The Team and the Cavern

by S G Read

'Here in the wood I suppose, unless you know somewhere we could hide them all, Fergus? Stuart one answered.

  Stuart one had imagined them holding each leprechaun before they changed him back and explaining just what was going on, with all the other leprechauns there for them to see. Now he could see that that was impossible, they needed to explain what was going on and then lead them to where the rest were hiding. They had to explain to each one that it was necessary to make sure the apprentice did not know what was going on. It would take longer that way but it was a better system than risking a haphazard attack and having a raft of leprechauns turned into stone in one stroke.

  ‘We could hide them in the village?’ Fergus answered.

  ‘The village,’ Stuart one repeated, ‘we haven’t seen any villages since we've been in here.’

  ‘There is one though. It is overrun with weeds now but it used to be a happy place where we could sing and talk. We also had parties to end all parties.’ The leprechaun answered. ‘It was one of those parties which let us down in the end. The apprentice must have waited until we were having one of our parties, locked the wizard in the dungeon and came straight to the village. He stood on the hill above the village and turned all of the people in the village to stone. I know what he did, I watched him from the ridge. I was drunk at the time and passed out soon after I watched him do it. Later when I sobered up I figured out that he must have outwitted the wizard somehow and locked him inside one of the dungeons. When I worked that out I tried to get in to free the wizard but the apprentice saw me and turned me to stone. For some reason I was reborn to try again and I have been trying to free the wizard ever since.’

  ‘I think we should definitely go and look at this village.’ Celia one replied. ‘It sounds like there is a whole army there ready to go to war, after we have turned them back from stone.’

  ‘I’ll take you there.’ Fergus offered and started walking.

  The leprechaun walked through the dark forest, going deeper and deeper into the forest. They followed him as he walked toward what the team assumed was the middle of the end of that section of this nether world. He kept walking through the forest but none of the team was scared, with the white leprechaun in front and the two Simons behind them, they were safe from any of the animals they saw. When they reached the middle, there was an opening in the rock, like a cave, and he walked in with them following into the darkness. Soon they all walked out the other side, back into daylight. There in front of them was a village and it was full of Stone leprechauns.

  ‘This is the village girls and boys. We should be able to beat the apprentice with this lot.’ Fergus announced. ‘I had forgotten about this place.’ He added. 'I was too busy fighting the apprentice to come and make sure my family was alright.’

  ‘That is sad.’ Jenny replied.

  'It does explain a lot though,' Toby one replied, 'you have been copied so many times that it must have affected you, that is why now you turn everyone to stone first and ask questions later.'

  ‘So does that mean that these leprechauns won’t all be homicidal maniacs?’ Stuart two asked.

  ‘It does but we should leave the ones on the plinths, they are your actual homicidal maniacs as you call them and we had to punish them!’ Fergus answered.

  ‘They might be useful in the fight.’ Ben one argued.

  ‘They might also turn on us and fight for the apprentice.’ Ben two argued back.

  ‘Don’t squabble amongst yourself Ben.’ Jenny one ordered.

  ‘Why not?’ Ben one asked. ‘This way I can have a conversation with myself. It is quite strange really talking to yourself like this.’

  ‘It looks silly, that is why. Surely you should both be saying the same thing, even if you are wrong.’ Jenny one answered.

  ‘Where’s the fun in that?’ Ben two replied.

  ‘I think a vote is needed.’ Stuart one declared.

  ‘I second that.’ Toby two added.

  ‘So what are we actually voting for?’ Molly one asked.

  ‘We are deciding whether to risk turning the leprechauns who were tried and convicted of murder, back from stone.’ Stuart one answered. ‘Are there any amendments?’

  There were none and no one spoke.

  ‘All those in favour of waking them up?’ Stuart one asked, after a short pause.

  No one raised their hand.

  ‘All those against?’

  All the hands went up except Stuart one.

  ‘Do you get to vote?’ JC asked Stuart two.

  ‘Well he has the deciding vote in a tie, it would be silly for both of us to get to vote, only when it was a tie. If we both voted differently, it would still be a tie!’ Stuart two answered. ‘Where would that get us?’

  ‘He is right.’ Toby added. ‘You can’t have two with casting votes.’

  ‘It makes sense.’ Celia one agreed.

  ‘So let’s start raising our army.’ Stuart declared.

  They tried doing the first one with out holding him at all and he just looked round at the state of the village and all the other stone leprechauns.

  ‘What happened?’ He asked.

  ‘Fergus will explain to you what is happening Mr. Leprechaun.’ Simon one answered and moved on to the next one.

  One leprechaun was drunk when the apprentice turned him to stone and it followed that when they turned him back he was still drunk and oblivious to what was going on around him. He was singing loudly and badly. Fergus just turned him back to stone.

  ‘We can’t have him alerting the apprentice.’ He announced and winked at Simon.

  Slowly they worked their way through the villagers and turned any of the leprechauns who could fight, back from stone, leaving the women leprechauns and children leprechauns, still made of stone, for their own protection.

  ‘It is safer like this.’ Fergus said sadly. ‘We can turn them back when the apprentice is defeated. He can do other things to them apart from turning them to stone.’ As he spoke, he was looking at his wife and children, who were still in a family group but made of stone. ‘To think I forgot about this place and them.’ He sighed. ‘I was so intent on righting things and putting the wizard back in charge.’

  ‘I suppose you must lose something each time you are reincarnated.’ Toby one speculated.

  ‘Are you inferring that I am inferior to you?’ Toby two asked.

  ‘Stop it you two.’ Celia exclaimed. ‘This man is looking at his family, who just happen to be made of stone, if you hadn't noticed and you are arguing who is top dog out of the two of you!’

  ‘We can change them back!’ Toby two declared.

  ‘I agree with Celia.’ Sherman two added and moved between them.

  ‘So what do we do now?’ Simon one asked.

  ‘Talk to Fergus and change all those he says we need back alive, while I go and look at the apprentice’s palace.’ Stuart one answered. ‘I will try to work out how to sneak in while the army is doing battle with the apprentice. We need to find the second spellbook and the wizard.’

  ‘Where did you put the other book Fergus?’ Simon one asked.

  ‘I didn’t see it or I would have made sure it was never found.’ Fergus answered. ‘It was outsiders who caused all this in the first place.’

  ‘Where is it then?’ Simon one asked, deep in thought.

  He did not expect an answer, he was really asking himself.

  ‘Where you left is I suppose,’ Toby alluded, ‘which obviously just happened to be where you weren’t looking.’

  Simon remained deep in thought.

  ‘So where are these outsiders?’ Toby two asked, trying to prove he was still ‘all there’.

  ‘They are in the apprentice’s garden with a number of statues of me.’ Fergus answered. ‘You can turn both of them back to flesh and blood and take them out with you when you leave!’

  ‘Why aren’t they walking about like us then?’ JC one asked. ‘You know, quid pro quo and all that, no one can die.’

  �
�They were the ones who started all this. From what I understand of it, they came into this world somehow and brought the book with them. The apprentice happened to see them first, he took them up onto the plateau out of sight, on the pretext of sending them home and turned them to stone. He spent his spare time up there and practiced the spells in the book until he was ready to catch the wizard unawares.’ Fergus answered. ‘How he beat the wizard I will never know.’

  ‘You can ask the wizard when we free him.’ Stuart one replied.

  'That obviously happened before the wizard cast the quid pro quo spell then.' Toby one observed.

  'I was just about to say that very thing.' Toby two declared.

  Celia gave him her, not one more word stare and neither one spoke again.

  ‘We will take them with us, if we do actually get out of here.’ Stuart one answered. ‘Now I want four leprechauns with me when I sneak up on the apprentice’s palace but remember, we are not there to fight, I just don’t want to be turned into stone again and I certainly don't want to be eaten by something! The rest of you wait here and if I don’t come back the other Stuart is in charge.’

  Fergus selected three leprechauns to assist him and they waited with Stuart one while he issued more instructions.

  'And remember, the apprentice cannot see more than one of you at any one time or he will know something is going on.' Stuart one warned everyone before he left with his protectors.

  Stuart and the four leprechauns started for the palace with one leprechaun leading the way ten metres in front. If the apprentice saw him coming and turned him to stone, at least he would not know about the rest. As the five grew nearer to the wizard’s palace, they had to be quiet but using the information that the apprentice's garden had some of the stone leprechauns in it as ornaments helped. They made good cover for them to hide behind. As the leprechauns were so close to the palace in made turning them back from stone to join their army a problem but Stuart worked out a plan, one which Just might work. They crept up behind the statues to see what the apprentice was doing. Stuart was glad he had left the rest of the leprechauns behind as some of them might have wanted to go into the palace and try to defeat him there and then. He wanted to know what the apprentice had planned. They watched for some time until the apprentice walked out and cut round the side of the palace. He walked away, looking at his watch. The five watched him go and kept quiet until he was out of sight.

  ‘He knows where you will come and try to stop him by the minute,’ Stuart declared, ‘he will soon be back with another statue.’

  ‘So what do we do now? There are going to be fifty of us, so we should be able to take on the apprentice and free the wizard.’ Fergus asked.

  ‘Do you know what the palace is like inside, Fergus?’ Stuart asked.

  ‘Sort of.’ Fergus answered.

  ‘Good, we go back now and send out spies to work out where he goes and what he does. When we know what he is going to be doing, we can work out how to catch him.’ Stuart explained.

  ‘Why not just turn him to stone?’ Another of the leprechauns asked.

  ‘Because he cannot die, there is only one of him and he will be reborn. You must pin him down until the wizard is free, when the wizard is free he will deal with the apprentice.’ Stuart answered.

  ‘So he would come back, like when he turns me to stone?’ Fergus declared.

  ‘Yes, even if you hit him over the head with something, he would just be reincarnated. You must just stop him from doing anything until the wizard is ready to do battle. Like we held you still when we turned you back from stone.’ Stuart explained. ‘I think we can sneak into the garden and turn these other copies back when he goes after the next new leprechaun.’ Stuart answered. ‘It appears that there is a set attack pattern in your memory when you are remade and he knows them all. That one we were going to turn back who was farthest from the wizard’s palace will be the best time to strike but we need to work out which one of you that was and who was before that.’

  ‘That was the copy of me before me.’ Fergus replied. ‘The copy before that tried to sneak into the garden like we have. He tried to sneak up on him using the other Fergus’s as cover but the apprentice knew he was coming that way somehow and was waiting for him.’

  ‘How long have we been stone brother Fergus?’ A leprechaun asked.

  ‘How long you ask,' Fergus answered, 'well, my youngest was six when the apprentice turned him to stone and now he would be,' he paused for a few seconds, 'very old I think.'

  ‘So that means he must have turned you to stone many times so there are a lot of copies of you round the wizardom.' The leprechaun replied.

  'That is true brother Sean, there are copies of me all round the wizardom but to turn them all back will point to there being a change in the land and the boys do not want to alert the apprentice to their presence until they are on their way out with the books and the two who caused all this.' Fergus answered.

  ‘Hang on, why were you laying down, when we found you?’ Stuart asked.

  ‘I was crawling forward on my belly to get a better shot at the apprentice but someone must have tipped him off and he got behind me somehow.’ Fergus explained.

  'You were crawling through a swamp to surprise him?' Stuart asked.

  'No I was not in the forest when I was trying to sneak up on him, I was here in this very garden. That is why I knew about the other ones, the ones who brought the book in, he talked to them as though they were alive and thanked them for bringing the book in for him. I stopped and listened for a while and he said they were gullible for thinking that he was going to open a portal out of the wizardom for them. If he knew how to do that he would have done so many years ago.' Fergus answered.

  ‘So because you were lying down, you were not a good enough figure to have in the garden and he moved you out to where we found you.’ Stuart observed.

  ‘Yes into that swamp,’ the leprechaun replied with a heartfelt complaint easy to hear and the smell easy to smell, ‘not good enough indeed!’

  ‘We will go back now and discuss it where we cannot be overheard.’ Stuart said in a lower voice.

  They slipped away and headed back to the village where they found the rest eating and drinking in amongst the other leprechauns. The leprechauns that the others, the team members who stayed in the village, had changed back while Fergus was gone, walked up and shook his hand. Everything had been explained to them, even the need to keep their families made of stone for the present. They were ready, willing and able to fight the apprentice, after his sneaky attack on them. Stuart realized just how hungry he was and ate while Fergus explained to them just what was wanted. While four leprechauns slipped out of the village to watch what the Wizard got up to he ate his first hot meal since arriving in this weird underworld. It was duck cooked on a spit and he did not ask where it came from, he just ate.

  Somehow, Fergus knew that one of the copies of him had been more successful than the others, when he attacked the first time. He thought deeply and remembered what he had tried that day. He had gone into the dark forest on the other side of the nether world and enlisted the aid of the wild animals there to help keep the apprentice busy. He was hoping that they would keep him busy while he could either get past him to free the wizard or turn the apprentice into stone and then free the wizard. That time, the apprentice was bleeding by the time he turned that particular copy of Fergus to stone. Fergus had called it a success as he had made it inside the palace before the apprentice found him.

  ‘It was a good plan brother,' another leprechaun declared, ‘so what went wrong?’

  ‘I can tell you brother.’ Fergus announced. ‘The copy who used that very plan had the apprentice moving back, faced with so many wild animals but the apprentice turned himself into a tiger and the animals ran away in fear. It very nearly worked but now I realize that he would have just come back as I had so many times.’

  'Where did you enlist the help of the animals?' Stuart asked.


  'From the wild forest we rarely go near, I know he will be ready for that one when it comes again but if the copy of me can persuade the animals to help again, the apprentice will be two leagues from his palace and it will be a good time to arrange the ambush.’ Fergus answered.

  ‘It sounds like a good idea,’ another leprechaun agreed, ‘but the apprentice must not see more than one of us at a time before we attack, or he will know that something is afoot.’

  ‘I think there are four places we should watch from, there we will see all that goes on and we can tell the others what we see.’ Fergus suggested.

  ‘A sound idea brother, we will do it.’ Sean answered.

  Stuart nodded, his mouth was full of food.

  ‘This is a nice place.’ Simon two declared.

  ‘It’s certainly safer in the village than out there!’ Molly one answered. ‘The gryphon and that other thing don’t fly round overhead in here picking up some unfortunate person as a meal.’

  ‘The other one would be the opinicus.’ Both Tobys answered, almost in unison.

  ‘And they have their own fruit trees growing in here.’ Simon one added, in between mouthfuls.

  ‘It seems like a different world in here.’ Jenny one said happily. ‘It’s a shame we have to go out and fight the apprentice, to try to free the wizard.’

  ‘Enjoy it while you can,’ Jenny two answered, ‘that’s my motto. Don't worry about tomorrow when it is likely to be painful.’

  ‘I think I know that already.’ Jenny one retorted.

  ‘Sorry for speaking.’ Jenny two snapped.

  ‘Cut it out you two.’ Sherman one ordered.

  ‘It seems we can’t get on with ourselves very well,’ Ben one commented, ‘so the sooner we get out of here, the better.’

  ‘Should we separate and go into two groups, while we are waiting for the battle to start?’ Stevey two asked.

  ‘No, in the jungle we learnt to work together and here it will be no different. We will learn to get along while we are in here.’ Stuart one ordered. ‘We can’t have one group doing one thing and us doing another, can we? Together we can beat the apprentice with the help of the leprechauns, to beat him on our own; we would have to be very lucky.’