by Regan Black
Still, she felt too exposed out here, especially with a baby in her arms.
Kelsey reached for her phone, her first instinct to call Fox. No point. Being watched wasn’t the same as being in danger. It could be anyone up there in the sedan. Her brothers, the person who dropped off the baby, possibly a tourist or businessman who’d lost his way. Fox had enough to deal with today, she wouldn’t pile on her old baggage and paranoia, as well.
Boosting John on her hip, she knew it was better to be safe than give Fox reason for worry and she dialed Wyatt and Bailey’s house. While the phone rang and rang, she realized just how antsy she was about that car. “Hello?” Bailey answered in a rush.
“Hi. It’s Kelsey. Baby John and I wondered if you and Hudson were up for a visit.”
“If ‘visit’ is code for ‘this mommy gets a nap,’ definitely. Why doesn’t my son ever sleep?”
Kelsey laughed as she walked inside and up the stairs. “I can give time for a nap.”
There was a long pause. “You’re serious.”
“Well, sure.” Bailey didn’t know it, but she’d be giving Kelsey a sense of security in trade.
“It sounds divine,” the other woman admitted. “But I couldn’t ask you to do that. Just come on over. I’m sure adult conversation will be just as refreshing.”
She was probably right. Kelsey had seen it often enough growing up. She gathered up Baby John’s diaper bag and loaded him into the truck. When she glanced toward the trees, the black sedan was gone.
* * *
Pulling up to the house on the other side of the ranch, she found Bailey in a porch rocker, her son snuggled up on her shoulder. They made the cutest pair.
“You and I need to be quiet,” Kelsey said to Baby John as she got him out of the car. “Bailey and Hudson need some downtime.”
Baby John watched her with wide eyes as she spoke. She liked to think he understood on some level, though plenty of experts would say otherwise.
Bailey gave her a big smile as Kelsey walked up. “Hudson’s actually dozing,” she whispered.
“Fresh air wipes them out,” Kelsey replied. She sat on the top step of the porch with Baby John.
Bailey yawned. “We’ll see. You and Fox lucked out, starting with a baby that sleeps through the night.”
Kelsey laughed, though the idea of being with Fox as a couple wound around her heart like a blooming vine. It was so easy to imagine a life here with him, so easy to want more than she had any right to ask for. “He’ll be in for a rude awakening when he starts from day one,” Bailey said.
“Pun intended?”
Bailey paused, then chuckled. “Definitely.”
“Other than the lack of sleep, how’s he doing?” Kelsey asked.
“Perfect on all fronts,” Bailey replied with a maternal glow. “I’ve been warned about colic and everything else that can go wrong from head to toe, but he’s fine. He just doesn’t sleep more than a blink at a time.”
“He will,” Kelsey promised again. One of her youngest brothers had been like Hudson. She wasn’t sure how her mother would’ve gotten through that first month without Kelsey and her sisters to help.
“You’re a comfort, Kelsey, thank you.”
“I meant what I said about giving you time to sleep.”
“No, thank you. That’s silly. Wyatt’s been coming home early and giving me a nap before dinner. And we tag-team the baby through the night,” Bailey explained. “I’d much rather talk with a grown-up.”
Kelsey couldn’t help but smile at that. “A grown-up maybe. But a good chunk of my days goes to the care of this little guy.” She covered her face with her hands and then parted them, to John’s delight.
“Not forever.”
“No.” And though she’d tried not to get attached, she knew she’d miss the baby terribly when Fox found John’s family or an appropriate solution.
When she’d finished college, she’d vowed to leave child care and children behind her. But Baby John had somehow found a way through the wall she’d built around her heart.
“You like him,” Bailey observed.
“The baby?” Kelsey asked. “Of course I do. He’s a very likable baby.”
Bailey rolled her eyes. “You know I meant Fox.”
Fox and Baby John together were irresistible. “It’s a good thing to like the boss,” Kelsey said, deliberately misunderstanding.
Whatever Bailey wanted to say was interrupted by Hudson waking. “Here we go again. Round two hundred forty-two.” She sighed. “And that’s just counting today.”
Kelsey followed her inside the house and they chatted while she changed and fed Hudson. When the baby was full, Kelsey offered to hold him for a bit.
“Let me take him. I can manage both of them,” she said. “Go shower or sleep. Take a walk if you’d like.” Recalling the sedan she’d seen, Kelsey cringed at the suggestion and hid the expression with a series of silly faces aimed at John.
“You really won’t hate me for leaving him with you?”
“I offered. Go on,” she urged, cuddling Hudson close. “Shoo.”
Bailey flapped her arms. “They’re empty. This feels so weird.”
“Enjoy it.” Kelsey gave the boys her full attention, ignoring Bailey until she darted down the hallway.
“Ten minutes. Fifteen, tops,” she called back.
“Mommies need quiet time, too,” she told Hudson. The little guy looked just like his daddy. “Colton genes run strong in you,” she said. But when she compared Baby John and Hudson, there were differences.
How long would Fox wait before he approached his cousin about the baby? She understood his need to have the whole picture, but once he’d identified the most likely father, Mason, he’d been in no hurry to confront his cousin.
Finding out half your life was a lie could be distracting.
She hadn’t been in Fox’s employ too long, but it was evident how much he valued family. Leaning close to Hudson, she bumped his nose with hers. “You are a kissable little guy.”
Baby John kicked out his feet and hands, gurgling to get her attention. Shifting Hudson, she moved to tickle John’s tummy. He giggled, his fingers curling around her hand. “Of course you’re my favorite six-month-old,” she told him. “And we’re making new friends, aren’t we? You’re a natural.”
“So are you.”
Kelsey swiveled to see Bailey standing at the end of the hallway watching her. “You’ve got Hudson mesmerized and John devoted.”
“The feeling’s mutual.”
Bailey joined her, smelling fresh and clean after a shower. “Count me in as one of your new fans. It was heaven knowing I could take my time in the shower.”
“And yet, here you are, way too soon.” She rocked Hudson on her up drawn knees. “I’ve got this.”
“Maybe I’m here to find out how,” Bailey admitted.
Kelsey felt the weight of Bailey’s intent study. “I come from a big family,” she began. “Twelve kids.” At least that had been the count when she’d left. “Being one of the oldest, I got plenty of practice with babies.”
Bailey pressed a hand to her tummy. “Twelve? I think my uterus just whimpered.”
Kelsey laughed, the sound startling Hudson. He jerked, then settled again. “See?” Kelsey whispered. “That’s progress.”
“I’ll say. Be right back.” Bailey dashed to the kitchen and returned with a bottle of water for herself and a cola for Kelsey. “Is this good?”
“Great, thanks.” She carefully opened the bottle and took a long drink. After her first taste of pop after escaping her family it had become her favorite treat. She hadn’t known a beverage could be so much fun. So many things, away from the strict rules of home, had been delightful discoveries.
Bailey played peek-a-boo with Baby John. “Have you and Fox found his fat
her yet?” she asked in a singsong voice.
“He’s definitely part of the Colton family tree. It’s not Wyatt,” she joked. Dodging Bailey’s theatrical glare, she went on. “Fox thinks the father is one of the cousins.” She wasn’t comfortable sharing any more details of their findings without his permission.
“Do you think his mother dropped him on the doorstep?” Bailey asked.
Kelsey thought about the black sedan near Fox’s place and the active Avalanche Killer case. “That’s my guess, but it’s possible someone else had other reasons for leaving him with Fox. Knowing the baby is a Colton, Fox won’t hand him over to the foster system until he knows the parents’ wishes.”
“Not after what happened to him,” Bailey agreed.
Kelsey watched John. He was on the verge of sitting up by himself. “You know Fox pretty well.”
Bailey smiled. She was ready to catch the baby if he rolled, but she gave him plenty of room to figure out the sitting thing. “He and Wyatt are close.”
Closer than Bailey even knew, Kelsey thought.
“It’s nice to see Fox happy,” Bailey said. “He’s always had his work, but with the baby and you...”
Kelsey waited for her to finish. She had no desire to tiptoe through that minefield without a map.
“Did I say something wrong? I thought you liked him.”
She’d been well past liking Fox before she knocked on his door the first time. With each passing day, she learned something more about him and her original infatuation simmered closer toward true and substantial feelings. The kiss had only bound the physical and emotional elements, tying her in knots over what to do next.
Still, she wasn’t sure this was the right time or circumstance to explore anything she felt for Fox. He was falling for the baby. She was falling for the man and, while she adored Baby John, she planned to leave babies out of her long-term equation.
“I’m just his assistant moonlighting as the nanny,” Kelsey said. Heat flooded her cheeks at the denial, her mind relishing the feel of their first kiss.
Bailey wasn’t fooled. “You do like him. Your cheeks are on fire.” She chuckled. “Not that I blame you.”
“For blushing?”
“For liking Fox. He’s great, though most of the time he seems to get lost in his work.”
“He does.” Kelsey swallowed, thinking of Fox reading through his reports. Good grief, those glasses did things for her. “We both do.” She cleared her throat. “Before you get lost in a matchmaking fantasy—”
“Too late.”
“You should know I am committed to the work he’s doing with quarter horses. If I have to make a choice, I’ll choose the office over the man.”
Bailey tilted her head, her gaze narrowing. “I almost believe you.”
Hudson fussed, and Kelsey handed him over so Bailey could feed him. She’d been honest and clear. It wasn’t her fault if the other woman didn’t want to accept it. Baby John rolled to his tummy and pushed up on his arms, scooching backward. He worked himself into a seated position and grinned at Kelsey.
“Look at you!” she praised. The baby giggled. “Such a big boy.”
“My goodness,” Bailey marveled. “He did it.”
“He’ll be crawling in another month or two,” Kelsey said. Fox would have to find a new solution once the baby was more mobile. The office was no place for an active tyke. Maybe they could partition off more space or adjust her hours—
No. She cut off her runaway thoughts. Fox had promised the nanny role was temporary and secondary to her role as his assistant. She trusted him to keep his word. He would reach out to the father soon and then they could make plans.
“What will Fox do if the father isn’t interested in stepping up?” Bailey asked as if reading her thoughts.
“He hasn’t discussed any of the options with me,” Kelsey replied.
“Fox is serious about strong family ties,” Bailey said. “I’m only guessing, but it makes sense that the abandoned baby dredges up all that pain and loss he felt when his parents died. It must have been a dreadful adjustment. Wyatt thinks Fox took in the baby in some attempt at payback.”
Kelsey had seen similar indicators in Fox’s words and actions. “He hasn’t told me too much about that transition. When we’re at work, we try to stay on task.” Not easy with the baby, and now he was overwhelmed by the secrets his adoptive parents had kept.
“Russ instilled a solid work ethic in all of his kids.” Bailey moved Hudson to her shoulder, patting his back gently. “He was a workaholic, but I think his kids are searching for a better balance. I know Wyatt is really conscientious about that. I hope Fox will be, too.”
“Does Wyatt worry about repeating his dad’s mistakes as a parent?”
“Don’t we all?” Bailey countered.
“Guess so.” She didn’t think her brothers worried about being good fathers as much as they aspired to have obedient wives and children. They surely also wanted a dutiful sister who would guarantee the financial stability of the family for years to come. Kelsey knew she’d never be able to follow the example her mother had set. She needed more in her life than having and raising children.
Kelsey popped up to her feet and brought John back to the center of his blanket. He’d been rolling and sitting and scooting all around. She and Bailey chatted a bit longer about baby milestones and expectations and Kelsey promised to come back for another playdate soon.
When she left a chipper and glowing Bailey with a snoozing baby Hudson, she headed back to Fox’s house with John babbling happily in the car seat. In her mind Bailey’s question echoed endlessly. What would Fox do if the real father didn’t want to raise Baby John?
She couldn’t see Fox turning the baby over to foster care. Bailey had been right on target about Fox’s commitment to family. However he moved forward, she needed to be clear with him that her primary interest in Roaring Springs was the horse breeding. The baby was wonderful, but she needed more than nanny detail.
Her palms went damp on the steering wheel and she had to pull over for a minute to steady her breathing. There was no reason to stress about any of this. Letting her old issues and insecurities creep in and blot out the joy of her current position was silly. Fox valued her as his assistant and he’d given her no cause to doubt his promises about her future with Crooked C Quarter Horses.
Chapter 9
Fox’s mind whirled, his ears ringing with the accusations Russ and Mara were shouting at each other as he’d left. Stunned, frustrated and inexplicably more hurt than he wanted to admit, he pulled to a stop in front of the red barn he called home.
He couldn’t go into the office with his emotions so twisted up and his temper running hot. How would he face the innocent baby whose arrival set all this into motion or the woman who’d looked at him with such concern when he’d headed out?
Logically, he needed space and time to process the facts that had turned everything inside out, yet part of him craved Kelsey. More than genetic expert or reasonable colleague, who would listen without judgment, he wanted to lose himself in the sweet softness of her lips.
He stalked into the foyer and was reaching for the office door before it registered that they weren’t inside. They weren’t upstairs either, but he found a note that explained Kelsey had taken the baby over to visit with Bailey and Hudson.
Fox crushed the note in his fist, the disappointment and loneliness burning like salt poured into an open wound. Well, if he had the space, he’d best use it.
With some good daylight left, he strode to the barn and saddled up Mags for a head-clearing trail ride. He rode out hard across the property, the mare under him responsive and keen for the action. As he kept his gaze on the western horizon, the recriminations circled in his mind.
He’d torn up his family, wrought havoc on the two people who’d raised him as their own. And fo
r what? He hated admitting Mara was right. Tossing his true parentage out into the light wouldn’t change anything.
Out here under the clear, deepening blue of the evening sky, he couldn’t remember what he’d hoped to gain.
So what if all of his brothers and sisters were half siblings by blood? They still shared the history of growing up together, a tangle of affection and rivalries and proud and embarrassing milestones. The same holiday traditions anchored by treasured memories.
All he’d really gained was a rational explanation for Mara’s reserve and perpetual criticism of him. In her place could he or anyone else have managed a better relationship? He wanted his answer to be a resounding yes, but there was no real way to know.
He supposed he should call Sloane. Hearing this news from anyone else was bound to upset her and he’d dished out enough distress for one day. Slowing the mare, he let Mags meander along the edge of the little-used access road that divided his acreage from Wyatt’s. He pulled his phone from the inside pocket of his field jacket and dialed her number.
Sloane picked up with a happy greeting and in the background he heard his niece singing away. “Do you have a minute?” he asked.
“For you, always. Chloe and I are playing dress-up and getting fancy before Liam gets home.”
His niece squealed, and Fox held the phone away from his ear, though the sound made him smile.
“Is everything okay with the baby?”
“Thanks to Kelsey it is.”
Sloane laughed. “You lucked out there. Have you bought him his first Stetson?”
“I thought I’d teach him to smoke first.” It felt so normal to joke around with her. She was the one constant he’d had through every facet of his life. “I’m sorry to take the shine off dress-up time, but there’s something you should know.”
Sloane gasped. “You are the father of that baby.”
“I’m not.” I’m also just your half brother. He couldn’t blurt it out that way. “The DNA results gave us a pretty good idea of Baby John Doe’s daddy.”
