The Pretense (Men of Meadowfall Book 7)
Page 22
“Don’t you need to look?” Levi asked, nudging a menu at him.
“I always have the same thing.” Cole laughed. “The pork broth ramen. It’s the best.”
Levi looked thoughtful. “I might have to copy you, then.”
“You know my taste is the best in the world.”
Levi rolled his eyes.
“Hey, I picked you, so you know it’s good.” Cole grinned when Levi cracked a smile.
Cole turned his attention to Levi, switching between telling dirty jokes and dry ones to keep that smile on Levi’s face. It felt good, knowing he could make his omega grin like that.
Micah stepped over to the table while they were both chuckling. And then Cole felt like a shitty person, because they were here to apologize to Micah, or do something other than giggle.
He sighed. “Crap. That wasn’t how I was intending to meet you. Sorry.”
Cole stood to shake Micah’s hand, Levi following suit. Micah hesitated. He cracked a smile, though.
“That’s fine,” Micah said, returning the handshake. “I’d much rather see you both smiling. You always pull such long faces when you meet me.”
Levi winced. “But you—” he lowered his voice “—but you’re envious of me, aren’t you?”
Well, that wasn’t how Cole would’ve opened the conversation. Levi cringed immediately after, and so did Micah.
Micah took a while to answer. He sat carefully down in his seat, his movements a little stiff with the scar tissue and walking stick. “Well... I can’t lie about that,” he said. But before Levi could react, Micah added, “That’s on me, though. It’s not something you should feel responsible for.”
“You don’t resent me?” Cole blurted.
Micah met his eyes, horrified. “Gods, no. I’ve told you a million times before, Cole. It was an accident.”
“But you’re not happy,” Levi said.
There was that. Cole sighed. “I still feel responsible. If I hadn’t set off those fireworks with the kids, the fire wouldn’t have happened.”
For a moment, there was a faraway look in Micah’s eyes. Then he smiled crookedly. “I’ve known you far longer than just the accident, Cole. Levi’s talked about you from the first time I hired him, what, twelve years ago? You’re almost like family to me.”
“Except York still hates my guts,” Cole said.
Micah sighed. “York lost his precious collection of toy cars in that fire. It was important to him. I’m just glad he wasn’t hurt.”
Cole winced. Yeah, he’d never really apologized as much to Micah’s son. He probably should.
“I’ll admit that I envy what you have with Levi,” Micah said, smiling wanly. “It’s something precious. Treasure it.”
“But what about you?” Levi said. “Cole and I want to help—”
“And you’ve helped plenty.” Micah looked pointedly at them. “You’ve come to visit me, and Cole’s tried to cover up paying for York’s childcare over the years.”
Cole squawked, blushing. All this time... Micah knew? “You weren’t supposed to find out!”
Micah laughed. Levi glanced at Cole, his eyes soft. So maybe it wasn’t so bad that Micah knew, if it made Levi look at Cole like that.
“I was just trying to help,” Cole muttered, his cheeks warm.
“Like I said, you’ve helped enough.” Micah smiled, his expression kind, even if he had angry red scars mottling his skin. “Mostly, I’m disappointed and angry with myself. That’s not your fault.”
Levi looked dismayed—exactly how Cole felt. Cole didn’t wish disappointment and anger on Micah. “That’s my fault,” he said.
“Mine,” Levi said.
Micah sighed exasperatedly. “No. It’s neither of your faults. Stop that.”
Then he struggled to his feet, fumbling with his walking stick. Cole winced, stepping over to help. But Micah just pulled him into a hug.
“It’s okay,” Micah said, rubbing his back. “I’m old and I don’t need any pity. I forgive you both.”
Cole swallowed his guilt. “You’re not that old.”
Micah chuckled. “I’m too old for more children, but I guess that’s okay.”
Going by the look in Micah’s eyes, though... he looked like he would’ve liked more babies. Micah deserved an alpha, someone who would treasure him and look out for him, someone who could help bear his burdens. It couldn’t be Cole, and Micah had already turned down the alphas Cole pointed toward him.
“If there’s anything I can do to help...” Cole trailed off.
“I’ll make sure to ask,” Micah told him. “But I am capable.”
Levi came around to sandwich Micah in a group hug, meeting Cole’s eyes. “Definitely tell us if you need anything, Micah,” Levi said.
Cole stroked Levi’s side, patting Micah on the back. He thought about Gran’s words. That Micah would have to seek his own happiness, instead of having Cole be responsible for it.
After years of believing it was something he had to do, himself... It still felt like an alien concept.
“We fought over that accident so many times,” Cole said wryly. “Levi and I. We both tried to take responsibility for it, except there were all these things we couldn’t resolve.”
Micah winced. “Levi told me. I’m just glad you’ve both seen past that, you know? You had to move on with your lives. There’s more than just the accident.”
“But you need to tell yourself that, too,” Levi said, kissing Micah’s cheek. “There’s more to you than your scars.”
“Touché.” Micah chuckled. “I’ll get over it.”
“I hope you will.” Levi looked worried. “Cole still has nightmares of it.”
Cole winced. That was something Micah didn’t need to know.
“Even now?” Micah met Cole’s eyes. “Please remember that I don’t blame you. If there’s one thing you take away from today, that has to be it. I wish I could bear your pain, Cole. I want you and Levi to be happy. That means moving on from the accident.”
Cole breathed out, releasing Micah. He wants me not to blame myself. “You don’t have to.”
“I want to,” Micah said, patting Cole’s hand. “I’d much rather you focus on Levi. Levi needs you. I’ll find my way around.”
At first, Cole thought maybe Micah was just saying something he thought Cole needed to hear. But Micah looked at him steadfastly, and Cole realized... that maybe it really was okay for him to let the accident go. For him not to hold himself to a wound, to Micah’s happiness, or anything like that.
“I’ll focus on Levi,” Cole said, bowing his head. “It’s gonna take time, but I’ll remember to move on. And if at any point, you need assistance...”
“I have a young man to depend on too, you know.” Micah grinned. “York’s grown up well. I trust him. And you too, Levi. Move on from the accident. I’ll live.”
Micah looked hard at Levi, until Levi bowed his head.
“I’ll try,” Levi said. “It’ll be difficult.”
“But promise me you’ll do it,” Micah said. “I don’t want to be the reason you can’t move on in life.”
“I promise. I hope you’ll find the very best alpha in the world,” Levi said earnestly. Then he glanced at Sam in the kitchen and added, “Well, maybe two alphas. Maybe that’ll help you even more.”
Micah laughed. Cole cracked a smile, relieved.
This had gone better than he’d hoped. And maybe... there was hope for all of them. For Levi and Cole, and for Micah, who still had his future ahead of him.
“WE’RE GOING BACK to the mansion?” Levi asked a month later, peering out the windshield at the darkening sky. “Did we leave something there the last time? Or does Gran want something cleaned up?”
“How about neither?” Cole grinned, watching from the corner of his eye as Levi turned toward him in confusion.
“But why...”
Cole waited. It had been a long time coming. Since he’d gotten the keys from Gran, he’d been dr
opping by the mansion, setting things up. He wanted everything to be perfect.
Levi hadn’t suspected a thing, either, when Cole had spent a couple hours here and there, making sure the lights turned on when he wanted them to.
When they approached the tall iron gates, Levi glanced at them. And then did a double-take.
Past the gates, gold fairy lights covered the bushes leading the way to the mansion. There had to be thousands of them. And at the end of the driveway, the mansion had been lit up, too, bathed in a warm golden glow against the night sky.
“Wait,” Levi said, leaning forward in his seat. The gate opened when the car approached, and Levi’s eyes grew wider as he stared at the fairy lights skimming by. “Is there... some sort of party here? I don’t hear any music.”
“There was one,” Cole said, grinning. “Remember the time Gran invited the whole family over? I don’t know who was there, but I think there were your cousins and your aunts and uncles, and so many people in the pool.”
Levi broke into a smile. “I remember. Everyone was so distracted by the rainbow lights in the pool, and the courtyard was empty.”
“And you said it was such a pity,” Cole added. “So you dragged me there.”
“I’d spilled fruit punch down my shirt,” Levi said. “I had to wash my shirt, and then it was wet and I was cold.”
“So I gave you my shirt.”
Levi laughed. “You were shirtless the rest of the night. I mean, not that I was complaining.”
Cole coughed lightly. “Yeah, you couldn’t take your eyes off my chest. I had to tell you my eyes were up here.”
Levi snorted, nudging him. “I can’t believe Gran threw that party for my sixteenth birthday.”
“She loves you. Of course she would.” Cole parked the car next to the front steps. Then, before Levi could get out, Cole jogged over, opening the door for him.
Levi made a face. “I’m fine, Cole. Just pregnant. And it’s just six months, at that.”
“That’s enough of a reason.” Cole wrapped his arm around Levi’s waist, sliding his other hand down Levi’s belly. At six months, Levi’s belly was half the size of a basketball, and he was eating more, putting on more weight. Cole couldn’t get enough of touching him.
Somewhere in Levi’s belly, Bryce kicked. Cole’s heart skipped.
“Gods, did you feel that?” Cole beamed; Levi laughed.
“You’re always so excited when he kicks.”
“Well, yeah. It’s our baby!” It felt like his smile might split his face, but Cole didn’t care. He helped Levi up the front steps, opening the front door.
“Wait, I still don’t know why we’re here. There isn’t a party right now.” Levi frowned, glancing around the empty foyer.
Cole touched Levi’s belly again. Then, because Levi was so close, and because he was beautiful and pregnant and so very lovely, Cole pressed Levi against the wall, dropping kisses all over his face.
Levi’s eyes fluttered shut; he tipped his face up, his pink lips pulling into a smile. “Wait. This is exactly how I conceived Bryce, Cole. Don’t tell me—”
“Nah, I’m not gonna fuck you right now.” Cole grinned, kissing Levi slow and sweet, just savoring Levi’s breath, his soft tongue, the way he opened so readily for Cole. “There’s other things we need to be doing.”
“Things like what?” Levi asked breathlessly when Cole broke the kiss.
Cole ran his thumb across Levi’s damp lower lip, sliding his arm around Levi’s waist. “I don’t think we looked at the spiral stairs when we were living here. Did you?”
Levi frowned. “I think I was too busy moving in. But I remember those stairs—remember the time we were playing Catch, and I was running down the stairs and I just slipped? And I fell the rest of the way. And I lost one of my contact lenses.”
Cole’s stomach squeezed. “Gods, no more of that for you. Don’t even think about it.”
“I was squinting so much looking for my missing contacts, I bumped my head into your butt. That’s what a headbutt is, isn’t it?” Levi laughed.
Cole grinned, flipping on the light switches. The spiral stairs had been built for servants long ago, but they’d been well-maintained, polished cherrywood spiraling through the floors of the mansion.
Cole led Levi to the widest part of the stairs, made sure Levi held on tight to the railing, and then placed himself right behind his omega, ready to catch him if Levi so much as slipped.
“I can climb the stairs, you know,” Levi said dryly.
Cole rubbed Levi’s ass. “I’m enjoying the view from here.”
“Figures.” But there was a smile in Levi’s voice. He climbed the stairs slowly, Cole keeping a steady palm on him the whole way, retracing the steps they’d taken in this mansion as children.
“So... we’re here to reminisce about the old days?” Levi asked when they reached the landing.
“Maybe?” Cole grinned.
He took Levi through the mansion, up to the third floor, peeking into dusty rooms they hadn’t touched during their stay here. At the balcony of the master bedroom, Levi looked down at the sprawling land beneath them—the dim courtyard, the rainbow lights pulsing gently in the pool.
“It’s such a big space,” Levi murmured, his gaze lingering on the cobblestone courtyard. “We’ve done so much here.”
They’d spent... days and weeks and months of their lives in this place—as teenagers, as adults.
“I’m just glad I had the chance to do them all with you,” Cole said, nuzzling Levi’s shoulder. “Remember your shoe broke when you were pulling me over to the courtyard? At your birthday party.”
Levi huffed. “I tossed both my shoes. And you ditched yours, too.”
“Well, I wasn’t about to crush your toes.”
Levi smiled, his gaze faraway. “I’d like to do that again,” he said. “In the courtyard.”
Cole’s heart skipped. Because that was where he’d intended for the evening to end. “Yeah? Right now?”
“Now,” Levi said, his eyes lighting up. “I can’t believe we haven’t before this.”
“We didn’t have the chance.”
Cole tried to keep his excitement down. There was something important in his pocket, something he’d taken pains to conceal from Levi since it arrived at their apartment.
He turned Levi away from the balcony railings, trying not to hurry Levi through the mansion. Didn’t want to give things away. But it was so difficult, when Cole wanted to be out in the open air, holding his omega.
And then they were stepping through the backdoor, the full moon shining down on them, glinting off the smooth surfaces of the cobblestone.
“Shoes on this time,” Cole said dryly. “I don’t want you to catch a chill.”
“This isn’t like last time,” Levi said, grinning.
They’d jumped into the pool after their courtyard dance the last time. Levi had come down with a cold. Cole had made him soups and brought Levi his homework, and that had been special, too.
Cole brought Levi’s hand to his lips now, kissing his knuckles. “Damn right it won’t be the same this time.”
This time... He had plans for something more.
With their hands linked, Cole brought his omega all the way to the middle of the courtyard, the trees shadowy around them, the night breeze curling around their bare arms.
“What song are we dancing to?” Levi asked, looking around with a smile.
“Doesn’t matter to me,” Cole said, his heart tripping. “Any song is fine.”
“What about Those Good Old Days?” Levi hummed the beginning notes of the song, an old piece they’d heard on the radio back when they were in middle school.
“You still remember that one?” Cole teased. But he took Levi through a slow waltz around the courtyard, one step at a time, holding Levi steady to keep him from stumbling.
It spoke of trust, Levi following Cole through the movements, their bodies remembering the motions of a long-ago danc
e. They danced slowly, on and on, until Levi closed his eyes, letting Cole guide him wherever.
Then the lights around the courtyard came on—thousands of gold fairy lights perched on the trees, draped between ornate lampposts, surrounding the entire square.
Cole smiled, still guiding Levi through the waltz, waiting for Levi to open his eyes. “Do you remember what I said to you here? When we danced.”
One day, I’m gonna marry you.
Levi wet his lips, smiling. “You said a lot of things.”
“Any you remember?”
“You said I looked beautiful. You were glad our teacher canceled that pop quiz.”
Cole laughed. “What else?”
“You said... that I smelled like yours. And also... you... you said you were going to marry me.”
Cole’s heart skipped. You remembered.
Levi’s eyelashes began to flutter, like he was trying not to open his eyes. “Don’t tell me you forgot that,” he said teasingly.
“I haven’t,” Cole murmured.
“Wait,” Levi said, his breath hitching. “You...”
“Look at me,” Cole whispered.
Levi opened his eyes, meeting Cole’s gaze. But he couldn’t help glancing at the fairy lights—all those little pinpoints of light around them, illuminating the place. “Cole—” Levi croaked, his eyes growing wide. He slowed to a stop then, his surprise causing him to stumble.
Cole caught Levi safely in his arms, drawing him close. “You like?”
“You... you did all this?” Levi breathed, following the swathes of fairy lights with his eyes. “Wh—Why...”
“‘Cuz there was something I wanted to ask you,” Cole whispered, kissing Levi’s ear.
Levi turned to stare at Cole, his eyes hopeful and disbelieving, his breaths coming in quick, shallow puffs.
And now Cole was suddenly nervous. What if Levi decided that they weren’t ready for marriage yet?
Cole cleared his throat, reaching into his pocket. Couldn’t stop his hands from shaking a little.
He made sure Levi was steady on his feet. Then he knelt, pulling the rings from his pocket. Caught Levi’s hand and pressed the rings into his palm, closing Levi’s fist over them.