MONAD 12.21.12

by T. Anderson

  “Vern, you need to accept this. It’s not going to change—ever. Will you help me or not?”

  “I don’t know, Stella. You have no idea what you’re talking about. It’s not as easy as you think it’ll be.”

  “I never said it would be easy.” She paused and grabbed his hand in hers. She didn’t care what anyone would think who might be watching. He was her Vern. He always was and he always would be. Her touch, the sensation of her skin on his, was the catalyst that convinced Vern to comply.

  “Stella, you know I would do anything for you. I—I just…”

  “It’s okay, Vern. I know. Listen to me. I want you to know I was wrong to push you away before. I know that now. We were always meant to be together. I’m sorry. Nothing else matters. This job I need to do, we can do it together. Me and you. Just like we were supposed to all along.” Although what she was saying sounded cryptic, he understood.

  “All right, Stella. We’ll do it together. But the plan must be tight. Rock solid. I won’t allow you to take any unnecessary risks. Understand?” He pulled his hand from hers. “Good plans take time to perfect. We’re going to have to keep up this charade—no public affection—until it’s safe. Okay?” It killed him to say that. He wanted nothing more than to wind his arms around her and take away her pain. Her touch was like a drug to him. It was hard to resist, especially now that she would give it so freely.

  “Yes. I understand.” She felt a pang of rejection now. She longed for his embrace, but shrugged it off to focus on the task at hand. “My immediate goal is to devise a plan. I’ll have to attend a few classes to avoid suspicion, without anyone from MONAD snooping around and getting in my business. It should buy us some time. Can we meet up later this week?”

  “Just call me on my cell and I’ll be there. No questions asked. If you need anything...” His voice drifted off before he realized something else. “I should tell you that I’ve spoken to Petra off and on over the years. She may be an asset to us as well.”

  “Really?” Stella was honestly surprised. She had always questioned Petra’s motives. “I’ll have to think about that. Do you trust me, Vern?”

  “I trust you, Stella. I believe your wisdom far exceeds your physical age. You just need to tap into it. I know you will. Call me if you need me.”

  They parted. The gears were beginning to turn. The week went on, business as usual. Stella filled her prescription for the pain medication. It seemed to help. At least she was able to concentrate. She and Aron went to their classes, although she wasn’t paying any attention and didn’t care in the least what happened in them. She spent the class time jotting down ideas, scribbling possible schemes in her notebook. She began to record everything, including her thoughts and unanswered questions. A name kept popping up. One in particular and although she tried to ignore it, there was a bad vibe that kept rising to the surface when she pondered the person. Gunnar Erickson, her biological father. There was something about his behavior that didn’t seem as squeaky clean as he portrayed himself to be. She knew that Aron worshipped her parents and would freak out if she tried discussing it with her. Stella kept her thoughts to herself. She was sure she could figure it out on her own. She just needed more time. She traced his name in her notebook and drew question marks all around it. Stella was certain there was more to him that she still needed to learn.

  14

  Help

  Verner Hanson was a troubled man. It was amazing that he hadn’t already gone off the deep end. For days he fretted over what to do about Stella. How could this be happening—again? He’d agreed to help with her plan to destroy Erling Steinar and MONAD, and he was genuinely interested in doing it. He would love to see that asshole burn. But he spent a lot of time on something that was much more important. How could he save Stella? And this time, do things right?

  There were only a few options. He could ask Gunnar and Cybele for help. This didn’t seem like the best thing to do. He wasn’t sure they could give him what he needed. So he decided to go with the other option—Petra Steinar. There was a slim chance that she’d be willing to work with him. He didn’t want to make any rash decisions this time, so he thought good and hard about it before contacting her. When he felt sure that he was thinking clearly, he made the call.

  Petra asked without delay, “What’s going on? Is there a problem?”

  “That depends on what you consider a problem. I think this is something you’ll be concerned with.”

  “Is it Stella?” she asked, pointedly.

  “Yes.”

  Her voice now softer, she asked, “Is it happening?”

  “Is what happening?”

  “Is she sick, Vern?” It was more of statement rather than a question.

  “Yes. She is. How did you know?”

  “Nobody here ever wanted to accept this possibility, but I could have predicted long ago that it was going to happen.”

  “Interesting. Why did you never mention it to me?”

  “I couldn’t be sure. I was waiting, hoping and praying that it wouldn’t happen. Is it cancer?”

  “Yes.”

  “In her brain?”

  “Yeah.” The depression was threatening to break in his voice. He held back. Only a sigh escaped his lips.

  “When did you find out?”

  “A few days ago. She had a seizure. Gunnar took her to a specialist—one of their guys. He found it.”

  “And? What’s being done?”

  “She’s refusing treatment. I—” He stalled, debating whether he should divulge any more information.

  “What, Vern? Just tell me. I know you don’t fully trust me. I understand that. But if there’s something I should know…”

  “Where are you? Where’s Erl? Are you alone?”

  “Of course I’m alone. He’s working late again. He always works late. This line is secure. Vern, you need to know that I would not jeopardize Stella’s safety at any cost. She was my sister, for God’s sake! I realize there are people here who would love nothing more than to get ahold of her and do terrible, horrible things to her. But I am not one of them. “

  “I know. I do trust you. Petra, I can’t tell you everything. But I need to know if—if there is any chance—with Aeon. I know it’s a long-shot. What can you tell me?”

  “Oh, Vern. You are not seriously thinking about it, are you? You know you can’t do it alone. The chances of success are so very slim. The risks are astronomical. Do you even have a portal?”

  “No. I know. But Petra, listen to me. If there is any chance that it could work, I think we should try.”

  “Does Stella know how you feel about it?”

  “She doesn’t want to try. She wants to end it.”

  “She’s a smart girl, Vern. You should listen to her.”

  “Yeah. I know. I just can’t give up on her, Pet. How can you?”

  “Some things aren’t meant to be, Vern. This should be your proof. You can’t change nature’s path for anyone. You see what happens? It just won’t work.”

  “Just think about it, okay?”

  “I’ve thought about it. It’s not happening. But I want to talk to you about something else, Vern.”

  “What else? What’s going on?”

  “It’s Erling.”

  “Surprise, surprise. Have you finally decided to turn away from him?”

  “I was never ‘with’ him, Vern. You should know that by now.”

  “So?”

  “Someone has got to put a stop to this. He’s killing people, Vern. He’s walking around projecting this…Napoleonic image to the public. But in truth, he’s more Machiavellian than anyone sees.”

  “I know. He’s a sick bastard. You married him. What do you want me to do about it?”

  “I’ve thought about going to the authorities but it’s pointless. MONAD is too powerful, too big. The most they’ll do is slap his wrist and look the other way. And when Erl discovers that I’ve leaked the information, he’ll have me killed. Then he’ll go
to work on her.”

  “Tell me something I don’t already know.”

  “What about the Fifth Circle? Can they help? Are they strong enough?”

  “Maybe. There’s been some talk. Gunnar has Erl in his sights. I think his biggest priority right now, though, is Stella. I don’t think he’d wage war at this time. So if you’re asking me to dig a little, I’ll think about it.”

  “I’ll think about it if you’ll think about it. How’s that?”

  “Deal,” Vern agreed.

  “Please, Vern, keep me notified of Stella’s condition? I’m sure she’ll hide this from me as long as she possibly can. She doesn’t trust me at all. Can’t say I blame her. And keep an eye out for Myra. She’s bound to show up there again soon.”

  “I will, Petra. Let’s stay in contact.”

  “Be safe, Vern. And don’t do anything stupid. Use your brain this time.”

  “Right.” He disconnected the call. He wasn’t sure if he’d accomplished anything that he’d intended, but at least he’d gained a bargaining chip. Petra had access to state-of-the-art facilities for Aeon, and she wanted the same thing that Stella wanted—the fall of Erling Steinar. If he could find a way to deliver it to both of them, he’d buy himself a chance to save Stella. He didn’t know how he was going to get to that point, but he needed to get Stella to Minnesota and convince her to undergo the procedure. It wouldn’t be simple. He could use some further assistance.

  At that point, Vern knew he needed to approach Gunnar. He hated asking for his help; it made him feel helpless and lacking. Oh how he wished he had the strength to fight his own battles. But alas, that was the story of his life, always the follower. He would have to struggle to maintain any amount of control through this. It had been a week since Stella told him about the tumor. He should phone Gunnar, even if it was to discuss that. He made the call.

  “Gunnar, you free to talk?”

  “O’ course, Vern, o’ course,” he answered, his voice cool and confident.

  “I heard about Stella. I’m sorry, Gunnar. Please tell Cybele for me as well. I don’t know what to say.”

  “Thanks, man. I’ll tell her. You okay?” It was impressive how he could be so concerned for everyone but himself, so selfless.

  “Yeah. I’m fine. It hasn’t been easy, Gun. For me either, you know. I just wish there was something we could do.” He waited for a response. He would gauge Gunnar’s reaction.

  “Me too, Vern, me too. You just can’t mess with nature, man. The universe has a plan for us all, right?”

  Vern’s heart sank. He was hoping for a sign, some hint of interest from Gunnar that he might be interested in saving Stella like he, himself, was. “Right,” Vern answered.

  There was a moment of silence between them both.

  “Gun, can I ask you something?”

  “Sure, man, shoot.”

  “How serious are you—about Erl? I mean, about bringing him down? Does the Circle have anything planned? You know I want that prick to pay for what he’s doing.”

  “Woah, Vern, buddy! Easy. I know, we all want him stopped. We’re working on it. Right now, we’re all just focused on Stella. She’s been through a tremendous amount of stress. We don’t know how much time she’s got, and she deserves some peace. I think she’s earned it. Right?”

  “Yeah, of course. Sorry. I—I’m just pissed, you know. She’s your daughter, Gunnar. But she was my wife. My wife!” His voice escalated. He didn’t care what Gunnar thought. Good. Maybe he’d be taken more seriously.

  “It’s okay, Vern. You have every right to be angry. But let’s just focus on Stella for now. She needs support from all of us. We’ll deal with Erl later. All right, man?”

  “Yeah. Okay, Gunnar. I gotta go. Give my best to Cybele.”

  “Sure thing, bud. Let’s get together soon. Okay?”

  “Okay.” Vern hung up. Again, like the one he’d had with Petra, he wasn’t sure if this conversation would amount to anything meaningful. But at least he knew where he stood. The Fifth Circle wasn’t prepared to do anything right now. He couldn’t count on Gunnar for help. He couldn’t just come right out and tell him that Stella was preparing to attack MONAD whether the Circle was ready or not; Gunnar would blow a gasket. And in some ways, Vern didn’t want the interference anyway. Stella had come to him. She needed him. They were a team. He wasn’t about to let anyone come in and take that away from him. Why couldn’t he find a way to do this on his own?

  15

  Meditation

  Aron waited patiently after Vern’s lecture to speak privately with him. She needed someone to confide in. She shuffled her feet, tapped the books she had clutched to her chest and chewed her lip as he answered questions from other students. He noticed her out of the corner of his eye and smiled politely to the last student that exited the room. His look immediately changed to concern.

  “What is it, Aron?”

  “It’s Stella. She’s been acting…weird.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She hasn’t been to class in over a week. She only leaves the room to go to the bathroom. She probably wouldn’t even eat if Dane and I didn’t force her.”

  “Is she ill? Should we take her to a doctor?”

  No, no. She looks fine. She’s just…”

  “What? She’s just what?” Vern’s patience was growing thin. He wasn’t a mind reader.

  “She’s been in a constant state of—meditation.”

  “What?” He was confused. The girl was just diagnosed with a terminal disease and she was taking the time to meditate? And then his next concern was her safety. “Have you told anyone else about this?”

  “No. Just Dane and I know about it. Petra called once, but Stella hasn’t answered her phone.”

  “What about your dad? Have you told him?”

  “I wasn’t sure what to do…no. I haven’t told him.”

  “Good.” Although his last question sounded suspicious, Aron’s didn’t look surprised.

  “Professor Hanson, if she’s not going to class, someone’s going to notice. Shouldn’t we do something? What if people in Minnesota find out?”

  “You’re absolutely right, Aron. Come on, let’s go. I need to see her to make sure she’s okay.” He had visions of Myra Hadrian and her gang of MONAD thugs showing up at any second to stir up trouble. He stuffed some papers and his laptop into his bag and they hurried out of the building.

  When Aron unlocked the door to their room, Dane was sitting quietly on her bed, reading. He looked like a babysitter watching a sleeping child. He nodded at them and then his eyes turned to Stella who was sitting on the floor. She had on an oversized sweatshirt with the hood pulled up over her head. Her hands were connected somewhere inside the wide sleeves that rested gently in her lap. She was wearing fuzzy striped socks and her legs were crossed in the lotus pose. Her posture was picture perfect and her face was as still as a statue. You could hear her slow, rhythmic breathing, which was not interrupted by their arrival. Vern stared at her in disbelief.

  “Any change?” Aron asked Dane in a hushed voice.

  “Nope. She hasn’t moved all day.” It was three o’clock in the afternoon.

  Vern cautiously moved closer and stooped down in front of her. “Stella?” he whispered. When there was no response, he said it again, a little louder, in a normal voice. “Stella? Can you hear me? It’s Vern.”

  Stella’s eyelids barely quivered. Then suddenly her eyes popped open, while the rest of her body remained still. “Hello,” was all she said in a cool, eerily pleasant voice.

  Aron jumped at the opportunity. “Stella, let’s get you to the bathroom, okay? And have a drink of water. I bet you’re thirsty.” She guided Stella by her elbow into a standing position and led her out of the room and down the hall, leaving Vern perplexed on one knee.

  “This is absurd! What the hell is she doing?” Vern generically asked, partially to himself and partially to Dane, who was sitting on the bed shaking his head. “Sh
e’s like a zombie. “ He rose and started pacing the small space. “If she’s not in class and she’s not answering her phone, they’re going to find out…if they haven’t already. Petra won’t be able to stop them. They’ll be here soon, if they’re not already here or on their way. God! What are we going to do? Think, Vern, think!” he ordered himself. The logical part of his brain suggested taking her to a professional, a doctor. Another part of him wanted to stick to his plan, hang on and get her safely back to Minnesota. He needed to find out what she was up to with this meditation.

  A few minutes later, the girls returned to find Vern and Dane packing a bag for Stella. “Only take a few things. We’ll need some of her stuff here. Dane, take her out to my car. Aron, stay here with me, we need to talk.” He handed Dane his keys and Aron passed Stella off to Dane. Stella was on another planet, just doing what she was told.

  When they were alone, Vern sat Aron down on her bed. “Aron. There’s only one way this is going to work. You understand?”

  “I know, Professor Hanson.”

  “You know?” Somehow this didn’t surprise him.

  “You want me to pretend I’m Stella, right?”

  “Do you think you can?”

  “MmmHmm. I can. I have to.”

  “Have Dane help you cut your hair. Use her clothes. Whatever you need to do. Go to as many of her classes as you can in the next few days. But go to a few of your own too. Okay?” His voice bounced between frantic and dead calm. “You’ll have her phone. Answer it. Do the best you can. Got it?”

  “What about them?”

  He knew whom she meant. “You’ll have to improvise. I don’t have much time. I have to go. Call me if you need anything.”

  “Where are you taking her?”

  “Remember the room on campus from the first day we met? She’ll be safer there, at least until we decide what to do next.” He patted her shoulder and blew out of the room. Aron took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She didn’t open them until Dane was at the door.

  “They’re gone. Aron? You okay? “

  “Do you think we did the right thing?” she asked Dane.