Winning the Player

by Leesa Bow

  I stared at my hands in my lap. ‘Kind of,’ I murmured, lacing my fingers in an effort to control my nerves. ‘He said he hadn’t slept with anyone for months and as much as I wanted to believe him I had my doubts. And his secrets, well there was something going on with him. But I never offered him the time to discuss it either.’

  ‘Then you were trying to change him. My question is do you believe a leopard can change its spots?’

  I shrugged. ‘He sounded sincere when we made promises to each other.’

  Gran chuckled. ‘Aubree, he’s a man with a memory of a sieve. I believe he had good intentions, but with his football, and being at the pinnacle of his career, there are many women throwing themselves at him.’

  ‘I know, but . . .’ Was I really going to explain and defend Hunter to Gran’s every question? I got her point. Hunter had blinded me.

  ‘Every girl has her heart set on winning a special guy. One who is almost unreachable. She imagines him in an ivory tower and she endeavours to climb it and prove her worth, win him over in an act of bravery and perseverance. Her only bravery is risking her heart to someone not worthy of it. When she realises the truth, it’s too late. He’s shattered her heart and soul.’

  I looked up and met her gaze, realising she was talking from experience.

  ‘What did you do?’ I asked gently.

  ‘I met a man who truly understood what it meant to care for my heart. A man who treated my heart like it was his own.’

  I laughed and choked at the same time. ‘Men have changed over the years, Gran.’

  ‘Thank God for that,’ she said mockingly. ‘But true gentlemen are still out there. To move on means setting rules. Don’t give in to your heart. Believe in yourself, acknowledge the strong woman inside of you, strive to be her.’

  ‘Gran doesn’t believe in second chances,’ Mum added.

  ‘You mean third and fourth chances.’ I sighed.

  Gran narrowed her eyes at me. ‘I have something for you. Give me a minute.’ She pushed back her chair from the table and I watched as she headed inside, the hem of her floral dress bobbing as she limped.

  Mum moved her chair closer and peeped at me with caring green eyes. She put her arm on the table and opened her hand, gesturing for me to place mine in her palm. I unclasped my fingers and placed my hand on top of hers. Mum smiled apprehensively.

  ‘I want you to know I’ll be okay,’ I said in a flat voice. ‘I’m struggling now but I’m better than this. I’ll get through it. I promise you I won’t do anything silly, I won’t run.’

  Mum closed her eyes and slowly opened them again. ‘I know,’ she whispered. ‘Gran has something for you. She’s been waiting for the right time to give it to you. Now seemed right.’

  The back door swung open and Gran appeared holding a small box. She waddled over and sat in the chair next to me, then folded her hands in her lap. I glanced at the box on the table then back at Gran.

  ‘Turquoise is a stone that has been in my family for generations.’ I looked at the turquoise stone that hung around her neck which I’d never given much consideration. I turned back to Gran as she continued. ‘It symbolises many things. My family believes the gem holds the power of protection and therefore must be cared for by the owner.’ She paused as if to check I was listening. ‘Turquoise can help with inner strength and my giving it to you will bring you good fortune. It conveys peace.’ She nodded once. ‘Open the box, Aubree.’

  My fingers shook as I lifted the lid. I glanced at Gran but she pretended not to notice.

  ‘Open it,’ she said again.

  I looked inside, lifted the silver chain holding a silver star. Inside the star was a large turquoise gemstone. ‘Thank you.’ I stood and hugged Gran. I nestled my nose into her curly grey hair and took in her lavender scent. ‘It means a lot.’

  ‘Put it on.’

  The star sat between my breasts, close to my heart. ‘I love it.’

  ‘Treasure it,’ she instructed. ‘Like it’s part of you.’

  My fingers lightly stroked the stone. ‘I will.’

  ‘Go for a walk along the beach, Aubree. Clear your mind,’ Mum suggested. She reached across and touched my arm. ‘Everyone goes through something that will change them forever.’ She blinked slowly, acknowledging both of our journeys.

  ‘You’re right. I think I’ll take that walk and be back before lunch. Thank you both. I don’t know what I’d do without you.’

  The sun sat high in a cloudless blue sky. A slight breeze blew from the ocean filling my senses. A few seagulls hovered overhead and the waves crashed in rhythm along the shore, reminding me of a relaxation CD.

  I kicked off my thongs so I could walk in the sand and feel the soft particles squeeze up between my toes. I pulled out my phone from my denim shorts pocket, turned it on and waited for it to come to life.

  Only a few people walked along the beach and I loved that it wasn’t busy like many city beaches. Gran lived in a quiet paradise and I imagined the country seaside life could be my calling. Seconds after my phone lit up it vibrated several times, indicating new messages.

  Maddy McIntyre two missed calls.

  Hunter Stone seven missed calls.

  I held my breath. Do I call him, only to face disappointment again in another month or so? Five text messages registered, one from Maddy, four from Hunter. I opened Maddy’s text.

  Call Hunter and let him explain!

  Not helpful, Mads.

  I read Hunter’s last message.

  Where the hell are you? At least give me a chance to try to explain myself.

  I closed my eyes.

  You’re stronger than this, Taylor. The voice of my old coach echoed in my head.

  Did I really want to go down that road again? Hunter would convince me to give him another chance. He had a way with words that blinded me from the truth. I deleted his other messages without reading them. A single tear trickled down my cheek.

  I opened up Twitter. Hunter had sent several messages. I deleted all of them. I couldn’t chance letting down my guard, even though I was consoled that he’d checked my Twitter account. I typed a tweet.

  @AubsTaylor: Giving someone another chance is like giving them another bullet because they missed the first time.

  I stared out across the ocean and listened to the sounds around me. I closed my eyes and concentrated on breathing deeply. I jumped when my phone buzzed in my hand. Hunter calling. My finger lingered over decline. Why put off the inevitable? If I didn’t answer he’d only persist.

  I could do this. I breathed out. ‘Hello, Hunter.’

  ‘Where the hell are you?’ he yelled.

  I closed my eyes, feeling his anger ripple through me. ‘Somewhere you can’t find me.’

  ‘What the fuck are you playing at, Aubree? At least let me explain.’

  My eyes opened wide. ‘I’m not playing at anything,’ I said calmly. ‘I can’t believe you didn’t trust me. I don’t think you understand —’

  I stared at the black screen of my phone. It was dead. Adrenaline pumped through my veins. Perhaps it was for the best. Some things were better left unsaid. I was supposed to be clearing my mind, yet my insides fluttered at hearing the sound of Hunter’s voice. I sighed. At least now my phone wouldn’t distract me.

  My fingers tightened around my necklace and I closed my eyes, only to see Hunter’s gorgeous face. ‘No,’ I murmured, pushing him out of my head.

  I imagined an inner strength building within. Strong walls pushing up, protecting my heart, my soul.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  After an hour of walking and thinking I headed back to Gran’s house. Hearing Hunter’s voice tore at my heart and triggered memories of the good times, like how he held me at night as though he was afraid to let go. Instead of feeling stronger after pushing him away, I felt hollow.

  I had promised my mother I wouldn’t leave again, but I felt afraid that if I stayed I wouldn’t have the strength to keep my head afloat. I touch
ed the necklace on my chest; my fingers caressed the turquoise centre, seeking the strength my grandmother possessed. I closed my eyes and imagined the hole in my chest closing, endeavouring to be strong for my family.

  When I walked through the front door and into the hallway, I could see Mum sitting at the kitchen table. Gran leant over her shoulder, both staring at something.

  ‘Hey,’ I said. Mum turned to me, and her green eyes rounded.

  Gran turned quickly. ‘Oh, we didn’t hear you come in.’

  Mum closed the newspaper in front of her. ‘We’re reading an article about your partnership with Rachel Bond to coach juniors and how basketball would only benefit by the return of Aubree Taylor.’

  ‘It’s kind of the journalist to write so highly of you. I’ll cut it out,’ Gran suggested. ‘You can read it after.’

  ‘Must know his basketball and a good story when he sees it,’ I joked. I smiled at Gran. ‘I’ll read it now.’ I needed motivation to help move on from Hunter, if only in my head.

  Mum pushed the paper to the centre of the table. ‘Lunch is ready. You can read it after lunch.’

  I narrowed my eyes at her. ‘I’d like to read it now.’ Mum stared back at me, not saying a word. ‘What else is in it?’ I reached around her to pick up the newspaper. I flipped it over and my stomach clenched. My gaze fixed on an image of Hunter, kicking a football, plastered across the back page. The headline, ‘Aiming for Higher Goals’ above the photo. In small print I read, story continued on p104. Without thinking, I turned to the page. It was the same image I’d witnessed on the television, Sabrina kissing Hunter, amongst his friends—friends he trusted. I felt sick. My world must have slowed as the room moved. I grabbed hold of the table and closed my eyes.

  ‘Aubree,’ Mum whispered, barely audible.

  ‘What page is the article?’ I asked dryly. I opened my eyes, determined not to cave.

  Mum leaned over my shoulder, turned the page and pointed to a smaller section at the bottom. ‘Thank you,’ I whispered back.

  It didn’t take long to read. My news hardly compared to Hunter’s two-page spread. My chest rose and fell at a faster-than-normal rate and I could feel two sets of eyes burning into my back. ‘I’ll call Rachel when I get home. Looks like I have some extra planning to do.’

  Mum placed a hand on my back. ‘It’s a wonderful opportunity.’

  Gran reached over and grabbed the paper. ‘Enough,’ she said firmly. She pulled out the page containing my article and then screwed up the remaining newspaper, forcefully pushing it into the rubbish bin. She brushed her hands together several times. ‘Good riddance!’

  I smiled at her and looked at Mum, mouth gaping, and then she burst out laughing. It wasn’t funny but the three of us laughed. Not so much at the situation but at Gran. I could imagine her striking a match and setting fire to the bin then performing some kind of celebratory dance around it.

  ‘Right.’ Gran grabbed three wine glasses. ‘I think we need to have a drink to salute the future.’ She opened a bottle of red wine and poured the crimson liquid into the crystal glasses. Mum removed the casserole from the oven and placed it on the table. Steam rose above the shepherd’s pie and the kitchen instantly smelled like a bakery.

  We took our places at the table. Gran raised her wine glass and Mum and I followed her lead. Gran set her gaze on me, then my mother, before looking to her glass in the air.

  ‘I read somewhere that one’s strength lies within family.’ Her green eyes lowered to me. ‘Remember your choices have consequences so learn from the past, appreciate the present, and without fear embrace the future.’

  ‘To our future,’ Mum added.

  I glanced quickly at Gran then Mum before tilting the glass to my lips.

  ‘I’m glad you like my Bundaleer wine,’ Gran said with a smile. ‘Now let’s eat.’

  I heard a distant banging noise, unsure if it was real or in my dream. My eyes refused to open. I heard footsteps along the creaky hallway. Ignoring the disturbance, I snuggled under the quilt.

  ‘May I help you?’ Gran’s voice sounded in the distance.

  I groaned and rolled over. My eyes opened enough to see it was still daylight. I remembered having a hearty pie for lunch and finishing the bottle of red with Gran. Mum had suggested we all take an afternoon nap. I glanced at the book I was reading earlier, face down on the bed next to me, opened on the page before I’d drifted off. It was unlike me to sleep in the afternoon.

  ‘Do not think you can come here demanding anything.’ My eyes widened at Gran’s angry tone.

  ‘I just want a chance to talk to her.’ A deep voice said loudly, sounding desperate.

  Shit!

  I sat up, my heart hammering at the sound of Hunter’s voice.

  ‘I think you’ve used up all your chance cards, young man. Aubree doesn’t want to see you.’

  I stumbled out of bed and stood in the doorway, holding onto the wooden frame until I regained some balance. I peeped around the corner and held my breath. Hunter looked gorgeous, more so than a model, wearing tight jeans and an untucked white casual shirt rolled up to the elbows. He stood sideways looking at the driveway to my car. His hands fisted on his hips. When he turned to face my grandmother his blue eyes glared like he was losing patience. His hand lifted to his short black hair and he pushed his fingers over the top of his head.

  ‘Please ask her if she’d give me one minute. I only need one minute,’ he pleaded.

  ‘I don’t play games, Mr Stone.’ Hunter’s brow arched at my gran calling him by name. She continued. ‘When I say she doesn’t want to see you, I mean she doesn’t want to see you.’ Gran emphasised the last five words.

  I stepped out into the hallway. ‘It’s okay, Gran. I’ll talk to him,’ I said softly, surprising myself.

  Hunter’s mouth gaped. His eyes fixed on me.

  Gran spun around. ‘Aubree, you don’t have to do this.’

  I nodded. ‘Yes, I do.’ Then I looked at Hunter. ‘Just give me a moment and I’ll come outside.’

  He looked down at Gran. ‘I’ll wait in the car.’

  Gran closed the front door, indicating he was not welcome. She waddled up to me, reached for my hands and squeezed tight.

  ‘Are you sure you know what you’re doing?’ Her green eyes looked deep into mine.

  ‘No. I can’t shake this feeling that I should hear him out. I know it’ll be my undoing, but I have to trust my instincts.’

  Gran smiled. ‘I understand, dear. Your mother and I are here if you need us.’ Mum’s arm wrapped around my waist.

  ‘We love you,’ Mum added. ‘Think about what you intend to say and how Hunter will interpret it. Be wise.’

  I headed to the bathroom to change into a dress. My heart hadn’t slowed since hearing his voice. I pulled out the tie to my ponytail, brushed my hair straight then lightly applied makeup to brighten my face.

  What the hell was I going to say to him? There were a hundred questions, but none really mattered. He had shattered the trust between us, leaving nothing but a lie.

  Minutes later I stepped out of the bathroom to find Mum and Gran sitting out the back under the pergola. I assumed they were giving me space. When I opened the front door my body sprang to life on seeing Hunter leaning against his car, arms folded, his gaze fixed on the ground. He looked up as I walked towards him. He straightened, and opened the front passenger door.

  I stopped more than a few metres away, looked him in the eye. He took a step towards me but I raised my hand, gesturing for him to stop. He blinked slowly, registering.

  ‘How did you find me?’

  ‘Did you think I wouldn’t?’ He pushed his hand over his head. ‘Maddy helped figure it out. Can we go somewhere and talk?’

  I swallowed back relief and uncertainty mixed together. ‘Where?’

  ‘My place.’ His eyes studied my face, trying to read me, but I was determined not to give him a damn thing, to remain strong.

  ‘No.’ I looked awa
y. I needed neutral ground. ‘The beach.’ At least if things turned ugly I could walk back to Gran’s.

  I stepped around him and sat in the car. Hunter closed my door, took long strides around the front of the car to his door. He sat in the driver’s seat and revved the engine. He glanced sideways. ‘Thank you.’

  We drove in silence for the few minutes it took to get to the beach. As soon as Hunter parked the car he pressed a button and the doors locked.

  I glared at him.

  ‘I need to say a few things.’ His voice quivered.

  ‘Fine, but unlock the doors. I’m not a child nor your prisoner,’ I said dryly.

  ‘No. But you’ve been known to run.’ His gaze remained on my face as he pressed a button to unlock the doors.

  ‘Is this how it’s going to be? Because —’

  He grabbed my hand, one finger stroking the infinity ring. At that moment I cursed myself for not removing it, but deep down I knew it had signified hope, not just for Hunter, for my future. His large hands enveloped mine. ‘I don’t want to lose you,’ he said quickly. ‘All those Twitter messages scared the fuck out of me. I’m guessing your phone died.’ I nodded, wanting to say more but didn’t know where to start. ‘Then I want to show you something.’ With one hand he let go of mine and reached for his phone, scrolled with his thumb then turned the screen towards me.

  Maybe you’re better off without me, but I’m not better off without you.

  His other hand squeezed my fingers, reaching out to me. I didn’t respond. It wasn’t enough.

  ‘And then I sent you another text message,’ he added. He tapped on his phone then turned the screen towards me.

  You don’t know how much it hurts when you ignore me. I can’t lose you because if I did then I’ve lost everything. The only mistake I’ve made was falling in love with you because I thought you’d fallen for me, too.

  He stared wide-eyed, waiting for me to respond.

  I looked away, to the ocean, slowly pulling my hand from his and placing it in my lap. ‘I think you’ve confused love with lust because lust doesn’t require trust.’ I turned back and looked him in the eye, needing to see his reaction. ‘You think you love me yet you don’t trust me. That’s where we differ. I’ll always trust the person I love.’