Wife for Hire

by Dianne Blacklock

  ‘Mum, where are you? Didn’t you get my message? Call me as soon as you get home . . . it’s Jess.’

  The other ten would be the same, only progressively more hysterical no doubt. Sam decided to ring Jeff’s mobile. She didn’t want to risk Jodi answering the house phone.

  ‘Jeff Holmes.’

  ‘Hello, it’s me.’

  ‘Hi. Jess has been trying to reach you.’

  ‘So I gather.’

  ‘Your mobile was turned off. You’re always doing that. You should get into the habit of leaving it on, Sam.’

  ‘Then I forget about it, the battery runs out and it doesn’t work when I need it.’

  ‘But what’s the use of having a phone if you never turn it on?’

  A lecture from Jeff was the last thing she needed right now.

  ‘Anyway,’ Sam said dismissively, ‘can you get Jess for me, please?’

  ‘I’ll put her on.’

  ‘Mu-umm! Where have you been?’ Jessica whined. ‘I’ve called you like, a thousand times! And I’ve left like, a million messages!’

  ‘Jess, I have my own life too,’ Sam returned. ‘Now what’s the big emergency?’

  ‘You have to tape Channel 22 at six o’clock.’

  ‘Please Mum,’ Sam added.

  ‘Please Mum!’ Jessica repeated, exasperated.

  ‘Why didn’t you just ask your father?’

  ‘They don’t have Pay TV, they don’t even have a DVD player!’ Jess dropped her voice. ‘It’s pretty third world around here, I mean Josh has to sleep on a sofa bed in the living room. But we’ll be okay. Don’t worry about us.’

  Sam would do her best.

  ‘What am I taping?’

  ‘In Depth with Britney Spears.’

  ‘That’s a bit of an oxymoron.’

  ‘She’s not a moron,’ Jessica huffed. ‘I don’t make fun of your stupid, pathetic old people’s music.’

  ‘Is Ellie there?’ asked Sam, ignoring Jess while she didn’t make fun of stupid, pathetic old people’s music. ‘Could I speak to her?’

  ‘Okay, but don’t forget, will you, Mum? Channel –’

  ‘22 at six o’clock,’ Sam finished. ‘I won’t forget.’ She never did.

  ‘Thanks Mum. Here’s Ellie.’

  ‘Hi Mummy!’

  ‘Hello sweetheart. Are you having a nice time?’

  ‘Yes. But I miss you.’

  ‘I miss you too.’

  Sam could hear Jeff coaxing in the background.

  ‘I have to go, Mummy, we’re going to the beach.’

  ‘Have fun. See you tomorrow.’

  Sam waited until she heard Ellie hang up. Then she walked out to the family room, scanned the row of videotapes, neatly stacked and labelled, and found one that could be taped over. She checked the guide and programmed the VCR to start recording at six p.m. Sam and Josh were the only ones in the family who could program the VCR. Why people made such a fuss about it was beyond her. You simply read the manual and followed the steps.

  She grabbed a basket from the laundry and walked upstairs. She gathered up Jess and Josh’s uniforms from where they had dropped them on the floor, plus other stray bits of clothing. She came downstairs again and started up the washing machine, measured out the powder and added it to the surging water. She separated the clothes into two piles, carefully shook out each item and placed them one at a time into the machine, watching as the water eddied and tossed them around, eventually sucking them under.

  There is the woman whose husband left her. She needs to get a life.

  Sunday afternoon

  Sam saw Jeff’s car as it pulled into the driveway, because she’d been looking out since four, even though Jeff had said he would have the kids home between four-thirty and five. She’d made their favourites for dinner – potato casserole and chicken schnitzels, which was way too much fat and starch for one meal. But it wouldn’t hurt this once. The house was cleaned from top to bottom. Washing and ironing was all done and put away, school lunches made, labelled and packed in the freezer. It would leave a bit of a hole in her schedule for the week, but she’d had to keep busy. She had made it through Saturday with no ill effects from the medication, but she’d slept badly last night, and all day the nausea had come in waves. Sam found if she stopped to rest, her mind wandered to why she had to take the damned pills in the first place. Or worse, the kids there at Jeff’s place, the faceless figure of Jodi cooking them dinner, reading Ellie a story, listening to CDs with Jess, laughing with Josh . . .

  Sam walked to the front door and opened it wide. Jeff was helping Ellie out of the car while the older two got their bags from the boot.

  ‘Hi,’ she called.

  ‘Hi there,’ Jeff returned.

  Josh sauntered across the lawn towards her, carrying his backpack and skateboard.

  ‘Hi mate, did you have a good time?’ Sam asked brightly.

  He grunted in what she postulated was a reasonably positive manner.

  ‘Bye Josh,’ Jeff called.

  Josh made another noise as he walked into the house. Jeff didn’t try to stop him or admonish him. That was progress.

  Ellie ran over to her mother. ‘Hi Mummy, I missed you.’

  Sam picked her up, hugging her tight. ‘Not as much as I missed you!’

  Jeff was helping Jessica carry an assortment of bags and paraphernalia into the entry.

  ‘My God Jess, what on earth did you take with you? You were only going for a weekend.’

  ‘I didn’t know what I’d need. I’ve never been there before,’ she defended.

  ‘It’s okay,’ said Jeff good-naturedly, ruffling her hair.

  Alright for him, but Sam knew that all the clothes would be dumped in the laundry hamper whether Jess had worn them or not.

  ‘Did you tape my show?’ asked Jess breathlessly.

  ‘Of course. How about a “Hi Mum, how are you, nice to see you”?’

  ‘Hi Mum,’ she groaned, but she was smiling, not rolling her eyes for a change. She kissed Sam on the cheek and then turned to her father. ‘Bye Daddy.’

  Jeff hugged her. ‘I’ll talk to you through the week, sweetheart.’

  He kissed Ellie goodbye and both the girls skittered off inside.

  ‘It went well,’ Jeff said when they were alone. He looked quite pleased with himself. Sam felt like slapping him. ‘I think they had fun. Even Josh.’

  So now he thought he was Father of the Year.

  ‘How was your weekend?’

  ‘Oh, the usual – cleaning, cooking, washing.’ That was as much as she was ever going to tell him.

  ‘You should have had a break.’

  ‘Sure,’ Sam scoffed. ‘Leave it all to the maid, eh?’

  He shook his head. ‘I just think you overdo it sometimes. You need to learn to relax. Everything doesn’t have to be so . . . perfect.’

  So, she was too perfect? She wished her mother could have heard that. Slapping him was too good. Patronising bastard.

  ‘Well, real life beckons,’ Sam said breezily. ‘I’d best go in.’

  He nodded. ‘See you.’

  She walked inside and closed the door, not waiting to watch him drive away.

  ‘Mum, you should have seen it, it was amazing!’ Jessica had not stopped talking about Bondi throughout dinner. ‘It’s like, exactly like it is in Beachside!’

  ‘That’s because it is the place in Beachside, you moron,’ said Josh.

  ‘What would you know?’

  ‘More than you do, retard.’

  ‘Now you two,’ Sam interrupted. ‘I hope you weren’t bickering like this at your father’s. What would Jodi think?’ She was desperate to get information about Jodi without seeming, well, desperate. Just how young was she? Was she tall, taller than Sam? More than likely. Was she blonde, blue-eyed, reed slim and wrinkle-free? Was she everything that Sam was not? Or everything that Sam had once been? She took a deep breath, composing herself. ‘I’m sure she’s too young to have had much to d
o with kids your age.’

  ‘She’s not young, Mum. She’s old.’

  Sam knew that didn’t mean anything. Anyone over eighteen was old to Jessica.

  ‘Jess was saying you had to sleep out in the living room, Josh. Did that bother you?’

  He shrugged. ‘Nuh. There’s a good skate bowl up the road. And Dad said he’ll get his old boards from Grandma’s and we can go surfing next time.’

  Well, there you go, thought Sam as she got up to clear the table. It had all turned out alright. So why did she feel hollow? Did she want the kids to have a bad time? What kind of a mother would that make her? But she wondered if it was alright to hope that they would prefer to be with her?

  ‘Mummy?’

  Sam had just finished reading to Ellie and was smoothing out her quilt, tucking the sheet in tightly, just the way she liked it.

  ‘Mm?’

  ‘I don’t like Jodi.’

  ‘Oh?’ She tried to suppress the bubble of glee that rose up in her chest, berating herself for being so childish. She sat down on the bed. ‘Why not?’

  Ellie thought about it for a moment. ‘Well, she’s doesn’t smell like you, Mummy.’

  ‘People don’t all smell the same. You just have to get used to her.’

  ‘And she didn’t tuck me in. Daddy had to do it.’

  Sam smiled. ‘Daddy probably wanted to do it.’

  ‘But he doesn’t never tuck me in.’

  ‘Some things are going to change, Ellie. When you visit Daddy he’ll probably do a lot of things he didn’t do before, because I’m not there to do them.’ Was she making sense? ‘He is your daddy after all, but she’s not your mother.’ There, that was clearer.

  ‘Is that all that bothered you?’ Sam couldn’t help asking.

  Ellie screwed up her face, thinking. ‘Mm, she’s got hair under her arms. Like mens do.’

  There was a concept. ‘Ladies grow hair under their arms, too.’

  ‘You don’t. You’re smooth.’

  ‘Because I shave.’

  Ellie’s eyes widened. ‘Why do you do that?’

  ‘So that I’ll be smooth.’

  ‘Why doesn’t Jodi shave then?’

  Because she’s probably a sprout-eating, hippie feminazi. ‘Ladies don’t have to shave, Ellie, if they don’t want to.’

  Ellie pulled a face. ‘It’s yucky.’

  ‘It’s not yucky,’ Sam chided gently. ‘It’s . . . natural.’ She leaned down to kiss her. ‘And it’s time for sleep. See you in the morning.’

  Sam walked to the door, turning back to look at her daughter before switching off the light.

  ‘Mummy?’

  ‘Yes sweetheart?’

  ‘I like being with Daddy.’ She paused. ‘But I like it here more, with you. Is that alright?’

  Sam felt a welling in her chest. ‘Of course, it’s perfectly alright.’

  Monday

  ‘Sam, it’s Alex.’

  ‘Hi.’ Sam had been expecting this call. That didn’t mean she was any the more prepared for it.

  ‘Well, how are you?’

  ‘Um, okay.’

  There was a moment of silence. She hadn’t expected her elder sister to be awkward about this.

  ‘Yes, alright, go ahead with that.’ Sam realised then that Alex was in fact involved in another conversation.

  ‘Sorry about that,’ she said to Sam. ‘You’d think I could have one phone call without being interrupted.’

  ‘I know what you mean.’

  ‘Pardon?’

  ‘About trying to talk on the phone without being interrupted,’ Sam explained.

  ‘By whom?’

  ‘Well, the kids usually.’

  ‘Oh, yes, of course,’ Alex dismissed. ‘The children, how are they?’

  ‘Fine. They seem to be coping alright, so far.’

  ‘Good. Now the reason I’m calling is that I have business in Sydney later this week. I’d like to see you. How is 4.15 to 5.00 p.m. Thursday for you?’

  ‘Four-fifteen to five? Couldn’t she be more specific?’ said Max, arching an eyebrow. She was perched on the kitchen bench with her feet on a stool, watching Sam cook dinner.

  ‘Can you be here?’ Sam pleaded.

  ‘No, I’m sure I’m going to be busy.’

  ‘I don’t want to cope with her on my own.’

  ‘You’ll be fine. She likes you more than she likes me.’

  ‘Why do you say that?’

  Max shrugged. ‘She thinks I’m a flake. Whereas you are a respectable married woman.’

  ‘Not any more,’ she sighed.

  ‘What does Aunty Alex do, Mum?’ asked Jess, coming back into the room from setting the table.

  Sam and Max frowned at each other.

  ‘She’s a management consultant,’ Sam explained.

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘Well,’ she glanced at Max. ‘She goes to meetings . . .’

  ‘And she has an assistant,’ Max offered.

  ‘She has to make a lot of decisions.’

  ‘And give orders,’ added Max. ‘She’s good at that, she had plenty of practice on us when we were kids.’

  ‘Do me a favour, Jess,’ said Sam. ‘Don’t repeat that when your aunty’s here, will you?’

  Jess grinned. ‘How much are you gonna pay me?’

  ‘Cheek!’ Sam called after her as she left the kitchen. She looked back at Max, frowning.

  ‘What?’

  ‘Won’t you come, please?’

  Max shook her head, springing down off the bench. ‘Can’t possibly, darling,’ she said, affecting an officious tone that made her sound uncannily like Alex. ‘Have an appointment with my business manager about my stock portfolio, don’t you know.’ She opened the fridge. ‘Got anything to drink?’

  4.15 p.m. Thursday

  Sam took a deep breath and opened the front door.

  ‘Hi Alex!’ she said brightly.

  ‘Samantha, good to see you.’ Alex leaned forward offering her cheek for Sam to kiss, but withdrawing before they actually connected.

  Everyone said Sam and Alex were most alike out of the three sisters, but Sam suspected that was only because they were both short. Alex was an upmarket version of Sam. She frequented designer boutiques while Sam shopped at department stores, she wore expensive suits, while Sam didn’t even own a suit, she had her hair styled by someone who featured in the social pages of the Sunday papers, while Sam found that pulling hers back in a clip allowed her to go longer between hairdressing appointments. There was no mistaking that Alex was a high-flyer, just as there was no mistaking that Sam was a suburban mum.

  ‘Come in,’ said Sam, as Alex walked past her into the house.

  Jess and Ellie were standing to attention in the living room.

  ‘Hello Aunty Alex,’ they chorused.

  ‘Jessica, Eloise, look how you’ve grown,’ she said perfunctorily. She stooped to offer her cheek, but they didn’t quite make it to her either before she straightened up again. ‘And Joshua, where is he?’ she said, turning to Sam.

  ‘Out on his skateboard,’ she explained. ‘He’ll be along soon.’

  ‘Okay then.’ Alex stood for a moment, expectantly.

  ‘Would you like coffee, tea?’

  ‘Mm,’ she contemplated. ‘I suppose you don’t have an espresso machine . . . No, don’t worry. Tea will be fine.’

  She followed Sam into the kitchen and put her handbag down on the bench. Sam filled the kettle and plugged it in. She reached for the loose tea canister and a pot. Alex might keel over if she used teabags. She took out some cups, the sugar, milk. When there was nothing else to do, she turned around to face her sister. Alex had perched herself on a stool, crossing her legs elegantly, her back straight as a flagpole.

  ‘So Samantha, tell me how you are really?’

  She sighed. ‘As you would expect.’

  ‘I have no expectations, dear. I hardly saw you and Jeffrey together, I wouldn’t know if you were happy or
not, if he’d been unfaithful before. I don’t know if he beat you. I don’t know anything.’ She spoke like a round of bullets being fired out of a machine gun. ‘Why don’t you go ahead and tell me?’

  Sam crossed her arms in front of her. ‘He has never hit me, Alex. It’s nothing like that.’

  ‘Good.’

  ‘I don’t think he’s been unfaithful before, but how would I know?’

  ‘You would know.’

  ‘I didn’t know this time.’

  Alex frowned. ‘So, you’d grown apart?’

  ‘Why do you say that?’

  ‘Well, if you didn’t know your husband was having an affair, I would think a certain distance had come between you.’

  Sam poured the boiled water into the teapot and carried it across to the bench where Alex was sitting. ‘I suppose,’ she shrugged. She turned back for the cups.

  ‘Sam, you were a child when you married. Of course it was bound to fail.’

  Sam frowned, setting a cup down in front of Alex and pouring the tea. They’d had some good years. She didn’t like to think they’d been doomed from the start.

  ‘What I’m saying is,’ Alex continued, ‘you’ve been married since you were too young to make so important a decision. You had children straightaway. It’s not surprising that things would . . . unravel, over time.’

  Sam sipped her tea.

  ‘But I don’t want you thinking of yourself as a failure.’

  ‘Like Mum does.’

  ‘She’s just bitter. Don’t pay any attention to her.’

  Sam was surprised. She thought Alex and Bernice were as thick as thieves.

  ‘You’re too much like her, is the problem,’ Alex informed her.

  She didn’t particularly want to hear that.

  ‘You were the pretty one, but smart too, though you never used your brains. You just got married and had babies.’

  ‘But why should that bother Mum? That’s what she did.’

  ‘Exactly. She expected more of you. You deserved better than Jeffrey, you deserve better than what he’s done to you.’

  Sam was bewildered. All these opinions held by everyone and she never had any idea.