The Most Dangerous Mitch in the Multiverse

by Paul Ormond

  “Yeah, they seem to have had an inverse affect,” Gareth said while evading a strike.

  “What’s plan B?”

  “Plan B? I thought you had all the plans.”

  “I’m not a planner,” Sage said as he lopped off a troll's arm before backing up against the wall of the ravine.

  “I don’t think it will matter if we have a plan or not,” Gareth said, joining Sage. “If we flee, we’ll lose at least two levels, but if we die, we’re gonna lose all that loot.”

  “Both options are bad, but the GM may decide to take everything if we don’t put up a fight,” Sage said while sending out a blast of fire from his hand. “I’ve still got a few spells. Let’s see if we can wear them down a bit before getting close.”

  “I can play that game,” Gareth said, letting loose a blast of his own. “Let’s keep ‘em at bay. Maybe we can take a few of them down before we run out of ammo.”

  “Agreed,” Sage said before he fired at the trolls again. “But I think we might be taking them on sooner than later. I’m almost out.”

  “Me, too,” Gareth shouted while releasing a bomb from his hand. “It’s been nice campaigning with you, Sage. Hopefully, we can link up again when we reboot.”

  “Don’t talk like that,” Sage said as he gripped out his sword. “These disgusting meatbags haven’t killed us yet, and I’m not going down with a fight. Are you with me or not?”

  “Of course I’m with you,” Gareth said, brandishing his ax. “I’ve never run a way from a fight in my life.”

  “Now you’re talking,” Sage said as the remaining trolls roared in anger before mounting a collective charge. “I’m not ready to go down yet.”

  The ground shook underneath their feet, but Sage and Gareth held their ground while the horde of trolls bore down upon them.

  “On the count of three, let’s jump,” Sage said, pulling back his sword. “Three, two, one.”

  Leaping into the air, Sage swung out at the closest troll, slicing into its flesh. The beast reared back in pain, and he shot toward its head, leveling his sword at the creature's neck. As Sage severed the Troll’s head from its body, a maelstrom of fire broke out overhead forcing the remaining trolls to retreat from their attack.

  Without looking back, Sage charged toward the wounded trolls and struck out at the nearest form, cutting off another hulking limb. Gareth joined his side, swinging his ax with abandon while fire rained down from above. After the last troll fell, Sage and Gareth pulled back and looked up to the top of the ravine.

  “Glad to see you could join us on such short notice,” Sage said, wiping off his blade.

  “I’d say you cut it pretty close,” Gareth said as he sat down on a rock.

  “You two get pinned down by a few measly trolls and you start sending out distress signals?” Donnie Henderson said before he dropped down to the floor of the ravine. “You do realize how many bonus points you lose if you call for help?”

  “I think it halves your bonus, but everyone is saying different things these days,” Greg Curtis said, joining Donnie's side.

  “You guys have no idea how close you were to getting terminated there,” Darren Francis said while floating down behind the others.

  “I’m well aware of how close we were, Darren,” Sage said. “Hopefully you guys weren’t too busy grinding away in the sheep valley.”

  “The sheep valley has been all but shut down,” Greg said, resting against his spear. “If you harvest over 300 points, an unbeatable demon appears and chases you out of the realm.”

  “Everybody knows that,” Gareth said. “Only noobs mess around in the valley of the sheep. But that doesn’t matter, we’ve got more important matters to discuss.”

  “Like how much loot you’re gonna gift me after we saved your asses,” Darren said, settling onto a stump.

  “The loot won’t matter much after what we’ve got to say,” Sage said while glancing at his friends. “We’ve heard rumors that Mitch Mythic has returned.”

  “What? In Kingsford?” Greg asked.

  “I don’t know,” Sage said. “We just overheard a player claiming to be with the ‘Thunder riders’ saying Mitch Mythic is back and he is rallying players to the valley of the damned.”

  “That sounds fishy, AF,” Donnie said. “If Mitch came back, why would he be playing DeathWorld?”

  “Apparently it has something to do with the Easter eggs, but we didn’t hear enough before they took off,” Gareth said as he looted the trolls.

  “Hey, we said 50-50,” Sage said while he watched Gareth inspecting the torsos.

  “We did, but I don’t think we can call it 50-50 anymore,” Gareth said. “Without these guys we’d be splattered across this ravine. I’m going to set up a collective loot and we can all add our earnings as a party. If those douche-bags from Vanderton are banding together, we’d better do the same.”

  “Can’t argue with that,” Sage said, rising to his feet. “If there are rumors running around about Mitch being back, we need to get to the bottom of this as a team.”

  “I’m with you on that,” Donnie said. “Mitch either has extraordinarily bad luck, or he’s the savior of the universe. But no matter what, he’s our friend, and I’ve got his back.”

  “I put forth the motion that we form our league here and now,” Gareth said as he stepped into the middle of the ravine. “Who will join me on this epic quest to find #epiccrotchshot boy?”

  “I’m with you all the way,” Donnie said.

  “I wouldn’t miss it for all the coin in DeathWorld,” Darren said after he jumped to his feet.

  “If Mitch is back, then we owe it to him to pitch in,” Greg said. “I never met a guy more dedicated to his teammates.”

  “It’s settled then,” Sage said. “The Band of Kings is formed on this day in DeathWorld. If Mitch Mythic lives, we will find him and aid him in battle. But if this turns out to be a lie, we will hunt down the perpetrators and cut them in half.”

  “Hear, Hear,” Gareth said, pounding his ax against his shield. “The KingsBand is formed. From this day forth we shall set out across DeathWorld in search of Mitch Mythic and destroy all non-believers.”

  “I’m sorry, but all of this talk sounds like you guys have drunk from the wrong bowl of Kool-aid,” Greg said as he glanced at his friends.

  “If you’re not a true believer, Greg,” Sage said. “You can just head home and forget all your worries with a nice bag of tacos and some single player mode. We’re all in this together. If Mitch is actually back, I’m going to find out for myself, but if somebody is impersonating our friend, I’ll cut them in half with this very sword.”

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  “NOW THAT WE’VE gotten the transaction out of the way,” Ramon said after pocketing his phone. “There’s another matter I’d like to discuss.”

  “I’m pleased to be of help,” XiaoFan said as she opened her phone and watched her boins rise by several digits. “What would you like to discuss?”

  “I’m not sure if they have a saying like this in Chinese, but there is something about one man’s trash being another’s treasure,” Ramon said.

  “I am familiar with the concept,” XiaoFan said. “As you can see, this is something I have surrounded myself with.”

  “That you have,” Ramon said. “While the amount we have purchased here is ample, it appears we will be ramping up production, and I will be in need of a larger supply.”

  “I’ll do as much as I can, but, unfortunately, the materials you are looking for are a little hard to come by,” XiaoFan said, stealing a glance at her sister. “We combed through mountains of waste to recover the devices necessary for your request.”

  “I’m well aware of these difficulties. The adventure we have been on to obtain the necessary supplies for our project is enough to fill a novel,” Ramon said while the others chuckled. “But you pick up things as you go, and it’s amazing how much one can still learn by doing a little research. China, your country, happens t
o produce most of the world’s rare earth materials, but, as the name implies, they are difficult to come by. For fringe players like us, accessing the supply pool has proven to be a challenge. Your government keeps close tabs on the comings and goings of these materials, and the U.S. takes a great interest in anyone purchasing rare earth substances. It’s a sensitive industry, I gather.”

  “You have done your homework, Mr. Ramon,” XiaoFan said. “The paperwork is a bit of a chore when it comes to my country’s government, and they frown upon my line of work, hence our clandestine operation here in this shack. As profitable as it is, I cannot see the conditions changing in the near future, so an increase in production will be hard to muster.”

  “Perhaps we could bring about a change to the conditions.”

  “What kind of change are we discussing, Mr. Ramon?”

  “A mountain of change if you will,” Ramon said before he lit a cigarette. “When I spoke of trash earlier, I wasn’t only referring to your line of work. The world, it would appear, is brimming with waste products of every kind. And, as I said, I’ve been educating myself a lot recently. I came across a term I’d never heard of before a couple days ago: phosphogypsum. Ever heard of it?”

  “I am unfamiliar with this word, Mr. Ramon.”

  “That’s not surprising, most people aren’t. But in your line of work I think you might be hearing it a lot in the near future,” Ramon said after exhaling a cloud of smoke. “Phosphogypsum is a waste product created during the production of phosphoric acid. Phosphate rock is not entirely rich in rare earth materials, but there is enough to make it worth getting out, although the conventional methods are rather pricy. The materials we’re most interested in, the 57-71s, just happen to be found in these types of stone. When they break it down into phosphoric acid, the rare earth materials get left behind in the waste, in the phosphogypsum.”

  “That’s very interesting, Mr. Ramon. But I’m not entirely sure how it affects our relationship.”

  “It affects it in every way. I didn’t come here to just buy some recycled bits and bore you with my research, XiaoFan. What we have planned is far more expansive,” Ramon said.

  “You have a lot of ambition, but I should warn you about biting off more than you can chew. Upping production will draw more attention to my activities. Activities that are not supposed to be seen.”

  “Just up the road from here is the Kunming Phosphate Chemical Group’s main plant. I’m sure you are aware of this monstrosity.”

  “It is hard to ignore. The company employs most of the men in our small town, and their waste ponds cover half of the district.”

  “And that is where we come to the interesting part.”

  “Yes, the phosphogypsum, as interesting as it sounds, I’m afraid any effort of yours to extract the material from the plant will be fruitless. I would take an enormous machine years to extract the material.”

  “That may be the case if we were talking about conventional means, but as you can see we are not conventional people, nor are you, XiaoFan.”

  “Perhaps, but I don’t see anyway you could access the plant, extract the materials and get out without drawing attention.”

  “Once again, XiaoFan, you are looking at this through the wrong scope. What if I were to tell you that we could build the device to extract the materials right now in this very room?”

  “I’d say that you are crazy, and I think you should leave.”

  “Not without hearing my proposal. If I could offer you riches beyond your wildest dreams, would you be willing to take a risk that may alter your life forever?”

  “I do not like the direction this conversation is taking. My father was sent to prison for far less than what we are undertaking at this moment. The risks I am taking speaking with you are more than enough, thank you. If you don’t mind, I’d like for you to leave.”

  “That’s just the thing. We know about your father, and we know about your situation. He’s doing hard time, but with enough money you could get him out of there and level yourselves up considerably.”

  “And risk going to prison?”

  “You are going to have to take some risks if you want to get what you want. What we are about to do will change everything and you could be in on the ground floor. You are the only person in the world capable of what you are doing, and I am offering you the opportunity to take your skills to the next level and beyond.”

  “What exactly are you trying to do?”

  “Yes, we can talk. Just hear me out, and I’m sure you won’t say no.”

  “I’m listening, but I will not make any promises.”

  “Up to you, but, we are going ahead with this with or without you and it is going to happen faster than you think.”

  “Um, now I’m even more frightened.”

  “There is no need to worry. What we are about to do will bring no harm, and if we are lucky, no one will even notice.”

  “Somehow, I highly doubt that.”

  “Don’t doubt me until you hear what I’ve got to say. Those tailing ponds you spoke of earlier. When they dry, the crusty stuff leftover is the phosphogypsum. There is nowhere to put it, so they just keep piling it up. It now towers over the factory.”

  “We call that pile ‘the Mountain that never stops.’”

  “Understandably. That thing is huge, and it’s not going anywhere. But it could turn out to be an invaluable source of the material we need for our project. The phosphate rock they use at the factory is very rich in deposits of 57-71.”

  “That may be true, but, like I said, I have no idea how you could get the material out.”

  “What if I told you that we could, and we have the power right here to do it?”

  “I’d say that you are crazy. How could you possibly pull the materials of that mountain?”

  “We shouldn’t have any trouble draining that whole mountain tonight, if we can get a little help form you.”

  “This sounds like trouble.”

  “And you’ll be in a lot of trouble if we don’t pull this off.”

  “What do you mean trouble?”

  “I’m not threatening you, but we’ve got some friends that work in certain channels that can make things go really well for your family, but if you don’t help us, things will take a turn for the worse.”

  “How come it sounds exactly like you are threatening me?”

  “I’m offering to help. It just so happens to be an offer you can’t refuse.”

  “How come every offer I get ends up ending this way?”

  “It is just the way things are? Help us pull this off and everything will be fine.”

  “Just tell me what you want to do.”

  “Now we’re talking. This container here is filled with enough terbium to make thousands of phones, but I want you to do your magic and pour it all into one device.”

  “That’s all you want me to do?”

  “That and some other things, but we’ll get to the rest later. First, let’s talk about smelting this stuff down.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  “YOU’D BETTER GET up, Mitch.”

  Drak’s voice said from nearby.

  “What happened? That thing had me. Then there were these people flying,” Mitch said as he climbed out of a pile of rubble and dusted himself off.

  “Be quiet, Mitch,” SoHee said from his other side while keeping her eyes fixed in the direction of the light.

  Turning around, Mitch had to cover his eyes as he was blinded by a bright blue glow.

  “So I wasn’t hallucinating,” Mitch said.

  Standing on a pile of rubble were a dozen humanoids dressed in loose white robes covering metallic armor. Each figure wore a sleek mask with pale blue light emitting from two eye sockets.

  “Who the hell are these guys?” Mitch whispered.

  “How come you can’t keep your mouth shut?” SoHee said without looking at him.

  “Yeah, listen to your girlfriend and shut your pretty mouth, Mitch Mythic,�
�� Kate said from behind.

  “Not responding to that,” Mitch said before he spotted Drak ahead of their party. Holding his staff in his right hand, Drak stood unflinching before the group of figures looking down upon them from the pile of rubble.

  “I can’t tell if this a good thing or a bad thing,” Mitch whispered to SoHee. “But with our luck, it will probably be a bad thing.”

  “I don’t think your little comments are helping the situation,” SoHee whispered while the standoff continued.

  Mitch was about to reply, but the figure at the center of the group broke rank and pushed forward through the air. Dropping to the ground before Drak, the figure’s mask pulled back to reveal a dark-skinned feminine face.

  “This domain is strictly off limits. Who are you and how did you come here?” the woman said, locking eyes with Drak.

  “I’m a soldier returning home,” Drak said, not moving.

  “A soldier?” the woman asked. “A soldier in who’s army?”

  “A citizen of Chalthantar.”

  “That kind of talk could get you killed.”

  “This is a truth I have come to know well.”

  “If you are a Chalthantarian, who are these alien companions of yours?”

  “They look like spies, if you ask me,” a man said after peeling back his mask.

  “Nobody asked you,” the woman said. “This is a dangerous place. How is it that you have ventured into this region? You are standing on forbidden ground. The Masters execute trespassers on site if found in this zone.”

  “And why aren’t you executing us?”

  “That is a good question. Why am I not executing you?”

  “Because I am a soldier of Chalthantar. I am returning from a mission that took me across the multi-verse. I can’t go into any details at the moment, but we are not enemies. We will surrender our weapons and be at your mercy if you will allow me the opportunity to speak to your commanding officer.”

  “You will have the opportunity to speak after we place you and your companions into holding cells. You have the look of a rebel soldier. I have orders to shoot your kind on sight, but I think Captain Juvius will be interested in your story,” the woman said as she looked over her shoulder “Restrain them and bring them in. They will come peacefully.”