Lovefool (Introduction)
Page 45
#44 CAN’T HELP FALLING IN LOVE
Although she walked with a little limp, she seemed to be better. She said him good night and closed the door of the room in which she slept last night. She laid down and closed her eyes. This day was very long and very complicated. She was deeply tired and she fell asleep soon. He came into her room when he was already sure that she was sleeping. Her hair was dispersed over a bolster making her look cute. She was dreaming something nice, because she sometimes smiled. He enjoyed watching her.
Later that night he left her shortly and went outside. He liked watching the sky and tonight it was almost cloudless. He stood at the veranda and looked up. There were millions of stars shining more or less brightly and this never changed. Whether he was in Scandinavia or in Africa, now or centuries ago, he always looked at the sky and felt great. This always gave him energy to carry on.
That is why he had a house outside of the city. The artificial lights made it impossible to watch stars and without seeing them above, he didn't feel well. He heard something moving and listened to the sounds. They were quite quiet. He recognized her hobbling steps. She was going downstairs without saying a word. She opened the front door and came out. She wasn't surprised to see him and kept silent. She came closer to him. She held a candle in her hand and blew it out when she came outside. Then she looked up, too. She loved to watch stars as well.
Mia’s red blanket covered her, but she was shivering a little. Nights in March can be quite cold. She didn't care about it. She was breathing regularly and smiled. Julian came one step closer without looking at her and rubbed her back to warm her up. She leant her head at his arm; she wasn't tall enough to lean it at his shoulder when he was standing. They didn't move for a while.
Stars are maybe blind, but they were shining in a wonderful way. You could see the Milky Way and every brilliant from above was sparkling. The moon was on the other side of the house, so the stars caught their whole attention.
She admired the stars, and also contemplated. She reacted spontaneously without thinking. But as she leant her head against him she got scared and insecure about her own behaviour. She didn't want to show him how important he had become for her, but she was tired, she was in a half-sleep and she wasn't able to control herself. He had a strong compact body and she needed support, because her leg started to hurt. She was shocked by her behaviour and it alerted her so much that she indeed perked up. Now it would be strange to step back and act like it never happened. However, he started it! He touched her back and almost pulled her slightly closer to him. In fact, she lost her balance and so she altered her position for a second. This was her analytical excuse, if anyone ever asked. However, it was great to stand close for a while. It felt in fact fantastic. He didn't push her away. He didn't move as if he didn't want to scare her and trigger a new reaction. He was obviously happy with this situation.
Mia felt then like Shakespeare’s Juliet: "So dear I love him that with him, all deaths I could endure. Without him, live no life”.