An Empty Cup

by Sarah Price

  Nan didn’t seem to notice that while she inspected the kitchen and attached sitting room, she, too, was being scrutinized. Without looking at Rosanna, she took a few steps, her black sneakers shuffling on the clean kitchen floor. With pursed lips, she examined everything, her curiosity so great that Rosanna looked around as well, wondering what Nan had seen that was so interesting.

  “Well,” the younger woman finally said. “This is pleasant enough!”

  Rosanna frowned, wondering at the meaning of this curious comment, but she was too well mannered to ask. Instead, she stepped forward and extended her hand in greeting. “I take it that you are Nan, then.”

  Nan stood with complete confidence, her feet spread apart and her posture straight and tall. For a moment, Rosanna wondered if her hand would be accepted. Reluctantly, it was.

  “I am,” Nan said simply.

  Uncertain of how to proceed, Rosanna glanced out the window, hoping to see Reuben walking toward the house. She knew it didn’t take that long to unharness the horse from the buggy. Where was he? “Did your bruder come with you, then?”

  “Nee,” Nan said. “He’s with Jonathan today. He couldn’t make it.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, Rosanna finally saw Reuben walking across the driveway toward the house. She felt relieved that he would be joining them. She wasn’t certain what to think of Nan. Her words and actions were too abrupt and forward for Rosanna’s taste.

  “Your bruder is working with Jonathan, ja?” Rosanna said. “He must be a skilled worker if he’s been hired all the way from New York.”

  Nan didn’t have time to respond before the door opened and Reuben entered the room, a smile on his face.

  “I see you’ve met!”

  Rosanna wanted to respond that she had indeed met Nan but that Nan had not really met her or even asked who she was. Instead, Rosanna smiled and gestured toward the table. “I have supper ready, if you’d care to sit a spell.”

  The table was set for five. Aaron was still outside working, and Cate was upstairs in her bedroom. From the sound of it, she had snuck one of the dogs upstairs, most likely Jack, who was Cate’s shadow. Rosanna didn’t want to say anything while Nan was here, but she made a mental note to speak later to her daughter about the “No Dogs in the House” rule.

  Nan took a seat adjacent to Reuben, not offering to assist Rosanna with the meal, as any other Amish woman normally would. At least Amish women around here, Rosanna reminded herself. Different communities of Amish behaved in different manners. Mayhaps Nan came from a community that was more abrupt and less giving.

  Rosanna walked to the stairs and called for Cate to join them. Once Cate bounded down the stairs, she paused and stared at Nan.

  “Nan, this is my dochder, Cate,” Rosanna said as she began to set dishes on the table: fresh green beans, corn, beets, fried chicken, meatballs, and homemade pasta.

  “I didn’t know you had kinner!”

  “My son, Aaron, will be joining us momentarily,” Rosanna added. “Cate, will you go fetch him, please?”

  Her eyes still focused on Nan, Cate walked toward the door. Perhaps it was the way that Nan had said the word kinner, or maybe it was just Nan’s general lack of enthusiasm meeting the child that had turned off Cate, but something hadn’t sat well with her. Rosanna knew her daughter well enough to know that Cate immediately disliked the woman.

  After the silent prayer, Rosanna stole a quick glance at Reuben, hoping that he would start a conversation. When none came, Rosanna cleared her throat and looked across the table at their guest. “Reuben said you moved here from New York,” she began. “That’s a long way to move without any family in the area.”

  Nan shrugged her shoulders. “I wanted a change,” she explained. “My parents’ store in New York is rather small, and Samuel told me about this opportunity here.” Nan smiled as she said her brother’s name, and for the first time, Rosanna caught a glimpse of emotion in her. “It’s gut that he’s not alone here while learning the trade with the Lapps.”

  “I’m sure he’s glad for your company,” said Rosanna.

  “And I for the chance to run my own business,” Nan blurted out, too proudly for Rosanna’s taste. “Reuben told me that once I learn the office portion, he’ll let me run the shop while he’s away.”

  Knowing better than to question her husband in front of someone, especially a stranger, Rosanna merely shifted her eyes to look at him. He had mentioned wanting to spend more time with her, but going away? She hadn’t heard any mention of that.

  “Pinecraft,” he said, as if reading her mind. Located on the gulf coast of Florida, Pinecraft was a popular destination for Amish couples during the colder months up north. “Winters here are downright brutal as of late. Sure would be nice to head south for a few months and not worry about the store.”

  Rosanna bit her lower lip, willing herself not to speak. Aaron was sixteen and finished with his schooling, but Cate was only twelve. Cate was far too young to be left alone for such a long period of time. And Rosanna did not want to leave Aaron by himself to shoulder the work on the farm. This would definitely be a discussion she and Reuben would need to have in the privacy of their room.

  “I see,” Rosanna finally responded.

  Nan seemed to relax. “I have enough experience with my daed’s shop.” She paused, a dark cloud passing over her expression. “My onkel’s shop now.” She emphasized the word onkel as if it left a bad taste on her tongue. “It’s a small enough shop. I reckon he can handle it without me.”

  “Surely he could have used your help,” Rosanna said, uncertain how to address the fact of Nan’s parents being deceased. “It must have been upsetting when your community was hit by such tragedy.”

  With a little prodding, Nan began to talk about New York and her father’s store. Although he had made harnesses for the Amish in the community, a lot of his goods were purchased premade. At Reuben’s store, everything was custom made per order to ensure top-notch quality. It was one of the reasons why the Troyer Harness Shop was so popular with the Amish as well as the Englische.

  Reuben didn’t seem concerned about the differences in the two shops, either in regard to size or product. On the contrary. He seemed relaxed and content, as if the weight of the world had been removed from his shoulders. He sat at the head of the table, beaming as he listened to Nan talk about her experience.

  “My daed always resisted change,” she said. “I told him that he should put in more advanced ordering systems. He didn’t listen to me.”

  Reuben seemed interested and nodded his head. “Oh ja?”

  “And marketing! He refused to listen to my ideas about expanding the business.” She stared at Reuben, ignoring Rosanna. “He would have grown his business if he had listened to me.”

  “Business is not all about growth,” Reuben said lightly. “Unless you’re an Englischer!”

  Nan didn’t take his joke lightly. Instead, her eyes darkened. “If it’s not about growth, then what is it about?”

  He leaned forward and tapped a finger on the tabletop. “Providing a service. A good, reputable service that people can count on.” He gestured toward Aaron. “No different than what a farmer provides to the community. Fresh produce and good milk, right?”

  Aaron nodded. “It’s true. Make enough money to pay your bills and put a dollar or two in the bank.”

  Nan scoffed at Aaron’s remark. “Mayhaps that’s true, Aaron, until such a time as you have to expand your farm and have no money to do so!” She looked back at Reuben, a fierce determination in her expression. “My ideas will expand your business, Reuben. Expansion. That would have made the difference with my daed’s shop, if he had only listened to me.” She paused. “That is why you hired me, ja?”

  Growing weary of listening to Nan’s steady stream of self-inflated praise and purpose, Rosanna looked for an opportunity to redirect the subject. “Nan, tell me . . . have you moved into the house already, then?” While Rosanna knew the answer,
she wanted to change the subject, not caring for the direction in which the conversation was headed.

  “Ja, we did,” Nan affirmed without any enthusiasm in her voice. “Don’t have much furniture as of yet.”

  “Oh?” Rosanna was surprised.

  “Too expensive to ship our furniture from New York,” Nan stated flatly. “Just Saturday last, we went to the thrift store in New Holland. We bought a few things . . . plates, pans, mattresses.” She looked up and forced a smile. “The essentials, ja?”

  Despite being in her thirties, Nan was unlike other Amish women who dreamed of home and hearth. Most Amish women, Rosanna knew, wouldn’t move far from their family, church, and community. Instead, they’d remain near the people who could support them in times of need, both emotionally and financially. Nan, however, didn’t seem very concerned about moving so far away and living among strangers, even if she was clearly unhappy that Reuben’s house had not been furnished. Rosanna wondered if Nan’s lack of desire to stay in New York had anything to do with the loss of her mother. The thought struck Rosanna that sitting in front of her was another wounded bird.

  “Perhaps we have extra furniture that you might use, Nan. What are you missing?” asked Rosanna.

  “Well, the kitchen doesn’t have much of anything,” she said, sounding a bit disdainful. “And Samuel’s room is fine enough, but I’m not too keen for my mattress being on the floor.” She lifted her eyebrows as she met Rosanna’s gaze. “Mice, you know.”

  “Oh my.” Rosanna caught her breath. A mattress on the floor? Mice in the house? “Why, I could certainly see if our neighbors have extra furniture to borrow, Nan. And I know that they have an abundance of cats. I hadn’t realized that mice had taken over.” The words popped out before Rosanna knew what she was saying. She fought the urge to wince. She knew that fulfilling such an offer would take more time than she had to give.

  “It wasn’t very clean,” Nan responded. She wrinkled her nose when she spoke, her disapproval obvious. “But if someone has any extra furniture, might be nice. A sofa and decent table would help, I reckon.”

  If Reuben took offense that Nan didn’t mince her words about the state of his house, he didn’t show it. Rosanna, however, was surprised by Nan’s criticism.

  At least they have a place to live, Rosanna thought. Still, she couldn’t fight the urge to help the younger woman. After all, Nan was miles away from home and apparently living in a house with nothing in the way of comfort.

  If only Reuben would have told her earlier. Perhaps that was why Nan seemed abrasive and unhappy, especially when she saw how tidy and neat their house was.

  Putting aside her initial feeling of disapproval, Rosanna took a deep breath and swallowed her pride. Whether or not she liked Nan as a person, she knew the proper thing to do. “Mayhaps on Thursday,” she heard herself say, “I could come and help clean the place. I’m sure a good cleaning with Murphy’s oil would fix it right up!”

  Something changed in Nan’s expression. Her fierce eyes softened, and she pursed her lips in a near smile. “I would like that, Rosanna,” Nan said. “It’s a daunting task to consider on my own.”

  Rosanna smiled back. For the first time during the visit, Rosanna caught a glimmer of what her husband saw in the young woman. Perhaps her strong personality would be an advantage for him at the shop. And giving was a Christian thing to do, after all. “I’d be more than happy to, Nan. Let me get the little one off to her aendi’s haus, and I’ll come right over.”

  Reuben nodded, appearing pleased with the connection between his wife and his new employee. While he didn’t say much, the sparkle in his eyes spoke of his gratitude for Rosanna’s kindness.

  During the meal, Nan asked Rosanna a few questions about her family—where they lived and what they did for a living.

  “My parents live in the grossdaadihaus at my bruder’s farm in Pequea,” Rosanna said as she passed the bowl of corn and beet salad to Cate. Cate wrinkled her nose and shook her head. Rosanna dished a spoonful onto her daughter’s plate, ignoring her look of dislike. “They’re older now and don’t travel much. My two schwesters married into families farther out that way, too. None of my other immediate family lives nearby,” she admitted.

  Rosanna stopped her story there. She wasn’t willing to share any more about how she had met Timothy at a youth gathering and come to live so far from family. Timothy had been staying with cousins for a while. He had told Rosanna that he was helping out on their farm while his uncle was sick. In hindsight, Rosanna knew that he might have had an ulterior motive: looking for a bride. It was good for the young men to marry women from different church districts. After all, up to half the people in any given g’may were related to each other.

  Their courtship had been quick, just three months of buggy rides home after youth singings. Rosanna had been smitten right away, at first with his big brown eyes that seemed to dance when he spoke to her, and then with the idea of living in another town, the wife of a farmer on their own farm. With the diminishing amount of farmland in the area, many men were taking jobs among the Englische to provide for their families. The fact that Timothy had saved up enough money to buy a house on thirty acres spoke highly of his work ethic and ability to save money, even if it was located fifteen miles away from Pequea.

  Her family, however, were not as enthusiastic about the union. Of course, they hadn’t expressed such an opinion—not in so many words anyway. But Rosanna noticed the difference in her parents’ behavior toward Timothy. They were less warm and talkative than they were with her older sisters’ husbands. The lack of favor created a divide between Rosanna and her family, and, combined with the physical distance, Rosanna had lost touch with everyone over six years ago. In fact, only one of her brothers bothered to show up at Timothy’s funeral, and he hadn’t even stayed for the meal.

  “Pequea?” Nan looked at Reuben. “We took an order from there the other day, ja?”

  Reuben wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand. “Ja, Pequea. They hired a driver to come out here to bring their broken collar and harness.”

  Rosanna clicked her tongue and shook her head. She disliked hearing that—not from the perspective of the extra business, but because fewer Amish were providing quality leather repair or making new items that didn’t break after just one season. In her opinion, quantity sales and quality products did not need to be mutually exclusive. Focusing on the former over the latter was the Englische way of thinking.

  “It’s a shame you don’t just have all the Pequea customers drop everything off at James’s farm and pick up or drop off once or twice a month. Save them the driver and help them all time-wise.”

  Ignoring Rosanna, Nan kept her attention on Reuben. “What you need is a computer in the shop.”

  Reuben waved his hand, dismissing the suggestion. “Bah! Already have a telephone,” he said. He glanced at Rosanna, and she smiled. After all, she had been the one to convince him that the shop needed a telephone. He’d been reluctant, telling her that his store was busy enough without the hassle of answering phone calls. However, when she pointed out that he’d be able to take in more orders from far away, even out of state, he had relented.

  Nan lit up. “That would be even better! Why, with your own web page, you could accept orders from all over the country! And, of course, with a computer, you could simplify your accounting and manage your inventory!”

  Reuben laughed and set down his fork. With his elbow on the edge of the table, he pointed to his temple with one finger. “This, Nan,” he said. “This is my inventory. I keep it all up here. Ask me how many items we have on the shelves, and I can tell you.”

  There was no doubt that he spoke the truth. Rosanna had never met anyone with such an ability to recall facts. During their courtship, Reuben had impressed her with his recitation of Bible verses. He always seemed to know an appropriate quote for any situation. After they married, she was further amazed at how Reuben remembered everything that happened at the store.
Each evening, he’d recount who bought what during the day. And she noticed that, despite so much increased business, she never saw him with a calendar or a list of reminders. Instead, he just remembered every order and made certain to deliver the goods as promised and on time.

  If Rosanna was impressed by Reuben’s powers of recall, Nan was not. “It’s the twenty-first century, Reuben,” she said sharply. “Every business has a computer. It’s archaic that you don’t. Besides, you are the only one who knows what’s in your head, ain’t that so?”

  Rosanna bristled at the use of the word archaic.

  “We use the office phone for orders, Nan,” he replied, clearly unconcerned by her comments. His patience was endless and impressive. Rosanna wasn’t certain she would have remained so calm. Her own heart pounded, and she felt the muscles in her neck twitch. “And we have more than enough business, ain’t so?” He winked at Nan. “Enough to hire a new office person anyway.”

  And with that, the discussion over installing a computer in the shop ended.

  After the meal, Aaron offered to take Nan back to her house. Rosanna was surprised when Reuben agreed, suggesting that her son take his horse and buggy. “No sense bothering your old horse with the round trip,” he explained to Nan. “Besides, my mare needs some extra work. Hasn’t been worked in a while, ja?”

  Aaron seemed equally as surprised with the offer. “Why, danke, Reuben.” Given that it was Sunday and Reuben’s horse was a steady ride, Rosanna knew that Aaron wouldn’t be back anytime soon. He would certainly take the opportunity to visit some friends on his way back home.

  To Rosanna’s relief, Reuben escorted Nan outside, keeping her company while Aaron harnessed the horse to the buggy. From the kitchen window, Rosanna could see that they were deep in conversation. Nan’s hands moved in the air as she spoke. Several times Rosanna thought she noticed Nan interrupt Reuben, cutting him off with her own thoughts and opinions. When the buggy finally rolled down the long driveway, Reuben stood and stared after it for just a moment before he wandered into the barn, probably to make certain everything was settled for the evening.