his waist as I press my chest against his, feeling my heart hammering against my ribs and echoing in my ears. Every memory of the last couple of months flood to the surface, every moment without him, every lost minute, every taken chance I’ve been denied, all of it now controls and consumes me.