Amelia's Journey

by Martha Rogers

Amanda was bleeding? Had there been an accident? “Mama and Papa are at the Farnsworths for dinner. Let me get my coat and I’ll come with you.”

  She snatched her cloak from the hall tree and ran after Charles, who had returned to the carriage. Amelia climbed inside then clapped her hand over her mouth. Amanda’s skirt was covered with blood, and the stench almost overpowered her.

  The coach began moving, and Amelia lurched forward. She caught herself and knelt on the floor beside her sister. “Amanda, what happened? Why are you bleeding?”

  Amanda reached out to grasp Amelia’s hand with hers as Charles held tight to the other one. Her face grimaced in pain, and she bit her lip.

  Charles moaned and buried his face on Amanda’s arm. “I don’t know what to do. Please help her.”

  Something was terribly wrong here. Amelia gagged once again, but reached up to smooth her sister’s hair from her face. “What is it? Tell me what happened.”

  Amanda gasped for breath as the carriage swayed and bumped along the streets. “I’m pregnant, but I started cramping really bad a little while ago, and then I suddenly started bleeding all over the place.” She moaned again and lolled her head back against the seat cushion.

  Her sister was pregnant? But why was she bleeding? Amelia swallowed the fear clogging her throat. What was she supposed to do? She didn’t know anything about babies or pregnant women.

  Then the carriage stopped and the door flew open. The driver reached inside for Charles. “We’re at the hospital, Mr. Bishop. Let me help you get her inside.”

  Amanda sobbed and grabbed Amelia’s blouse. “Don’t leave me, please.”

  “I won’t. I promise.” She released Amanda’s hand and waited until Charles and the driver carried her inside. Then she scampered down from the carriage and followed them into the hospital. Nurses immediately took charge, telling Charles he had to wait outside the room while they tended to her.

  Amelia stood in the doorway but back from the doctor and nurses. The odor of antiseptics, ether, and alcohol assaulted her nose. It wasn’t much better, but at least it didn’t gag her like the blood had. “I’m here, Amanda. I won’t leave you. You’ll be all right now.” Please, God, she had to be all right.

  “Amelia, where is she?”

  To her surprise and relief Mama raced down the hallway toward her. Amelia opened her arms and fell against her mother. “She’s bleeding something awful. She said something about being pregnant, but this isn’t supposed to happen, is it?”

  “No, it isn’t. It’s the Harrelson curse.” She held Amelia for a minute or so then let her go to peer into the room. Satisfied the doctors were doing their job, she turned back to Amelia. “She’ll be all right, sweetie. This happened to me twice.”

  Amelia shook her head. What did her mother mean by that? She bowed her head. Thank You, Lord, and I’m sure glad You sent Mama along. She jerked her head up. “Mama, how did you know, and how did you get here?”

  “Charles’s butler rushed over to the Farnsworth house to find Mr. and Mrs. Bishop. He didn’t know we’d be there too. He told us Amanda was hurt and Charles was taking her to the hospital. We all came. His parents and Papa are with Charles now.”

  “But what is happening? I don’t understand.”

  Mama reached up and stroked her cheek. “There’s so much you don’t know, and it’s time you were told all the complications of marriage.” She glanced into the room once again.

  The doctor strode out. “We’re taking her up to surgery. We have to make sure all tissue is gone. She’s been sedated, so you’ll have to wait to talk with her.”

  Mama nodded, but worry and fear lined her face. “I understand. I’ve been through it.”

  Amelia grasped her mother’s hand, and they stepped back to let the nurses bring Amanda out and take her to surgery. Amanda’s face was as white as the sheet covering her, and her eyes were closed and her face relaxed. Amelia’s heart thumped wildly. Her sister looked barely alive. When she disappeared around the corner, Amelia turned to her mother. “Now, please tell me what is going on.”

  Mama moistened her lips. “Amanda told me Christmas Day that she believed she was pregnant. I was so worried, but I didn’t say anything to her. Pregnancies have always been hard for the Harrelson women, but I thought maybe Amanda would escape the problem. She hasn’t, and now she’s miscarried the baby and has lost it.”

  Amelia sucked in her breath and leaned against the wall. Her legs threatened to fold on her, but she forced herself to stay upright. Her sister was…had been pregnant, and now the baby had died. Tears forced their way to the surface and trickled down her cheeks. Amanda loved children and would be a wonderful mother. How could this have happened? Would it happen to her?

  Her mother grasped Amelia around the shoulders and led her back to the waiting room. She glanced up through the blur of tears, and a familiar figure loomed in front of her. Ben? How did he get here? When he wrapped his arms around her, she didn’t care. All that mattered was the fact he was here and held her in his strong arms.

  Chapter 20

  Amelia stepped back from Ben and swiped at her cheeks with her fingers. “I’m so glad you came, but how did you know?”

  “Mary Beth and Andrew arrived at his home just as your parents were leaving. Mrs. Farnsworth told us that Charles was taking Amanda to the hospital. They stopped at our house and picked me up. Mary Beth knew I’d want to be here with you.”

  Relief flooded through Amelia like a wave of fresh spring water. Amanda had Charles and Mama, Mama had Papa to comfort her, and Ben had come for her. “I’m so thankful you did. I needed someone to cry on.”

  He wrapped his arms around her again. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

  She didn’t care if Papa did see them. She needed Ben’s presence and his arms more than she needed anything else. Papa could scold her later, but right now contentment and peace filled her.

  “Tell me what happened to Amanda. Did she have an accident?”

  Amelia pressed her cheek against his chest, the beating of his heart almost in complete tune with hers. “She was expecting a baby and something went wrong. They took her to surgery. Oh, Ben, she lost the baby.” Fresh tears flowed for a tiny life now gone from this earth.

  “I’m so sorry. Is Amanda going to be all right?” He rubbed the palms of his hands across her shoulders and back.

  Amelia’s sobs slowed, and she backed away, wiping her eyes. “Yes. The doctor says she’ll be fine physically, but it’s going to take a while for her to get over this emotionally.” Here she stood talking with Ben about pregnancies and babies and miscarriages, all delicate female matters, but no embarrassment or timidity kept her from sharing. Instead, peace and comfort from the man she loved bolstered her hopes that everything would be all right.

  They said nothing for a minute or two, and then he led her to the area where the rest of the family waited. No one spoke, but Mary Beth came over and hugged Amelia. Mama peered at her with a strange look in her eyes that didn’t speak of anger but of puzzlement. However, Papa’s scowl left no doubts as to his mood. She’d just have to deal with that later.

  Ben sat beside Amelia holding her hand, and Mary Beth sat on the other with Andrew beside her. So much sorrow in the past week, but so much love seen as friends comforted one another. That was one thing Amelia loved about being a Christian. When bad things happened, Christian friends were immediately present to offer help.

  She peered up at Ben. His love flowed from his heart to his eyes and then through the hands that held hers. “How do people who aren’t Christians make it through times like this week? Without the assurance that your Grandpapa is now in heaven with his Lord, and that God had a reason for taking this baby too soon, I couldn’t bear the loss.”

  “I don’t know. So many things we don’t understand about how God works in our lives, but we have to believe that His plans are best.”

  They sat without talking. The rustle of skirts and the footsteps of doctors and
others going about hospital business were the only sounds to break the silence. Mama’s head rested on Papa’s shoulder, and her eyes were closed. Mary Beth and Andrew stayed lending their support. Charles paced up and down the hall raking his hands through his hair. His parents sat nearby holding hands.

  Ben squeezed Amelia’s hand, and his strength ran up her arm to her heart. They would get through this and Amanda would have other babies in the future.

  Charles stopped his pacing and hurried down the hall. Mama jumped up, then Papa. The doctor appeared with Charles at his side. Amelia stood, and Ben was right beside her. The doctor then smiled. “She’s going to be fine. She’s still sleeping off the anesthetic, but everything went as planned. She was approximately eight weeks into the pregnancy, and if this had to happen, it’s better to be now than weeks later.”

  The doctor gripped Charles’s shoulder. “It’s a good thing you brought her here instead of trying to get a doctor to your home. We couldn’t have treated her as completely at home, and the blood loss would have been much more severe. She would have been brought here for the surgery anyway, so you used good judgment, young man.” Then he smiled gently. “You may go sit with your wife now. The rest of you will have to wait. Come with me, Mr. Bishop.” The two men disappeared down the hall.

  Mama slumped against Papa, her pale face pressed into his chest. His cheek rested on her head as he wrapped his arms around her. “She’ll be all right, Lenora. Our girl will be all right.”

  Amelia leaned against Ben for support. For the first time she noticed the blood on her skirt. The enormity of the situation now hit her full force, and her legs threatened to crumple beneath her. Ben held her steady, and once again his strength sustained her.

  Mary Beth pulled her cloak about her. “Andrew and I will be leaving. I know Ma and Clara will want to know what has happened.” She looked up at her brother. “Do you want to go with us, or stay?”

  Ben’s hand tightened on Amelia’s arm. “I want to stay if it’s all right with Mr. and Mrs. Carlyle.”

  Amelia smiled up at Ben. He had been her tower of strength tonight. “It will be. We can drop you off at your grandmother’s house on the way home. I just don’t know how much longer they will want to stay.”

  “However long it takes, I’ll be right here by your side.” To Mary Beth he said, “Tell Ma I’ll be home when the Carlyles bring me.”

  The couple bade them good-bye and left the waiting area along with Charles’s parents. Amelia and Ben returned to their chairs where she collapsed and breathed deeply. Mama sat down beside her. “I’m so glad you were able to come with them. I know Amanda appreciated your being there. I’m so sorry you had to see all that, but you need to know about things like this.”

  Tears threatened again, and Amelia swallowed hard before responding. “Mama, it was terrible. There was so much blood everywhere.” She glanced down at her skirt and grimaced. “I’ll never get that picture out of my mind.”

  Mama patted her hand. “You will in time, you will.” She tilted her head toward Ben. “I’m glad you are here for Amelia. She needed a strong shoulder to lean on, and I couldn’t provide it tonight. To be honest, before I got to know you, I thought you might be a mule-headed, cow-loving dust buster, but I’ve seen that you are a sensitive, caring young man, and I appreciate your presence here tonight.”

  Amelia’s heart swelled with pride in Ben. To have her mother speak as she did gave hope that the problems with her father could somehow be worked out. God was putting it all in motion, and it would be exciting to see where He planned to lead them.

  A nurse appeared and spoke to Mama and Papa. “She’s awake now and wants to see you. I’ll take you to her room.”

  Mama grabbed Amelia’s hand and started down the hall with Papa following close behind. When she glanced back at Ben, he waved and returned to his seat.

  Ben slumped down into the chair. He pulled out his pocket watch and checked the time. The hands pointed to a little after midnight. A new year had begun, and none of them had even noticed, but then their minds had been elsewhere the past four hours or so. He wondered for a moment what the year 1877 would bring.

  Amelia hadn’t mentioned the house plans, but when had she had time? She may not have even looked at them yet, but in the hours since church this morning, she must have had some opportunity to do so.

  Although he had wanted to stay for Amelia, he now questioned that decision. He did want to be with her, but the frowns and scowls from her father didn’t indicate any acceptance of Ben on Mr. Carlyle’s part. What could he say to the man to help him understand how much he loved Amelia?

  His head nodded, and his eyes wanted to close. In that state he saw Amelia in the house he would build. She hung clothes on the line, and a child ran through the sheets flapping in the wind. A basket beside her held a baby sitting up and clapping its hands at the antics of the other child. His chin flopped to his chest, and Bed sat up with a jerk. He blinked his eyes rapidly to ward off sleepiness.

  He stood up and shook his head and shoulders. A noise from down the hall caused him to turn around. Amelia and her parents hurried toward him. From the joy in their faces, they must have good news.

  Amelia reached him first. “Amanda’s sleeping peacefully now. The doctor said Charles could stay with her tonight, and she can go home Tuesday. Isn’t that wonderful?”

  “Yes, it is. Are you going to stay?”

  Mr. Carlyle shook his head. “No, it’s time for us to go home and get some sleep. It’s well after one, and we will want to come back in the morning.”

  Mrs. Carlyle’s eyes opened wide as though she’d just thought of something. Amelia gasped. “Oh my, it’s New Year’s Day, and we missed the coming of the new year.”

  Her mother patted Amelia’s arm. “That we did, but it doesn’t matter now. Amanda is all right, so we can go home.” She glanced at Ben. “I take it you’re going with us?”

  “Yes, ma’am, if it’s not too inconvenient.” Ben swallowed hard. What if Mr. Carlyle objected? It was a long walk in the cold to his grandmother’s house, and he didn’t relish the idea of doing it in the middle of the night.

  Mr. Carlyle retrieved his coat and handed his wife’s coat to her. “I think it’s the least we can do for your coming and staying so long. We’ve been up this long, so another fifteen minutes or so won’t hurt us.” He pushed his arms into the sleeves of his coat then picked up his hat. “I’ll go find Toby and the carriage. Meet me out front.”

  With that he hurried down the hall toward the main entrance. Ben helped Mrs. Carlyle with her coat while Amelia tied her cloak around her neck. He escorted the two ladies out to the street just as Toby drove up with the carriage. Mr. Carlyle assisted his wife and Ben lifted Amelia up.

  Once they were settled, the carriage began to move, its wheels rattling on the cobblestone streets, disturbing the quiet of the early morning hour. No one said anything, and Ben’s mouth became dry as a parched prairie in a drought. He tried to moisten his lips but couldn’t even raise enough spit for that. Only his hands were damp as if he’d just washed them.

  Mr. Carlyle leaned forward in his seat a bit as the carriage swayed and turned a corner. “Your father tells me that he’s making you a partner in the ranch when you turn twenty this year.”

  Ben’s heart jumped, but his muddled brain righted itself in order to answer. “That’s right, sir. I’ll get my share just like Gideon and Billy will when their time comes.” Ben rubbed his palms against his thighs and wished for a sip of water.

  “I see, and how do you like ranching?”

  Mr. Carlyle studied Ben as though he was a specimen in a science lab. He sent a prayer asking for guidance as to what to answer. “I thoroughly enjoy working with my father. Being out on the wide open range gives me the opportunity to see all of God’s work in nature.”

  “Isn’t that dangerous work? I mean, being around so many cows and the danger of a stampede.”

  “We don’t have many stampedes. In
fact, I don’t recall but one since I started working with the herds.” The one he did remember was one of the worst things he’d seen in his life. The thundering hooves and the dust that blinded him so he couldn’t see anything created a lasting memory. Thankfully his horse had known just what to do and kept Ben from being injured.

  “I still say it’s dangerous work. How far are you from the town…Sweetwater Springs, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, sir. It takes us about half an hour to reach church on Sunday mornings. We live on the side of the ranch closest to town.” Why was he asking so many questions? Surely he and Pa had discussed the ranch more than once in their time together. If he was trying to catch Ben unawares and saying something wrong, he’d sure picked a strange time to do it.

  “Have you considered coming back here and working with your uncles in carrying on your grandfather’s business?”

  Ben gulped. Come back to Boston? That had never entered his mind. “No, sir, I have a number of responsibilities on the ranch, and I want to help Pa.”

  “I see.” He said nothing for a moment then narrowed his eyes as though he’d made a decision. “Your parents have told us a great deal about the ranch and, as a matter of fact, have invited us to come for a visit in April.”

  Amelia stiffened beside him, and her arm brushed against his. Both of them had hoped this would happen but had heard no discussion of it. Pa had been busier than he thought, or maybe it had been Ma. Whoever had done the asking didn’t matter, but what Mr. Carlyle planned to do did.

  “That’s a wonderful idea, Papa. May we go?” Amelia tried to keep the excitement from her voice, but it didn’t fool her father.

  “Well, your mother and I will have to discuss it. We don’t know how Amanda will fare in the coming weeks, so we’ll wait and see.”

  Not very encouraging, but at least he hadn’t dismissed the idea completely. That gave Ben hope that a visit would be forthcoming.

  The carriage stopped, and Ben stepped down. “I appreciate the ride home, Mr. and Mrs. Carlyle. I pray Amanda will be better soon and able to go home.”