The Healer's Kiss: Book Four of the Forced To Serve Series
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“Like yours isn’t right now?” Malachi demanded in return. “You thought nothing of causing me pain even though I have yet to take any step to harm you or the sibling of your host body that you seem so fond of deceiving. So tell me, Rena Trax, or whoever you are, which of us is acting more from our dark side?”
“You might have made some changes to your nature, but you’re still a demon,” Rena said firmly, ignoring his logic. What did he know of the burdens she bore? Had he responsibility for the spirits of others? For setting them on their path to redemption? No. He had not.
Ania snorted and crossed her arms. “Your aversion to Malachi makes you a hypocrite. The being you call your sibling, the one you made sure joined our crew, has carried demon number three on board the Liberator. No one could consider that normal behavior for any servant of the Creators. The lesson you seem to be learning is one I accepted long ago. A being only has the power the Creators see fit to grant them—demon or not. Malachi is no different.”
Rena sagged. “I concede to there being some wisdom in what you say about all creatures bowing to the will of the Creators. I agree to cause Malachi no further harm. Now, please—release me. I will not harm your crew. You have my word.”
“Not just yet,” Ania said firmly. “Tell us your story first. For starters, what are you? Explain your origin, and I want the truth of the matter.”
“The body that hosts me was never meant for me. Long ago, so long ago now I no longer recall the time, I allowed the Creators to liberate my energy from my original physical form so that I could serve them as their emissary. As sacred energy, I moved about freely, visiting physical entities and delivering divine help,” Rena explained. “However, I made a miscalculation in performing my last task. To fix it, I had to temporarily become Rena Trax.”
“Yes, but who are you really?” Malachi demanded, still wanting to know.
She looked at Malachi and lifted her chin. “Unlike you, I have no name, no identity outside being an emissary, and no lasting attachment to any creature or world. In energy form, those like me are free of the needs of the flesh. The original spirit, called Rena Trax, returned to the Creators and left her physical form behind to rot. I borrowed it out of necessity, but my emissary energy dims a little more each day I remain corporeal. I admit that I fear being trapped in this flesh and forced to serve out a life plan that was never meant to be mine.”
“Okay. That’s your history. Now why are you on our ship?” Ania asked. “You were on the Paladin before us.”
“For several of your Earth years, I have been tracking the demon’s amulet Captain Synar now has in his possession. The demon Seta carries belongs in that amulet. The task to find it has occupied me for too long. I wish to do what I must and be released.”
“What will happen to what’s left of Seta Trax when you take the demon out of her body?” Ania asked. “I can read very clearly that the original female’s spirit is still controlling it at the moment.”
“Seta’s physical form will cease to have any life, as will Rena Trax’s after it has served its purpose for me,” she explained, frowning at the Pleiadian’s disapproving glare.”
“That’s a pretty cold, not to mention selfish, way of looking at things. I know, because I have done that many times,” Malachi said, crossing his arms. “Yet after many hosts, I still mourn some forms and beings. If you have not experienced corporeal life in a while, you may find yourself surprised by the depth of the connection you make to the life you share. Energy connected intimately to flesh is a heady combination.”
Ania listened to Malachi explaining his experiences, but it was the seriousness in his gaze that pleased her most. She knew he was admitting more to the emissary than he had ever shared with Liam or her.
“How did you and the demon come to be in the dual-birth Trax siblings?” Ania asked finally, inserting herself firmly in a conversation that kept leaning towards being a private one between Malachi and the emissary.
“After my. . .mistake. . .I found I could not leave Ethos in energy form. When I was traveling and looking for a solution to my dilemma, I came across the mostly dead bodies of both sisters. I put the demon in the one less damaged, and bound it to only lending Seta Trax life. I put my energy in the other. By leaving their remaining memories intact, the Demon Zorinda and I share what is left of their corporeality. While this situation has lasted much longer than I intended, as Seta and Rena Trax, we have been able to move around where necessary and communicate without causing alarm.”
“Okay—next question. Why not just get another amulet? The Creators could just make a new one. Why is this particular amulet so important?” Ania demanded.
Rena closed her eyes. “Each demon amulet is imbued by the Creators of All with exposure to those things the demon entity requires for its redemption. It was my fault the Demon Zorinda’s amulet was misplaced. For punishment, I was forced to meld the demon’s energies with mine to carry it around. The darkness was unbearable. I don’t know how you live with it or why you would tie yourself to it permanently.”
“Let’s leave my life choices out of this,” Ania said firmly. “Your snide disapproval just makes me more resistant to your tale.”
“I am merely sharing my own aversion to demon energy. To continue my story, I had to resort to certain measures to make my actions seem as natural as possible. Each time I tried to use my powers to hasten making our way to the amulet, the way was either blocked or the amulet changed hands. I have used Seta’s service on each ship to bring me ever closer to its location. During a recent meditation, I was told that a demon master had found it and that it was now safe. When Synar contacted Seta for work, I suddenly knew where it was and that the Creators had guided us to it. Now, at last, I am here.”
Ania shook her head. “I don’t know if I trust you. You could have just told Synar the whole story and asked for the amulet.”
“Would your mate have aided me if he knew Seta carried its demon within her?” Rena asked.
“I agree it would have been a challenge to convince Liam to let another demon stay on board,” Ania said sincerely. “But you didn’t have to torture Malachi just because you could. That’s not representing your cause well.”
“I took the same protective actions with him that I take with every demon,” Rena said, frowning at the Pleiadian’s harsh judgment of her actions.
“I have never harmed a creature on this ship. And Ania can tell you I’ve been compelled to fix every bleeding-heart female I run across. Does this seem like normal demon behavior to you? I am not normal. Being hosted in Ania has changed me,” Malachi insisted, walking close enough to her to peer into her gaze and make sure the emissary was hearing him. “It is not comfortable, nor easy, but I have adapted. You might be best served to study me instead of trying to harm me. Perhaps you could answer the questions I have not been able to discern about my fate. I do not yet know why I am now ruled by compassion.”
He told himself not to care about the entity’s opinion of him, but it could not be helped. Behind him, Ania sighed.
“Let us cease debating my past actions and Malachi’s changes,” Ania said. “Neither addresses my current concerns, most of whom are still frozen behind me. The emissary and I will talk with Synar privately about the amulet’s return. There is no reason any of the others need be told specifics yet.”
“So you plan to forfeit the remaining life of both host bodies?” Dorian asked, daring to speak directly at last to the creature he now despised instead of revering. It was an exceedingly sad moment in his life to realize it.
Rena nodded, the Siren’s empathetic response tweaking her guilt at last. “Yes. It was not fair of me to extend them as I did, but I was compelled to go into this physical form. I do not like being corporeal.”
“Though these forms are indeed fragile, as you reminded me with your painful gut cramps, there are many positive things about them as well. Release her, Ania,” Malachi ordered. “I wish to show her one.”
&n
bsp; “No, you don’t,” Ania said to him, the image of what Malachi intended blooming fully in her mind.
“I would never do anything to harm you or those you care about. Trust me,” Malachi demanded, holding Ania’s gaze until she sighed in defeat.
“Wait,” Dorian said raising a hand, but Ania was already speaking the words of release.
Rena sagged when she felt the invisible restraints lifted.
“You owe me a boon of repentance for causing me unnecessary pain,” Malachi informed her. “I will accept the mild suffering of your physical form.”
“And what would you have me suffer, demon?” Rena countered, her gaze flashing brightly at the neutrality in his. She did not want or need the demon’s sympathy for her plight.
Malachi moved swiftly, swooping down without warning for an invasive kiss. Not having practiced such actions in Conor’s body, his efforts were clumsy and inept, but still enough to send the Norblade male body into a humming state, a vibration clamoring as he made himself release her mouth. Her dazed look of surprise proved too tempting.
“Ever shared a vibration before, my wicked Angel?” he whispered irreverently, swooping to her mouth again, even as the jagged, desperate vibration sought refuge in her. The emissary’s surprise at the physical pleasure he forced through Rena’s form swept through every physical cell in his form as well. For a moment, Malachi almost felt ashamed. He had not expected it to feel so—well, it just wasn’t like the usual voyeuristic way he enjoyed bonding.
Rising away from her mouth and her body, Malachi turned to see everyone in the room out of their trances, but also staring at him in absolute shock.
“What? It was just a kiss—mostly,” he defended, lifting his hands as he glared at them all. “It’s not like I haven’t watched all of you kiss someone. Before you judge my actions with the emissary, remember I have carnal knowledge of several intimidating women on this ship. Two are in this room right now.”
Malachi grinned at his own reasoning until he turned back to see Rena with fingertips pressed to her lips. The innocent act had regret blooming into a flush of embarrassment as awareness of both his vulnerability and hers swept over him.
Worse, instead of feeling more in control of the situation, all he could think about was kissing the haughty female again. And what would it take to make her like it? He had collected his boon in the way that seemed right to him. There was no lasting harm in what he had done to her. Nothing to merit ending up in demon oblivion, he reassured himself, realizing his bonding urge for her was only going to be more tormenting now.
Malachi’s voice was soft, but from the way she stared at him in shock still, his sincerity level was not high enough to reach his eyes. “If I was capable of regret, I might actually feel some right now. But I’m simply not emotionally programmed for it. I suppose that means I await your retribution.”
He walked stiffly to the side of the room.
Rena dropped her fingers from her mouth and stared at the demon. The pleasurable sensations now coursing through her physical body bound her to it even more. Ironically, the demon’s actions had exacted a level of revenge that he must never know about, since because of her vow to Ania, she might not be able to stop him from further actions. She vowed to keep her distance and not let him learn of his effect on her.
Ania shook her head to clear it of the image of Malachi passionately kissing a creature who had sent him to the floor mere minutes before. Males, she thought fondly, turning to her own irrational mate with a soft smile.
“Liam? Now that she is recovered, you and I need to go with Rena Trax to our quarters to discuss something in private. You no longer need fear her actions. The emissary and I have reached an accord about using her power. She seems to have none over me. However, the important thing right now is that her intentions are not to cause any more harm.”
Synar walked to his mate and stared into her gaze. “Business in a moment. Are you well, Ania? Do not lie to me.”
Ania patted his shoulder and ran a comforting hand down his arm. “Yes, Liam. I am well—better than you can imagine. We all are. Thank the Creators for their intervention.”
“Just what the hell is going on here?” Gwen demanded as she got over the shock of seeing Malachi kissing the dangerous female.
Seconds later, her thoughts scrambled as she was swept up in arms that clutched her tightly. Her mate’s concerns and fears threatened to take her under as he trembled in her arms.
“Zade, turn me loose. Damn it—that’s a freaking order. What is the matter with you? We’ve got real problems here,” Gwen exclaimed, trying to push away, but he wasn’t letting her.
Rena laughed out loud at the Siren’s extreme relief to find his mate lived, but it also immediately evoked shame in her. True, her head was still spinning from the demon’s kiss, and yet her gaze swept the room in wonder. All those she viewed hated and distrusted her now despite the healing light she brought with her. Instead, they completely trusted the demon host female who was obviously battling with the darkness she had brought into herself.
Shaking her head, she turned to Seta, waving her hand as her physical sibling started to rise. Seta immediately fell back to the bed unconscious, still unaware of all that had happened. Rena hoped to constrain what Seta knew until she had acquired the amulet. It seemed more compassionate to do so.
Chiang bent to check the new lieutenant again as the female’s head hit the pillow, eyes rolling up. He was still not sure what was going on. One minute he was examining the patients. The next he felt a numbness. Then he came back to awareness while Rena Trax was talking. He still couldn’t believe Malachi had kissed her.
“She is fine, Doctor—merely sleeping,” Rena said to him, sliding off the adjacent medical table to stand. She bowed her head to Captain Synar. “Ania Looren has convinced me that I chose an incorrect path to achieve my ends. My apologies if I frightened you or your crew. I wish now to try a different path.”
“Was Dorian correct? Are you an emissary of the Creators?” Synar asked, using the term Dorian would have used.
Rena nodded. “Yes. Dorian Zade is correct about many things, I imagine. He is also how I found you at last.”
Dorian finally let go of Gwen to round again on the strange female who had shaken his beliefs. “What do you mean? We have not met according to my recollection.”
“Actually, we have. You recently traveled in spirit form to consult with the Creators about recovering your memories. I was the closest emissary nearby to assist, so you came to me. You told me what I wanted to know, and in exchange I gave you your memories back as you desired, or at least all that existed. The drugs they gave you during your captivity had a very negative effect on your energy as well as your body,” Rena explained.
“So you’re saying those five hours Zade was meditating and passed out in a healing trance, he was somewhere in spirit talking to you?” Gwen exclaimed.
“Yes. Emissaries are charged with answering the spiritual calls of the devoted who are asking for help, but rather remarkably your mate ended up helping me in return. It is the way of the universe to foster such favorable exchanges,” Rena said with a smile, walking to Dorian. “May I give you another gift as a way to make amends for frightening you about your mate? I swear by the Creators that I will not harm you in doing so. I merely intend to build a small bridge in your mind which will provide you access to something you seek.”
Dorian stepped away from Gwen a modest distance and nodded. Just like he’d wanted to hear Malachi’s side of his experiences at the mercy of the Creators, he now wanted to know what this creature knew as well.
Rena smiled and placed a hand on each side of his forehead. Moments later Dorian inhaled and swore in Siren, his face flooding with embarrassment worse than Malachi’s had moments before.
“Thank you for the gift,” he choked, the words hard to get out as the memories rolled fast and hard, and very, very, very explicitly. He refused to look at his mate. He didn’t dare.
When they were gone, Gwen turned to Zade and saw him looking at her with an expression of pain on his face. “Okay. Give it to me straight and don’t spare the details. What the hell did that bitch do to you?”
“She unlocked the memories of our mating week. I remember now, Gwen. I remember everything. Why would you let me take advantage of you in such a crude manner? You repeatedly left your duties for me.”
“Raging fires of Helios, how many times are we going to have to have this conversation?” Gwen asked in return, laughing at his true remorse. She studied her attractive mate for a couple heartbeats before smiling. Good thing it was something so benign. “I let you do it then for the same damn reason I still do.”
Dorian pulled her into his arms and hugged her hard. He wanted her so badly it was a pain all over his body. First he needed to fight the fear that she might have died, and now there was the true knowing that she wanted him as every Siren male dreams his mate will. “I feel like I’m always starting over with you. Your capitulation was greater than anyone explained.”
“No one knew what we did, you big dummy. Do you think I went around bragging about our every bonding experience?” Seeing no one but Chiang to witness, Gwen slipped her arms around the man she craved like no other to whisper in his ear. “No female could deny the perfect mate no matter how many times a day he made his demands known.”
“Sweet Joy,” Dorian whispered roughly, touching his forehead to hers. He didn’t dare show affection yet. Chiang would end up with an education in Siren domination. “I long to be worthy of those words.”
“Good. I like a humble male. You know, Zade, that spiritual stuff you devote yourself to makes for one hell of an adventure. Between you and Ania, your deities are keeping us all busy. Now the Liberator has a demon putting inappropriate bonding moves on one of their freaking angels. You’re going to have your work cut out for you counseling Malachi. He’s going to be a tougher sell on restraint than Chiang.”