Amelia's Journey

by Martha Rogers

Andrew extended his hand toward Ben and grinned. “Besides, since we’re going to be brothers, I thought it prudent to be on your good side.”

  Ben laughed and shook the offered hand. “Fine with me, and I look forward to having you as a member of our family.”

  He then left them to say their good-byes and returned to the parlor where Ma continued singing carols, her clear alto voice filling the room with words telling of the Savior’s birth. Ben glanced around the room. With his family gathered together and a roaring fire to keep them warm, Ben experienced a peace and contentment he hadn’t felt since Grandpapa’s illness. No one could know what tomorrow might bring, so this night he savored the moments in this room with loved ones. God had blessed him in wonderful ways this past year, and if all went as planned, more blessings would come in the year ahead.

  Chapter 17

  Amelia waited for Ben to come with Mary Beth and Andrew, her fingers tapping lightly on the lamp table. The fire on the hearth danced and swirled, its red, yellow, and gold flames matching the leaping and twirling of her heart.

  Father had consented to her going out with Ben this afternoon, but the stern lines of his face told of his reluctance to grant the request. He had hesitated then nodded and gave his approval.

  With Grandma and Grandpa present as well as Amanda and Charles, Papa had no choice but to say yes. Amanda had grinned and nodded her approval behind Papa. She and Charles had returned to their own home last night, and now Amelia missed her.

  Grandma came into the parlor with her knitting basket. They were staying another night, and Amelia welcomed her company.

  “I understand from Amanda that you care deeply for Benjamin Haynes.” Grandma sat on the burgundy brocaded sofa and pulled out her knitting needles. Her glasses sat on the tip of her nose, and she peered over them at Amelia.

  “Oh, I do, I do, but Papa is very much against it.” She moved closer to her grandmother. As a child she had loved snuggling in Grandma’s lap and listening to her stories.

  “Yes, and I can understand why. Kansas is a long way from Boston, and he fears the distance will be too hard for your mother to accept.” Grandma twisted yarn around the needles to make the first stitch then began forming the first row.

  “I know, but she should want me to be happy with the man I love. She loves Papa like I love Ben, but I don’t think either one of them is concerned with that. They only want to see me marry one of the young men here, preferably Philip Barlow, and settle down like Amanda and Charles.” Only part of that rang true. Mama and Papa did want her to be happy, but they just believed that happiness could be found right here at home.

  “Yes, your parents love each other and have from the beginning, as have Charles and Amanda, but often love can come later when the couple is evenly matched.” She stopped the clicking needles and once again peered over her glasses at Amelia.

  “My dear, if you have prayed about this, and you still feel Ben is God’s plan for you, nothing will stand in the way of your happiness.” Then she frowned and shook her head. “Unless that son of mine is too stubborn to see what is before his very eyes and insists on having his way.”

  Such an ultimatum from Papa cast a shadow over every meeting she had with Ben. It always lurked in the background and jumped to the forefront when they talked about the future. With so many people understanding her love for Ben, Papa had to come around to seeing it himself. God, please open Papa’s eyes to the love I have for Ben.

  “My dear, I believe I’ll have a little talk with your mother. If she can be persuaded to see how much you care about each other, perhaps she will be able to show your father that your moving away will not be that difficult for her. Of course, I don’t have much time, but I’ll do what I can.”

  Amelia reached over and wrapped her arms around her grandmother’s shoulders. “I’m so glad you’re my grandma. I love you and knew you’d do something to help me.”

  Grandma laughed and picked up her needles. “Between you and Amanda, I don’t have a chance. You girls are so dear to me. Your uncles have given me only grandsons, so you two girls have a special place in my heart.”

  All but the two youngest cousins had married, and one would soon add a great-grandchild to the mix. The boys had been the bane of her existence growing up, and she had longed for just one girl cousin, but now she relished the idea of being one of two girls. With Mama being an only child, the boys were the only cousins she had.

  If she married Ben, she’d be in a larger family with two new sisters and two brothers, as well as all of Ben’s cousins and aunts and uncles. What fun it would to be part of such a family. Then she jumped to the future and the children she and Ben would have. She loved children and wanted at least four or five of her own. The boys would all look like Ben, and the girls would look like her or Mama. The perfect family.

  The butler’s voice broke her daydreaming. “Miss Amelia, Mr. Haynes is here.” He stepped back, and Ben stood in the doorway holding his hat in his hands.

  Amelia jumped up and hurried to him. “I’m so glad you came.” Grandma cleared her throat, and Amelia pulled Ben into the parlor. “Ben, you remember my grandma, Mrs. Carlyle.”

  “It’s been awhile, but yes, I do remember meeting you.” He extended his hand in greeting.

  Grandma grasped his hand in hers. “Yes, it was awhile ago. I’m so sorry that you are here because your grandfather is ill. How is he this day?”

  A grin spread across Ben’s face. “He was with us around the tree yesterday to exchange gifts and is feeling better.”

  “That’s good to hear. Please give my regards to your mother and father and especially to your grandmother. We haven’t had time to visit like we once did.” She gathered up her knitting and stood. “I know you two must be getting along. I’m going upstairs for a bit of a nap before supper.” She kissed Amelia’s cheek. “Have a wonderful afternoon, my dear.”

  When she was gone, Ben offered his arm to Amelia. “Are you ready? Andrew and Mary Beth are already in the carriage.”

  “Oh, my, they must be getting cold. Let me get my coat.” She stepped into the hallway where Murphy held her coat ready. She glanced back to the study and then toward the library, but she found no sign of her parents. That was strange, but perhaps they didn’t know Ben had arrived and that she was leaving with him. Best not to call them in.

  She pushed her arms into the sleeves of the coat Ben now held. “Murphy, will you tell Mama and Papa that I’ll be home before evening?”

  He nodded and handed Amelia her scarf and glove. “I will see that they know, Miss Amelia.”

  “Thank you.” She reached for the hat she’d brought downstairs earlier and set it atop her upswept hair. After securing it with pins, she grinned up at Ben. “I’m all set now.” What a glorious afternoon this would be. Joy overflowed in her heart and down to her feet, and she longed to hop and skip out to the carriage.

  Ben liked seeing Amelia happy, and he wished to see her in the same spirits more often. He helped her into the carriage where she settled into the seat opposite his sister and Andrew.

  Mary Beth leaned forward. “I’m so glad your father allowed you to come with us. We’re going to Andrew’s home for a while, but you and Ben can use the carriage for a ride. The driver knows when to be back for us.”

  Amelia’s mouth dropped open at the revelation, and she turned to face Ben. “Did you know about this?”

  “Not until we were on the way to pick you up. My sister and Andrew wish everyone to be happy like they are.” He’d scolded Mary Beth because of what Mr. Carlyle might say if he learned Amelia had been alone with Ben for the afternoon.

  “We explained to my mother, and she’s such a romantic that she suggested the carriage ride for the two of you, and if your father objects, she’s ready to tell him it was her fault.” Andrew held Mary Beth’s hand tight in his, and his eyes held hers with a gaze that spoke of their love.

  Amelia relaxed against the back of the seat. “That’s amazing. I can’t be
lieve so many people know about Ben and me.”

  Mary Beth grinned and held out her hand. “Well, they do, and someday you’ll have a ring like this to declare that love.”

  Amelia squealed, grasped Mary Beth’s hand, and admired the deep blue sapphire. “It’s gorgeous.”

  Ben sucked in his breath. If Amelia expected something like that from him, he’d have to disappoint her, and that he didn’t want to do. Somehow he’d have to raise the money to buy her something when they could share their love openly without any secrets.

  The carriage stopped, and Andrew stepped down to assist Mary Beth. “Have fun, you two, and we’ll see you back here when it’s time.” He closed the carriage door and tipped his hat to the driver. A few seconds later the carriage once again moved down the road.

  At first neither one spoke, and the clip-clop of the horse’s hooves kept time with the beating of his heart. He moistened his lips and reached for Amelia’s hand. “Why is it that when we’re finally alone, I can never remember the words I want to say? I’m as tongue-tied as a schoolboy caught in mischief in the classroom.”

  “I’m the same way, and there’s so much I want to know about you and the ranch. You know about my life here, but I know very little about yours.”

  That would be a boring subject for her, but he loved to talk about the ranch. “We have quite a few acres of land that are flat prairie, but we also have stands of trees that are actually small forests. We have a creek on the west side and the stream with the mill on the northeast section where most of the trees are.”

  “Oh, yes. You told me about the mill in one of your letters, and that it’s where you want to put a house. I’ve thought about that so often.”

  “I have the plans all set in my mind.” He described what he wanted to build and how. She listened with such interest that he wished the place was ready for them now. If they came for a visit in the spring, he would have part of it built and ready to show her.

  He grasped her hands. “I’ll draw out the plans and send them to you, so you can get an idea of how the house will look. Ma and Pa have promised to invite your parents to come to Kansas next spring, but with Grandpapa’s health so uncertain, they haven’t done anything about it yet.”

  “I can’t wait to get there. Springtime is a lovely time here in Boston with the trees budding out and flowers blooming. What is it like in Kansas?”

  How could he adequately describe the beauty of springtime on the prairie? “It’s a beautiful season with all the wildflowers bursting forth in an expanse of color you have to see to believe. The water in the creek and the stream stay icy cold until late in the season when the sun grows warmer, and then the water is warm and wonderful for wading.”

  “Hmm, I can’t wait to see them, but what about the cattle and the horses?”

  Ben laughed. “Oh, we have plenty of those. We have a lot of horses for our trail drives to cattle market. Extra horses, a remuda, are taken along, so we rest them and alternate which ones we ride and work. Of course, Blackie is my favorite and the one I ride most of the time, but even he needs a rest from the work of riding herd on a drive.”

  The blank expression on her face revealed her lack of knowledge and understanding of what he talked about. “You’ll see and understand once you have an opportunity to visit and ride around with me.”

  “That I look forward to with all my heart. Is your house large enough for us to stay with you, or will we have to stay in a hotel in Sweetwater Springs?”

  “We have room at the house. Gideon, Billy, and I will most likely move out to the bunkhouse so your parents can have our room, and you will occupy Mary Beth’s room. Grace Ann will go in with Clara.” He’d already planned to move to the bunkhouse in the spring anyway, and Gideon and Billy would leap at the chance to be out with the cowboys.

  “Sounds like you have it all planned out.”

  Heat rose in Ben’s cheeks. “As a matter of fact, I happened to overhear Ma and Clara discussing the room arrangements one afternoon. They’re looking forward to your visit too.”

  “If Papa says no at first, I have Grandma and Amanda on my side. Maybe by then Mama will be more in favor of the trip too.”

  Two more allies to plead their case meant a better chance for Amelia and him in the future. Desire to wrap her in his arms and kiss her rose with a warmth that flooded his heart. He released her hands and clenched his hands into fists to fight off the waves of emotion. She furrowed her brow and squinted at him.

  “Did I say something wrong?”

  “No, but what I would like to do now would not be proper or in our best interests.”

  She grinned. “Benjamin Haynes, if you want to kiss me, please do. I can’t stand it another minute.” Amelia placed her hands at the back of his neck.

  He couldn’t resist that temptation, and after all, she’d given her permission. He bent his head toward hers and settled his lips on hers. They tasted as sweet and were as soft as he’d imagined, and her response awakened all his senses. He pressed harder.

  Suddenly the carriage stopped, and Ben jerked back. He moved away from Amelia and glanced out the window. They had returned to the Farnsworths’ home, and Mary Beth stood with Andrew on the porch waiting for them. The couple waved and hurried down the steps.

  Amelia fussed with her skirt, and Ben tugged at his collar. That was close. Mary Beth and Andrew would probably be horrified if they knew, and for certain Mr. Carlyle would string him up like a side of beef. One thing for sure, he’d have to be mighty careful being alone with Amelia in the future.

  Chapter 18

  Amelia sat in her room, her heart breaking for Ben and all the Haynes family. Only a short while ago a messenger had delivered a note saying that the elder Mr. Haynes had passed away peacefully during the night, only three days after Christmas. Ben loved his grandpapa, as had Mary Beth. Both had expressed their gratitude that he had lived to see and enjoy Christmas with all his family present.

  Moisture trickled down the windows like tears matching the ones on Amelia’s cheeks. She stared out at the bleak winter day and shivered. New snow had fallen during the night and now covered the gardens below with a blanket of white. Low-hanging clouds promised more of the same later today. The bitter cold of winter made the death even more difficult to bear.

  Plans made with Mary Beth and Ben for an outing today would not take place, and most likely she wouldn’t see either of them until the funeral unless Mama and Papa decided to pay the family a visit and offer condolences. Since Mama and Mrs. Haynes were such good friends, that would probably happen, and they would take her along because of Mary Beth.

  She strode over to the armoire and searched through her dresses for something suitable to wear. Certainly the red silk dress she now wore would not be appropriate. Amelia pulled out a dark blue wool garment she’d worn when she and Ben went to the bookstore. This would a good choice, especially since it had little adornment. She laid it across the bed in anticipation of Mama coming to tell her they were going to visit the Haynes’s home.

  The noon meal had been solemn with Mama and Papa discussing the merits of the late Mr. Haynes. Papa admired his business acumen and his strong Christian faith. He’d been an elder at their church for many years and had served on various committees. The church would miss him, but they would find someone to replace him. Not so with the family. Grandpapa Haynes had been a powerful influence, and the success of his three sons proved his faithful attention to their needs.

  She plopped back in her chair and gazed about her room. When she and Mama had redone it two years ago, the yellow and lavender floral wallpaper had been her first choice, and she still loved it. It gave her room the feel of sunshine and flowers all year round. The white painted furniture had been a little too feminine for her taste, but after it had been put in place, she had grown to love it.

  What would it be like to live in Kansas? What kind of home would Ben have for them? Questions swayed and tossed like tree limbs in a summer storm. She’d miss
this room and the luxuries she had, but her spirit of adventure called to her and told her she’d love the Midwest. For that matter, she’d love anywhere Ben took her to live.

  As a rancher’s wife she’d have many different things to do that she didn’t do now. She sat up straight in her chair. One of those would be cooking, and what she knew about cooking wouldn’t fill the head of a dressmaker’s pin. Amelia chewed her lip. One thing she’d never considered until this minute was what she’d be expected to do as Ben’s wife. She’d been so caught up in romance, she had lost sight of reality.

  Ben had an appetite and talked about what a great cook his ma was. How could she live up to that? Only one thing to do—she had to learn to cook now so she wouldn’t disappoint him later. Lettie would help her, and Mary Beth could tell her other things she needed to learn.

  She scampered down the stairway, being careful not to make noise and arouse her parents, who had retired to their own room after the noon meal. Papa always took off from his work the week of Christmas, so having him home on a weekday was unusual but rather nice. Would Ben be home during the day or out on the range all the time? No matter, he still had to eat when he came home, and she wanted to feed him good, hearty meals.

  Amelia followed the wonderful aromas emanating from the kitchen and found Lettie stirring something that smelled delicious. She glanced up at Amelia. “Mercy, child, what are you doing down here at this time of day? Supper won’t be ready for several hours.”

  “It just occurred to me that I don’t know a thing about cooking, and I’ve decided I want to learn.” Lettie would think that curious since there was no need for Amelia to know anything about cooking. She’d have to come up with a good excuse. Why hadn’t she thought of that before approaching Lettie?

  “Now that’s an odd request if ever I heard one. What makes ye want to cook, child? Isn’t my cooking good enough for you?”

  “Oh, yes, Lettie. It’s wonderful, and that’s why I wanted to learn from you.”