Path of Thieves

by Sunniva Dee

  “Second question: are you ticklish?”

  “No!” Her voice rises uncontrollably.

  I go easy on her, but I don’t stop altogether. She squirms against me, which is arousing too. “Let me go!”

  “Third question: why didn’t you tell me you had asthma and that I should make sure you always carry your inhaler?”

  “I do carry it,” she pants out, tugging an arm out of my hold.

  “Only to the car. We’ve been seeing each other for months. Shouldn’t I know these things by now?” I drop my hands to my sides and examine her in the semidarkness. She’s warm, hair unruly from the beach and our kisses. The sight makes me feel strange on the inside.

  Nadine leans back into the seat and turns to me. Her chest rises and sinks with exertion, causing a sting of guilt to hit me. This time, it’s definitely my fault. I shouldn’t have tickled her.

  The inhaler looks forgotten on the mid console, like it’s some random object and not a lifesaver. I squeeze it in my hand before I proffer it to her. For a second, she looks like she wants to say no, but then she changes her mind and does what I ask.

  One deep breath. She starts to laugh on the outbreath, and I realize that I’ve helped by filling my own lungs.

  “Weirdo. Please don’t get all overprotective on me now, okay?”

  “Well, if you don’t—”

  “Have you seen me get sick before?”

  “No, but…”

  “Right, so trust me then. My parents took forever to believe that I can take care of myself. Now they finally do, and the last thing I need is for you to start down the same path.”

  I flex my foot against the gas pedal, alleviating the stress that needles my calf. “Is that why you didn’t tell me, because you were afraid I’d stalk you with a haggle of inhalers?”

  She sits up, leans over the mid console until our faces touch. I close my eyes, feeling the tip of her nose run slowly along the ridge of mine. Warm air expels from her nostrils. It hits my skin and gives me goosebumps.

  “No. I didn’t tell you because my issues are trivial compared to yours.”

  We’re on the football field, and the bleachers are filled with family and friends in their finest getups. On a bench at midfield sit Nadine, my father, and Step-Cynth. I looked away from Step-Cynth this morning, half dressed as she was in some new pink outfit with thin straps that kept falling off the shoulders. Now she’s decent. At least the top half of her. The bottom half shows a lot of thigh and heels that say… Never mind.

  Nadine’s graduation was last weekend. She was third in her class, and her parents think she should study medicine. My girl doesn’t agree. She knows what she wants, she says. She might “go the midwife route” when the time is right too, supposedly. When is the time right for that stuff?

  I try to concentrate when the principal talks. Her voice booms through the microphone, a slight feedback twisting her words. Bear slouches at my side with Liza’s hand in his. She’s crying. Hasn’t stopped since we came here much too early this morning.

  Liza’s plans are to follow her boyfriend, who’s been signed to the Gators for a long time now. She’ll study whatever, she tells us. “Undecided,” her admissions ticket says.

  I scrunch my eyes closed thinking of mine. Which says nothing. I have been accepted to a few colleges, but without an athletic scholarship, there’s no way I can commit to going anywhere.

  I’ve talked with old Al at the hardware store. He nodded at my suggestion of starting there on an unpaid internship over the summer. After that, if Ben in Tools & Paint executes his plan of trying out the fish factories in Alaska, I’ll be in with an actual salary.

  I glance up and catch Nadine’s eye on the other side of Step-Cynth. She knows too much. She can’t even look at my father. In the time I’ve known her, she’s barely exchanged a word with him. Thankfully, he’s unaware that my girlfriend is dying for me to never have to see his face again.

  Marla adjusts the microphone, beaming out at us fellow graduates and waving at her proud parents, the director of our bank and the high school principal herself. “Graduation is one of the most important milestones in a person’s life.”

  I should be grateful to have three people sitting on those bleachers for me. If it weren’t for Nadine, I wouldn’t have cared about my grades once my football future fell apart.

  “…a world of new dreams and aspirations. It is after your graduation that you…” Marla throws her hair back in the slight breeze, performing for the masses.

  I screwed up. Dad helped me do that. But I’m excited for Bear. It’s not hard to read the quiet happiness in his eyes now that his future is right in front of him.

  It hasn’t been easy for Bear either, in that small cottage of a house where he lives with four siblings, parents, and a confused great aunt. He’s ready to rock the team up there in Gainesville, and he’s telling me to come visit, that maybe he can talk to his coach once he has “solidified their relationship.” Whatever that means.

  I shake my head and peer into my open palms. Funny how empty they look in my lap today. Maybe I’ll start saving money from our heists. Tell Dad that since I’m running the same risks as him, I’ll only work with him if I get the same pay.

  “He’s so serious,” Liza whispers to Bear, purposely loud enough for me to catch. “Quit it, Cugs. We’re getting outta here tonight, remember? Swamp trip! Yay!”

  “True.” I flick my gaze up to the bleachers and find Nadine. Her expression brightens, and again I think of how she’s too good for me.

  Don’t worry, son. High school relationships never last. You’ll be free to do your thing soon enough.

  I shake off my father’s ignorance. I don’t deserve Nadine, but I don’t like how his words resonate in my head. People say that stuff to remind someone of better options on the horizon. But what if it’s the best thing that will ever happen to you?

  “… my parents, who’ve always stood by me. I also want to thank my classmates, my friends, all you seniors who…” How much longer will she be talking? “… would not have been the same without any of you. So thank you, thank you for…”

  People start to rise afterward. I see Coach first. He claps, and his gaze drifts over the rows until it lands on ours. For a moment, his eyes rest on me, but then they move to Bear. I won’t read anything into it. Coach worked so hard for me. Even after the season was over, he talked with recruiters. Now his attention travels, slowly gliding over the rest of the team.

  I exhale, determined that today will be great. My grades are killer, all but the Trig one, and today I won’t think about how little that means for my future. No, I’ll think of how it feels to have done incredibly well at something. Thanks to the girl up there on the bleachers, I’ve done that well.

  She’s on her feet too, waving. I lift my diploma and wiggle it back and forth. It’s like my smile becomes genuine in the process.

  Around me, the other graduates toss their hats in the air. I do too, but I pick mine back up before I stride toward the exit. Nadine is on her way down. She throws herself into my arms and hugs me so tight. That’s her showing me she’s proud of me, and it’s a tad bit overwhelming.

  We have Mexican for dinner. Tacos and more big smiles. Dad puffs himself up and holds a speech about adulthood. Under the table, my phone buzzes against my thigh. Nadine watches me keenly while I excuse myself and saunter outside.

  The air is hot and humid. Long-distance trailers pass through Main Street, not giving a damn about pollution and fragile lungs of angelic girls. I unlock my screen and read Paislee’s message. She never stops. It’s been months now. Months and months.

  Paislee has found out that it’s my graduation day. Her message is gifs of parties with graduation caps. Champagne bottles that explode and drench happy people.

  Congrats, little rat. I wish I was there.

  So much
love,

  Your big sister, Paislee.

  The formality of her words gets me. I force my emotions back, pressing my fist against my mouth. I’ll go for a run later. Before the party. That’s right, we’re all packed up and ready to head off to the swamps. We’ve got the whole weekend. Dad won’t interrupt—he has promised as much. It’s a freaking amazing thing.

  My eyes fill up anyway. I wish my sister would stop messaging me. Or that it would make sense to reply. I wish that I got to see Mom again. Ha, I’m a momma’s boy to a momma who isn’t mine.

  “Cugs, are you okay?”

  Of course it’s Nadine. I stoop my shoulders, my back to the door. Then I mumble something that’s supposed to be convincing.

  “What’s wrong?” Nadine doesn’t hesitate. She rounds my body and cradles my cheeks with her hands. Then she stares like my only option is to talk.

  “Ah it’s nothing. How ’bout tonight, huh?”

  “Yeah. It’ll be nice.” Nadine keeps scrutinizing me, her words as automatic as mine. Her fingers don’t cease their trajectory over my face.

  I can’t look at her. I want to live now and in the moment. This might very well be the best time of my life. This success, the sleepover with my best friends and my girl. I shouldn’t be ruining this moment with old regrets.

  “Was that Paislee on the phone? Did she message you?”

  I blink back moisture, bobbing my head in confirmation.

  “That’s good, right?” Her cheeks plump in a preemptive smile.

  I nod again but change my mind, shaking it instead. “I don’t know, Nadine. Shit’s a bit complicated.”

  “What did she say?”

  “Congratulated me on graduating. Called me ‘little rat,’” I add stupidly. There’s a quiver in my chin. I cover it with my hand, but she removes it, her smile growing. She paints an imaginary line from my bottom lip and over the muscles I can’t control until she reaches my throat.

  “‘Little rat.’ That’s so silly. Why, did you look like a rat or something?”

  I let out a laugh that sounds like I’m underwater. With the back of my hand, I dry my nose before it can drip. “I guess there was this instance back when I was really little. She was babysitting me. I had long hair for being so small, thick and long, and Mom had bought me a new sailboat. I turned the faucet on in the bathtub and climbed in with it, but I forgot to take my clothes off.”

  “So she called you a rat?” Nadine has the ability to frown with her brows and smile with her eyes at the same time.

  “I guess I looked like a drowned cat.”

  “Which rhymed with rat?” She tries to understand, but I can tell she finds my story sillier by the second. Nadine’s response cleanses me. My chin stops trembling, my lungs expanding with amusement instead.

  “Paislee must have been eight or nine, and I guess she wasn’t fully schooled in all sayings either. She defended herself to Mom afterward, saying I was too little to be a drowned cat, and plus no cat had my dark eyes and pointy little nose, which made ‘drowned rat’ more fitting.”

  Nadine flops against the wall, laughing. “You had a rat face, huh? I can’t even imagine. Look at you now.”

  I shrug, still smiling. My new shirt rubs against the wall as I slide down and sit on the ledge of the flower bed. “She’d be surprised to see how big my rat nose has become.” I wiggle it for her.

  “And crooked,” she adds, winking.

  “Whatever.”

  It’s a break from life.

  Against my side, Nadine leans in, comfortable on the shabby couch in this shabby shack.

  “How much did we pay for this dump again?” I say, watching Liza extend the tattered, moth-eaten remains of a curtain that doesn’t cover the window anymore. I can’t keep a tilted grin off my face.

  “Waay too much.” Bear smacks his hands together in a loud solo applause. “Pretty epic, right?”

  “I thought we got a good deal on it.” Nadine lifts a beer to her mouth. They’re not cold yet, but at least our weekend shack has a fully operating fridge.

  It also has other redeeming qualities: this is so far into the wilderness no one would come here on their own. We’ve invited a couple of friends from the team to visit tonight, and they’ll be parking a mile away like we did. It’ll be interesting to see if they find their way. Then there’re the bedrooms. As in two. They might be small, but they’re separate!

  “A good deal? On this? Not even.” Bear rumble-laughs. “So not even. You paid forty-eight fifty of it. How much did you think we paid total?”

  Nadine shrugs in my arms. She’s absently twisting a bracelet she made for me as a graduation present. It’s tight around my wrist, but I won’t be taking it off. The beads spell out Cugs with a heart on each side. I told her what I really wanted was one that said Nad. Her face lit up at that. “I don’t know. I guess I thought I paid for most of it?”

  “What?” my friends and I say at the same time.

  “You thought we’d take advantage of you?” I stare down at her. “I thought you knew me.” And then I’m hit with the realization that she does know me. She knows what I do, and why wouldn’t I steal from her too, right? Hell, I’ve stolen from her family twice.

  I untangle from her and get up, hands in my hair as I walk the few feet to the window. It gives to a rickety porch outside.

  “Okay, so we’re going straight to the trouble-in-paradise stage even before we get the girls to bed?” Bear asks. “That how we’re rollin’ today?”

  Liza instantly counters with, “Omigod, you’re the crudest ever!”

  I close my eyes. Bear is right. Here I am, ruining an awesome moment again. Nadine slinks up behind me and entwines our fingers on my stomach.

  “No, we paid the same amount each, and it was one ninety-four for two nights. That’s total hotel prices.” I clear my throat halfway through so I don’t come off upset.

  “Sorry, baby. It wasn’t what it sounded like.”

  “I know. I’m sorry too. For before. For this.”

  “They’re sorry for a bunch of stuff,” Bear says to Liza, opening and closing the fridge door. “You want to test out the mattress in the master suite while they’re doing the sorry-thing?”

  “No, I want to scavenger-hunt. Do you think they have banjos here? My bet is there’s a couple on the porch.”

  “In that case, Imma gettin’ into my canoe and paddling off,” I say in my broadest backwoods accent.

  It does the trick. The moment brightens again. Liza giggles, and Nadine’s arms squeeze tighter around me. I loosen them so I can turn and give her a kiss. “Are you up for a walk around here before it gets dark?”

  “Yup, let’s go. I’m bringing alligator repellant.”

  “Oh right, let me get it for you.” Bear fumbles inside a grocery bag and holds up a rotisserie chicken.

  “Drop your ‘gun,’ sir!” Liza points at her boyfriend. She leads the way out the door. “Can you imagine the blood fest?”

  We brave the rotten boards of the porch on our way out.

  “Wow, look at the rocking chairs,” Nadine says.

  “Those are the rocking chairs of death. Try that one, Bear.” I jut my chin at the specimen in front of the left window. It boasts a single armrest. “Crazily enough it’s still in one piece.”

  “Ha, I might try it later tonight,” Bear replies, holding up his beer.

  We’re not as far from civilization as we thought. There are actually several other cabins in the area. None of them have ghostly porches and tattered curtains. Who knows, they might even have indoor toilets.

  “Oh looky!” Liza shouts from the backside of a house that’s actually painted. It’s red with a roof that’s not even saddle-backed. “They’ve got a stereo with, like, a speaker system and everything. Do you think they come here a lot? Maybe it’s someone’s love ne
st. Ooh, the horrible husband totally takes his mistress here, and the wife doesn’t even know about it.”

  “My girlfriend’s mind scares me,” Bear tells me as we round the corner to peer in with the girls. Sure enough, the living room has a stereo with four speakers lined up on top of it. Idly, I wonder if they always keep them close together like that. It can’t do much for the surround sound.

  “Why didn’t we rent this place instead?” Liza asks.

  “Oh I don’t know, maybe because it wasn’t what was brokered at the hardware store? But hey, next time you take care of the accommodations.” Bear lifts her like it’s nothing and tips her over his shoulder. “Now, enough complaints. It’s getting dark, I’m hungry, and I want my alligator bait.”

  “It’s not bedtime yet,” Nadine sing-songs.

  “Oh my god, Nadine.” Liza laughs, hair swinging from her position over Bear’s shoulder. “He means the roasted chicken, not me.”

  I high-five Nadine. When her palm meets mine, I catch her hand and pull it to my mouth. “Bear’s right,” I say against it. “We need to down that chicken before the party starts. Once the gang arrives, we’re hosed.”

  “Oh yes, and let’s hide tomorrow’s food. What if they get the munchies and start eating everything we brought? Gotta find a good place for it, some closet or what-have-you.” Liza’s pitch wobbles when Bear starts in on a gallop. “Put me down, silly bear!”

  “Y’all meet Jake from Juvi? Sorry, Jake.” Ryder play-punches his friend’s shoulder. “He’s really from Royal Park. You just got out though, didn’t you? ’Grats again.”

  Jake’s pallor makes me wonder how long he was locked up, and when he grins, I think of rodents.

  “Thanks. Got any beer?” His voice is thin, which matches his stature. A head shorter than most guys our age, he makes up for it with his don’t-screw-with-me glint.

  “You’re having wuss juice?” Ryder mock-covers his mouth. “Oh shit. Kidding, Jake. Careful with him ’cause they gave him his knife back.”

  Darkness clings to the walls of our shack, and the small living room is so crowded it spills onto the porch. Half of the football team is present. Ryder must have found out through the grapevine, because we sure as hell didn’t invite him.