Faith in Rayne

by Dannie Marsden

  “Thanks a lot. Really, how in the hell do I get myself out of this mess? Ya know I really didn’t know what the hell I was doin’ when I took to her bed. Ya know when I came here it was to make a better life for my family, to expand my ranch. I took this job, cuz I needed the work, and I figured that folks would maybe open up to me. And they did, ya know, I actually started makin’ friends, more than just Harry and Etta. Then one day I go and get shot. I wake up to realize that I cain’t remember shit, and I’m sleepin’ with that redheaded devil. Next thing I know, all hell’s breakin’ loose when Lisbet opened my door. I remembered her and things start to fall into place and make sense.”

  “Like what things.” Hawks swung his feet off the desk and leaned forward.

  “I’d have these images of this blonde and a ranch and dreams. God, I’d have these dreams and in them I was so damned happy. I could remember us laughin’ and livin’ this perfect life, ya know? I felt this peace that I cain’t even begin to describe.

  “I took one look at her standin’ outside that door and knew everything I ever wanted in life was about to walk outta my life, because I’d messed up and allowed that snake to slither into my bed. Now, every time Lisbet comes into town, Maddie is hurling insults at her or insinuating things that ain’t true.”

  “Always did think that Maddie would bring a shit load a trouble for anyone who decided to get involved with her. Always seemed to be a tad high strung, too possessive for my tastes. Hell, I reckon that goes for all the guys around these parts.” Hawks laughed as he said the last part. “Sorry to say, Rayne, I’m thinkin’ the only way you’re gonna be free of that one, is for her to either mosey on from here or you do. And I’d hate for you to be the one.”

  Rayne pushed away from her desk. “Not goin’ anywhere, except for supper this evenin’ with Lisbet and my son. I’m gonna make my rounds and make sure I’m caught up on my work here and head out for what I’m hopin’ will be a fine evenin’.”

  “Alright, just keep clear of that redhead, ya hear?”

  “That’s my plan boss.”

  †

  Maddie waltzed into the saloon. She put a sway to her hips and a bigger smile on her face for the few men who whistled and cheered at her, but she was fuming inside. How dare Rayne take that woman’s word over hers? And then to yank her around by her arm into the sheriff’s office and threaten to toss her into a jail cell. Maddie was livid at that treatment. Oh you’ll pay for that blondie, just you wait and see. She continued to smile and flirt with the men.

  Rebecca watched as Maddie made her way around the room. She made certain she was available to speak to the woman when she approached the bar for drinks.

  “That was quite the display out there,” Rebecca said in a friendly and calm voice.

  “Wasn’t it? I just can’t tell ya how shocked I was at that woman’s behavior.” Maddie placed her hand over her heart and a look of shock slipped onto her face.

  Rebecca reached out and placed a hand on Maddie’s arm as she leaned closer. “What happened? I mean, I’m sitting in here then all of a sudden people are shoutin’ about a fight outside. Can ya imagine my surprise when I see that you’re involved?”

  Maddie was eager to tell her spin on the events that led to her street brawl. “Oh my, I’m just so shaken! I was standin’ there talkin’ to folks outside, when she saw me and just started to shout such horrible things at me. And with her son in tow! I just can’t…” Maddie added a shake to her voice and hand.

  Had Rebecca not known the woman as well as she did, she would have fallen for the act. Playing along, Rebecca placed a hand to her heart and gasped, “Oh my, how horrible. Am I correct that the deputy stepped between the two of you?”

  “Yes, she did and…” Maddie looked around her as if she was about to say something secret. “Rayne is such a sweet woman, I know she wouldn’t want everyone to know how worried about me she was, but she escorted me to the sheriff’s office just to make sure I was alright. And to make sure that evil woman had left town before I came back here. I tell ya, I am truly afraid for my life.”

  “Oh my, I can’t imagine.” Rebecca saw Hawks walk into the saloon. “Well, honey, I know you’re safe now, and I see some thirsty men waitin’ for them drinks and your attention. Young Billy over there is lookin’ like a love-sick puppy. You best go put the boy outta his misery,” she said with a smile.

  “That poor boy, I suppose he deserves some attention.” Maddie turned to look at the young man, who indeed looked at her like a lost puppy. With a chuckle, she winked at him then touched Rebecca’s arm. “Thank you for caring about my safety.”

  “Of course, honey, us girls have to stick together.” Rebecca thought for sure her sarcasm was clearly heard.

  Hawks walked towards Rebecca, watching Maddie walk away. “So what’s she sayin’?”

  “Oh, you wouldn’t believe me if I told ya.”

  “Knowin’ her, yeah, I would.” Hawks motioned for a glass from the busy barkeep.

  “How’s Rayne?” Rebecca asked, concern clearly in her voice.

  “Regrettin’ the day she met Maddie and surprisingly in a good mood, considerin’ her wife was just in a catfight. Seems they’re havin’ supper this evenin’, and she’s really excited. Let’s just hope that one will leave well enough alone for the moment.”

  “That’s good to hear. I’m worried about Lisbet.”

  “Why, darlin’?” Hawks turned to face Rebecca, and leaned against the bar.

  “Let’s go somewhere more private.” Rebecca reached for both glasses and moved away from the bar, heading to a far table in a corner. Clinton followed.

  He pulled a chair out for her and sat beside her. “What’s on your mind, darlin’?”

  “I ain’t known Lisbet long, but the few times I’ve spoken to her, there’s one thing that is clear. She adores that little boy. For her to be involved in a fight like that in front of him worries me. Just hearin’ her talk, ya know she adores Rayne too, and honestly, if I was in her position, I’d be ready to kill anyone that hurt my family like Maddie has.”

  Clinton frowned as a worrisome thought formed. “Ya don’t believe she would really kill Maddie, do ya?”

  “I’d lean more towards Rayne doin’ that than Lisbet, but I don’t see Lisbet takin’ much more from Maddie. That woman is causin’ some bad heartache.”

  “Ah, there ain’t no use borrowin’ trouble. Rayne is a mighty fine woman, she would rather cut her arm off than to hurt anyone, least not without some regret or pain. I got a lot a faith in my deputy to do the right thing,” Hawks said with complete conviction. He did have total trust in his deputy to do what was right. He hoped he could trust her to do the right thing where Maddie was concerned as well.

  †

  Rayne walked to her hotel and went to her room to wash up. As she poured water in the wash basin she whistled a tune. She had a good feeling about tonight, and the thought of Lisbet missin’ her made her smile even bigger. She splashed water on her face, then found her dress shirt and a clean pair of jeans. Before long, she had her boots on and was heading towards the livery and her horse, totally unaware of the eyes that watched as she rode out of town.

  †

  Supper that evening comprised of a tasty pork roast, mashed potatoes, a delicious gravy made from the drippings of the roast, some glazed carrots, and lemonade. Desert was a warm apple pie and coffee. And while Rayne enjoyed the company of her friends, she was most happy that she was with Ben and Lisbet. Ben spent the evening bouncing up and down in his seat, giggling, and was generally disruptive, in a happy kid way.

  After several times of telling Ben to settle down, Rayne decided to take things into her own hands. “What do you say you, me, and Momma go for a walk?”

  “Yea, wet’s go, wet’s go!! Mon Momma, mon…” Ben jumped up and down with excitement.

  “What do you say, Lis, wanna go for a walk?” Rayne asked hopefully.

  Lisbet smiled as she looked at Rayne and Ben, who were
both watching her. “Sure, why not. I definitely do need to walk this meal off. I feel like I’ve gained a hundred pounds.”

  “Well come on, let’s get goin’.” Rayne responded with a big smile. Together, the three of them bid goodbye to Harry and Etta and headed out the door.

  Somewhere along the walk, Rayne and Lisbet began holding hands, as they watched Ben run ahead of them. The topic of the fight was ignored. They just walked.

  Lisbet pulled Rayne to a stop. “Rayne, have ya been able to go look at anymore ranches?”

  “No…I been busy, so I ain’t had a chance to. Why?”

  Lisbet reached for Rayne’s head, pulled it down, and gently placed a kiss on her lips. When she pulled away she whispered, “I think we need to find our own place. Unless ya don’t want me no more, I mean, I know I ain’t thin like I used to be but…”

  Rayne immediately placed a finger on Lisbet’s lips. “Woman, are you crazy? Ain’t I been tryin’ to convince ya that you’re the one my heart belongs to? Ain’t I been doin’ whatever I can think of to prove to ya that I made a mistake with the whore?” Rayne’s voice grew incredulous.

  Lisbet cleared her throat, grabbed Rayne’s shirt, and pulled her close, whispering against her lips, “I know you have been.” She gave the dark-haired woman a deep kiss. “Now let’s get our son, and a home. It’s time we get our family back together. What do you say, Deputy Mathews?”

  With a giant smile and a spring in her spirit, Rayne nodded enthusiastically. “I sure as hell think that’s a fine idea. Um, so do you…wanna move to the hotel with me? I mean…I don’t…I don’t wanna…am I takin’ too much for granted here?”

  “I really wanna be with ya. I can’t tell ya how much I wanna be with ya, but I can’t do that. Not with that woman right there.”

  Rayne kicked at a rock on the ground, as she thought about what she had just asked the woman she loved to do. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked that. I’ll see what I can do about findin’ us a place.”

  “We will find us a place.” Lisbet reached up and touched Rayne’s face tenderly.

  “So, uh, not that I ain’t grateful and all, but what made ya decide to give us another chance?”

  “Rayne, I don’t know if I can forget what ya done, and I can’t promise that it ain’t gonna pop up into my head from time to time. But try as I might, I can’t imagine my life without you. I don’t want to. I talked to Rebecca the other day, and she told me something that I ain’t been able to forget. I started to remember my days back when I was growin’ up at the saloon. The girls, well, they would talk about the guys who always just went in for a drink and to play cards. How there was this look to ‘em that just said their hearts belonged to someone and ain’t no one was gonna change that. Rebecca told me that she’s seen that look in your eyes. I know I seen it too, I just chose to ignore it.”

  Rayne nodded as she listened to what Lisbet said. She took a step towards Lisbet, who had just turned to catch Ben as he ran to her. A gunshot rang out, and the bullet whizzed by, striking a tree. “Jesus Christ,” Rayne exclaimed, as she hit her knee and reached for the holstered gun. “Stay down, and stay put.” She rushed towards the direction the gunshot had come from.

  “Rayne…” Lisbet shouted.

  Rayne turned slightly, “I said to stay there.” She turned back and headed into the darkness.

  It was too dark to see or find anything, so she went back to Lisbet and Ben. “Are you two alright?” She ran to them and scooped them up in her arms. Only when Lisbet and Ben were in her arms did she stopped shaking.

  “We’re fine, Rayne. Just take us home. Please.”

  “Ben, son, are ya alright?” Rayne pushed him out to arm's length and tried to look him over. In the light from the quarter moon, Rayne could barely see the boy nod. “Good, okay, let’s get back to Harry and Etta’s place. I’m damned sure whoever was out there is gone, and I ain’t gonna find anything in the dark.” Rayne led the way back to Harry’s house.

  †

  “I need to put Ben to bed. Will you wait to leave till I come back down?”

  “Yeah, I’ll wait.” Rayne kneeled down and reached for her son. “I love ya son, and I’ll see ya tomorrow okay?” When the boy nodded, she drew him into a hug. “Good, now you get some sleep and listen to your mama, ya hear?”

  Lisbet smiled. “Come along, Ben. I’ll be right back.”

  Rayne watched Lisbet walk up the steps with their son. When they’d reached the top, she turned to the study where Harry was sitting with the paper and glass of whiskey. “Uh, Harry, can I talk to ya for a minute?” She took a step towards the entry way.

  Harry put the paper down. “Of course, Rayne, come on in. What’s on your mind?” He stood up and went to the credenza where he reached for a glass and the bottle of whiskey.

  “I need ya to keep Lisbet and Ben safe. Someone just took a shot at us out there.” Rayne accepted the drink.

  “Oh shit, any idea who?”

  “No, it was too dark for me to see anything and way too dark to track whoever it was. Right now, I ain’t sure who they were aiming at. I can only assume it was me. In which case, it’s safer if I stay away.”

  “What do you mean, it’s safer if you stay away?” Lisbet interrupted, as she walked into the room.

  “I ah…I don’t know who shot at us, and I can’t take the risk of whoever it was tryin’ again and hittin’ you or Ben.” Rayne looked to Harry for help.

  “No, this isn’t…we need to talk about this.” Lisbet put her hands on her hips.

  “I need to keep you and our son safe, and I ain’t doin’ that if I’m bein’ shot at. I gotta figure out who took a shot at us just now. Until I do, it ain’t safe,” Rayne said in defense of her decision.

  “I don’t believe this…didn’t we just talk about puttin’ our family back together under one roof? And now here ya are makin’ decisions again that impact us without discussion.” Lisbet’s voice rose in anger.

  “Harry what…”

  “No. Do not bring Harry into this.” Lisbet’s eyes blazed with anger.

  “I just uh…” Harry cleared his throat then continued, “So, I’m only gonna say this, then I’ll leave you two alone to discuss this. But I see Rayne’s point. It’s one thing to know you’re in danger, but for someone ya love to be in danger because of you is something totally different.”

  “Is that so?” Lisbet shot back at the man. “Is that why you let Etta traipse all over God's creation alone? Lord knows you weren’t with her when she found shelter in our barn, were you?”

  Harry ran a hand through his hair as he turned red. “No…No, you’re right Lisbet, and I’m here to tell ya that had anything bad happened to her, I’d never be able to forgive myself. So, I understand where Rayne is comin’ from. I’ll leave you two now. Um let me just get my paper and whiskey.” Harry sidestepped away from Lisbet, grabbed his paper and glass, and sidestepped her again as he headed out the door. “I’ll make sure we keep an ear out for Ben,” he said as an afterthought.

  “Lisbet, I know…” Rayne began.

  “No, you don’t know. I didn’t fight to keep you in Willow Springs; I allowed you to talk me into lettin’ you come to this godforsaken place. A place where you allowed someone else in your bed. I’m willin’ to forgive you that. However I will not, will not forgive you not discussin’ this with me. We make this decision together, or Ben and I get back on that train and go home.”

  “Dammit, Lisbet, I cannot and will not put yours or Ben’s life in danger.” Rayne held her hand on her hip above her gun belt.

  “Rayne, when we met I was a on the street, stealin’ to get through the night, sleepin’ in alleys and barns, hopin’ and prayin’ that I didn’t get shot by the owner thinkin’ I was tryin’ to steal his horse or something. I set out with our son, traveled alone on a train here, and you don’t believe that was dangerous? You don’t think every day in this world is dangerous?”

  “I…”

  “I’m not
done. Do you recall your days on the trail ridin’ to the ranch? Did that ever seem dangerous to you? Or did that not count?”

  “Lisbet, you don’t understand. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if anything ever happened to you or Ben because of me.”

  “I understand that. But I promised to be by your side no matter what, through the good and the bad. We make our life here together, from here on out. If not, then they win.” Lisbet motioned to the outside world. “I swear to God, I will not allow Maddie to think she’s beat us.”

  “Ok. But there has to be some rules. And one of the rules has to be that you and Ben don’t go anywhere alone. You learn to shoot, and you wear a gun.”

  “Rayne, I can’t let her or anyone change who I am.”

  “Dammit, Lisbet, I can’t trust that I’ll always be there in time. Dammit. Right now, all I can think of and remember is Dobson. Ya remember him? I barely made it back home in time to keep you safe.”

  Lisbet looked at Rayne and saw the pain and fear in her eyes. She remembered James Dobson, a deputy back in Willow Springs who had attempted to molest her one day when Rayne was out checking the herd. Dobson was a hateful man who held nothing but contempt for Rayne and was set on causing her pain. Rayne barely made it home in time. Lisbet remembered the day clearly.

  Dobson had ridden up to the Rockin M Ranch looking for trouble. Lisbet thought the approaching rider was Rayne and ran out to greet her. She would always remember his arrival clearly. She didn’t like him and didn’t trust him. Afraid, she ran for the house.

  “Where ya goin’? You ain’t bein’ very hospitable now, are ya? I think maybe someone needs to teach you some manners, teach you how to respect a man. Now see, I think that’s your entire problem. Ya ain’t got no one to teach you what a man expects. What do you get from that bitch anyways? Seems to me she is missin’ the proper equipment.” He laughed at his own crude joke. “Oh hell, it don’t matter. I’m about to teach you all you need to know.” He sneered as he pushed her into the house, pushing her to the bedroom, his hand tight on her arm. He stood at the bedroom door, staring at her, as his hands worked the buckle of his gun belt. He let it drop to the floor, and the thud echoed in the house. Lisbet froze. Her mind screamed for her to run, but her body just couldn't obey. He approached her, his hands on the buttons of his pants, undoing them one by one. When he got within a foot of her, she screamed and swung her hand at him. The blow barely grazed his face, his however, connected with her cheek. She felt the back of his hand strike her right cheek, and she fell back onto the bed. He descended on her, his hand pushing the hem of the dress up and pulling at her undergarments. That's as far as he got, before he was pulled off and thrown across the room.