Brass Bed

by Flora, Fletcher

  “I certainly have,” I said, “and I’m wondering how he can make any profit serving such drinks.”

  “It’s because he doesn’t hire any waiters or waitresses,” Harvey said. “Except for the preacher, he doesn’t hire anyone at all, which amounts to a large saving in overhead, and he is able to share this saving with the customers in the form of whiskey.”

  “Which is truly noble of him,” Jolly said. “If we are honest, we will all admit that Prince Sam is a noble man of color.”

  Sid came back with the second round of drinks, and the service ended in the tabernacle, and the congregation came out going the wrong way on the sawdust trail and lined up two deep at the bar. One of the men came past our table, carrying his glass, and Jolly reached up and took him by the arm and stopped him. He stood looking down at her politely, his mouth stretching in a great smile, white within crimson within chocolate.

  “Have you been to the service?” Jolly said.

  “Yes,” he said. “It was a fine service. Brother Shark is in exceptionally fine form tonight.”

  “I especially enjoyed the hymns. We could hear them quite clearly on this side of the partition.”

  “Thank you very much.”

  He was extremely polite, concentrating on it and making a great effort so that no one could possibly think that he had been in the least otherwise.

  “Is anyone permitted to attend the services?” Jolly said.

  “Oh, yes. It is not only permitted, it is expected. It is considered a courtesy to Brother Shark.”

  “Brother Shark is the preacher?”

  “Yes. Brother Shark is the preacher’s name.”

  “When does the next service begin?”

  “There is a thirty minute interval between services.”

  “Thank you.”

  She took her hand off his arm, and he nodded and stretched his smile a little wider and went away.

  “He was quite charming, wasn’t he?” Jolly said. “Don’t you think he was charming, Fran?”

  “Yes, I do,” Fran said. “He was charming and polite.”

  “As for me,” Jolly said, “I am determined to attend the next service out of courtesy to Brother Shark. Will anyone attend the next service with me?”

  “Not I,” Sid said. “I consider it sacrilegious to have services in the back room of a tavern, and I don’t intend to go.”

  “The trouble with you, Sid,” Jolly said, “is that you have no imagination and no spirit of cooperation whatever.”

  “Nevertheless,” Sid said, “I don’t intend to go.”

  Jolly shrugged and turned to me. “How about you, Felix? Will you attend the next service with me?”

  “I’m willing to go,” I said, “but I confess that it is more out of curiosity than out of courtesy to Brother Shark.”

  “As a scientific teacher of mathematics,” Harvey said, “I am personally of the opinion that Brother Shark is an unmitigated rascal whose only interest is in the till.”

  “Well, never mind, Jolly,” Fran said. “Felix and Harvey, as you know, are confirmed heathens and cannot be expected to behave in a Christian manner.”

  “I suppose,” Sid said to Fran, “that you count yourself among the Christians?”

  “Certainly,” Fran said. “I am not so religious as Jolly, who will not even tolerate a vulgar parody of a sacred hymn, but I am nevertheless a true Christian in my own way.”

  Sid said a dirty word and drained his glass. The strong drinks of Prince Sam on top of the medium drinks of Sylvester were making him exceptionally independent. They also seemed to be making him rather sleepy. His eyes looked foggy and the lids hung down over them about half way. He sat slumped in his chair with his arms stretched out straight in front of him and the empty glass in his hand and his eyes focused on the glass.

  “I suggest that we all have another drink,” Harvey said.

  Sid roused himself and gathered the glasses and carried them off to the bar. Because of his previous contacts with Prince Sam, he had assumed the right to act as waiter and would not relinquish the job to anyone else. After a while he came back with the third round, and we started working on it, and we finished it in good time and somehow got started on another, and about that time someone started playing the piano in the tabernacle again, and it was time for the service that Jolly and I were going to.

  We decided that it would be a good idea to take a fresh drink to service with us, since it would probably be quite a while before we would have an opportunity to buy another, so we stopped at the bar and got the drinks and carried them down the sawdust trail into the tabernacle and sat down on a hard bench. There was a small pulpit standing near the partition, and Brother Shark was standing behind the pulpit, and about six or eight people came to the service besides Jolly and me, but Jolly was the only woman. Brother Shark was very tall and thin and had enormous ears and a conspicuous and active thyroid cartilage, and at first I thought it was only because I was drunk and inclined to see things in a grandiose way, but Jolly said afterward that she was of the same impression, and I am prepared to swear that Brother Shark was in fact seven feet tall if an inch.

  This was really rather alarming under the circumstances because he kept weaving back and forth and was prevented from falling only by the presence of the pulpit, and it was pretty obvious all in all that he had taken advantage of the intermission between services to bend his elbow several times. It was my opinion, in fact, that he was as drunk as a lord, and I recall that I expressed this opinion in good faith and was called a heathen by Jolly, who expressed the belief that Brother Shark was merely exhausted from his labors, and I wish I could recall the sermon, what was said and all, but the truth is, all I can remember clearly is finishing my drink immediately after the invocation and putting a dollar in the collection plate when it came past just before the benediction. Jolly told me that I shook hands with Brother Shark at the end and introduced myself as a scout for the Harlem Globe Trotters, but I consider this unlikely, though I can’t actually deny it.

  We went back into the tavern and found a couple of empty stools at the bar and spent some time on them, and it was actually quite a bit of time, I think, which encompassed the consumption of several of Prince Sam’s good strong drinks, and then we went on back to the table and found Fran examining Harvey’s cheek to see if the whiskers were yet discernible and Sid sitting slumped over with his head on his arms on the tabletop. Every once in a while, he would shudder and make a strange bubbling sound, something like a death rattle, and it was pretty terrible to hear but did not seem to be in the least disconcerting to Fran and Harvey.

  “What’s the matter with old Sid?” I said.

  “He sounds as if he might be dying,” Jolly said.

  Fran looked up at us and patted Sid’s head without shifting the direction of her gaze.

  “Nothing of the sort. He has simply passed out, and I am quite relieved about it, to tell the truth, because now it is certain that I accused him unjustly of being an alcoholic.”

  “I agree that it’s unlikely that an alcoholic would have passed out so quickly,” Jolly said.

  “Yes,” Fran said, “that must be accepted. As he tried to tell us, he is actually no more than a simple sociable drinker and student of human nature. I did him a grave injustice, and no one will ever know how terrible I feel about it.”

  Tears began running down her cheeks, and Harvey said, “Don’t cry, Fran, don’t cry,” so she quit and began rubbing a hand over his cheek.

  “I think I feel something,” she said.

  “What I think,” I said, “is that we had all better go home.”

  “I’m willing to go home,” Fran said, “but I insist upon going with Harvey.”

  “I insist upon that too,” Harvey said.

  “As for me,” Jolly said, “I am responsible for Sid’s being here, and now that he has made a nuisance of himself and passed out, I will assume the responsibility for getting him home.”

  “Perhaps I
had better go along with you to help,” I said.

  “No.” Jolly shook her head. “Sid lives quite near me, and it will not be much if any out of the way, and if you came along I would have to make a long drive to your place, and I am in no condition for it.”

  She seemed quite determined about it for some reason or other, that I shouldn’t go, and so I didn’t press it, but I couldn’t understand it.

  “Perhaps you and Fran wouldn’t mind dropping me off,” I said to Harvey.

  “Not at all, old boy,” Harvey said. “We will be happy to drop you off, won’t we, Fran?”

  “Yes,” Fran said. “You can depend upon it, Felix, that we will be happy to drop you off as quickly as possible.”

  “In that case,” I said, “I’ll just get Sid into Jolly’s Caddy.”

  He didn’t weigh much, and Harvey helped, and we got him out and into the car. Jolly got in under the wheel beside him.

  “Are you certain you are capable of driving, Jolly?” Fran said.

  “Certainly,” Jolly said. “I am perfectly capable.”

  She backed the Caddy and turned it and drove out of the parking area, and she seemed to do everything efficiently in spite of Prince Sam’s strong highballs. Fran and Harvey were already in Harvey’s crate, and I got in with them, and they took me home.

  16

  THE TELEPHONE was ringing and ringing and wouldn’t quit. I got up slowly and went over to it, and my head expanded and contracted with a painful rhythm, and my tongue felt dead in my mouth. Sunlight entered the window from the east and crossed the floor in a broad swath.

  “Hello,” I said.

  “Hello,” Jolly said. “Is that you, Felix?”

  I stood for a moment and watched dust particles moving lazily in the slanting shaft of light.

  “Yes,” I said.

  “I’m very glad you’re home, because I need you quite desperately, and you must come over at once.”

  “Must I? Why?”

  “I told you, Felix. I need you.”

  “I need you too. I admit now that I need you like the devil, but I am determined nevertheless to survive without you.”

  “Oh, Felix, please don’t be contrary. Something terrible has happened, and I don’t know what to do about it, and you simply must come at once.”

  “What’s happened?”

  “Well, it’s difficult to talk about, but Sid is here, and he seems to be dead.”

  I thought about this briefly without any particular feeling because it seemed to me wholly incredible, there being a heroic dimension and dignity to dying that was surely beyond Sid’s attainment.

  “Sid?” I said. “Sid dead?”

  “Yes.”

  “Are you certain?”

  “He is quite cold and everything, Felix, and he doesn’t move, and I am certain that he is dead.”

  “All right,” I said. “I’ll be right over.”

  I hung up and stood there feeling the rhythmic pumping of my head. The dust particles moved in the shaft of light. The idea of Sid’s being dead still seemed fantastic, and I was not inclined to believe it. I moved through the light and the dust and began to dress and after a while was down in the Chevvie in the street. The Chevvie didn’t want to run, but I insisted, and it finally did. It was a few minutes after ten when it started, and it took me twenty minutes to get it to Jolly’s. I left it at the curb and went inside and found Jolly in the living room. She was sitting in a chair with her hands folded in her lap, and her eyes in the dusk of drawn drapes looked abnormally large and darkly luminous.

  “Thank you for coming, Felix,” she said.

  Her voice was small and handled the ridiculously formal little expression of gratitude as if it were extremely precarious business. I didn’t say anything in response, just staring at her, and she got up unhurriedly and put her arms around me. Her body was quiet against mine, only her breasts moving softly in the act of breathing, and I could feel her warm breath on the side of my neck. I let her hold me and submitted passively to the pain of wanting her, but I did not touch her with my hands.

  “Where’s Sid?” I said at last.

  “He’s in the garage,” she said.

  I put my hands on her then, on her shoulders, and pushed her away.

  “In the garage? What the hell’s he doing there?”

  “He isn’t doing anything, Felix. Being dead, he’s just lying there and doing nothing at all.”

  “Damn it, Jolly, that’s not what I mean. I mean, why did he go to the garage in the first place?”

  “Well, it’s very reasonable, and I’m perfectly willing to tell you all about it, but first I think we had better go look at him and decide what we are going to do about him and all that. Don’t you think so?”

  I didn’t want to go or see him or have anything at all to do with him, but it was necessary to go and see him and do something with him just the same, which was a necessity I could recognize in spite of not wanting to, and so I went. I turned and went out into the hall and back through the kitchen and out into the back yard and down across the yard to the garage, and Jolly came after me. We went into the garage through a small side door, which was standing open, and the big Caddy sat there gleaming and quiet in the interior dusk. Sid was lying on the floor behind the car with his head directly under the exhaust pipe, and the heavy, jointed garage door had been pulled down from overhead and fastened on the inside. He was lying on his side with his face turned so that he seemed to be staring along the floor under the car, and one arm was extended on the concrete as if he had been stretching it out for something that he had wanted and desperately needed and had not reached. I knelt beside him and looked at him closely, and he seemed somehow very small and shrunken and terribly isolated and immune, and I didn’t bother to touch him because he was obviously dead and had been dead for a long time. Standing, I went back along the side of the Caddy, the shining, impersonal murderer, and looked in through the glass of the front door and saw that the ignition was on and the gas gauge registering empty. Jolly was watching me from her position near the small door through which we had entered, and I could hear quite distinctly in that quiet place the measured sound of her breathing. The gas was still heavy, and my head was beginning to hurt, and I went on past her and outside.

  She followed me and said, “You see? As I told you, he is dead.”

  “Why didn’t you call a doctor?” I said.

  “Doctor? Why on earth should I call a doctor, Felix? It is impossible for a doctor to help anyone who is dead.”

  “Nevertheless, calling a doctor would have been appropriate under the circumstances. It’s what almost anyone would have done to start with.”

  “Well, it didn’t seem appropriate to me, and the truth is, I didn’t even consider it after discovering that he was dead.”

  “That’s because you think clearly, I guess. You don’t seem to lose the facility even under the greatest stress, and I really envy you. Now perhaps you will tell me why he came into the garage.”

  “Surely that is obvious, Felix. He was putting the car away for me, of course. He lives only a short distance from here, and he said he would put the car away and walk on. I told him that it was unnecessary to put the car in the garage at all, because we often left it outside and it didn’t matter, but he was quite stubborn about it and insisted on doing it, so I said all right and went on upstairs to bed, and that’s all I know about it.”

  “He was dead drunk.”

  “What?”

  “Sid was. When you left Prince Sam’s Hallelujah House last night. He was dead to the world in the front seat.”

  “That’s true. He was quite drunk, as you say. However, on the way home the cool air revived him, and he sat up and talked quite sensibly. When we got here, he got out in the drive and walked with me to the door, and it was then he said he would put the car in the garage, and I said it was unnecessary, but he insisted.”

  “And you went right upstairs to bed.”

  “As I told
you, yes.”

  “Didn’t you hear anything?”

  “Hear anything? I simply cannot understand what you are trying to get at, Felix. What on earth would I have heard?”

  “The car must have run quite a while before it ran out of gas and died. A lot longer than it took Sid to die.”

  “Don’t be foolish, Felix. An idling Cadillac makes practically no noise at all. Besides, as you see, the garage door was closed quite tightly. In addition to this, which is quite enough in itself, I had drunk quite a lot and probably would not have heard any noise even if there had been any.”

  “I see that the door is closed. It was one of the first things I noticed.”

  “Of course. It would be quite difficult not to notice a closed door.”

  “True enough. The police will notice it also.”

  “The police? What do you mean?”

  “Well, stop and think about it with your usual clarity. Have you ever put the Caddy in the garage yourself?”

  “Yes, I have often put it in the garage.”

  “What was the first thing you did after getting the car inside?”

  She was silent then, except for the soft and aspirate sound of her breathing, and all the scant light in the dim garage seemed to gather and glow in her luminous eyes.

  “Oh,” she said after a moment. “I see what you mean. The first thing I always did, naturally, was turn off the engine.”

  “Yes. Naturally. But Sid didn’t. He got out of the car, leaving the engine running, and closed the door. You must admit it seems peculiar, and the police will think so too.”

  “Is it necessary to call the police?”

  “What?”

  “Aren’t you listening to me at all, Felix? I asked if it is necessary to call the police.”