A Heart Full of Lies

by Nique Luarks

  Tone laughed. “Part of the reason I’m always busy is because, school takes up a lot of a niggas time.” He looked down at the floor then back at Erin.

  “School? As in college?”

  “Yea.”

  Erin smiled and crawled over to him. “Whaaat, my baby is a nerd, let me find out.” She kissed his neck.

  Tone laughed again. “Naw, I’m not a nerd. I’ve been in the streets my whole life Erin. It’s the same shit every day; I’m burnt out on it. I want a family, my own family. I want my wife and my mom’s to be proud of me as a man and what I’m doing with my life. A true man is not only a provider, he’s a leader and he leads by example Erin. One day, I’ma have a son, and he gone look to daddy to teach him how to be a man. I never had that, so I’m taking the necessary steps to make sure mines do.”

  Erin kissed his shoulders. “You are so perfect, I could see myself loving you.”

  “Aw, yea?” he licked his lips.

  “Yea, and I’m proud of you.”

  Tone sat her on his lap and kissed her face. “That’s all that matters.”

  Jeanette sorted through the laundry on her bed. Here it was, Thanksgiving night and Kory was nowhere to be found. The day had come and gone and not one phone call or text. She was tired of crying over him, and people questioning her sanity. She was mentally, emotionally, and physically tired.

  Jeanette thought about everything Erin said. About her being weak and having no common sense. She didn’t want to be labeled as that, and she wasn’t sure she could ever forgive Erin for saying that. She respected Erin, and all this time she thought the feeling was mutual, but she was wrong. Jeanette wiped the tears from eyes, and took another sip of her Bombay.

  Her phone rang and she rushed to it, slightly wishing maybe, just maybe Kory actually cared. “Hello?”

  “Ms. Marshall. This is Dr. Hendrix.”

  Jeanette looked over at her clock. “Dr. Hendrix is everything ok? It’s kind of late. The office was closed today for the holiday right?”

  “Of course, I was just calling to apologize again for startling you the other night. The look on your face keeps playing in my mind, I really scared you.”

  Jeanette sighed. “It’s ok. The crime rate has just been increasing, I thought I was about to be another victim.” She took little Kory’s clothes to his room.

  “Ok, well Happy Thanksgiving.”

  “Thank you Dr. Happy Thanksgiving to you too.” She waited for him to say something else but he didn’t. “Dr.?”

  “Yes, I’m sorry. Ms. Marshall.”

  “Yes?”

  “I know this is totally unprofessional, but can I take you to lunch sometime? If you aren’t seeing anybody, of course?” he asked.

  Jeanette looked around her empty house and at the floor. Technically she was more than seeing someone. But that same someone didn’t give a shit about her. She leaned against the wall. “Like just to talk, is my job on the line?”

  Dr. Hendrix chuckled. “Of course not, I just want to make up for the other night.”

  Jeanette went back to her own bedroom. “You don’t have to.”

  “I want to, if that’s alright with you.”

  Jeanette weighed her options, what did she have to lose. “Ok, sure.”

  “Great!” Dr. Hendrix said with much delight. “I mean, ok, I’ll keep in touch. Happy Thanksgiving again Ms. Marshall.”

  Jeanette smiled. “You too.” Hanging up the phone she realized what she’d just done. There was no way she could go through with it. She continued sorting through the clothes when she heard the front door open. She didn’t even bother getting up.

  Kory entered the room high and drunk. “What you cook?”

  Skyy held Deidra’s hand as she drove, with the biggest smile plastered on her face. The day had been a great turn out, and she now felt like her and Deidra’s relationship was official. At first her family gave them the side eye, but the only person she was concerned about was Deidra. As long as Deidra knew that she was ready, that was all that mattered. Now they were on the way to Deidra’s parents’ house so Skyy could meet them.

  Skyy kissed Deidra’s hand. “I love you.”

  Deidra smiled. “I love you too. Your people were really nice.” She laughed. “The look on your mom’s face at first was crazy.”

  Skyy laughed too. “Yea, I know. I thought she was about to spazz the fuck out.”

  Deidra nodded. “Right.”

  “And she kept Skylar for the weekend, she the real mvp.” She did a happy dance in her seat.

  Deidra laughed. “You silly. Lucky for you with my parents it won’t be that awkward because they know. I’ve just never really brought nobody home.”

  “Is there anything I should know about your mama and daddy before I met ‘em?”

  “Like what?”

  “Like, which one is the meanest? Is your mama going to like me? What kind of sports is your daddy into? I need to know something so I know how to approach them.” Skyy was starting to feel nervous.

  Deidra shrugged her shoulders. “My mama is the sweetest person you’ll ever meet. You’d rather meet her than Tone’s moms. They’re sisters but they’re like day and night. My daddy is a cool laid back nigga. He talks a lot too, so it’ll never be a dull moment.”

  “How long have they been married?”

  Deidra pulled up in front of a tall brick house. “Twenty years.” She turned the car off and looked over at Skyy. “You thinking too hard, my mama and daddy are the coolest people on the planet. I know they gone like you.” Deidra reassured her.

  They exited the car and made their way towards the door. Deidra knocked and they waited for someone to open the door.

  “Who is it?” a voice asked from behind the door.

  “Pops it’s me, open up.”

  The door opened and to Skyy’s surprise a familiar face stared back at her. She swallowed hard as her heart dropped to her feet, then gave a fake smile. She hadn’t seen Derick since the night Skylar was born, and never planned on seeing him again. But here he was and he was Deidra’s father too.

  Chapter Twelve: Back to Back

  Sasha cried as she hauled most of her clothes out the house she shared with Shawn. She couldn’t believe Shawn had spent Thanksgiving with his baby mama. She came back in the house pushing over the televisions in the living room and in their bedroom. She then went to the closet snatching all his clothes and putting them in the tub. “That muthafucka!”

  She practically ran to the wash room looking for the bleach. When her phone rang she answered it without even looking to see who it was. “WHAT!”

  Erin’s voice calmed her. “Sash, what’s the matter? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you. Did you get my messages?”

  Sasha cried even harder. “Erin, he… he still fuckin’ that bitch!” She snatched up the bleach heading back towards the bathroom.

  Erin sighed. “That’s what I wanted to talk about. You know my stylist Kayla, Milan is her baby sister and she was telling me-“

  “Erin I don’t even care. I’m done with Shawn, DONE!” she said, pouring the bleach over his clothes and shoes. “I can’t believe he had that bitch over his mom’s house today, playing fuckin’ family man!”

  “WHAT?!” Erin shouted.

  Sasha made sure every drop of the new container of bleach was in the tub, and then turned the water on filling the tub. “Erin, he hasn’t even called me, he don’t even care.” She sat down on the toilet crying.

  “Sash you want me to come get you? I’m on my way.” Erin jumped up.

  Sasha put the phone down and continued weeping.

  Tone watched as Erin frantically put on sweats and her tennis shoes. “What’s the matter?” He rubbed his eyes. When Erin didn’t answer him he sat up straight. “Where are you going?”

  Erin wiped her eyes. “I need to get to Sasha.”

  Tone stood and walked over to her, “Why you crying? What’s wrong with Sasha?” He grabbed her face.

  Erin
pushed away from him. “I gotta go I’ll be back.”

  Tone grasped her wrist. “Chill, you crying, all upset and shit. You not going nowhere until you tell me what the fuck is going on with Sasha.” He gave her a firm look.

  “Shawn is cheating on her, I don’t know all the details, but I need to be with her. She can’t be there by herself.” She remembered how crushed Sasha was when she found out Shawn cheated the first time.

  Tone let her go, “Hold on let me put my shoes and shit on.” Erin watched as he got dressed and tucked his gun in his waist. “Come on love, and stop crying, she’ll be aight.”

  Erin used her key and entered Sasha’s house. “Sash!” she called out. Turning on the lights she made her way to her room. When she didn’t see her, she called out for her again, “Sasha!”

  She stepped into the hallway and heard water running in the bathroom. She rushed down the hall and pushed the door open. “Sas-.“ Sasha was lying on the floor in a big puddle of water crying.

  Erin turned the water off and sat down next to Sasha. “Sasha.” Erin sniffled as tears ran down her cheeks. “You gotta get up Sash. I know it hurts, but you gotta get up ma.” She rubbed Sasha’s back.

  “E, I feel so stupid.”

  Erin hung her head feeling Sasha’s pain. “You’re not stupid. He is.” She looked up as Tone stood in the doorway.

  “Erin, help her get her stuff so we can go.” He took a deep breath and shook his head sadly as he walked away.

  Erin held Sasha. “We can sit here all night, if you want. I’m not going anywhere without you.” Sasha cried loudly as Erin rocked her back and forth.

  Skyy sat at her kitchen table, trying to focus on the book she was reading but couldn’t. How could she? Just a couple days ago she’d found out Skylar and Deidra shared the same father. Her mind was racing, how could this be happening? Derick played it off so well, acting as though he’d never met her. Even though she had no idea he was Deidra’s father before that night, she felt as though she’d betrayed Deidra.

  She put the book down. How was she going to tell Deidra? She knew she had to before her father did. Would Deidra be done with her? Skyy laid her head on the table. “I should’ve told her.”

  “Should’ve told who?” Deidra said.

  Skyy jumped. “Nothing, this damn book.” She avoided eye contact.

  Deidra put on her jacket. “Oh. I’m ‘bouta go, me and Tone going to St. Louis for the weekend.” She kissed Skyy. “I’ll call you when we make it, ok?”

  Skyy shook her head ok. When she was sure Deidra was gone she called Erin. When she didn’t answer she called Sasha, and when Sasha didn’t answer she was pissed. She tried Erin again and left a message. “Bitch, call me. You won’t believe the shit I’m going through right now.” She hung up and sent the message through a text to her and Sasha.

  She made her way to her room so she could get some sleep before work. Skyy was absolutely sure nobody’s life sucked as bad as hers.

  Erin glanced inside the guest bedroom Sasha had been sleeping in. She truly felt for her best friend. Sasha wouldn’t eat, or talk and she was starting to get worried about her. The past two days her only concern had been Sasha, causing her to call in to work. Shawn had called Erin asking if Sasha was ok, but Erin knew deep down he knew the answer to that stupid question. Sasha could stay with her forever if she wanted; Erin just wished she’d talk to her.

  She made her way down the hall nearly knocking Tone over as he came out the room. “I’m sorry.” She noticed he had his overnight bag. “You leaving?”

  Tone nodded. “Yea, I gotta head to St. Louis for a couple days and take care of some business.”

  Erin gave him a confused look. “A couple days? Why am I just now finding out about this Santonio?” She was tired of being the last one to know what was going on with him.

  “Man, Erin don’t start that. You know my work is on call.” He stared down at her.

  Erin shifted. “Whatever.” She tried to push past him.

  He grabbed her. “Quit pouting. You know daddy gone be right back. Plus you can take this time to be alone with Sasha. Homegirl is hurting.” He looked down the hallway at Sasha’s room.

  Erin shrugged her shoulders. “Ok, drive safe, and don’t do anything stupid.”

  Tone hugged her. “When I get back, me and you going on a trip.”

  Erin giggled. “A trip? I can’t take off work; they’re not approving time right now.” The sound of a trip was bomb, but Erin was realistic, there was no way she was going to lose her job, for nobody.

  Tone shook his head at her, but respected her grind. “Aight, but we gone do something special.” He kissed her, sucking on her tongue. “Damn I’ma miss you.”

  Skyy pulled up in front of the club and put her car in park. She didn’t know why but it was something about the club that brought her to life. Maybe it was the fact that here, nobody cared about your fuck ups and nobody tried to act like their shit was perfect. She got out her car and she could hear the music booming from the parking lot.

  She made her way through the doors and straight to the bar. The strippers would stop her occasionally and ask where she’d been, but it felt good to be back. The only reason she’d not been coming to work because Deidra had her so wrapped up. And now with this whole Derick situation, Skyy needed to get out the house and throw a few shots back. Her boss Tanya was behind the bar making drinks when Skyy sat down.

  “Sup Tanya, you miss me?”

  Tanya shook her head. “Bitch where you have been? I thought you quit. Sheen been asking about you.” Tanya was referring to the club owner.

  Skyy took her jacket off and made her way behind the bar. “Fuck Sheen’s little dick ass. I was going through a lot. I needed a break.” she yelled over the music

  She poured herself a shot and directed her attention to the stage. Juicy was on the pole doing her thing as usual. Men were drooling like dogs, throwing money. Skyy respected the hustle of a stripper, but she could never be one. She didn’t have the body like them, and her pride wouldn’t let her hop on a stage in front of a room full of people butt ass naked.

  Skyy took another shot then began to tend to the thirsty customers at the bar. She reached under the bar for more cups and when she stood back up her heart nearly jumped out her chest. Derick was sitting right in front of her, with a smug look on his face.

  He grinned. “Long time, no see.”

  Skyy rolled her eyes, and yelled over the music, “What can I get you to drink?” She couldn’t help but notice how fine he was. Even on Thanksgiving she’d stole a glance or two at him here and there.

  Derick tapped the bar. “Let me get a Blue Mothafucka.”

  Skyy began whipping up the drink as Derick spoke. “So you and Deidra huh? How long have you known she was my daughter Skyy?”

  Skyy poured the drink into a cup and slid it to him. “I didn’t know Derick. You think I would’ve came to your fuckin’ house had I known I was in a relationship with your daughter?” Skyy was pissed.

  Derick took a sip. “Did you tell her?” When she shook her head no, he frowned. “When are you going to tell her? We can’t keep this from her.” he continued sipping.

  Skyy wanted to punch him in his throat, but instead gave him a hard stare. “I’ll tell her when the time is right. How was I supposed to know her daddy was the deadbeat daddy to my child? You do know Deidra isn’t your only child right? Oh you must’ve forgot, you got a three year old daughter!” she yelled in his face.

  Derick raised his hands. “You’re the one who cut me and off and disappeared.”

  “You were married!” Old feelings resurfaced causing her to tear up. “You led me on Derick. Saying we would be a family, the whole time your old ass was “happily” married. And just because I changed my number and moved, didn’t mean shit, you know where I work.”

  “Where is she?” he asked.

  Skyy frowned. “Who?”

  “Skylar? How has she been? I want to be a part of her
life.”

  Skyy laughed disgusted, “Are you fucking serious? NO!”

  Derick finished off his drink. “Look, we can do this the easy way or the hard way Skyy. Deidra needs to know about us and I want to be in Skylar’s life. She deserves all the same things Deidra got, and I’m trying to step up to the plate and make it better.”

  Skyy couldn’t believe this was happening. “Get the fuck out of here! You’re a fucking joke.” Tears filled her eyes. “You just keep ruining my life.”

  Tanya stood beside her. “You ok? You need me to get one of the bouncers girl?”

  Skyy shook her head no, “Naw, he ‘bouta go.” She watched as he pulled a pen out his pocket and wrote his number down.

  “Skyy call me. I’ll let you tell Deidra, but I’m not going to wait forever.”

  Jeanette shuffled through the papers on her desk, as Amina complained. The least of her worries were Amina’s problems. All day Jeanette had been trying to avoid Dr. Hendrix even though she knew it would be almost impossible. He’d called to ask her out and they’d yet to set an official date. She was relieved, but at the same time disappointed.

  Amina tapped her. “Hello? Did you hear what I said?”

  Jeanette faced her. “What you say?”

  Amina frowned. “Really? I said Tone been acting real funny lately. He won’t even have sex with me. How am I supposed to get pregnant if he won’t even fuck me?”

  Jeanette grabbed a folder and stood up. “You still trying?” she said shaking her head.

  Amina sucked her teeth, “He won’t do it, and all he let me do is suck his dick. Is he still messing with Erin? Cause every time I bring it up, he just laughs it off.”

  Jeanette shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I haven’t even been talking to Skyy.” She called the patient’s name and waited for them to come to the window. “Amina let it go.”

  Once the patient came to the window Jeanette asked them to come through the door so she could walk them back to the Dr. Jeanette opened the door and let the patient into the room.

  She looked through the folder. “Ok, Ms. Williams, you’re here because, you said you missed a period. Are they usually on time every month?”