The Bear's Home

by Emilia Hartley

  Tom nodded his agreement from where he sat. “Even taking into account that many of his bears are untrained, like Savannah was, I have to say that quantity likely outshines quality in this scenario. Even us alphas have limits, bro.”

  Nick chewed his lip as he worked things over. “But there’s a reason he hasn’t done that,” he muttered. “Even before Dominic, if what Dan’s saying is true, he had more than enough men to surround us. So why hasn’t he?” He looked to Dan for a possible answer.

  Dan shrugged. “I couldn’t say. We talked strats, but it was mostly patrols and reconnaissance. When we attacked, he only told me who to take with me, not why the rest couldn’t follow along.”

  He shrugged again, hating that for all his years in that dreadful pack, he had little helpful information to show for it. “Lucas didn’t really find much use in most of his pack members. As you saw with me the night I got busted up, at the slightest sign of weakness, a bear becomes little more than garbage to him.” Even now, the memory still made him feel useless, but he pressed on.

  “But at the same time, Lucas doesn’t like dropping in numbers. He’s made it abundantly clear that his number one goal is outmanning your pack and anyone else who’d dare to oppose him. So he won’t get rid of anyone, but he’ll beat them, make them do menial tasks, or otherwise separate them from the pack in some sort of solitary confinement-style punishment.” He worked to stifle the harsh memories as they came rushing back, suppressing a shudder. “He specializes in breaking people.”

  “So what you’re saying is, he likely just didn’t find them worthy of doing something as important as fighting on the frontlines,” Nick pondered.

  Dan shrugged again. “Can never be too sure with Lucas, but yeah. That’d be my guess.”

  Nick nodded once more, eyes still deep in thought. “Thanks for the info. It helps for planning our next step,” he said with a light smile, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “We can discuss this more in about an hour. For now, you just go and try to clear your head. You look like you could use a little extra time to yourself.” Without waiting for a goodbye, Nick departed into the garage area of the shop, eyes lost in thought once more.

  Tom stared thoughtfully at Dan for a silent moment before saying, “Cheer up dude.” He grinned. “You don’t want your girlfriend to see you all glum like that when she gets here. Kills the mood.” He slipped into the garage behind his brother before Dan had time to retort.

  Stomping into the woods, Dan lifted his shirt, balling it up in his fists. His bear seemed to be pacing in agitation, and Dan couldn’t help but feel the same way. He couldn’t explain why he felt so foul that morning, but it niggled in the back of his mind like a fester of fleas. He hoped a run would calm his mind, giving his bear a chance to roar and leap and fight until the frustration and anger melted away.

  He jogged deeper into the forest before stripping the rest of his clothes, already feeling the power of the beast as it pushed against his skin with the need to be free. The shift was quick and painful, the bear taking no care as it tore itself from Dan’s body. His pained shout turned into a bellowing roar as the shift completed, the final ripples of the change wafting over his dark coat.

  Shaking his fur, Dan’s body vibrated with energy, the need to run singing through his veins. He took one last moment to center himself before pushing forward on his paws and launching himself through the woods.

  He didn’t know for how long he’d run, or even in which direction he’d go, only that he kept moving until he could feel the wind whistling through his fur and nothing else.

  It wasn’t long before he happened upon the lake that Tom and Savannah frequented regularly, and he didn’t hesitate before throwing himself into its cool depths. The chill of the water rushed over him, nearly freezing in his sudden submersion. The heat of his frustration cooled quickly as he swam, his paws pulling effortlessly through the water as he made his way to the opposite bank.

  Hoisting himself out of the water, Dan finally tried to relax. He shook the water from his fur before sitting back in the grass and leaning heavily against a tree.

  This deep in the forest, he could hear all the little stirrings of wildlife that made his bear form so comforting to live in. The mice scurried for cover as owls swooped from above, the yips of foxes sounded in the distance as they ran and played with one another. The harshness of the cold morning wind was muted from the cover of the tall trees, and the temperature of the gentle breeze that remained was perfect for Dan to lounge about in.

  It was in that moment, basking in the gentle forest morning, that clarity found him. He suddenly knew why he felt so out of sorts. It was this. The glory and wonder of nature in a way that only a bear could appreciate, and the woman he found seemingly perfect had openly rejected it right before him.

  The answer to his racing mind didn’t really make him feel any better, but it did calm the fretfulness of not knowing the answer to begin with. Whether he was satisfied with the fruits of his pondering or not, it was all he was going to get. With a deep sigh, Dan pushed himself back up onto all fours and began his amble back to the shop. He’d think on it more in his free time, but for now, it was time to start the day.

  The shift back to human form was reluctant, but simple enough. The bear knew that there were more pressing matters to deal with than the probable wrench in a potentially budding love life, so it let Dan get back to the day ahead with minimal complaint. As he slid on the clothes he’d left haphazardly strewn at the forest’s edge, Dan promised the bear another romp through the woods soon enough.

  His thoughts wandered back to Lucy as he made the final trek back to the shop. A woman that he barely knew and should hardly trust all things considered, yet he wasn’t above admitting that he wanted something more to happen between them. And that’s exactly why her declaration the night before hurt him so much.

  Shifting was such a fundamental part of who Dan was; he couldn’t picture his life without it. He recalled his contemplation on the possibility of a human mate and how quickly he casted it aside because he felt, deep down, he needed another bear that understood all of him. As much as he hated to admit it, a bit of hope blossomed in his heart when he learned that Lucy was a shifter because it made his immediate attraction to her a little less complicated.

  But then she told everyone that she didn’t shift.

  Hello again, complication.

  Learning a bit of Lucy’s backstory, Dan could guess that there was a good reason that she chose not to shift, but the primal side of him didn’t know how. To him, giving into the beast was natural and inevitable. He hoped that, whatever her reasons, she’d remain open-minded to a life with the pack that included showing her bear every once in a while. Otherwise, he wasn’t sure if there was much of a future for them, after all.

  He scoffed quietly to himself. “Figures.” I should have known better, he finished internally as he stepped through the shop doors. Cursed bears don’t deserve happiness, remember?

  Distant noises of power tools and the strong odor of axle grease filled the quiet office area, signs of the alpha brothers hard at work. With a final long sigh, Dan forced down the turmoil that churned deep in his belly about the fundamentals of shifting and the beautiful woman who defied them. He worked here, too, and Lucy aside, they had too much to do for him to worry about something so miniscule in comparison. Tom would probably be leaving soon to work on the house, and Nick would need help with the auto work before patrols started for the day. On top of that, having openly vouched for Lucy to the point of borderline pleading for Nick to trust her, he felt obligated to watch over her for Nick on the off chance that his intuition was completely wrong about her. Not that he minded doing it; he could hardly complain about having to survey a beautiful woman all-day, anti-shifting or otherwise. His attraction to her was still going strong, but there was a little sadness in the mix now.

  I wonder if talking to her about it will change anything, he thought, somberly. If he found out the reas
ons behind her unwillingness to shift, could he maybe talk her into a change of heart someday soon?

  Unbidden, the question had hope blossoming unceremoniously in his heart once more. If he had to guess, it likely had something to do with her thug of a brother. If all she knew of shifting came from him, Dan couldn’t blame her for being reluctant to embrace that part of her. But maybe, just maybe, he could show her the good side of shifting. Maybe all she needed was a glimpse at the bigger picture, what being a shifter is supposed to look like.

  His heart began to lift as he thought of the possibilities. He’d likely be spending a lot of time with her in the coming days, which meant he’d have plenty of time to convince her that there was a good side to her bear. He’d show her everything he could, how important and strong and beautiful she could truly be.

  He thought back to all of the helpless bears still trapped in Lucas’s clutches, and how he’d vowed a mission to help them see that there was more and better than what they knew. As thoughts of Lucy ran circles in his mind, he knew without a doubt that the best place to start was with her.

  Chapter Nine

  “Good morning!” bellowed a cheery, deep voice as Lucy entered the office.

  She smiled at Dan, his wide grin so early in the morning, making it hard for her not to reciprocate. She could admit to herself that he looked quite handsome, the bit of bruising that remained from his tussle with Dominic notwithstanding. His muscles stood out in the dusty shop vest that he wore, but not in the garish way that her brother’s muscles bulged with the slightest movement. Dan looked… organic, real, and strong in a way that Lucy could most definitely appreciate.

  “Has your morning treated you well?” she asked as Jo rummaged with something in her trunk. Dominic hadn’t told her much of anything about this pack before they uprooted and moved here. The idea of a human mate seemed odd to say the least, but she’d warmed to Jo rather quickly. Staying with the alpha and his human mate at the cabin wasn’t nearly as awkward as she’d originally feared it’d be.

  Dan nodded, snapping her from her reverie. “Absolutely,” he answered, his grin growing. “Nothing like a bear run first thing in the morning to get a tired mind going!”

  Instantly, something soured in her stomach. “Oh.” She felt her smile wilting around the edges, but she tried not to show it. The night before, she knew she saw something change in his eyes when she told them all that she didn’t shift, but she wasn’t sure how they’d take it. Surprisingly, they didn’t seem to care, but in a pack where the alpha leader’s life mate is a human, she assumed they held more open ideals than most. Even Dan hadn’t said anything outright, but there was something in that gaze of his…

  “So,” Dan continued, unfazed by her sudden silence. “What are your plans for the day? They putting you to work already?”

  She shrugged, looking around the shop. “I told them I’d help wherever I could.” She smiled up at him, seeing a good opportunity to steer the topic of conversation away from shifting for a while. “Think you can help me with that, sailor?” Dan’s eyes glimmered as he grinned, and it warmed Lucy’s heart. He really was a good guy. It was refreshing.

  “Helping others is what I do best!” he quipped, taking a cursory look around the shop. “I know Jo’s been working to spruce this drab office up a bit. Maybe you can help with that?”

  Lucy followed his gaze around the office, her nose wrinkling subconsciously. “DIY isn’t really my thing.”

  “Oh come on,” Dan laughed. “It’s just a bit of dusting and maybe laying a little paint on the walls. Besides,” he added with a wink, “I bet you’d look pretty cute in a pair of overalls with a little paint on your cheeks.”

  Lucy laughed as little bubbles of excitement popped in her belly. When they’d first met, Dan seemed like the type to let others take the lead, but it was nice to see that he could be a little more forward if he tried.

  “Fine,” she agreed with a mock roll of her eyes. “I’ll ask Jo what she needs help with once she gets in.”

  Dan chuckled his approval. “And who knows? Maybe when you feel like taking a break, we can grab some lunch together?”

  Lucy raised an interested eyebrow at the proposal. This was a different man than the clumsy bear she’d met the night before. She approved. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

  “Good to hear,” he replied with a smirk before turning away to join the others in the garage. She couldn’t help watching him as he went, all toned muscle and pure brawn as he walked away.

  She wondered idly what would come of this, their budding attraction for one another. She wasn’t holding out hope for anything permanent. She’d painted herself as an asset to be used against Dominic and her cousin, Lucas. She had no way of telling what they’d think of her once the threat was eliminated, or if her help would eliminate it at all. Jo was nice, Nick was kind, and Dan was… nice, in more ways than one, but this pack didn’t quite fill the hole of the home she’d left behind. If they cut her loose once all was finished, she honestly wouldn’t be surprised.

  But how would Dan feel?

  She didn’t know if what they had now was worth worrying about, but she couldn’t stop the question from wafting through her mind. Would he care that she’d be gone? Or would something like her unwillingness to shift be enough for him to write her off forever? Her stomach churned uneasily at the possibility.

  “Well, he did ask me to lunch,” she reasoned quietly to herself, peeking out at Jo once more. She took solace in that fact; he must still have some bit of interest in her, even after that odd look he’d given her back at the cabin. Maybe there was something worth salvaging, even if only for the moment.

  She knew he’d probably want to talk about it soon. Some days even she didn’t fully understand why she was so hard fast on keeping her bear locked down, but deep down she knew it was for the best. Bears are predators, hunters, attackers. They measured their strength in power, not kindness—domination, not benevolence. That kind of mindset… corrupted people. They began to crave the fear, the, the subjugation, and called themselves privileged for it. Like it was some heavenly gift bestowed upon them solely for the purpose of enslaving those weaker than them. The shift to bear and back against always left whoever gave in a little less human, and it was terrifying to see, every time. It happened to her brother; she wouldn’t let it happen to her. That was that. If Dan hoped for anything to blossom between them, it was just something he’d have to accept.

  What if he didn’t? What then? Would she leave, or would she hold up her end of the bargain and trade information for safety? Could she handle being alone? These people were kind, even for strangers, and Dan had the possibility of being something more. Did she really want to throw that all away simply because of a petty personal preference?

  She shook the questions from her mind, clutching her hands to her chest in an effort to physically suppress her doubt. It had been so long since the bear was let out; it had a way of slipping uncertainty into her subconscious. She wouldn’t let it win. She couldn’t. No, not, not ever.

  Setting her shoulders, Lucy took in a long centering breath. There was only one way she could keep her unease from growing worse. She’d have to sit down calmly with Dan and fully explain her situation. She’d have to thoroughly convince him that this was who she was and if he expected anything more of her, then he would be sorely disappointed. They both needed to lay out their boundaries and expectations, because anything less would only be setting each other up for heartbreak. If she put anymore hope into this pack than what she already had, she didn’t know how badly it would break her if things fell apart right in front of her. She’d make damn sure she had all the information before taking another step forward with them… and especially with Dan.

  She glanced idly at her watch, heaving a sigh. It would be a few hours before she and Dan would be able to talk. Until then, she supposed she’d busy herself with some of the menial tasks he’d told her about before he left.

  As if on cue, Jo w
alked through the office doors, looking around expectantly with an arm full of paint brushes and tape. “Oh, you’re alone,” she said, giving Lucy a mildly confused look.

  “Yeah, well, I mean, I wasn’t but he — Dan left,” Lucy answered, giving Jo a perplexed look of her own. “You almost look disappointed.”

  Jo only grinned in response.

  ***

  “Oh, wonderful!” Savannah exited the back room of the office in a flurry of motion, making a beeline for the coffee pot that was stationed in the side of the room. “Fresh coffee!”

  Lucy had tasked herself with brewing a fresh pot after Nick’s second cup of the morning had drained it dry. She learned early on that the alpha pack of Woodhaven drank a lot of coffee. Mountain Haven, she corrected internally, chastising herself for falling back on her brother’s old terminology. If she was going to be a part of their pack, she didn’t want to drag any potentially bad habits into it. They were good people, untainted by the darkness of her old life. Until the day she left them behind, it was her job to keep it that way.

  She smiled happily at Savannah. “I couldn’t think of much else to do around here, so I’m happy to have helped some.”

  “Oh, never you worry,” Jo interjected with a smile as she ruffled though what looked like some flashcards of paint samples. “There’s plenty to be done around here. I’m sure you can tell by the mess that we’ve been doing a bit of remodeling.” She looked up from her stack of cards with an open smile. “Anything you can do to make this interior design disaster a little less painful would help me immensely!”