Family Case of Murder

by Vanessa Gray Bartal

  “That’s not true,” Robert said. “Lacy and I never fought, we never even disagreed.”

  Jason quirked an eyebrow at him. “Yeah? Pity, it’s a lot of fun.”

  Robert shot to his feet and Jason took a step forward. Lacy inserted herself between them. “Okay, this is insane. Robert, thanks for your help. If you think of anything else, please let us know.”

  “Lacy, you don’t really love this guy, do you? This is payback, bringing another man here. Tell me you don’t love him,” Robert pressed.

  “Who I love or don’t love is none of your business anymore,” Lacy said. She herded him toward the door and closed it when he was safely on the other side, leaning against it as the last of her emotional energy ebbed.

  “Why did you push him out when it was just getting good?” Jason asked. He sat. “Go ahead, I’m listening.”

  “Is it just me, or was that a scene from an O Henry story?” she said. “Both of them being blackmailed over that stupid ring.”

  “Yeah, crazy. So getting back to Robert’s question,” Jason prompted.

  “Chocolate,” Lacy said. “Where did you put the chocolate?”

  “I didn’t; it’s still in the bathroom.”

  Lacy walked into the bathroom and poked her head out. “Seriously, where did you put the chocolate, Jason?”

  “Don’t panic, it has to be there.” He came into the bathroom and searched, even going so far as to open the cupboard and drawers, but the chocolate wasn’t there.

  “Check your room,” Lacy commanded.

  “I didn’t take it to my…”

  “Check. Your. Room,” Lacy interrupted in a tone that brooked no argument, pointing toward the open door.

  Jason held up his hands and backed away. “Easy. I’m checking.”

  While he was looking, she searched her room in case she had taken the chocolates there and forgot. But they weren’t there. Jason returned, hovering at the perimeter in case he needed to flee for safety again.

  “They weren’t in my room,” he said.

  “They’re not in here,” she said. “I don’t understand this. Where could they be? Who would take my chocolate?”

  “The same person who took your scarf,” Jason said.

  “You think whoever took my scarf killed Hildy and then ate some celebratory chocolate? Who would do that?”

  “It concerns me that you’re more upset over the thought of someone eating your chocolate than someone killing Hildy,” Jason said.

  She stepped forward, grasping his biceps. “You don’t understand. I haven’t had sugar in two days, Jason. That’s the longest I’ve ever gone without. I don’t even know what’s going to happen to me, and I don’t want to find out. All I know is that I need chocolate, and I need it now. And before you suggest that this might be good for me or that I’ll eventually get used to it, let me tell you that there is a high feasibility that I will wound you should those words pass your lips.”

  “How about if I suggest that we search all the rooms until we find your chocolate?” he said.

  “You would do that for me?”

  “No, I would do that to find the killer because it’s likely that whoever took your chocolate also took the scarf.”

  “Good enough, I’ll take it. Let’s go.” She tugged his hand, pulling him out of the room, but he held her back.

  “Wait, there’s someone we should talk to first,” Jason said. “And I think I know where to find him alone.” Now he took the lead, tugging her behind him. They approached the drawing room and poked their heads around, finding Gregor in his usual spot on the couch.

  “You don’t actually think he killed Hildy, do you?” Lacy whispered. “I think it might take a heavy-duty spatula to pry him off the couch.”

  “He’s large enough to be naturally capable of strangling someone, and if I were thirty and still living in my parents’ basement, there’s a good probability I would be filled with murderous rage. Here’s how we’re going to play this: we’re going to do good cop, bad cop.”

  “The police really do that?” she asked.

  “Of course not. In the real world we call that good cop, lawsuit cop. But I’m not on duty, and for the purpose of expediency we’re going to try playing off each other to get what we want. Got it?”

  “Got it,” she said. She took a deep breath, following him into the room. But as soon as they were inside, she sidestepped him and approached Gregor. Grabbing his game, she plucked it out of his grasp and tossed it onto the couch before clutching the collar of his tracksuit in her hands. She tried to shake him, but couldn’t, so she leaned close to his face instead. “What did Hildy have on you? Why did you kill her? Tell me now, Gregor.”

  Jason picked up the game, put it back in Gregor’s now-slack hand, grabbed Lacy’s wrist, and towed her out of the room. “Excuse us a minute,” he called to Gregor.

  They rounded the corner of the room and he dropped her wrist, fisting his hand and pressing it to his eyes. “I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me the need to specify that you were supposed to be the good cop, and I was supposed to be the bad cop.”

  Lacy’s mouth puckered in a frozen O of understanding. “Yes, I can see now how that would have made more sense. No problem, we’ll just go in and switch it up. I’ll be good cop this time.”

  “No, if you go in there and act nice, then you’ll be multiple-personality-disorder cop. You’re just going to have to stick it. Don’t lose momentum. If you feel yourself softening toward him, just remember who is the most likely culprit to have stolen your chocolate.”

  “You think Gregor has my chocolate?” she hissed.

  “I think the chances are good,” he said.

  “Let’s do this thing,” she said. They went back into the room where Gregor sat exactly as he had been before they arrived, as if the whole interlude with Lacy had never happened. This time she vowed to make more of an impression. But when she tried to take his game again, he was ready for her. She pulled with both hands, and he did, too. Jason was right; he was surprisingly strong. Lacy propped her foot on his knee to try and gain some leverage. At last the game tugged free and she toppled onto her backside. “Ha!” she yelped, holding the game triumphantly in the air.

  “What is wrong with you?” Gregor asked. “Are you crazy?”

  “Maybe,” Lacy said, brushing her behind as she regained her footing. “Or maybe I’m simply a woman determined to get some answers. Now what did Hildy have on you?”

  His eyes shifted to the right in a move that screamed “I’m about to lie!” “Nothing,” he said, his tone sullen.

  “Do you see this?” Lacy said. She held up a section of her hair for his inspection. “This isn’t from a bottle; this is natural. And that thing you’ve heard about redheads with crazy tempers? It’s true. So I am warning you that you do not want to see me angry, Gregor. It’s scary, okay? Like banshee scary. Now what did Hildy have on you?”

  Gregor was looking at her again in puzzled confusion. “Seriously, lady, what is wrong with you?”

  Jason stepped forward and took the game from Lacy’s hand. Gregor’s eyes followed it as if he were a dog and Jason was about to throw his favorite ball. “You want this back?” Jason asked.

  Gregor nodded.

  “Tell us what we want to know and you can have it. We’ll go away, and you can play your game in peace.”

  “You’re a cop,” Gregor said, shifting and squirming in his seat.

  “I’m also off duty and out of my jurisdiction. As long as I believe that you didn’t kill Hildy, then whatever you tell me stays between us.”

  “What about her?” Gregor said, narrowing his eyes on Lacy. “I don’t trust her.”

  “She’s safe; the monkey fever makes her not be able to remember anything,” Jason said. “Now talk.”

  “Hildy found out about my business.”

  “What business?” Jason asked.

  “I record movies at the theater.”

  “You mean bootleg co
pies?” Jason clarified.

  “Yes. I go on opening weekend, record new movies, and sell downloads and DVDs. I make a lot of money doing something I love. What’s the harm?”

  The harm was that it was highly illegal and could incur a huge prison term. Jason was regretting his promise not to turn him in because he couldn’t stand to see someone getting away with something illegal, but he had given his word. “Did you kill Hildy?”

  “No,” Gregor said. This time he looked Jason unflinchingly in the eye. “I gave her a couple thousand bucks to stay quiet, and that was it. Why would I kill her?”

  “Maybe because the prison term for illegal pirating is longer than for murder,” Jason suggested.

  Gregor gulped. “It is?”

  Jason nodded. “Something to think about. I suggest you find a new business.” He gave Gregor back his game and turned to go, but Lacy wasn’t ready.

  “Wait a minute, what about my chocolate?”

  “What chocolate?” Gregor said. “I don’t have any chocolate.”

  “How do I know you’re telling the truth? Open your mouth. I want to smell your breath.” She took a step forward, but Jason put his arm around her waist, dragging her back. “If you have my chocolate, just leave it outside my door, and we’ll never speak of this again.”

  “I don’t have any chocolate,” Gregor said, frowning.

  “If you’re lying, I’ll know!” Lacy yelled, and that was when Jason threw her over his shoulder and carried her from the room.

  Chapter 12

  “We’re going to have to split up to search the rooms,” Jason whispered as they walked away from the drawing room and Gregor. He set Lacy down. “You distract people while I do it. We’ll meet up later.”

  “There’s no way I’m letting you do that alone; I’m going with you.”

  “No, it’s too risky,” Jason said. “Besides, I’m a professional and you’re whatever that was back there. I’m seriously beginning to wonder if you actually have some form of monkey fever.”

  “It’s possible that I get a little crazy without regular doses of sugar,” Lacy conceded.

  “Leave the last five words off that statement and I’ll agree with you,” Jason said. “The point is you’re not going with me.”

  “The point is you don’t tell me what to do. I’m coming with you.”

  “Then who is going to create a diversion?”

  “We’ll have to get help, someone who is good at lying and enjoys being the center of attention,” Lacy said. “And, thankfully for us, I can probably guess exactly where my little sister is right now.” She opened the door to her bedroom and Riley turned toward them, one of Lacy’s dresses suspended from a hanger around her neck.

  “Really, Lacy? You’re going to try and pull this off? With your figure?” Her wrinkled lip let Lacy know what she thought of that idea.

  “I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that you think you’ll look much better in it,” Lacy said.

  “Since when are you a six?” Riley asked. “You’re going to look like a sausage in this thing.”

  “I am a six, and I do not look like a…You know what? Keep it, as long as you’re willing to do a little quid pro quo.”

  “Is that the game from Harry Potter?” Riley asked.

  “Don’t play dumb,” Lacy said. Her sister may like to pretend she was an airhead, but she was actually very intelligent.

  “Fine,” Riley said. “What do you want?”

  “We’re going to search everyone’s bedrooms. We need you to keep them all together somewhere.”

  “And how will I explain your absence?” Riley asked. “Wait, never mind. I’ve got it.”

  Her self-satisfied smirk sent Lacy’s warning bells ringing. “What is it?”

  “I’ll say you’re having a tryst somewhere on the property.”

  “You can’t say that,” Lacy said.

  “Why not?”

  “Because it’s not true,” Lacy said. And it was embarrassing. She wasn’t a tryst sort of woman.

  “People will believe it is, especially with the way you guys have been hanging all over each other like teenagers at a makeout party. I keep expecting one of you to pull out a bottle and spin it,” Riley said.

  “That’s not even a little bit true,” Lacy said, blushing.

  “Then how do you explain the fact that I’ve caught you kissing twice in two days?” Riley asked.

  “You walked into my room uninvited,” Lacy sputtered. “What I do in the privacy of my room is totally different than the way I act in public. You’re making it sound licentious.” She whispered the last word, leaning forward so Riley would be sure to catch it.

  “Oh, you are such a pathetic loser,” Riley said. “Seriously, Lacy, who talks like that? Are you ninety? I can’t believe we’re related.”

  “Neither can I,” Jason added. “You could do something nice for your sister without humiliating her. I think you’ve done that enough for one lifetime.”

  Riley looked properly chastised, but it was hard to tell because she was a good actress and could flip her expressions on and off at will. “Fine, I’ll think of something less licentious.” She rolled her eyes. “It might occur to you to be offended that your girlfriend finds the thought of being with you embarrassing.” The flirtatious smile she gave him let him know that if she were his girlfriend, she wouldn’t find it embarrassing at all.

  “It might occur to me to be grateful that she likes to keep our private life private. Now why don’t you go round everyone up so Lacy and I can do what we need to do. And, for the record, Lacy looks awesome in that dress. Frankly, I don’t think you have the curves to pull it off. These match.” He handed her a pair of Lacy’s ballet flats. “Good luck trying to fill your sister’s shoes.”

  This time the expression on Riley’s face was honest, and it was angry. She stalked out of the room and slammed the door.

  “Oooh, you are going to pay for that remark,” Lacy said.

  “I’m not afraid of her,” Jason said.

  “I wasn’t talking about her,” Lacy said. She tugged him closer and slipped her arms around his neck. “Do you know that you are the first person in my entire life who has ever stood up to Riley for me?”

  “I find that hard to believe,” he said. “What about your parents?”

  “Riley is Mom’s favorite, and Dad just wants to keep the peace.”

  “What about your grandparents?”

  “Grandma and Grandpa didn’t want to take sides, and you know how things went with Robert. He thought Riley was delightful and all her cutting remarks amusing. No, you are definitely the first. And I find that I’m truly grateful.” She finished the last in a soft whisper as she inched closer and pressed her lips to his. Jason watched in fascination as if he couldn’t quite believe Lacy was the one making the first move, which she rarely did. The kiss began to take off when Lacy’s phone rang. Jason had been with her enough times to know Tosh’s ringtone by heart.

  “I’m sorry,” Lacy muttered, pulling away so she could set her phone to vibrate as Tosh’s call went to voicemail.

  “I’m beginning to really hate that guy,” Jason said.

  Lacy pressed her palm to his chest and stuffed the phone in her pocket. “Don’t. How do you think it makes me feel to have two people I care about at odds with each other this way?”

  “If you’re going to ask if we can all just get along, then the answer is no,” Jason said.

  “Can we at least agree to disagree in silence? I get it; you two have issues.”

  “We have one issue and she’s standing right here. You know how to end it, Lacy. Why won’t you just do it? Why won’t you just say the words and put one of us out of our misery? Because it seems to me that if you don’t know by now, then you’re never going to know.”

  “It’s not that simple,” Lacy said.

  “It really is,” Jason argued. “You have some misguided notion that drawing out the process is going to make things easier, b
ut you’re wrong. Quick and clean, like ripping off a bandage. That’s the best way.”

  “We should get started. You made Riley so angry that she’ll probably send everyone to their rooms, just for giggles.”

  Jason sighed. “And now you’re changing the subject. I never thought of myself as a patient person before you. Then again, I never understood that some things were worth waiting for, either.” He held the door open and stood aside, closing it behind them.

  They started with Chuck and Sue’s room because it was closest to theirs. The first thing they noticed was a mannequin head on the stand beside the bed.

  “What’s that for?” Lacy asked.

  “I think it’s for a wig,” Jason answered. They crept closer and saw a lace bustier lying on one side of the bed, the side opposite the dummy head.

  “First of all, ew. I don’t want to imagine Sue in this,” she said, holding it up by one finger. It had more strings than material. “Who brings this to their maiden aunt’s house for the weekend? Second, if this is Sue’s side of the bed, then what’s the wig rest doing over there?”

  “I’m thinking Chuck’s hair might not all be his own.”

  “That guy wear’s a toupee?” Lacy asked. If so, it was a good one. “Do you think Hildy found out, and that’s why he killed her?”

  “Before I met the man, I never would have thought anyone would be crazy enough to kill someone over a rug, but then I would never have believed there was anyone who insisted on singing the theme song from Walker, Texas Ranger as an addendum to Aunt Enid’s prayer at supper.”

  They made quick work of the room, sorting through the closet, bathroom, and dresser. There was only the nightstand left. Lacy stood behind Jason as he opened the drawer and quickly shut it again. Turning his back to it, he pressed it closed.

  “What? What is it?” Lacy asked.

  “Nothing. Let’s go.”

  “Now I’m curious,” Lacy said. She reached for the drawer, but Jason grabbed her hand, pulling it back.

  “Trust me, Red, if you were disgusted by the bustier, you do not want to open that drawer. I wish I could unsee what I just saw. In fact, let’s go so I can wash my hands and my eyes.” He grasped her hand, leading her from the room. Lacy gave one more look at the drawer, her flaming curiosity getting the better of her so that when Jason’s grasp slackened, she dodged away and flung it open, yelping in surprise.