Amelia's Journey

by Martha Rogers

  As though reading her thoughts, Mrs. Haynes patted her shoulder. “Don’t worry about it any. It was like that for me when I first started learning. All you need to do is practice.”

  Mama hugged her. “If you really want to learn, Lettie will be the best teacher when we get back home. I’m sure Elizabeth has a good number of recipes for you to take back.”

  Amelia’s heart raced. Mama was actually approving of this. Did that mean Pa might begin to soften too?

  At dinner that night, Ben was pleased when Mr. Carlyle talked approvingly about his day on the ranch. “I had no idea so much was involved in running a ranch like this. Seeing all those cattle made me realize how fortunate we are when we serve beef on our table at home.”

  Pa laid his napkin beside his plate. “We do have a surprise in store for you. We have branding next week, and we’re planning on taking all of you out to see it.”

  Mrs. Carlyle shook her head. “I don’t believe I’ll go, if it’s all right. I don’t like being out in the sun very long.”

  Ma smiled with sympathy filling her eyes. “I understand, Lenora. I didn’t like that much sun in the beginning myself.”

  The rest agreed they would like to participate. Ben imagined the look that would be on the faces of Amelia and Mr. Carlyle as they watched. Branding was a hot, dusty, smelly operation, and the calves bawled when the hot iron hit their flesh. But if Amelia wanted to know what ranch life was all about, she had to be at the branding. Ma would be there, and Clara would too if not for her teaching.

  Ma gazed around the table. “I hope you all loved the meal because Amelia helped me prepare it.”

  Ben’s mouth dropped open, and Amelia bowed her head, her cheeks stained with red. She didn’t know how to cook, or least she’d said she didn’t. He noted the sparkle in Ma’s eye; she must have been teaching Amelia today. “It was an exceptional meal. Thank you, Amelia.” She glanced up at him and swallowed hard. An odd reaction to a compliment, but he dismissed it.

  Clara and Grace Ann cleaned up from supper to allow Lenora time to visit with Elizabeth. The men were in Matthew’s office. Lenora and Elizabeth sat in the parlor while Benjamin and Gideon entertained Billy and Amelia elsewhere.

  “Thank you for not mentioning Amelia’s cooking disaster,” Lenora said. “She was embarrassed enough when it happened.”

  “Oh, I had plenty of mistakes of my own that nobody knew about. A lot of things got thrown away that no one ever saw. If she truly wants to learn, she’ll catch on quickly.”

  Lenora gazed around at the furnishings of the house. The wood and fabric of the chairs and sofa blended well with that of the tables. Matching curtains adorned the windows and added to the homey feeling. “You’ve done a wonderful job of decorating. The house is quite nice and so comfortable.”

  “We’ve been here long enough for it to be the way I want it, and Clara has been a big help.”

  Lenora bit her lip, not sure where to go next in the conversation she wanted to have about Benjamin and Amelia. Finally she decided to plunge ahead. “Elizabeth, you know the problems I had in childbirth, and now Amanda is facing them. I’m afraid it will be Amelia’s lot also. I’m concerned with how that might affect any relationship Ben and Amelia may have.” No “may” about it; they were in a relationship, and anyone knowing them would be very much aware of it.

  “Yes, I remember, but Isaac loved you and worried about you those times. Charles will do the same for Amanda, and knowing my Ben, he will be just as concerned about Amelia. Losing the babies was hard on Isaac and Charles, but their love remained steadfast. If Amelia can give Ben only one child, he’ll be happy with that.”

  Isaac had said more than once that having the two girls was blessing enough for him, but often Lenora wondered if he missed not having a son, especially since one had come and then been taken away before he could live. Would that happen to Amelia? She didn’t want that kind of hurt for her daughter.

  Lenora shook her head and blinked her eyes. “Here we are talking like a wedding is already planned when her father is still against such a union. Now that I’ve been out here and seen your life, I realize Amelia would be happy on the ranch. I’d miss her so much, and so would Amanda, but I don’t think either one of us would begrudge her if she’s found her one true love. Still, I’m not sure I want her to leave us.”

  “Matthew and I have had our doubts about the relationship as well, but Ben seems so confident that God is working it all out. I would love to have Amelia as part of our family. It would strengthen the bond our families already have.”

  Amelia would be happy with Elizabeth and Clara here to guide her, but she’d be so far away from home. “It looks like I’m going to have to do quite a bit more praying about this matter. If my heart isn’t willing to change right now, then perhaps I should pray for God to make me willing to be willing. Does that make sense?”

  Elizabeth hugged Lenora. “Perfect sense to me. I had to pray that same thing when making the decision about letting Mary Beth stay in Boston.”

  Lenora sat back with a slump against the back of the couch. “I hadn’t even thought of that. Here I am going on and on about Amelia when you’ve already made the decision and let Mary Beth find her happiness in Boston. She’s as far from you as Amelia would be from me.” How thoughtless to pity herself when her friend had already walked that path and accepted her daughter’s choice.

  Perhaps it was time to think of Amelia and not of selfish desires for Isaac and herself.

  Chapter 27

  The day of the branding arrived, only two days before they were to leave. Where had the time gone? She and Ben had had some time alone over the last twelve days, but not nearly enough to suit her. He was busy with his duties on the ranch, and she was kept occupied with Mrs. Haynes and Mama as they visited friends of the Haynes family on other ranches. Everything Amelia had seen she liked so far, but today would be a real test.

  After a final check of her boots and riding attire, Amelia made her way downstairs to meet Mrs. Haynes. They headed for the corral where Ben waited with the horses.

  Once again Ben gave her a boost up into the saddle on Victory. He grinned up at her, his brown eyes serious. “Are you sure you want to do this today? It can be brutal if you’ve never seen it before.”

  From the descriptions she’d heard, she didn’t doubt it, but she wanted to know everything about running a ranch. “No, I’ll be fine.” The stiffness and aches in her legs and back had given way to occasional aches and pains, but she enjoyed being on a horse.

  When they reached the area for the branding, a fire blazed and several long-handled irons with the Rocking H brand lay heating in the flames. Three cowboys along with Ben culled out the calves and then proceeded to rope each one individually.

  Steve looped a rope around a calf’s neck and pulled it tight. Then he jumped from his horse and had the legs tied in just seconds. Amelia’s mouth dropped open. How had he done that so fast? The calf lay bawling on its side, and another cowboy approached with a branding iron. When the stench of burning hair and flesh filled the air, Amelia winced then screwed up her nose and covered it with her hand.

  How awful for that poor calf to have that red-hot iron pressed into his hip, and that smell was bad enough to make a person sick. Indeed her stomach had begun rolling, and she swallowed to stop the waves of nausea.

  She glanced over and found Ben watching her with narrowed eyes. Her shoulders straightened and she held her head high. Pa rode up to her.

  “Are you all right, Amelia? This isn’t a pretty sight, and I’m glad your mother stayed away. Perhaps you should join her. This is no place for a lady of refinement.”

  She waved him away. “No, Papa, I’m fine. But when the iron hit the second calf, Amelia’s insides rebelled completely. She jumped from her own horse and promptly emptied her stomach of its breakfast. Ben immediately ran to her side.

  He wrapped his arms around her and patted her back. “It’s OK. The smell is pretty bad, so you ne
edn’t feel bad. It happens to the best of us.”

  Heat filled her cheeks, and she lifted tear-filled eyes to his. “I’m so sorry. I just couldn’t stop it from coming.”

  “Would you rather go back to the house now?”

  She wanted to be brave and stay, but her stomach wouldn’t obey. “Do you ever get used to it?”

  “After a time we don’t notice it so much, but it still has an odor hard to ignore. Come on, I’ll get Ma to ride back with you.”

  He helped her back onto her horse and turned to his mother. “Ma, Amelia’s not feeling well. Will you accompany her back to the house?”

  Papa rode up beside her. “That won’t be necessary. I’ll take my daughter back. I’ve seen all I need to see, and I want to check on Mrs. Carlyle anyway.”

  As they rode away another calf bawled its objections, and Amelia held her breath so as not to catch the whiff of the branding. When they rode out of earshot, Papa put one hand on his hip and sent a glare her way.

  “Are you satisfied now that ranching is not the kind of life for you?”

  “I admit it is a hard life, but I love the wide open spaces, and I can ride a horse now without hanging on for dear life. It’s really not bad.”

  “How can you say that after all you’ve seen and done the past two weeks? Mrs. Haynes has to do all her own cooking, with Clara’s help, but still she does it, and she has to take care of all the chores around the house to keep it clean and tidy. You’re not prepared for that kind of life.”

  His harsh tone did nothing to convince Amelia that she wouldn’t like living on a ranch. “I can learn to do all those things. Mrs. Haynes has been teaching me.” It was best to keep quiet about already asking Lettie to teach her the basics of cooking. That might send Papa over the edge.

  “Dabbling in cooking is one thing; having to cook day after day is another. You were not raised to live this kind of life. Your mother and I have worked too hard to give you the things that will make life easier for you. I believe you are better suited to a life in Boston.”

  Amelia bit her tongue to keep from a retort that would anger her father. How could he be so blind as not to see the love she and Ben had for each other? Theirs was the kind of love that could endure the hardships of living on a ranch. And he had even managed to convince her that the number of children they had, if any, didn’t make a difference in his love.

  The clatter of horse’s shoes pounded the hard-packed earth behind them. Then Mrs. Haynes rode up and pulled in her reins. “Matthew reminded me that with all the rest of us eating at the chuck wagon back there, you would need to have someone to get your noon meal. I’m going with you to prepare something so you won’t have to worry about it.”

  Papa nodded and smiled at Mrs. Haynes. “That’s very nice of you, Elizabeth. I’m sure Lenora will appreciate it.”

  Amelia hadn’t given any thought to food, and the way her stomach still felt, she didn’t want anything right now. She appreciated Mrs. Haynes’s thoughtfulness, but she could probably have found something for them to eat. “I’m sorry you had to leave the group, and I’m sorry I made a spectacle of myself back there.”

  Mrs. Haynes laughed. “Don’t worry about that. I did exactly the same when I first came out here. Clara did too, as well as Mary Beth. We let Grace Ann go last year, and she cried the whole time for the calves. It’s all a part of living on a ranch.”

  Papa commented, “You and Matthew have done quite well for yourselves. He said the herd had a good number of calves this year.”

  “That’s right. He’s selected several of the best ones to give to Ben for his own stock. Ben has a piece of land that’s his now, and he’s going to begin building his own herd through the summer. Matthew is very proud of him.”

  “I see.” Papa cut a glance her way, a hard glitter in his eyes. “That will take a while, I presume.”

  “Yes, but he’s smart and has a keen mind for business and loves ranching, so he’ll be as successful as Matthew has been. It wouldn’t surprise me any to see him go on beyond what we have done.”

  Amelia’s heart swelled with pride at Mrs. Haynes’s confidence in Ben. With the plans he had already shared with her, Amelia saw Ben as a prominent man in the ranching business someday. Too bad Papa couldn’t see the same success for Ben. If that didn’t convince him, then she had little hope of being Ben’s bride anytime in the near future.

  Ben’s concern for Amelia grew as the day wore on. Would the sight she’d witnessed this morning turn her off to ranching? He could reassure her that she wouldn’t have to take part in such activities, but would it be enough?

  After the last calf had the Rocking H brand on his backside, the ranch hands doused the fire and made preparations to head back to the bunkhouse. He helped the cook load up the chuck wagon and put away supplies. Then he glanced up at the skies, and a frown creased his brow.

  What had been a good cloud cover from the sun for their work now loomed dark and gray overhead. He spotted lightning in the distance and detected the scent of rain in the air. They sorely needed the moisture, but he would rather it wait until they were at least undercover. He hated riding Blackie in heavy rain, even if he wore his slicker.

  Pa mounted his horse. “Let’s get going, boys. That rain won’t wait on us.”

  Ben swung up on Blackie just as a hard gust of wind hit him and threatened to take his hat. He secured it then reached for the oil skin coat behind his saddle. Even if it was rarely needed, none of them left the ranch without protection from the elements.

  Dust swirled about the horses, and the grasses swayed in the wind. At least they were headed in the same direction as the wind and not into it. That made riding somewhat easier, but the thunder now roared more quickly after the lightning strikes to indicate it had drawn closer.

  Pa picked up the pace to a near gallop, and they reached the bunkhouse just as the first large drops of rain splattered the ground. They led the horses into the stables and quickly unsaddled them. After being out all day, they needed tending, and Pa never neglected his horses.

  Half an hour later, the men made a run for their shelter, and he and Pa ran for the house. Cook had managed to get the chuck wagon into the barn, and Ben spotted him scurrying for cover too.

  The rain fell harder and soaked Ben to the skin by the time he reached the front porch with Pa. A chill wind accompanied the downpour and sent shivers through Ben. He and Pa tramped into the house, their clothes dripping on the floor.

  Clara hurried toward them. “You boys best get out of those clothes right away then get back here by the warm fire.” She grabbed their hats to dry them and shooed them out of the room. At least she and the children had made it home before the deluge.

  While Ben toweled dry and donned fresh clothes, the wind began a howling that rattled the window panes. The clouds hadn’t looked like ones that might produce a tornado, but out here, they couldn’t be too careful. If things grew bad enough, Pa would move them all to the storm shelter to wait it out.

  Here it was the last few days for Amelia and her parents, and a storm had to come. He prayed it held only thunder and lightning and no twisting winds that could destroy everything in their path. He’d been through one of those once before and didn’t like the idea of doing it again.

  Ben ambled downstairs and joined the others in the parlor. Billy played with blocks near the fireplace, and Grace Ann had curled up in a chair with a book. Mr. and Mrs. Carlyle sat on one side talking with Pa. Amelia spotted him and rushed to his side.

  Her eyes opened wide, and her face had grown pale. “The storm sounds horrible. Will we be safe here?”

  He held her hands. “Yes, if it gets worse, we will all go down into the storm cellar. It’s out beside the house.” If only he could take the fear out of her face, but he had no idea how much worse the storm might become.

  Mama appeared, wiping her hands on a dish towel. “Supper’s ready. This storm isn’t letting up, so we may as well eat.”

  Everyone gat
hered around the table, and Pa offered a prayer for safety during the storm. They ate mostly without conversation as the wind howled and the house groaned. Papa had built it strong and sturdy, and it would survive a thunderstorm, but he wasn’t too sure about Mrs. Carlyle. The pinched appearance of her face spoke not only of her fear but also of the lingering headache she’d complained about earlier.

  At the end of the meal Mr. Carlyle laid his napkin on the table. “Matthew, Ben, may I speak privately with the two of you?”

  Ben stiffened and glanced at Amelia, who stared back wide-eyed. He shoved back from the table and followed his father and Mr. Carlyle into his father’s office.

  Once the door closed, Mr. Carlyle stood with his hands behind his back and glared at Ben. “I know my daughter cares about you, and you appear to care a great deal about her. I take it you want her to come out here to live?”

  Ben swallowed hard. Bracing himself for the refusal, he said, “Yes, sir, I would like to marry your daughter.”

  “I expected so, but let me ask you something. Since you expect my daughter to give up all she has known in life to come out here, and she appears to love you enough to be willing to do that, do you love her enough to give up what you have here and move back to Boston to find work there as her husband?”

  Ben’s heart lurched in his chest. Give up ranching to take a position somewhere in Boston? “I don’t know. I hadn’t even considered it.” The thought had crossed his mind, but he’d shoved it away and gone ahead with his own plans.

  “Don’t you think that’s rather selfish? You expect her to give up everything for you, but you haven’t considered giving up everything for her.” He turned and grasped the door knob. “Think about it, young man. There are two sides to every dilemma.” He strode from the office, closing the door behind him.

  Ben stood speechless beside his father for a moment then turned to him. “What in the world would I do in Boston? All I know is ranching.”