Through the Mist: Restoration

by C. Renee Freeman

  He held her as sobs racked her body. “Please give me one more night, just one night,” she pleaded. “Let me feel loved again.”

  He bent low, and she lifted her face to his. Their lips parted when they met, and the kiss immediately deepened. Her tongue slowly slipped into his mouth, a hot flame that seared him to the core. Benjamin’s arms tightened around her. He let his hands explore the curves of her body and dared to caress her breasts. How many nights had he dreamed of touching her so intimately?

  He could no longer resist the sweet pleasures of her flesh as he glided one hand down her back and grabbed her deliciously round bottom. Pulling her body against him, he wanted her to feel his growing excitement. To his surprise, she wrapped her left leg around him and urged him closer. She was driving him mad with desire.

  He tugged at the cloth of her nightgown, gathering the hem into his hands. He withdrew from the kiss and looked into her eyes. Was she afraid? Did she want to stop? No, he only saw the growing need he himself felt. He smiled at her boldness when she took the garment from him and lifted it over her head, tossing it to the floor.

  “You are the most amazing woman in the world, Tilly,” Benjamin murmured. He marveled at the beauty of her smooth, soft skin which glowed in the soft firelight. He lowered his head and teased a nipple with his tongue. She arched her back, grabbing his head and entwining her fingers in his auburn hair.

  In dismay, he understood how much their height difference had a negative effect on foreplay. He reluctantly withdrew from their embrace and led her toward the bed. He was shocked when Tilly shoved him onto it. She tugged at his boots, which seemed to be glued to his feet. With a chuckle, he helped her remove them. She ran her hands underneath his shirt and quickly slipped it over his head. She bent to his breeches and stopped.

  “Ah, how do you remove them?” she asked sheepishly. She plucked idly at a button and lifted an eyebrow.

  He deftly undid the buttons and slid the breeches off his legs. He lay naked before her on the bed. She climbed on top of him, pressing her lovely flesh against his. The full effect of his arousal burned against her cool skin like a hot brand.

  Swiftly, he rolled her onto her back. Rising on one elbow, he stared deeply into her eyes. This time, it was not a dream. He wanted it to be real. He wanted her to want him, not the ghost of a dead husband. “Say it,” he insisted.

  “I want you,” she whispered. “I want you, Benjamin Campbell.”

  They kissed. It was not just a kiss of desire, for there was plenty of that between them. It was a joining of body and soul. They poured their hearts into every touch. They stood on the edge of an abyss between life and death, an abyss that they had faced separately in the past. Tonight, they would bridge the chasm together.

  His fingers began a slow exploration of her skin. He flicked the nipple of her right breast with his tongue, alternately kissing and suckling. He delicately brushed his fingertips over her goose-pimpled skin as he stroked her side and ran his hand down to her thighs. He ached with desire and felt her body rise to his touch. He loved the sound of her sweet moans.

  She slid her hand down his firm stomach and wrapped her fingers around the throbbing heat of him. He shivered with pleasure at her touch. She stroked him, ever so slowly. Her lips parted, her hot breath touching his cheek.

  He could not endure another moment. He lifted on top of her and buried himself deep inside her. He quivered at the warm, moist heat that enveloped him. When she wrapped her silky legs around him and pulled him deeper inside her, he thought his heart would burst.

  Benjamin moaned as Tilly’s hands slid down his back and firmly cupped his buttocks. He plunged faster and deeper, unable to get enough of her. He had replayed their first coupling in his mind so many times that it felt like a dream. This moment was real, and he wanted to savor every kiss, every touch, and every sweet sensation.

  He lifted himself onto his hands and looked down at her. She was absolutely breathtaking. Her hair fanned away from her face onto the pillow, and her porcelain skin glowed. Her lips were full and lusciously red from his kisses. They parted slightly as she licked her lower lip with the tip of her pink tongue. She stared back at him with hooded eyelids, her eyes dark with desire.

  “Benjamin,” she purred. She thrust upwards and moaned deeply.

  He closed his eyes. He could feel her squeezing him, pulling him deeper inside her. He involuntarily quickened his pace. While his mind wanted to move slowly, his body had other designs. Since their interlude in the forest, he awoke so many nights in a cold sweat. He had been haunted by a desire that was not sated. Now, his hunger for her finally would be satisfied.

  To him, it felt as if her body shared the same unmatched need. She matched him thrust for thrust. Her breasts brushed against his chest, deliciously torturing him.

  He was exceedingly thankful that the castle walls were several feet thick, for they were unable to silence the intensity of their passion. He felt her spasm over and over again when she exploded in ecstasy. “Benjamin!” she cried, arching her body against his.

  He could wait no longer. Overcome with bliss, he repeatedly cried her name. He shook violently at the exquisite release.

  At length, their breathing returned to a normal pace. He carefully slipped from her and moved to the side, where he scooped her into his arms. He smoothed her hair from her face. As he gazed into her eyes, his heart felt whole again.

  ∞

  Unlike their first encounter, they did not drift to sleep. Benjamin held her tightly, afraid the spell would be broken. They exchanged soft kisses and gentle caresses. It was a rare moment of peace that he hoped would not end.

  “Are you hurt, Tilly?” he finally inquired, inspecting the bruise upon her cheek.

  “It was very passionate, but I do not believe you injured me,” she teased, chuckling.

  He lifted onto one elbow and stared at her. His eyes lingered on the deepening bruise. “If you do not want to discuss what happened in the forest, I understand.” He lightly touched her cheek. “Just tell me you were not seriously harmed.”

  She looked away, though she snuggled closer to him. “How do you live with killing someone, Benjamin?” she asked.

  He sighed heavily. “I murdered someone. You defended the boys and yourself.” Stroking her back, he tried to console her. “You need not feel any shame for what you did.”

  “Someone died at my hand,” she argued. “I know he would have killed us – and yet, I cannot forget the feeling of the blade piercing his skin or the terrible look in his eyes.”

  She buried her face in his chest and wept uncontrollably. Benjamin held her while she let the pain seep from her body.

  When the tears began to ebb, he offered what little advice he had. “You will never forget what happened,” he said. “Killing is not who you are. It was an action you took to save lives. You did the right thing, even though it may not seem to be that way now.”

  “Can I stay here tonight?” she asked uncertainly. She did not look him in the eyes.

  He knew the question was not as simple as it seemed. Was he ready to trust her? Did he dare let her into his heart? He might never know the truth about how she came to be here. Did it matter?

  At last, he whispered, “Aye, lass. Where else would you go? This is where you belong.”

  Thirty Nine

  Tilly awoke to the sound of shuffling footsteps in the room. She squeezed Benjamin’s arm, but he did not awaken. Surely, the guards around the castle would have sounded the alarm if something was amiss. She trembled slightly and hoped no one was there to slaughter them.

  “Mistress, are you awake?” Mrs. Keith whispered, daring to crack the bed curtains ever so slightly.

  Relieved, Tilly exhaled. She pulled the bedcovers tighter to conceal her nakedness. “What are you doing here, Mrs. Keith?” she asked quietly.

  “It is near dawn, milady,” she said. She pointed toward the window. “If you wish to steal away to your room before the household awakens,
you must go now.”

  She dared not ask how Mrs. Keith knew she was in Benjamin’s room. She followed the housekeeper’s gaze and noticed the soft pink of the sky and first rays of sunshine chasing away the night. The servants would begin their work at any moment. Delay would lead to detection.

  Benjamin stirred beside her. “It is too early for propriety,” he mumbled. “Leave some clothes for Tilly, and bring us breakfast later. I will see that the lady is properly tended.”

  “Milord, someone will see her leaving your room,” Mrs. Keith gasped. “Think of milady’s reputation!”

  Tilly reluctantly freed herself from Benjamin’s embrace. “She is right,” she said, sliding to the edge of the bed. “I should go.”

  He sat upright and rubbed the sleep from his eyes like a little boy. “No, you should stay,” he replied. “To hell with everyone’s opinions!”

  She kissed him on the cheek. “I won’t start this relationship with rumors and innuendo.” She thought a moment and amended her statement, “Well, at least not more rumors and innuendo.”

  She hastily donned the nightgown that Mrs. Keith found in a ball beside the fireplace. They tiptoed out of the room, but not before hearing Benjamin violently curse the current social conventions.

  ∞

  When they returned to Tilly’s room, they found Sarah waiting for them. Tilly knew that her maid was well qualified to prepare her for the day. Still, Sarah followed Mrs. Keith’s instructions without comment. In no time at all, the ladies dressed Tilly in a black gown and seated her at the dressing table.

  “What is to be done about the bruise?” Sarah asked, surveying the angry splotch of purple and red along Tilly’s jawbone.

  Mrs. Keith produced a bag of cheesecloth from her pocket. Opening it carefully, she dipped her finger inside. She patted a white, powdery substance upon Tilly’s face. Noticing their quizzical looks, she said, “It is flour.”

  The women giggled. “It should get you through breakfast as long as you do not wipe your face,” Mrs. Keith said defensively. Her comment sent the women into a fit of laughter. Feigning frustration, she put her hands on her hips and protested, “We haven’t any face powder in the house, so what was I supposed to use?”

  When they sufficiently recovered from their mirth, Mrs. Keith continued her work. Tilly would have preferred concealer and wondered if it had been invented yet. She thought it might exist in the big cities, but then again, didn’t they put arsenic and other toxic chemicals in early cosmetics? Flour may have been a safer option after all.

  Inspecting her handiwork, Mrs. Keith seemed satisfied. “Now, let us discuss what happened,” she said, putting away her makeshift cosmetic.

  Tilly lowered her head. She did not wish to relive that terrible event.

  Sarah gently raised her chin and shook her head. “Milady, you should tell Mr. Campbell to summon the cobbler as soon as may be,” she said, in a serious tone. “Those slippers do not fit properly. You could have broken your neck!”

  Tilly glanced down at the crude slippers she wore on her feet. “Whatever do you mean?” she asked, confused. Her shoes were not the nicest pair she had ever worn but seemed to serve the purpose.

  “Your slippers were so loose that you slipped on the trail and fell down an embankment,” Mrs. Keith explained. “You got that nasty bruise on your face from the fall.”

  “Is that the story you are spreading?”

  “Oh, aye,” the housekeeper said, grinning broadly. “Mr. Murphy told the tale in the servant’s hall during the evening meal. When the words come from his lips, it is considered gospel. “

  Tilly’s eyes filled with tears. “Thank you,” she said. She squeezed Mrs. Keith’s hand and turned to Sarah, “You have both been so kind to me. Thank you so, so much.”

  “Milady, do not fret,” Sarah said, patting Tilly’s hand. “We will take care of you.”

  Those simple words warmed Tilly’s heart more than Sarah could know. Taking a deep breath, she struggled to keep the tears from flowing down her cheeks and turning Mrs. Keith’s floury concealer into a pasty mess.

  ∞

  Tilly smoothed her hair before entering the family dining room. They decided to leave it down this morning so that it could better conceal her bruise. While the official story seemed to quell most of the gossip, she was not inclined to be a spectacle.

  She was delighted to see the boys sitting with Benjamin at the table. They turned when she entered the room and greeted her with huge smiles. In unison, they bid her good morning.

  Benjamin guided her to a chair at the head of the table. He went to the sideboard and hastily prepared a heaping plate of food. As he placed it in front of her, he whispered in her ear, “You must be starving after last night.” He chuckled at the blush on her cheeks.

  He took a seat to her right. Michael grinned broadly at Angus but wisely held his tongue.

  Angus entertained them with a story about the frog he found two days ago. Apparently, he chased one of the maids around the garden, threatening to drop it down her dress. Michael howled with laughter at the tale.

  Tilly observed that Allan was very quiet, barely eating his food. She glanced at Benjamin who was also watching his son. They exchanged a look.

  “Allan, I wanted to take Mrs. Munro to the old ruins today,” Benjamin said. “Would you like to join us?”

  Angus and Michael cried in unison, “Can we come too?”

  “No.” He silenced the imminent protest with a look. “Will you go with us, Allan?”

  His eldest son nodded and asked to be excused so he could prepare for the trip. Benjamin dismissed him. The boy left the room, head bowed and looking very defeated.

  Tilly leaned forward. “He will be alright,” she whispered, gently placing her hand on top of his.

  He wrapped his hand around hers. They heard a small gasp from Michael and turned to see the boy staring at their hands.

  Benjamin winked at his son as he withdrew his hand. “I find it hard to believe that you did not join in the fun,” he said. “Tell me what wicked things you did.”

  Michael was not to be outdone by his brother. He proceeded to tell them about every bug and worm he found in the garden. His adventures dominated the conversation for the rest of the meal, offering a diversion from their concerns about Allan. Tilly hoped the trip to the ruins would lighten the boy’s mood. It broke her heart to see the child so devastated by what happened. No one deserved to carry that burden.

  Forty

  The old ruins were as advertised, crumbling stone walls of a former castle that were surrounded by a collection of cottages whose roofs long ago collapsed. Benjamin explained the area was the original seat to the Clan Campbell. It was abandoned in the 1600s after a fire destroyed half of the castle. The home they shared now was built to replace it.

  He pointed to a rock wall three stories tall. “At the top of that wall, you would have found sentries patrolling the battlements,” he said. “My ancestors had many enemies, the MacDonalds being the worst of the lot.”

  Allan snapped to attention. “Why?” he asked eagerly.

  Benjamin put his arm around his son’s shoulders. “They fought over property – cattle and land. Or perhaps someone would offend a member of the clan. Tempers ran high.” He added, “It did not take much to start a fight.”

  Tilly beckoned them to join her. She found a nice spot overlooking the castle and spread a blanket on the ground for their picnic.

  “The Campbells and MacDonalds have been enemies for centuries, son,” Benjamin continued as he sat close to Tilly. “Rest assured, though, what happened yesterday will be the last time our families fight.”

  “How can you be sure, Da? Will they not want revenge for the MacDonald’s death?”

  “They will not learn of his death. I promise you.”

  Allan frowned. “If he does not return, won’t they suspect something has happened?” he asked. He idly broke apart a piece of bread Tilly handed him. “He must have told someo
ne where he was going.”

  “Aye, he probably did. Richard MacDonald was not well liked, though. I suspect many will be most happy when he does not return.”

  “What do you mean?” Tilly interrupted.

  “He was a cruel man,” Benjamin said. “He charged exorbitant rents and had no qualms about turning out any tenant who could not pay, even in the dead of winter.” He shook his head in disgust. “He treated his own family with equal brutality. I heard that he beat his wife and son. His kin definitely will not send any search parties for the man.”

  “It seems so many people know the truth – Mr. Murphy, Mrs. Keith, Sarah, Daniel, and the guards who helped dispose of the body.” Tilly glanced nervously at Allan when she mentioned the nasty business of tidying up after their misadventure. “Can you trust them?”

  “Do not forget the families of the sentries who were killed,” Benjamin said. “They know the truth too. I only let the most trustworthy people near my family, Tilly. They will not betray me.”

  She realized his statement held special significance for her. She wished Allan was not there. She wanted to know if this meant he finally believed her. One look at Allan quelled further query.

  The boy struggled to process what his father told him. “Why did the MacDonald come here?” he finally asked.

  To Tilly’s surprise, Benjamin answered honestly, “Your grandfather and me killed his brother and sister.”

  Allan gasped in shock. “Why?” he asked. “Why would you kill someone, Da?”

  “They murdered your uncle. We wanted them to pay for the crime they committed. I was 16 years old. I followed your grandfather’s orders without question.” Placing his hand upon the boy’s shoulder, he said gravely, “When I think about that night, I now understand it was the wrong thing to do. I cannot change what I did, no matter how much I regret it. My actions brought this trouble to the family. I hope you can forgive me.” He looked at Tilly then, silently communicating the same apology.