Suited For Love

by Coleman, Lynn A.

  “Night, Krispin.”

  ❧

  The next morning Jess got up thirty minutes earlier to gather in the lobsters. By midmorning she was done. She went home, showered, and drove to the hospital to meet Randi and Jordan’s little one. The joy on the parents’ faces was so contagious Jess also beamed. “She’s beautiful,” Jess whispered.

  “Yeah, she is.” Jordan clicked off a couple of pictures of Jess, Randi, and Ella Ruth, Squabbin Bay’s newest resident.

  “Would you like to hold her?” Randi offered.

  “Love to. Do I need to put on a gown or something?”

  “No, just wash your hands; that will be fine.” Randi handed her daughter over to Jess with a gentle kiss on the forehead.

  Jess cradled the tiny bundle in her arms. “I don’t think I’ve ever held someone so tiny.”

  A long moment of silence filled the room, broken only by Jordan’s clicking of the camera. “How do you put up with that?”

  Randi laughed. “I’m still getting used to it.”

  “It looks like she’ll have Randi’s dark eyes.” Jordan beamed. “See how black the irises are?”

  Randi had a very unique characteristic in her nearly black eyes. And Jess knew that Jordan had always been fascinated by them. They reminded him of his Native American great-grandmother. “They’re beautiful.”

  “Mom said my eyes were black when I was first born, too,” Randi admitted.

  Ella Ruth started to squirm. Her little fists poked out of the blanket. Her face scrunched up, and a little yelp came out.

  “Must be feeding time.” Jess handed the baby back to Randi. “She’s very beautiful. You guys must be so pleased.”

  “The Lord’s blessed us. She’s fine. They’re watching her bilirubin count to make sure her liver is working fine, but all indications are that she’ll be able to leave the hospital with Randi tomorrow.”

  Jess stayed a few minutes longer. But Ella Ruth was hungry, so Jess left to allow Randi to breastfeed her baby.

  The desire to have her own little one occupied her thoughts on the drive home. She’d never been one to ooh and ahh over an infant, but this one hit closer to home. Her best friend was now a mother. Jess didn’t even have a prospect for a husband.

  She went to the office and worked on co-op business until old Ben Costa came in. “Hey there, Jess. Is your dad around?” Ben had retired a couple years ago, but he kept his boat and a couple pots just to keep himself busy.

  “I believe he’s out at the old Ford place. What’s up?”

  “Nothin’ really. Just saw your grandpa in town, and I wanted to make sure he was aware.”

  Jess sighed. Her grandfather’s summer of stealing the other lobstermen’s lobsters had been hardest on her father, but Ben had suffered a lot, too. Even worse, that same summer, a couple of teens running fast and loose had set his house on fire. Then old Ben himself had left his cigar burning and the gas on in his boat, and he had lost that, as well. Thankfully, Ben’s insurance covered a large portion of his losses. “We know. Daddy has Grandpa and Grandma living at the house with them.”

  “Has he been able to kick that nasty habit?”

  “Yes. Grandpa goes to Gamblers Anonymous regularly, and Grandma takes care of the finances.”

  “Good. Your grandpa was a good man. Nothing like sin to cloud a man’s judgment. Well, that’s all. I just wanted to be sure.”

  “No problem, Ben. Come by any time.”

  Ben waved as he shuffled down the steps. For a man in his seventies, he was spry enough. Jess noticed he held the railing tightly as he took each step. At the same time, she noticed Krispin Black walking into the Dockside Grill. She wondered if he ever cooked for himself. She’d seen him many times coming out of the restaurant with a meal to go.

  Jess looked back at the quarterlies. The income this year was better than last. The number of lobsters harvested was a bit more, but not too much more. One thing Jess had learned early on was not to glut the market with too much lobster.

  Mark Bisbee ran the warehouse for the co-op. Jess placed a call to him. “Hi, Mark. How’s it going?”

  “Fine, fine. Orders are coming in steady. And so far we’ve had enough lobster to meet the needs.”

  “Wonderful. Did you receive the order I faxed from the Weathervane Restaurants?”

  “Ayup, got it right here. You gave them a mighty nice price.”

  “Yeah, we’ll lose a nickel a lobster, but I think the size of the order will keep us in the black.”

  “No doubt. They have restaurants in three states now, and they’re still growing. They like getting the freshest lobsters they can.”

  “And we aim to please. Thanks, Mark. Keep me posted.”

  “Will do. Talk with you later. Bye.”

  Jess listened to the disconnection hum for a moment, then placed the phone back in its holder. With her work done, she looked out at the harbor. The ocean was calm. The prospect of paddling her kayak through the waters seemed like a good idea. She locked up the office and ran over to the boathouse where she and her father stored their kayaks along with all their fishing equipment during the summer months. Within minutes she was dressed in her wetsuit and carrying her kayak over her head to the small dock.

  Once inside, she paddled her way through the harbor and over to Krispin’s warehouse. She pulled the boat up onto the small dock outside his building and knocked on the seaside door.

  A moment later, Greg Steadman appeared. “Hi, Jess. What can I do you for?”

  “Uh, I was looking for Krispin.”

  “He’s here. Hang on.”

  Greg slipped behind the gray weathered boards that made up the door. A couple of minutes later, Krispin appeared. “Hi, Jess. What’s up?”

  “I thought maybe you’d like to go kayaking with me. But I see you’re busy.”

  “Afraid so. Greg’s teaching me how to use a router.”

  “Ah. Well, I won’t keep you. See you around.” Jess headed back to her kayak.

  “Jess?”

  Jess turned back.

  “Thanks for the offer. Maybe some other time.”

  “Of course.”

  Why, why, why, did I do that? He’s going to think I’m chasing him now. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

  Jess worked her way out of the harbor and to a small island that she and Randi used to play on when they were younger. They had made a small hut out of driftwood. Jess found the remains of a childhood castle and the makings of a new fort by some other child. Upon closer inspection, some of the missing wood had come from their castle. Jess smiled.

  She sat down on a rock and drew in the sand with a stick. She wasn’t a child any longer. The days of kings and queens, princes and princesses were long gone. She was a woman, alone in this world. Alone for the very first time. She scanned the harbor. Boats of all different shapes and sizes painted the horizon. She knew most of the people on those vessels, so why did she feel so alone?

  Her father was married now. Her best friend was married and had a baby. The co-op didn’t demand every waking minute she had, and even lobstering only took up a small amount of her time each day. She was bored. Alone and bored was not a good combination in Squabbin Bay.

  Was it time to send out her résumé again? Was it time to go back to corporate America and enter the business she’d gone to school for?

  The co-op still needed her, she argued. She had a place in Squabbin Bay. So why was she so uncomfortable here now?

  The ever so delightful image of Krispin Black flooded her senses. Lord, it isn’t fair. Why am I attracted to men who don’t put You first in their lives?

  Eight

  Krispin watched Jess paddle away. Why does she keep coming around?

  “Penny for your thoughts?”

  Startled, Krispin turned back toward Greg. “Sorry.”

  “What’s the matter, Krispin? Have you not forgiven yourself?”

  “It’s not that. I’ve been trying real hard to avoid Jessica Kearns. And now s
he’s stopping by. Why would she do that?”

  Greg chuckled. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe she likes you.”

  “She’s afraid of me.”

  “Pardon?”

  Krispin sighed, then filled Greg in on his and Jess’s conversation yesterday.

  “So let me get this straight. You promised not to say or do anything crude, rude, or socially unacceptable to her, and you’re confused by her appearance here this morning?”

  Krispin nodded.

  “Seems obvious to me. She’s attracted to you.”

  “But—”

  Greg raised one of his beefy fingers. “You’re redeemed, Krispin. But if you were as rude as you said you were, I imagine your bigger problem will be getting past her father.”

  Krispin plopped down on a stool. Going head to head with Wayne Kearns, confessing his sin toward his daughter, struck him as both undesirable and impossible.

  “Tell ya what. I’m going to go home now. Give this matter some prayer and thought. Wayne has a real talent with wood. You might want to ask for his help.”

  Krispin shook his head no. “I asked for you to be my mentor.”

  “I wasn’t saying I’d stop being your mentor. You’re a good man, Krispin. Your heart has changed since the day of the accident. Relax and give yourself a break. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Greg left without a further word. Krispin sat in a quandary. He liked Jess. No, he loved Jess. But he had to admit he didn’t feel good enough for her. Compounding the problem, he respected Wayne. What father would want to know the unholy thoughts a man has entertained or, in his case, said to his daughter? Yet was it the right course of action? Should he apologize to Wayne? Should he seek Wayne’s blessing to pursue a relationship with Jess? Should he even consider a relationship with Jess?

  Yesterday he thought they could be friends. Today the very thought of it scared him.

  He spent the next few minutes in prayer, then closed up the shop and went home. What he didn’t expect to see was Wayne Kearns’s truck in his driveway. His posture was noticeably rigid.

  “Mr. Kearns.”

  “Mr. Black,” Wayne’s voice strained.

  “What can I do for you?”

  “I want to know what kind of a game you’re playing with my daughter, Mr. Black. You’ve seemed to convince Pastor Russell you’re a changed man, but frankly, I don’t see it.”

  Krispin sighed. “What exactly are you not sure of? Would you like to go inside while we talk?”

  Wayne nodded. “Look, I’m sure you’re a good enough person. You did drop the lawsuit… .”

  “I never filed one,” Krispin interjected.

  “Right. Okay, but why did you come to Squabbin Bay?”

  Krispin let out a nervous chuckle and held the door open to his cottage. “Because of you.”

  “Me?”

  “Yeah. It’s a long story. Well, perhaps not that long. But would you like a soft drink or something?”

  “Sure. Got any beer?”

  “No. You drink beer?”

  “No, but I was checking if you did.”

  “Ah.” Krispin held the door of the refrigerator open. “Here ya go. You’re free to search my cabinets, too. Now if you’d come at the time of the accident, that would be a different story.”

  “Gotcha. Let’s sit down, Mr. Black.”

  They went into the living room. Wayne sat on the couch with his legs spread and elbows resting on his knees. “Jason says you’ve prayed for salvation. Why?”

  “Because I came to realize I wasn’t happy with my life. I’ve had fortune and fame, as they say. Although my fame is really in the work I’ve done, but I’ve lived a lifestyle that was very worldly. Things came easy for me…too easy. But I was empty. And my short time in Squabbin Bay showed me another side of life, the ability to be content with little, to enjoy who and where you are. And frankly, your words drove me to reconsider my life.”

  Wayne relaxed. “So you’ve really given your life to the Lord?”

  “Yes, sir. You can ask Greg Steadman. He’s my mentor, and he’s been helping me in the shop.”

  Wayne smiled. “I already spoke with Greg.”

  Krispin knitted his eyebrows. “Then why—”

  “I’m a father concerned for his daughter. Jess shared with Dena, and I know you propositioned her on more than one occasion.”

  Krispin felt his face grow hot with humiliation. “I’m really sorry. I was totally out of line.”

  “Yes, you were.”

  “Mr. Kearns, I am attracted to Jess. But I don’t want a woman in my life right now. I don’t think I can handle it.”

  Krispin felt the weight of Wayne’s scrutinizing gaze.

  “I think you may be right.”

  Krispin relaxed.

  “What is the status of your relationship with Jess?”

  “Nothing more than casual friends, if that.”

  “Mr. Black, I’m not blind. I saw Jess at your warehouse yesterday and then again today with her kayak. And the whole town is buzzing about how you ran over to her place, concerned that something had happened to Jess when Randi went into labor.”

  Krispin bent his head low and collected his thoughts. “Jess came to me yesterday and today. The concern for her welfare is genuine. I do care for her. But as I said, I don’t think it is wise for me to be considering having a relationship. I want to get my life right with the Lord first.” And I’m still not confident that God would allow me to have a wife, he silently added. “Also, I told Jess I’d leave town if it was too uncomfortable having me live here.”

  “I see. Let’s talk about that. If you came here to try and refocus your life, have you done that? I accept your confession in believing in Jesus Christ now, but is that all you needed to accomplish by coming to Squabbin Bay?”

  Krispin had given this a lot of thought. “Mr. Kearns, can I be perfectly honest with you?”

  Wayne nodded.

  Krispin poured out his heart—his fears, his frustrations, the things he’d been learning and reevaluating in his life, everything that had been spinning in his mind for the past year and especially during the three months since the accident.

  “Krispin, you’ve come a long way. I’m happy for you. But you must realize you’re not the only person who’s led the kind of life you did before you got saved. I myself was no gem. God forgives completely. You need to forgive yourself.”

  “Greg said something very similar.”

  “If you like, you can feel free to call me if you’re dealing with any serious temptations.”

  Krispin’s face reddened.

  “It’s Jess, isn’t it?”

  Krispin swallowed. “Yes.”

  “When Dena and I first started to get to know one another, we dealt with some strong emotions waking up in both of us. You should do just fine if you give the matter to the Lord and give it a lot of prayer. He’ll help, trust me. I know from firsthand experience.”

  Krispin felt even more embarrassed, if that were possible. “I don’t know if Jess feels the same way about me. We hardly know one another.”

  “Trust the Lord. If He’s designed the two of you for marriage to one another, then it will happen. If not, He’ll give you the strength to get past your affections for her right now.”

  “How can you be so blunt about this? It’s your daughter we’re speaking about.”

  “It is my daughter, but I learned not too long ago I had to trust her to make the right choice, and so far, she has.

  “Now, tell me about the strip-line kayak you’re building with Greg.”

  And just like that the subject changed. Krispin decided he liked Wayne Kearns and respected him even more.

  ❧

  The following day, Jess sat down at her computer and punched in her password. Something was wrong. She opened her e-mail. It had been downloaded recently. The fine hairs on the back of her neck began to tingle.

  Jess’s hand shook. This computer was tied into the co-op’s computer. S
omeone must have been on her computer. Why? She looked over the various files. She gathered the backup disks from the past three months, then called Randi.

  “Hey, Randi, how are you? How’s the baby?”

  “We’re both doing well. It will take a bit to get used to no sleep, though.”

  “I’ve heard that. Hey, I hate to cut this short, but I’m in a bit of a jam here, and I’m wondering if you can help me out.” Jess went on to explain.

  “First, call the sheriff. Second, call Krispin. He’s an encryption software genius of some sort. He doesn’t know it, but I checked into him. He’s considered an expert in the field.”

  “Really?”

  “Yup, and I’m sure he can tell you how your system was breached and how to fix it.”

  “All right. Do you have his phone number?”

  “Sure, hang on.” Randi was gone from the phone for a moment. “Here ya go.” She gave Jess his home and cell phone numbers.

  “Thanks, Randi.”

  “You’re welcome. I think it’s probably a couple of local kids. But still, you can’t allow anyone to break into your system like that.”

  “Right. I’ll talk with you later. ’Bye.”

  Jess hung up and called the sheriff, then left a message on Krispin’s cell phone to come to the co-op as soon as possible. She headed to the office to check the computers at the co-op.

  She was surprised to see Krispin Black waiting outside the office when she arrived.

  “Hi, Jess. What’s the problem?”

  “Randi says you’re an encryption expert.”

  “I write encryption software. Why?”

  “I think someone broke into my home computer.”

  “Oh boy, any money missing?” Krispin asked.

  “As best as I could tell, no. Can you help?”

  “I can try. First, do you have backup copies?”

  “Right here.” She lifted the small bundle of disks.

  “Good, let’s get to work.” He held the door open and let her pass.

  Jess watched as Krispin fired up the computer. Within minutes, he had a bunch of numerals and digits that didn’t make any sense to her. Jess left him to do his job and went to the desk to sort through the mail.