“Is that right?”
“Yeah, so you’re gonna need to revert back to the way you were looking a few minutes ago if I’m gonna be able to make an accurate assessment of my feelings for you,” he toyed.
“Whatever!” She simulated a stop sign with her right hand. “What are you doing here anyhow? I thought this was your Saturday to work.”
“It was, but my buddy, Mitch, owed me a favor, and agreed to cover my shift. I wanted to come by and give you this.” He pulled a box of candy and a small stuffed teddy bear from behind his back.
“Oh my gosh! Thank you! What did I do to deserve such a sweet gesture?”
“You didn’t do anything.” He kissed her on the forehead. “I just happened to be out and decided to pick up something for you.”
“Thank you.” Natalie gave him a warm smile.
“You are very welcome.” Troy brushed his lips across hers before walking completely into the apartment and hanging his jacket on the coatrack. “Did you have any plans for this evening?” he asked as they walked past her navy-blue velvet chaise to the couch.
“Nope...I was gonna try and finish getting the computer room together, then take a break and see if any good movies are on Lifetime.” Natalie placed her gifts on the glass cocktail table.
Troy playfully rolled his eyes and sighed. “Is that the only channel females know how to find?” he teased. “You remind me of my mother and sister. They can watch Lifetime all day long.”
“Hey, don’t make fun of my channel. They have good movies, you know? For men and women. Maybe if you weren’t so chauvinistic, you would’ve realized that by now,” she kidded.
“Maybe if I hadn’t been forced to watch a four-hour miniseries the time my keys mysteriously disappeared, I’d have more of an open mind.” He was referring to an incident that had happened a while back when Natalie was still living in her mother’s house. Troy had come over to help with the garage sale. Later that day, as Natalie was flipping through the television stations she came across a movie on Lifetime that she was interested in. Immediately, Troy assumed it was a chick flick and mentioned that he was going home to play his Xbox 360 for the remainder of the evening. But Natalie was enjoying his company and didn’t want him to leave, so she hid his car keys. Troy was a good sport about the whole situation. At first, he searched around the house to see if he could find them, but then he gave up and sat through the rest of the movie for her sake.
“It’s funny how your keys turned up after the movie, isn’t it? I guess that’s what happens when you’re prejudiced like that...”
“How could you say something so hurtful?” He pretended to be on the verge of crying.
“Toughen up...” Natalie softly hit him in the arm.
Troy laughed as he pulled her closer to him. “I was really hoping that you would go somewhere with me. But if you prefer to stay here and watch your precious network, then you’ll miss out on spending the next two nights at Hocking Hills.”
A bright smile crossed Natalie’s face. Hocking Hills was located about an hour southeast of Columbus in Logan. She’d never been there, but she’d heard that the place was very secluded and a romantic spot. “I suppose I could accompany you.”
“Oh no, don’t bother...you just stay here and watch television. I had another female on reserve in case you couldn’t make it,” he joked.
Natalie pulled away and hit him hard this time.
“Ouch!” Troy rubbed his forearm where her fist had landed. “Why you gotta be so violent?”
“You better call and tell her to unpack her bags because I’ll be the only woman you’ll be spending the weekend with!”
“Well, you better get packing.”
She smiled at him again. “Give me fifteen minutes and I’ll be ready.” She gave him a peck before jumping up and going to her bedroom. “How long are we staying?” Natalie yelled out to him.
“’Til Monday morning, if that’s all right with you,” he hollered back. “There was a minimum two-night stay. We can leave early Monday morning—because I know you have to get back for work. I do, too.”
“Okay.” Natalie smiled, feeling like Cinderella being whisked away by her prince. As much as she hated to admit it, she was developing real feelings for Troy. In a way, it scared her because she was used to keeping her heart out of relationships. She’d dated other men in the past that she’d liked, but none that she’d truly cared for. Things were different with Troy and she couldn’t say for certain why that was.
Maybe he’d caught her at a vulnerable time in her life. There were absolutely no hidden agendas when they met. Natalie wasn’t after his money, trying to break up a marriage or scheming to do anything she had done previously in other relationships. Yes, the sex was great, but that wasn’t even the main attraction. He made her feel special and Natalie had allowed Troy to see a side of her that other men hadn’t by sharing her most intimate feelings with him. She’d even broken down and recited one of her poems to him.
The five months they’d been together now had brought her a sense of security—something that she had never really had in previous relationships. Natalie had never let down her guard with men the way she had with Troy. When she was going through her mother’s things, he was right there wiping her tears as she shared stories with him. Maybe Natalie had allowed Troy to get so close to her heart because she was in an emotionally weakened state after her mother’s death. Perhaps she longed for the euphoria of experiencing true love similar to what she had heard in Sylvia’s voice the night they’d talked about Richard. Whatever the reason, Natalie couldn’t deny that she was falling hard for Troy.
In another week or so, she would be eligible to put in for a transfer to New York with Dennison. Though it would likely take a few months for the transfer to go through, she was having second thoughts about moving. She told Troy it was because she wanted to give herself more time to save. However, the truth was, she had plenty of money in her savings thanks to the sale of the house. She wasn’t ready to leave him. Meeting Troy had given her a reason to stay around Columbus.
“I’m all set.” She bounced into the living room with her luggage in hand. They were only going to be gone for two days and yet she had packed at least five days’ worth of clothing, in addition to her intimate apparel. She doubted that she and Troy would be doing much sightseeing outside of their cabin, but she still wanted to make sure she had a variety of outfit choices available to her rather than being stuck wearing only one or two things. The fifteen minutes she’d promised had actually turned into about forty and Troy definitely took note.
“Maybe you misunderstood me...I said we’d only be gone for two days, not twenty,” he teased.
“When you see my stash of Victoria’s Secret goodies you’re gonna wish it was the other way around.”
“I bet I will...” he replied passionately.
Chapter 15
Doctor Feel Good
Her head spinning like a top, Natalie jumped up and ran to the bathroom just in time for last night’s dinner to make its way back up her esophagus and into the toilet. The strong wind pounding against the window did not make the situation any better. Rather, the noise seemed to magnify threefold in her head. The signs that winter was here had definitely appeared. The cold weather didn’t bother Natalie, however, since her heart had been steadily warmed with the presence of Troy in her life.
What a way to start the New Year! she thought as her head hung over the commode. Today was January first, and based on the look of things, she would not be having a good day. Next month would mark the one-year anniversary of her mother’s death. Back then it was as if her world had completely stopped. Thanks to Troy, it had begun rotating again. Although neither had uttered the words, Natalie knew that Troy loved her just as much as she loved him. She could tell by his actions and the way he showered her with hi
s attention and affection.
The difference between him and most other guys she’d dated was that it was clear that Troy wasn’t in this relationship just for the physical pleasure. Though they were intimate the night of their first date, there were other occasions when they spent nights just talking and cuddling. Whenever they did make love, Natalie found it way more enjoyable with Troy than with any other man because she wasn’t just spending time with him for money or for any other type of assistance. She was intimate with Troy because she loved being with him, and the more their relationship progressed, the more she opened her heart. Now he had full access, not only to her heart, but to her apartment as well, because she had given him a spare key—though most of the time he still knocked whenever he came by.
After involuntarily emptying the contents of her stomach, Natalie flushed the toilet and washed her face. She felt nauseated and her head hurt as though she had a hangover, except she hadn’t been drinking last night. Natalie had brought the New Year in curled up on the couch under a blanket. She’d wished Troy was here, but he’d been in Houston for the last week visiting his family. She would have liked to have gone with him except Troy hadn’t offered to take her along, and she hadn’t asked.
Spending time alone this holiday season was difficult for Natalie because Christmas was her mother’s favorite holiday. She missed the Christmas stockings that Sharon used to decorate, the eggnog that never tasted quite right and the selection of Christmas carols that her mother used to slaughter.
Though Natalie hadn’t been to Mississippi in nearly two decades, she’d briefly considered going when Troy had announced he’d be in Houston for the holidays. Talking with her grandmother so much this year had brought back a deep longing to see her again, but ultimately Natalie wasn’t sure if she could get over the apprehension about facing her past. As a desperate attempt to fight loneliness, she thought about calling over to Sylvia’s house to see what her Christmas plans were. She changed her mind, assuming that somehow Sylvia’s plans would involve Richard, and Natalie wasn’t quite ready to spend the day with the two of them. She and Sylvia hadn’t exactly become bosom buddies, but they did speak occasionally. Natalie had felt so isolated on Christmas Day that she would’ve driven to Cleveland with Aneetra if she’d been invited.
The phone rang as Natalie was coming out of the bathroom and she hurried to answer it, hoping it was Troy, but one look at the caller ID proved her wrong.
“Happy New Year!” her grandmother said in a Southern drawl, sounding slightly different for some reason.
“Oh hey, Big Mama. Happy New Year to you, too.”
“Were you expectin’ someone else?”
“No, not really.” She still hadn’t told her grandmother about Troy.
“What do you plan on doin’ today?”
“I don’t know. I’ll probably stay in. I don’t feel too good.”
“It might be that ol’ flu bug goin’ around. You ain’t got no fevah, do you?”
Natalie put the back of her hand on her forehead. “No, I don’t think so. Something I ate last night must’ve not agreed with me.”
“Make sure you get some rest.”
“That’s what I plan to do.”
“I’m goin’ over to Toni’s. She called right before I called you and said she would be here in about a half hour to get me. I wanted to call you now ’cuz I’ll probably be over there the whole day. Last night I told her I would help her finish cookin’ before everyone got over there. I guess I better get off the phone and finish gettin’ ready or else she’ll be fussin’ when she gets here. I still gotta put my teeth in and do somethin’ with my hair.”
Natalie couldn’t help but laugh. That explained her grandmother’s odd speech. “Well, you go do what you need to do and I’ll talk to you another time.”
“Okay, honey, I hope you feel better.”
“Thanks, I’m sure I will.”
“All right then, I love you.”
“I know—I love you, too.” Within minutes of hanging up the phone, it rang again. “Happy New Year!”
“Hey, babe...” Troy sounded as though he was still half asleep.
“I see someone did a li’l too much partying last night.”
“If that’s what you call being at the emergency room until two in the morning....”
“Emergency room! What happened? Are you all right?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I went with my sister to take my nephew. He had a fever of a hundred and three.”
“What’s wrong with him?”
“He’s got a bad case of the flu. My sister is just like my mom—she freaks out whenever one of her kids gets sick. Lucky I was here because the two of them acted like they were going to have a nervous breakdown. The doctor prescribed some medicine and said that he should be all right. We’re just keeping a close eye on him.”
“Well, I hope he feels better. I’m not feelin’ too good myself.”
“And you accused me of partying?”
“Whatever...I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Something I ate last night didn’t agree with me.”
“Well, you better get it together because I’m still going to need you to pick me up from the airport. That is, of course, if you want to see me.”
“You’re talkin’ crazy now...”
Troy laughed. “Seriously though, the flu is going around.”
“Yeah, that’s what my grandmother said.”
“Maybe you should go and get checked out at urgent care or something just to be on the safe side.”
“Urgent care is probably packed around this time of the year. I’ll just wait and see how I feel in a few days. Besides, the only doctor I’m anxious to see is my personal Doctor Feel Good. You’re the only one who can make me feel like a natural woman again.”
“Okay, Aretha Franklin. Why are you starting stuff you can’t back up over the phone? I should probably get off the phone and spend time with my family since it’s my last day and all. I’ll call you tomorrow before I go to the airport.”
“All right...have a safe flight.”
“I plan to. Happy New Year, again.”
“The same to you.” One more day! She couldn’t wait to see Troy tomorrow. Still feeling a little woozy, Natalie decided to lie back down. It wasn’t long before she was rushing off to the bathroom again. After going through this scenario several more times, Natalie was thankful that she had stayed put for the holidays. There was no better place for her to feel crappy than in the comfort of her own home.
Chapter 16
A Thin Line
Natalie walked into her apartment, threw her keys and purse on the coffee table while tossing her coat on the back of the chaise, and plopped down on the couch. She couldn’t wait until Troy got off work. She hated when he worked on Saturdays. Today more than ever, time seemed to be her enemy as it crept by, not caring that she was anxious to talk to him. She thought about calling his cell phone, but figured it would be better to tell him in person. He’d returned from Texas a few weeks ago, and Natalie had continued going through bouts of sickness. At first, she’d thought it was the flu, but the tender breasts, nausea and headaches were all too familiar, and she began to suspect otherwise. A missed menstrual cycle and a positive diagnosis from an obstetrician confirmed that her ailment had nothing to do with influenza.
“I’m going to be a mother...” Natalie smiled and whispered out loud as the reality of her situation sank in. Initially, she’d been stunned by the news and wondered if she would have what it took to be a good mother. Would she be able to prevent her child from experiencing the heartache she’d gone through during her childhood? She’d never been around any babies longer than a couple of hours; would she know how to care for one properly? Though there were other aspects of motherhood that caused Natalie some concern, she couldn’t
help but feel an instantaneous love for her unborn child. Considering children were never part of her plans, Natalie was more excited than she’d ever thought she’d be. She pledged to do her very best to love and care for the baby. What she didn’t know about motherhood, she was willing to learn.
It wouldn’t be long before her flat abdomen stretched out beyond recognition. The doctor had estimated that she was about six weeks pregnant, and had written her out a prescription for prenatal vitamins, which she’d filled before coming home. The stapled paper bag from the pharmacy rested in her purse. Eventually she would tell her grandmother about the pregnancy. Right now, she was more eager to talk to Troy. She suspected Troy would be excited about the baby as well since their relationship had evolved to the point where it seemed like they would be together forever.
The minutes seemed like hours as Natalie listened to the slow tick of the wall clock. It would still be several hours before she saw Troy. He didn’t get off until four. Natalie carelessly flipped through the channels with the remote. Nothing sparked her interest long enough to hasten time—not even the movie playing on her favorite network or the special showing of Steel Magnolias on another channel. With impatience brewing inside, Natalie needed some way to keep busy until Troy got off. With the baby consuming her thoughts, she headed back out the door, deciding to kill time by window-shopping at the place where she assumed she’d be spending at lot of time over the next several months.
* * *
Natalie strutted into Babies “R” Us with excitement. The store was crowded with expectant mothers strolling through the aisles. Even in a place filled with hundreds of others, Natalie felt alone because she didn’t have anyone to shop with as the other women did. “Things won’t be like this forever,” she whispered to herself as reassurance. Once Troy found out about the baby, she suspected it wouldn’t be long before they married. It didn’t matter to her if they did it before or after the expected due date in September. The bottom line was that eventually she, Troy and the baby would be a family.
Secrets of a Sinner Page 9
